Why do you crossdress?

[P_Alexis]

I have been asked by my wife since she has found out. Why do I cross dress? She thinks I want to dress as a woman all the time. That is not the case. I enjoy dressing en femme about three times a week. On the weekends I'm normally en femme in the morning until we have to run errands. I do it once during the work week in which I go to a local bar in full dress & makeup to have a couple drinks & enjoy myself. For me it's a fulfillment. I feel it makes me feel whole meaning the part of me that was missing for the longest time. I now find myself getting a little excited but not over excited. It makes me feel younger than what I am, currently 51 turning 52 this year. All my reasons to her are too vague. I'm trying to better explain myself to help her, so she accepts my cross dressing. What are your reasons?

[Kris Burton]

When i first came out to my wife, she asked the same question of me. I rather inarticulately bumbled through an answer, trying to describe the sensuous, euphoric feelings, living in the moment, etc. At one point she stopped me and said "Oh, you want to feel sexy!" I knew then she got it, and we were going to be OK.

[CarlaWestin]

So, they can see that it fills a desire and still have to ask.
I think they need a reassurance that they are not the cause.
Could she have possibly been hinting why so much?

[GretchenM]

Not everybody crossdresses for the same reason. Using a generalization that is way too generalized, we do it because it expresses the way we feel. Now that needs to be tied down better. The expression "I feel like a woman" ties it down a tad better. It is a motivation to dress in a way that matches the sense of self.

But that is only for those that lean more toward transgender. For crossdressers who do not feel that identity shift it may be sexual or it may just because they like the look and feel of women's clothes which are usually more colorful and comfortable than is often the case with men's clothes. Perhaps the message here is that there is no single reason that fits all, but many reasons that tend to be pretty individualized.

But if she accepts your crossdressing that is a big plus and not the usual pattern. Most women take a long time to reach the point of acceptance and I suspect a majority don't really get to that point. You are fortunate.

[Teresa.Smith.VA]

The reasons why I enjoy cross dressing evolved over time, but I have always been totally honest about sharing those reasons with my wife. It's fair to say that we evolved together, which had the benefit of her understanding and full support. In many cases, my wife was able to help me understand my own compulsions before I was able to fully understand it.

The lesson learned was that the more I shared, the more support and participation I received. Of course many wives simply can not and will not even try. There are many understandable reasons for that which many times results in a DADT accommodation.

I pinch myself every day that I am one of the lucky ones who enjoys the high level of acceptance from my wife, which results in lots of fun time for us both, instead of conflict, misunderstanding, and hurt feeling.

[Teri Ray]

For me, I am not sure there is a good answer to this question. Might as well try to answer any similar question like "why do you like chocolate" or "why do you like sports" or "why do you the music you listen to". Some things in life are just personal preferences that really have no logical explainaiton. I suffered with trying to understand why I have this desire and never found an answer that makes sense. Once I gave up this effert to understand and just accepted my desire, life became easier. I enjoy my time enfemme and I am OK with not having the answer as to why I do. Once I accepted that my desire to dress does not make me a bad person the struggle to understand why left me.

I also like steamed broccolli with butter and parmesan cheese on top. I still don't know why? Maybe you girls can help me solve that question.

[Maid_Marion]

I find socialization intuitively obvious presenting female while it is awkward as a guy.

Marion

[AmeeJo]

Nothing makes me feel sexier than being dressed as a woman. I love the rush and the feeling of euphoria I feel when I am dressed. I am slowly expanding my experiences outside of my private comfort zone and so far it has been wonderful!! I am finding lots of acceptance as well as assistance from the limited exposure to my femme life out of the home.

[alwayshave]

Alexis, as my forum name states I always have. I stopped questioning why a long time ago.

[Stephanie47]

My wife asked this question during "The Talk." I fumbled around trying to come up with some plausible answer. I had to admit to her, "I do not know why I do what I do!" I my mind there is a difference between how I may feel when I am wearing women's clothing and the motivation to do it in the first place. Why would a man risk all the negative consequences society heaps on cross dressers? Why not some other outlet? Why repeat the activity once it blows up in a guy's face? Some can easily suppress the desire while other are constantly haunted by it.

