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View Full Version : Do you change the pitch of your voice when dressed in public?



Heather76
07-31-2022, 10:28 PM
I didn't want to hijack Barbara Jo's thread (The more you interact with others); but, some comments make me want to ask a question. There were a couple comments about speaking in a softer tone. My question is how many of you are actually able to adjust your voice (pitch) to sound feminine? My natural voice is absolutely as deep a bass as a person can be. There is no way on earth I could ever disguise my voice as anything other than 100% male. Thus, I expect there is no point in even trying. I do understand about speaking in a softer tone such that my voice isn't loud and overbearing. But, other than that, if I were spoken to my response, regardless of how passable I looked, would be a dead giveaway. Is that the experience of most others? Just curious.

azncd
07-31-2022, 11:41 PM
There's quite a few trans girls that teach voice feminization techniques. They're quite difficult and take basically full time effort over a couple of years to get right, but the results are amazing. I try when I'm alone in my car, but there's still a lot of bass, or it sounds fake... But what I've noticed is a lot of women have really bassy voices as well, and they're just able to own it. It's more about inflection, tone, and vocabulary as much as the actual timbre too.

Basically though, even though it's very limited in it's success, I try to speak from my throat more than my gut if that makes sense. Then I try to practice the pressure that I push out with (which is what I think you're referring to), and a combination sort of helps a little.

docrobbysherry
08-01-2022, 01:04 AM
I practiced my girl voice for weeks before my first trans meeting 15+ years ago. Which was 1/2 way between my regular voice and a falsetto!

When I got there everyone was speaking in their male voice. So, I forgot about it! Since then, I've met countless T's. The ones with fem voices I can count on the fingers of one hand!:battingeyelashes:

Helen_Highwater
08-01-2022, 04:55 AM
Heather,

Certainly softening your voice is one option however it's not something you can do straight out of the box so to speak. Like learning to walk femme it takes a bit of practice. talking aloud to yourself while around the house or driving helps to get some "Muscle memory" and makes it easier to switch when out.

I've written this so many times. I once spoke with a speech therapist at a CD support group. She said the biggest mistake we make is to talk falsetto, a bit like a BeeGee on helium. Her advice was to find your natural "C" note and sing Doh and then go up to ray or Mi. One of those two is all you need to go accompanied by yes speaking a little softer but also altering your speech rhythms. Women are more lyrical in their conversations.

Ask a man the time and he'll say "Err one 'o clock". A woman will say something along the lines of; "Ooo, just let me see, Oh it's just coming up to one, time for some lunch I think". I suppose men have interactions, women have conversations is the best way I can put it.

Davina2833
08-01-2022, 05:04 AM
Doc,

Great avatar...

Davina

alwayshave
08-01-2022, 06:45 AM
I attempt to speak more softly, but otherwise it is me.

Krisi
08-01-2022, 07:25 AM
Ask a man the time and he'll say "Err one 'o clock". A woman will say something along the lines of; "Ooo, just let me see, Oh it's just coming up to one, time for some lunch I think". I suppose men have interactions, women have conversations is the best way I can put it.

Definitely! A woman will say ten words to a man's one word to convey the same information. Learning this will be more difficult than learning to change your pitch.

If one is going to actually live as a woman, it would be critical to learn to speak like a woman, both in pitch and in what you say and how you say it.

As a crossdresser, it would be nice if I could do that, but I can't and I will not put forth the effort to learn. What I do is try to avoid people and potential conversations as much as possible. I'm not going to bars and restaurants as Krisi or even shopping in retail stores.

Kris Burton
08-01-2022, 07:36 AM
I've experimented with this, and I think it's not so much a matter of pitch but more a placement of the voice, and a gentler manner of speaking for the most part. Lots of women have husky voices, not necessarily high ones. Note the scene in "Tootsie" when Dustin Hoffman is trying to hail a cab as a woman, getting nowhere and then reverting to his harsher male voice to get results - something like that I think. I have not tried this publicly b/c I am not out publicly, but I have been convincing using this technique with persons on the phone - got a "ma'am and everything!

I think a vocal coach might be able to tell you with more specificity what I'm talking about here - any out there?

BobbiKay
08-01-2022, 08:28 AM
I'm a baritone. I find that, even in drab, my voice pitch tends to rise when I am talking to a woman. And my wife takes offense when I "giggle like a girl", as she puts it.
I sometimes try to practice raising my pitch in the car, singing along to the radio. But I'll never be a Bee Gee.

kimdl93
08-01-2022, 08:44 AM
Yes. I have a natural tenor voice, and shift up a bit. Also, I used the Eva voice app for practicing my talking and singing voice. I thought it helped a great deal in attaining a more consistent female voice.

RoxieChristine
08-01-2022, 09:08 AM
I tried to do more of a girl voice since I've started. A couple weeks ago I started trying a pitch app that registers your average speaking frequency and labels it male, androgynous, or female. I was shocked to see I was still in the male range, I was hearing it higher. With work, I've gotten to where I can pretty much hit the female range consistently. I'm really struggling with the softness part now. I tend to project my voice and it carries a lot. Trying to turn that down a notch or two

Fiona_44
08-01-2022, 04:08 PM
Heather,

When I started going out in public I tried a soft female voice but my speech was very "breathy" and so low people had trouble hearing me. It was a disaster. Now, I speak in my male voice but try & speak slower and in just a slightly higher tone than usual. It works for short conversations but anything longer and I usually just use my male voice.

JohnH
08-01-2022, 04:14 PM
For me to sound.like.a genetic woman is a lost cause with my voice bordering on basso profundo. My speaking voice pitch is around 90 Hz. Early in the morning sometimes it is 70 Hz.
I look like a genetic woman with my usual dress, hair past the shoulders, and a bust. My deep voice doesn't seem th phase anybody, so I don't alter my voice pitch.

