May have been caught at work!

[leliani]

Not looking forward to Monday :(.

Friday's at work are usually my only times to get dressed. My wife is non-supportive (I opened up to her about my dressing over 10 years ago and we haven't talked about it since...), so I have to dress when and where I can.

My office is small, and a great number of folks still work remotely. Certainly on Fridays, for the past 3 years it has just been me in the office. But last Friday I had the fright of my life.

I was dressed in a male T-shirt, and was just wearing a skirt and panties...blissfully working along when suddenly a co-worker came in through the hallway. When she dissapeared from view for not more than 10 seconds I quickly jumped into my jeans and sat back down. I'm sure my skirt was still showing and when she sat down at her desk I carefully began to tuck my skirt into my jeans.

We worked together in the office for another 3 hours or so and nothing was mentioned.

I don't know if she saw or not. I just don't know. But I'm scared. Very worried about what she saw (if anything).

My list of places where I can dress safely is getting so low now. I don't know what to do. And at this particular point in my life...the pink fog is insatiable.

I feel like the walls are closing in around my femme side. And there's nothing I can do...

[bridget thronton]

Hope Monday is easier than you fear

[Bunty]

She may not have noticed.

She may not care.

She may be positive.

Fret not. 🙂

[Jolene Robertson]

Hi Leliani,

You know her, would she be the kind to even mention it if she did? She might even be supportive.

Wishing for the best outcome, let us know. Hopefully nothing was noticed.

[Debbie Denier]

Hi Leliani, I think nothing will be said even if you were seen . It would be embarrassing for her to say something . Wait and see what happens. Please let us know how you get on. Like you I have a non supportive wife and fully understand how you feel.

[Kris Burton]

Here's a thought...what if your co worker did see, and questions you, and you found that she was interested and supportive? Wouldn't it be freeing to find someone with whom you didn't feel you had something to hide?

I hope someday you can reopen the question with your wife too. Sneaking around is way too stressful.

[Tiffany355]

Never done it outside the home but it?s one of my favorite things to do. Simply walk around, do house work etc in a dress. 🤷🏻*♂️

[kimdl93]

My guess is that if she saw something she would have reacted at least with surprise, and most likely a question.

[alwayshave]

Leliani, My guess is if she did see you, she is questioning what she saw if it was just a couple of seconds.

[StephanieLake]

I would think if she saw and was going to say anything, she would have mentioned it during the 3 hours on Friday.

[Stephanie47]

Just be observant for non-verbal communication. Is there going to be a little smile and twinkling of the eye or scowl and frown. This is one of the perils of dressing or under dressing at work. I hope you did not stand up with your skirt stuffed into your jeans; kind of lumpy looking?

[JulieC]

"I have lived through a great many tragedies in my life...most of which never happened" (i.e., the horrible things that happened in your head are far worse than reality)

"Never take counsel of your fears" is another good quote.

Ok, she might have seen you. It's certainly possible. If she did, and hasn't said anything already, she probably won't. If she did, she might gossip. There's no way to know if she did see or not if she's not telling you. You may never know if she saw or not, even if gossip started. Take a deep breath, and stop worrying about it. There is literally NOTHING you can do about it now. I try not to worry about things that I can't change (easier said than done at times, I know).

[docrobbysherry]

So, she MAY have seen something sticking out of your jeans if she even took the time to look and notice?

But, was it a skirt, an undergarment, or another shirt under your T? Don't u think if she cared she would have asked?:straightface:

U have enuff REAL dressing problems to worry about without making them up in your mind!:heehee:

[Fiona_44]

Leliani, in all probability she didn't see anything. On Monday, do not let your fear get the best of you. Do not keep looking at her to try & detect signs that anything is out of the ordinary. That will be noticed & raise suspicions. Just act as you do on an ordinary workday.

[Paulie Birmingham]

so will you be doing that at work again? the thrill of getting caught is exciting but not without consequences.

i enjoy the thrill but would not push the boundaries at work. i need my job

[Mackem Sue]

COVID created a situation where work from home allowed for ample crossdressing time. Basically, on work from home days (still two days a week), I dress as a girl. These days, I dress whenever I can.

Internet issues mean most people on video conference opt for audio only. Yup, we know where this is going.

I'm normally very careful to ensure Google Meet is locked down to ensure I can't be seen. However, we've odd managers who insist the video is on.

I'd had one of these meetings, so it was top half male (though I kept the bra on - not visible), though it was still skirt, hosiery and heels below the waist.

The problem was I had another meeting shortly after. While I set the meeting to audio only, I hadn't set the default.

So everything had gone okay and everyone was saying bye bye. I went for audio and accidentally hit video. There was only me and a senior line manager on. She saw me full on in wig and femme top.