A counselor I see for combat related PTSD issues is of the opinion that each man or woman has some dna of the opposite gender within him or her. In some it is greater than others. I hang around with a combat support group of old guys. I am the sole guy who has not medicated with drugs and alcohol. In the past when I wanted to "escape" the demons of war, it was seeking calmness and serenity wearing women's attire brought on. That still does not explain why I as a single digit male child felt compelled wear my wear my mother's clothing.

[kimmy p]

I prefer the clothes. I like feminine clothing. I actually look much better in make up and body shapers. A big part is that men's clothing is BORING. Women have a much larger choice of looks available to them. From style itself (dress, skirts, blouses, pantsuit, etc) to colors and patterns.

[Cheryl T]

After decades of dressing and asking myself this question I still haven't found an answer.
The only thing I can say is that it just feels right and makes me feel a way I have never felt any other way.

[Jodi79]

It's as simple as this for me. Girl clothes are much prettier than guys, feel a lot better on my body and I am so much more comfortable in them. I may not look good in them but I love how cute the clothes are and how I feel wearing them. I am a straight male, think of myself as cis-male and have no desire to transition or pretend to be female. Just love the clothes.

Like others have said - there are so many different reasons why folks dress.

[Ann Simpson]

I remember two instances from my pre-grade school days. My mother, who was raised in a family of girls, had bought me these briefs that the front was like a pair of boxers and same material and the back was a regular brief. I hated those. I begged mom to buy me regular underpants. Not until these get worn out or too small. So I started damaging them. tried to cut them with a pocket knife. Mom caught me--I told her I hated those. She sweet talked me and conned me again.
The second time we were in Woolworth's, she and I --- For whatever reason we were in the women's department. Remember how those bins or tables with glass dividers and panteis sorted by sizes? Mom was looking at something. In my mind I'm thinking bras, but I am probably projecting. I was standing by a center bin of panties. Some of them were colored. I was fascinated by a pair of yellow nylon panties. they looked so smooth and pretty compared to what I was wearing.
I knew there was no way Mom would buy them for me...no, now, almost 65 years later I suspect she might have if I would have asked. I thought about stealing them...but I'm a catholic and I just knew I'd walk out of the store with them in my pocket and get hit by a truck and go straight to hell Nope shoplifting was out. I'm standing there looking at them when a woman comes up and starts looking through the panties.
After this I confined my panty feelings to looking at catalogues. When I was 13 I bought a 3 pack at Shopper's Fair. I told the cashier I was buying them for my girlfriend. I don't understand why I like dressing in women's clothing, I just feel better when I do.

[OrdinaryAverageGuy]

Why do you build a racecar in your garage? Why do you play guitar? Why do you learn to fly? Why do you learn to sew? Why do you bake amazing things? Why do you sculpt your hedges? Why do you wear dresses? Why do you............

Because you like to.

[Fiona_44]

My answer is like Teri Ray's - I really don't know why I dress. What i do know however is that once I gave up being ashamed at my dressing and stopped trying to understand why I did it, I truly accepted my being a cross dresser and quickly blossomed into dressing fully and going out in public en femme.

[Debbie Denier]

I don?t know why but I like it. Think thats from a song but its true.Early days there was a sexual element. These days it is how it makes me feel which is good.It is a form of escapism and relaxation, When I dress I feel that I can forget all my worries.

[countrygirl]

Why not. I look into the mirror and I see a female looking back. It is me.

[IwishIwasTracy]

I have done it my whole life. So wearing female clothing just feels natural. My wife and I have been having a lot of discussions about my dressing lately. If I can relate it to something she is interested in she seems willing to listen and try and understand. Last week we talked about dopamine and how as a young person I probably got a dopamine charge out of putting on my sister's clothes and that has carried over to today. That made sense to her.

Tracy

[Mackem Sue]

I don't know.

Resisting it made me miserable. Purging made me feel worse and those days are over. Accepting it made me feel better about myself. I've done it since I was a child and it isn't just going to go away. I feel better in women's clothes than men's.

It's compulsive, addictive and enjoyable. And unlike other addictions, it doesn't harm your health. That's unless you twist your ankle when wearing heels. :)

Some women present more en femme and some not. It appears to be the same for us crossdressers.


Sue

[Steph_CD_62]

I've asked myself this question several times over the years.
When I first started wearing women's clothing it was during my teenage years, and I used them more for a fetish thing than anything else.
I have evolved over the years and now wearing women's clothing just relaxes me. I love the different styles, colors and fabrics that women's clothing offers.

