Try taking it slow, Newbie.

[Tamroi]

To me its no fun doing stuff in hiding. Instead I recommend going out in your normal ways while 24/7 adopting novel stuff slowly. Walmart and thrift stores have almost everything you will want. Start with silky underwear all the time. Select a large black bag at the thrift store. Get your ears pierced (more macho and sensible than tattoos). Experiment with the vast selection of bras from Walmart. Get large sizes without extender and with rounded rather than pointy tops, and a wide back-band. Cut off the straps so they don't show and so you can step into the bra. Cut away everything but the cups of a second bra to use as stiff padding inserts. Though unnecessary, I like a stretchy black belt below my bra, sometimes outside my shirt. Wear your normal shirts over the bra, especially extra long shirts. Experiment with blouses and tank tops from a thrift shop. Do nail polish, starting with clear and blue. Experiment with quiet lipsticks. Eventually replace trousers with thigh high hose and skirts meant for women, especially pleated. You need strong garters like dog collars or double sided velcro. Shave your legs but keep a beard. Skirts and dresses for men have never caught on because fashion moguls want them to be attention grabbing novelties. At the thrift store select some dresses, for starters simple, unpatterned and unwaisted Under them you can wear halter tops and short shorts - and occasionally put the dress in your bag. To me heels are only a pain, and even girls are foolish too wear them. Instead of making announcements about being tranny, simply adopt slowly enough that everyone stays calm.

[Karren H]

Who makes announcements of being a tranny? Besides being demeaning as hell. But who calls themselves that?

And not wear heels? That is sacrilegious around here! Lol.

[docrobbysherry]

Your fetishes r showing, Tamroi!:o

Most of them r quite common here.:thumbsup:
However, I really am confused why u wear halter tops and shorts under a dress!?:eek:

[MonicaPVD]

All over the proverbial map. Take it slow, Tamroi. Take it slow.

[julia.bowie]

My take on your advice for newbies:

"Get your ears pierced (more macho and sensible than tattoos)" --> I've never heard of pierced ears being referred to as macho.

"Cut off the straps so they don't show and so you can step into the bra." --> Cutting off the straps of a bra? I'm confused. The whole idea of a bra is the straps, unless the strapless type.

"Do nail polish, starting with clear and blue." --> Why does someone have to start with blue?

"especially pleated." --> I agree that pleated skirts are feminine but a personal taste.

"You need strong garters like dog collars" --> I've used the same suspenders that women use for several years and not found I need them to be as strong as dog collars.

"Shave your legs but keep a beard." --> Eh? Again, a highly personal decision.

"Skirts and dresses for men have never caught on because fashion moguls want them to be attention grabbing novelties." --> I'm confused. The idea that skirts haven't caught on for me is the whole point underlying crossdressing.

"unpatterned and unwaisted Under them you can wear halter tops and short shorts" --> ?

"occasionally put the dress in your bag" --> ?

"To me heels are only a pain, and even girls are foolish too wear them" --> Wow, you are so wrong on this point. I agree that 6 inch heels could be considered a bit extreme or "foolish" but 2, 3 and even 4 inch heels are not a big deal to walk in. The whole point of heels is how they make legs look elegant. I don't feel dressed until I slip my feet into some heels.

"Instead of making announcements about being tranny, simply adopt slowly enough that everyone stays calm." --> Crossdressing and "tranny" are two separate disciplines completely.

[GretchenM]

Tamroi, I think you have some good advice in places here, but I also agree with others that some are a personal preference. It is more important to recognize that we are all quite different and there is no single pattern that defines us.

The advice about going slow is the best. Maybe not for highly personal times, but for the more public times. If a newbie is unsure of this, not spending a lot of money is great advice. It is easy to fall into that "I need more stuff" mode of thinking. Many women do not have a lot of clothes but they do buy clothes that can be worn with different items they do have to make a lot of outfits without a lot of clothes. I like the idea of "experimenting" with quiet lipsticks - colors that don't differ a lot from your normal lip color but add texture and perhaps moistness. Once again, begin with the mild treatments. I agree on the heels and many of those I know who have transitioned rarely wear heels. My wife and 3 sisters-in-law and daughter never wear heels. But once again, it is a fashion that fits a personal preference. And your last sentence is really important because in the excitement of coming out there is sometimes the urge to tell the world you are trans. Fact is, you might not be but you may have a very well developed female-like aspect to your total identity. In a world where the binary concept still rules, it is easy to think that strong female-like aspect is trans. Jumping to conclusions can be hazardous - so take it slow so "everyone stays calm," or reasonably so.