She just grinned for the few seconds or so it took me to drop out of the meeting, but too late.

Nothing has been said and I think the one reason I got away with it was she's a fully out lesbian and active in the LGBTQ+ community. Otherwise, it would probably have been guts for garters.

She's been okay with me since and I think it's matters closed. That said, I have two other male work colleagues, one bi curious and one in another group fully gay and with a liking for crossdressing. So I as straight trans am probably on the mild end of the scale.

Sue

[leliani]

**UPDATE**

First of all I have to say thank you to you ALL for your amazing support. It means a lot, and I wish you all the very best of karma. Thank you so SO much.

So today being Monday was obviously my first day back. I'm 90% sure now that she did see something. And I was in the middle of putting my Jeans back on...I'm thinking she's concluded one of two things:
1) I was masturbating or something at work.
2) She saw my pink skirt and knew I was crossdressing.

Frankly I think 2) is better.

Things definitely seemed 'cool' today. In the morning she barely spoke to me at all, but as the day progressed she asked for some help with some work stuff which I was more than happy to do. I definitely tried to play it off like nothing happened. But deep down I feel like she did see.

What's really freaked me out is that at the end of the day she went home like 30 minutes early. We typically walk back to the parking lot together with another guy from my firm. So I'm not sure if she actually had to leave early to go do something or if she is still freaked out by what I think she saw.

I'm guess I'm just going to keep on going like nothing happened and hope that she's able to do the same. I guess at this point...there is really nothing more I can do.

[docrobbysherry]

Sounds like your brain is working over time!:doh:

I bet in time you'll find out it's nothing!:thumbsup:

[SaraLin]

If she saw - she saw. There's nothing you can do about that.

About all you can do is carry on as usual - as if nothing out of the ordinary happened. Just be your usual charming (right?) self and wait and see what happens.

-or-

if her 'cool' behavior continues, you could take a moment to ask her if there's something wrong, and if you can help.
It might be totally unrelated to what you think it is.
She might deny any issues and even respond that she's wondering why YOU have been acting weird.
OR - she might say that she saw you, and is (fill in the blank) about it. If this happens, be ready with an answer. something like "sorry about that, its something I do in private. I didn't mean for you to see it."

My suggestion is:
Don't act guilty or ashamed. She'll take her cue from your reactions. If it's a big deal to you, it'll be a big deal to her. If you act like it's equivalent to being caught with your fly undone (an "oops" moment), she'll likely pick up on that too.

The possibility exists that she's one of the totally intolerant type, but I think that if that were the case, she'd have made a big stink about it by now.

I believe that it's probably nothing and you'll be fine, if you can keep from freaking out and overanalyzing every little thing she says or does - looking for clues.

[Genifer Teal]

I live by the thought that your actions will help dictate their actions. Your sudden reaction and nervousness about getting caught could cause them to have an uneasy reaction to what may have not mattered in the first place. If I was the other person, my thoughts may have gone from, Did I see a skirt? To, What was he doing?

[Aunt Kelly]

Caught? Were you doing something wrong/illegal?

If you aren't prepared to be discovered, why are you tempting fate like that?

[Mackem Sue]

Further to my previous reply, like others' comments if she was going to do anything then it would have happened by now. It looks as though she's taken the line that it's none of her business.

That said, some move going forward so you're not going to be in such regular contact is perhaps a good idea as this would avoid a potential heat of moment situation where she blurts it out should there be a clash.

Such a change may just you not working in the same office area or team at some point in the future.

Sue.

[leliani]

**UPDATE 2**

So today was much better. We talked and chatted away like we usually do. And we walked back to the parking lot together like we usually do. I am still convinced that she saw me dressed in my skirt. And I guess there's nothing I can do about that.

She's totally awesome and we've always got on well together. So I'm hoping she'll just continue as if nothing happened, and I'll do the same.

But this does of course mean that I now have no opportunities to dress. So I don't know if this is the end of my crossdressing, or if I can figure something else out. Certainly I don't want it to be. I dunno.

[ColleenCD]

Leliani, glad your friendship is renewed. Time has a way of reducing the emotional impacts of events. Should she bring it up in the future, it would be supportive. Either way, your dressing time and space is now minimized, so as long as it matters to you, weigh your risks carefully. Very best wishes

[Kitty Sue]

It sounds as though things are going better than you feared. No matter what I am rooting for you as are many others. Perhaps some hotel/motel time is something you could do every few months. Not ideal but at least a private space where you can dress discreetly without fear of getting caught.

[Debra Russell]

question ...... why did you react the way you did ? It would have been better if she saw you wearing a skirt than being all nervous and acting as though you were caught doing something not so despicable....................Debra