[Heather76]

My wife has asked me why. I honestly do not know why I cross dress. What I do know is what the results of my crossdressing are. I feel 100% calm. I feel 100% comfortable. I feel 100% at ease. I don't have a care in the world. I enjoy the feel and softness of the clothing. Wearing a bra and forms allows me to enjoy a lifelong boob fetish even when by myself. The feel of nylons hugging my legs is wonderful. There is simply nothing about CDing I don't enjoy other than my wife wondering what is wrong with me.

[Davina2833]

Heather,

You took the words right out of my mouth. I feel exactly the same way.
Especially your last part, "There is nothing about CDing I don't enjoy other than
my wife wondering what is wrong with me"

Truer words never spoken.

Davina

[prene]

I am not sure and have discussed this with my therapist.

Initially it was a sexual excitement thing. Not really any more.

I do feel sexy when I dress as a woman. I do love feminine clothing so much more fun and soft.

I wish they were not so expensive. lol

Male clothing is boring

[ShirleyN]

I absolutely agree with everything you said prene. You really and honestly can't get away from the sexual element to CDing. Same goes for me and no doubt many others as well. I would also add that womens clothes also have a much wider variety in terms of overall designs and patterns as well.

[kimdl93]

Why? When I am dressed and look in the mirror, I see my real self. The male is less recognizable. That of course begs the question, of why yet again, and that gets into some very murky and unresolved questions about genetics/epigenetic, birth order, social influences etc.

My guess is that your wife is not asking for a list of possible biological or sociological contributing factors. My guess is she is asking your personal reasons for choosing to cross dress. Any answer you give will be legitimate and at the same time probably unsatisfactory. Your answers were that you felt, enjoyment, excitement, younger, fulfillment (feeling whole). I suppose the follow up question is, but why do you feel any of those things, which as others have pointed out, it like asking a person why they like Limburger cheese or running a marathon (I know, its crazy, but some people actually enjoy running!)

Perhaps the key is in that term, “fulfillment”. As you said, dressing and going out as a woman makes you feel whole. That suggests/implies that it fills something that is otherwise not satisfied by male gender identity, that a part of your identity is female and needs expression (lets skip over causal factors entirely).

Humans like easy, either/or answers. But we aren’t that simple.

[AllieBellema]

I do it to let out a happier side of me. I do tend to smile more when I look in the mirror at myself after I dress up and see myself all feminine and pretty. For my mental health, that turns into a good thing. And I agree that male clothing is just boring compared to what women get to wear!

[Jacqueline Vivaldi]

I cross dress because I want to look and feel like a female in every possible way. It is now a joy. I love to get fully dressed and look elegant and pretty, even alone at home, but I do enjoy walking down a street or into a restaurant and have some people compliment me on my outfit. This was not always the case. In the early days, I purged many times and felt bad, but then I came to the realization that this is who I am naturally. After this mental process of self analysis many years ago, I always feel special when I am stylishly outfitted. Life is just beautiful.

[DeeDee67]

I gave my wife a pair of my boxer briefs to try on and automatically she said No! End of that discussion. She realized that most mens clothing is uncomfortable. That answered the clothing issue but not the makeup which she can't stand. Sometimes a little mascara or eye shadow but not full on makeup. My wife has gotten use to my panty w wearing/dresses,bras and my long hair but not the makeup.

[NancySue]

Like others, both my wife and I have asked this question many times. I really don?t know. I just know I do and have since early childhood. Pink fog? The one constant fact is how comfortable dressing is for me and that includes underwire bras, especially hose, etc. My wife doesn?t understand how I find these items comfortable, but I do. We accept it as part of our lives. Her support is so appreciated. Being retired, I dress daily and enjoy the whole process of selection, dressing, sights and smells. After a workout or outside chores, nothing beats a shower, shaved legs, lubricate and slipping on hose, fresh lingerie, etc.

[sometimes_miss]

Rather than repeatedly write out the same material over and over, perhaps just peruse the previous threads, so here are two from the past month or so, alone. Here are a lot of answers for you:
https://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?278845-why-we-started-crossdressing

https://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?279013-My-question-of-quot-why-quot

Those two alone, will supply you with lots of thought provoking information!

[Jessica Secret]

For me it's my love of beautiful lingerie, wanting to feel fem and the desire to look and feel like a woman for not only myself but also for my boyfriend. Slipping into lingerie relaxes me and takes away any stress I have in my life.