Cheryl T
08-01-2022, 04:43 PM
I try, but I don't think I succeed. Actually getting to the point where I really don't care anymore.

Joanne108
08-01-2022, 06:13 PM
A little bit softer and more drawn out!

char GG
08-01-2022, 08:16 PM
Unless you really get some type of voice training and practice, I don't think it's easy. Some people think speaking softer is more fem but I can tell you from experience with my hubby's social group, that most waiters and SA's may not hear your and keep asking "what?" until you just have to use a regular voice.

Also, don't end up sounding like Minnie Mouse.

TheHiddenMe
08-01-2022, 08:52 PM
Kind of?

With people I don't know, I will sometimes soften it.

With those I know, I just speak in my normal voice.

I have to remind my GG friends that when we go to the loo together, I'm not likely to talk or answer their questions, because others might wonder why they are hearing a man's voice in the ladies room. They tell me they forget because they just hear Dee's voice.

Heather76
08-01-2022, 08:59 PM
"... if I were spoken to my response, regardless of how passable I looked, would be a dead giveaway. Is that the experience of most others?"
It would seem to me the consensus is there is no point in trying to change one's voice and most of the responders, if not all, don't attempt to do so. That's kind of what I figured which gives me hope for the day I do actually interact with others. Thanks for the responses.

Geena75
08-01-2022, 09:12 PM
I have avoided situations where I would have to talk when out dressed up. I have done some practicing raising the pitch and timbre of my voice, and it does sound distinctly different (tried talking as part of some videos I took) but am dubious it really works. The one time I spoke, I knew I had been made before I made a sound, but still received a compliment on how I looked.

Debs
08-01-2022, 09:28 PM
my voice isnt so bad, its my walk I change when Im out, maybe doesent work, but hell it makes me feel better

Helena
08-01-2022, 10:25 PM
I don't think I have a very deep voice anyway, so I just soften it a bit more. It seems to work OK when people are looking at me, but it falls apart on the phone. I can often hear our tenants are taken aback when they ask for Helena and I say "that's me", there is a pause and I can almost hear the "cogs whirring".

JohnH
08-02-2022, 01:59 AM
"because others might wonder why they are hearing a man's voice in the ladies room."
I always use the men's restroom as I have the plumbing of a man, and have XY chromosomes. I DO make noises with my voice so other men don't think I'm a woman.

Jillian Faith
08-02-2022, 07:06 AM
I try, but I don't think I succeed. Actually getting to the point where I really don't care anymore.

I try as well, my late wife would say my voice passed, but I have my doubts. Unlike Cheryl I do care and would love to sound more female/feminine when out dressed.

SaraLin
08-02-2022, 07:09 AM
I've been told that my voice changes when I'm fully in Sara mode. I'll take their word for it, but I wasn't trying to "fake it' or anything, so...??

AllieBellema
08-02-2022, 03:34 PM
I try to talk in a softer tone when I'm en femme, but I doubt it passes because I also have a deep voice. Of course, when I'm around others that know me and accept me I don't bother trying a different voice.

April Rose
08-02-2022, 07:15 PM
I worked hard for a long time to get to the point where I could raise my pitch at will. I can do it fairly comfortably. The problem now is remembering to do it.

It may seem like a simple social interaction, but in reality there are so many things going on that it's near impossible to get it to come out as we wish it would.

Think of being expected to perform a concert on an instrument you've barely learned to play.

Patience
08-02-2022, 08:36 PM
I don't make a conscious effort to change anything, as it would probably sound forced and a little silly.

I just try to talk naturally. If it sounds more fem, it's due to a subconscious organic process.

Barbara Jo
08-02-2022, 08:52 PM
Speaking softer is one thing that we have to do.

There is one thing that a TS taught me years ago......
Tighten your throat slightly as if you were about to gargle and speak. This will will automatically raise your voice pitch a bit without resorting to an awful falsetto.

Karren H
08-02-2022, 10:04 PM
I try to talk softer but my fem voice really sucks!

Genifer Teal
08-03-2022, 08:47 AM
I did for a while. Eventually, like most things, it became my new normal as I slowly evolve.

Debbie Denier
08-03-2022, 09:13 AM
That is my fear of going out in public. My voice is a dead giveaway.

NjJamie
08-03-2022, 09:53 AM
Debbie, don't let that stop you! I found myself at a Panera which suddenly got busy so I sat quietly and finished my meal. Just before the last bites the manager came by to ask how my meal was and how the service went. I had no out and just spoke a bit quietly, everything was great, and she continued without even a hint of a reaction. Please get out there if that's what you want to do, the water is awesome!

CynthiaD
08-03-2022, 03:10 PM
Yes, I do. I have no trouble pitching my voice high.

JohnH
08-03-2022, 04:10 PM
Debbie, I talk with my masculine bass voice while wearing a dress, hair below my shoulders, and bust, resembling a genetic woman, and nobody seems to notice. So I say don't worry about the voice. By the way, I'm the only true bass in my church's choir as I mentioned before.

Julia B
08-04-2022, 05:41 AM
Raising my pitch slightly, along with softening it and changing to female patterns is something I try to do and is important for me to feel as feminine as possible when dressed.

Kris Burton
08-04-2022, 09:30 PM
Thinking about this thread, I ran across this video today. I found it quite amusing, and it goes far to explain what I was talking about in #8 - the importance of voice placement in addition to pitch - in a far more articulate way than I could. I found the voice change quite striking.

https://youtu.be/aiFgbyEQY_o