[Misty_cder]

For me, the "why do I dress" has become a way to relax from the stresses of work. I enjoy the feeling of the fabrics and find the styles to be more comfortable than men's clothing. Sometimes all I want to do is put on a simple outfit (blouse and jeans), then there are times I want to get fulling done (makeup, forms, wig, etc.) I have to admit when I first started dressing, it was as a fetish, but over time it has become a part of my everyday wardrobe with items such as panties and bras. Thankfully my wife (girlfriend at the time when I came out to her 30 years ago) is supportive.

[marieclaire]

I think women's clothes are prettier than men's. I love wearing bras, panties and pantyhose.

[CynthiaD]

I never get tired of answering this question. I crossdress for many reasons. Here are a few.

1. Despite what it says on my birth certificate, I'm female. Always have been.
2. Yeah, I want to wear female clothing all the time.
3. When I look in the mirror, sometimes I see a man, sometimes I see a woman. The woman is me. I don't know the man.
4. It's hard to put into words, but when I see the woman in the mirror, I know why I do it. Words are unimportant.
5. When I pick out my outfit for the day, the only question in my mind is skirt or dress?
6. My male outfit is (like) a uniform. When I get home, I take off the uniform and put on my normal female clothing, which I typically lay out on my bed before leaving.
7. When I go clothes shopping, I head for the women's section. I don't know where the men's section is.
8. I feel naked without a bra.
9. I also feel naked without lipstick, dangle earrings, and a necklace.

Yes, I could wear male clothing 24/7. But why would I want to?

These are more personal feelings than reasons. But my personal feelings are my reasons.

To paraphrase something I heard on a TV show: if you're a crossdresser, no explanation is necessary. If you're not, no explanation is possible.

[MarinaTwelve200]

To "Take a "vacation" from myself. And in doing so , becoming completely someone else free from my own worries and responsibilities--even of "manhood" itself, and thus am able to relax and "UNWIND" entirely.---- and also with the "bonus of "feeling pretty" and turning myself "on". I need a good CD "fix" every two or 3 weeks or so.

[Angela Marie]

I’ve always had a very strong feminine side. Dressing allows me to express that fully.

[Barbara Jo]

Personally, I just really enjoy feeling feminine and this includes wearing female clothes.

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Alexis :hugs:, I have been dressing for 75 years Now,

It is just who I am and It's just what I do, >Orchid**O:daydreaming:O**

[Jillcder]

Great question all I know is there is nothing remotely close the feeling I get when i put on a dress and spend the day shopping. I would love to hear what explanation helps your wife accept your dressing I still after over 40 years of marriage to an incredible women cannot find the courage to have the talk.

[Geena75]

The great element of this thread is that you will get such a diversity of reasons. Then you just explore those that strike a chord with you. For me, there is the tactile aspect -- the clothes just feel remarkable. Then there is the escapist aspect, particularly if I go out somewhere dressed, a vacation from myself. In the final analysis, I do it because I enjoy it and it's FUN. One might as well ask why I like to have a root beer now and then.

[Raychel]

I have always been very self-concious about myself.
About my manner of talk, about my looks, and about my actions.
All stemming from my childhood.

Here it is some 50 years later and those scars are still there.

When I crossdress, I feel when I look in the mirror, that image would be right.
it gives me a huge escape from myself.
and since I only do it alone,
I don't have to be concerned with my thoughts actions or words.

not sure if that makes and sense. but that is what best fits my thinking

[Lacey New]

I wish I knew. I have been trying to find the answer for multiple decades and I still don?t know. My own personal theory is that I trained myself to enjoy it. It started out as a sexual fetish and that was the principal drive. Like a heroin addict, I needed more feminine clothing to achieve the same sexual rush. It was a wonderful experiment to see myself in various lingerie and a few different outfits and things probably hit a peak shortly after I retired and my wife was still working. Since then, however, she retired and there has been a decline in both the urge and the opportunity but is still like to wear my pretty things from time to time. I guess for me, it is simply a matter of conditioning.

[Brenda Freeman]

I asked why for years. I went to a transformation service in 2005. With full make up, a wig, breast forms, lingerie painted nails nylons and heels I felt amazing. When I looked in the mirror I saw a lovely woman. That was it. I like looking like a woman and feeling feminine. I always looked at women in pretty dresses and skirts all made up and loved the look. I dress up to look like a woman. And it makes me happy beyond description.

[DianeT]

Because it's the closest thing to exploring a new planet and takes so much less money and time to do.
And because it's wonderfully, unbelievably freeing. I don't walk when I dress. I fly.

[Kelli_cd]

I so want to experience this! I think I would just float everywhere I went.

Of course, floating would take a little away from wearing heels...

[Patience]

To get in touch with a part of me I can't reach otherwise.

To experience life more fully.

To try to somewhat break the script that goes through the average person's head when they come across a 6'2" black man walking on the street.

[Paula_56]

Ask a woman, Why do you like to wear women's clothes?

There's your answer.

[RachelB.]

The only reason for me is because I enjoy it. I also enjoy fishing, hunting and a multitude of other things. I don't question why I do them either.

[Tamroi]

Please see "Crossdress for Peace."

- - - Updated - - -

It's not because I want to look female, I have a beard, though my interests have always been like hugging girls instead of combat. Except for my breasts I look male. That's fine. Adornment is the primary art. It's always been a main delight for me. Women's clothing is anything. Clothes now meant for men are incredibly dumb and boring.

[Natalie5004]

"I like smoking my cigar but I take it out of my mouth once in a while."

[jacques]

I cross-dress because ... it just seems the natural thing to do.
I have stopped trying to understand it; I just do it.
My wife says "it's only clothes" and now I realize she is right.
luv J

[tbryant2k16]

Think some of it is jealously with the styles, print, fabric and other things female clothes have. Jealous that women can wear those items and men can't.

[DaniellaUK]

Because I'm a girl trapped in this hideous male body. Used to kid myself I simply liked female clothes. Oh my days x

[sometimes_me]

i know im not, but mostly to feel pretty and that makes me happy. simple as that

[Wendy me]

Why do i dress as a woman? Good question i even wear womens clothing in male mode being in fem is who i am its me i mean who gets up at 430 in the morning puts on a bra and a dress to take the dog out ? Me thats who i have a male mode that wears mens clothing but is wearing a bra panties hair curled and jewelry its me i dont get a rush or a thrill out of dressing i am Wendy that's who i am would i like to be Wendy permanently yes yes yes .. but for now not a option i own a lot more womes clothing than male clothing i pass ok for a mature woman ..

[crissy7]

I just love the feeling i have when wearing womens clothing.I have had these feelings since i was very young.Would not want to change it is who i really am.

[wendylovescd]

I don?t know why :). Somewhere there is a part of me that gets a charge out of wearing feminine things. Even if I dress partly a few times per week I feel more alive and I?ve noticed that sex with my wife is just better (I do not dress around my wife even though she is ok with it). If I?ve gone several weeks without dressing up, I notice an arousal difference. I have a rich and full male side that I wouldn?t trade, but the Wendy side seems to make the male me much better.

[SaraLin]

Because I'm a girl trapped in this hideous male body. Used to kid myself I simply liked female clothes. Oh my days x

I had to give a sad smile when I read this one because it strikes close to home.

I tend to think of myself as a girl born with a major birth defect (the male body). I've learned that dressing and acting like a man helps disguise the defect and make me more able to blend into the "normal" world. So - I've adapted, and that's what I do most of the time.

It's an odd way of looking at things though.

Now when I get some alone time, I dress in what I feel is appropriate for ME.

[crobeson96]

I bet we all enjoy reading these threads because we ask ourselves the same question internally from time to time. One sees the same answers but they never get old. Some responses I find difficult to identify with because they would not be valid when I started at a very young age, in secret, pre- any overt sexual feelings as it was before puberty.
Maybe the answer changes as we grow but I believe any long-term behavior must have rewards.

Dressing is a chance to lay one's constant burdens aside - it is a concrete way to physically distance oneself from the cares of day-to-day life and to don a complete persona that could not possibly be associated with all those problems and fears and memories of failure and hurt. None of that was why I did it the first time, though.

Most of us, nearly all, were nurtured and cared-for in the most intimate sense by women when we were children. Women therefore represent strength and safety and dressing like them is a way to identify and connect to what we admire and love in those special females with which we are most intimately associated. -Even and perhaps especially those women that might disagree vehemently with our desire and practice of crossdressing!

The element of eroticism we enjoy when dressed is inevitable (IMO!) even to those who self-report otherwise. We are wired deep as we go to find the whole aspect as well as the tiniest elements of femininity attractive. Dressing is a way to conjure a woman we have complete control over and who can say that about any other woman? The one in the mirror or reflected in a shop window always smiles back.

Hey this is all me LOL! Any pretense of universalism is unintentional other than I hope you enjoyed reading my comment. My perspective is that of heterosexual crossdresser and is not intended to represent the motivations of the many other kinds of persons born in a male body who find dressing in female clothing rewarding in some elemental way.

[JackieD]

It?s just feels good or right. Something that makes you relax, Actually why ? IDK. Just seems right

[Brianne_bc]

Because its part of my autism. Its a stim for me that feel really good. being hypertactile the feel of the clothes is very nice.

[Debs]

I love it, it feels natural, didnt used to was riddled with guilt for many years, but now embrace it, enjoy it, even my wife has given in trying to stop me, I go out regular and stay out overnight (with my wifes consent), I go shopping during the day, meet other girls I know, we go clubbing at night. I am now complete. The key was accepting that I couldnt defeat it, so enjoy it.

[Denice]

See my signature. it's what I tell myself. Or maybe it's just what was once a vice is now a habit.

[Tracy Irving]

Because I can.

It is fun, as well as a challenge, to coordinate outfits, find the right wig and apply makeup. I am always learning?

[ShirleyN]

Whenever i've dressed, Its mainly been for comfort and relaxation reasons but it's also because as others have already said, fun. I've actually been told by a woman who i used to dress up with, that my eye contact, apparently, improves when I'm dressed as well so there you go.

[KymG]

I have been asking myself that for years.

[fun4metoo2004]

Because it satisfies me. I feel some much more relaxed and enjoy the comments. So, besides the early erotic factor, I enjoy the ego stroking when asked about it.

[Karren H]

I have no reasons that I can verbalize to someone else or even to myself to explain why. It is just something I am driven to do.

[michelleddg]

Because I have special DNA. It ate me up through midlife but now I accept and just don't worry about it.

Hugs, Michelle

[Annajose]

I started trying female clothes and things when I was about 6, they sold some plastic finger tips that had long nails and the corner shop, they came with some candy, I used o get them and fantasize that they were mine, there was a time of playing with dolls with my sisters, then of course trying my mothers pantyhose and then shoes and well, 23 years later I married and did not know why I liked wearing feminine things. Yes I loved the feeling of the pantyhose, yes for some time it was highly erotic, but all that passed and I am still compelled to wear female clothes every day.
I used to smoke a lot, and I quit from one day to the other when my second daughter was born.
I used to bite my fingernails, and I stopped from one day to the other as well.
But I have tried to stop dressing and simply cannot, I no longer buy raunchy stuff, actually my wife jokes that my style of dressing is "grandmotherly" and I dont mind, if I can dress more by dressing more conservativelly, I am happy, I follow Stana's advise an try to dress my age, which, close to 60, is not sexy or raunchy.
So 50 something years later, I still don't know why do I crossdress, I know I am very lucky to have a wife that accepts me and loves me in spite of the crossdresing that her, the same as I, is unable to understand.

[Jennifer03]

When I am dressed. I look in the mirror and Jennifer is there, I smile. I don't do that in male clothes. All is at peace. That's why I do it.

[MarinaTwelve200]

Because it feels good to be "pretty" and it "detaches" me from myself---Allowing me to completely relax, unwind and de-stress. It is also a "creative outlet" where I get to experiment with changing my appearance and get an idea of how I might have looked had I been born a female.----That's WHY I do it. (Today , anyway)

[Kandi Robbins]

Pretty simple: it makes me happy!

Now why does it make me happy?

[Bea_]

The clothes and the styles that I choose tend to give me a sense of completeness. The drab side of my persona works well, as far as it goes. But, my feminine wardrobe seems to add something to my maleness and not take away.

[mbmeen12]

[/QUOTE]Nattelle5004 "I like smoking my cigar but I take it out of my mouth once in a while.[QUOTE].
That is an analogy I don't understand but ok....and as to the original post question, it accelerated with my ex who thought it was fun in bedroom ironically as to all things, I wanted more....dress for success etc..and it felt great.

[kateydoe]

Makes me happy, It just feels right to dress, I have different feelings when I?m Katey, puts me in my happy place. I just feel amazing!!! Oh I could go on?.

[Christina89]

To feel less stressed and escape this reality for a bit or a day. When I am Christina I am in a different reality. It's my escape. It's also a coping skill I use to help with PTSD.

[Maria 60]

I remember when I told my wife and about a year later she had come home from work and I was dressed and that wasn't something unusual. But this time for some reason I felt embarrassed that she had to see her husband dressed like a women and I started apologizing to her that she had to see me like that and deal with it and I just didn't understand what drives me to do it. That day she put everything in prospective for me, she asked me why I have so much guilt and that I wasn't really doing anything that bad. She told me instead of trying to figure it out or look to much into it why not just enjoy it when opportunity comes. I took her advice and it just seemed like I finally got a piece mind and as much as just like anything in a marriage it's not alway a smooth road but we worked at it together and made sure we were both happy with the situation.

[Barbara Jo]

Yeah... as Paula said, many (most?) females like to wear very feminine clothes at times.
No, not all the time but, just when the mood strike them or when a situation warrants it .
BTW, a bridal gown is usually the ultimate in a feminine dress and most females look forward to wearing it.
Some like to dress rather feminine all the time. while others just occasionally.

So, are we basically that much different ?

[Lucy B]

I just love how it makes me feel. It wasn?t always like that, it used to come with guilt attached.
Now it just feels natural and I feel very relaxed and comfortable

[NonbiNancy]

The element of eroticism we enjoy when dressed is inevitable (IMO!) even to those who self-report otherwise. We are wired deep as we go to find the whole aspect as well as the tiniest elements of femininity attractive. Dressing is a way to conjure a woman we have complete control over and who can say that about any other woman? The one in the mirror or reflected in a shop window always smiles back.

Hey this is all me LOL! Any pretense of universalism is unintentional other than I hope you enjoyed reading my comment. My perspective is that of heterosexual crossdresser and is not intended to represent the motivations of the many other kinds of persons born in a male body who find dressing in female clothing rewarding in some elemental way.

Thanks crobeson. I really like and resonate with what you wrote. That woman in the mirror... And yes it is erotic!

[Jade P]

I love too feel feminine, and dress feminine, because I am about 80 percent female in my mind and spirit.

[Diane P]

For about the last 20 years I've worn thong underwear off and on under my male clothing. Only started fully cross dressing, (dresses, shorts, tops for the shorts, nightgowns, bikini panties ect) in the last two months after my wife passed in July. Can't explain why I never tried cross dressing while my wife was alive except to say the thought never occured to me. After she passed I was headed to the store to buy some bikini panties for the first time and had a thought pop into my head "I wonder what I would look like dressed as a woman". That was immediately followed by "transforming Dean into Diane".

So besides buying several pair of bikini panties I bought a few dresses. Got home and decided to put on the panties and one of the dresses. That felt so wonderful and natural to be wearing women's clothes. As strange as it may sound I also discovered that I had a "female half", hence my use of Diane as my name in these forums. I'm not a woman trapped in a man's body I just feel that I have a feminine side that wanted to be able to express herself. Since 'discovering' that part of myself I feel complete, as if I was only half a person before.

For me I guess this all boils down to "I feel more comfortable, happier, natural and completely myself" when I'm wearing women's clothes. Of course I do it just at home. I have a beard and would really look strange in women's clothes in public. I might sometime decide to shave the beard so I can dress the way I feel and go out in public, but that will not be any time soon.

[Marcelo]

My reason is pretty shallow and a bit naughty: I'm turned on by seeing women getting caught flashing their panties ? especially in public media. I always knew that was embarrassing and wanted to experience it for myself.

That's all I think I should post about it...

[Misiokaku]

For me it is just about the optics/aesthetics. I just think women look better, they dress better have more options in dressing, styling and for me most importantly can do a lot more with their hair. I envy them for this and admire their looks. I don't want to be a woman, I just want those possibilities in hairstyling and dressing because i simply think women look better than guys. I try to look well as a guy too. But women just have more options.and i want those options for myself. I have thought about it for my whole life. The dressing part is not that important for me. The hair is. There are a lot of guys with beautifully styled hair in feminine styles. But it just looks better when the clothing matches. So this is my shallow reason it is just about the aesthetics of a woman wich I want for myself.

[Shiny]

I agree with Ann about the "boxer" shorts. Miserable things we were forced to wear in the USMC because they looked "manly." "Y" fronts weren't allowed. We were told men wear "trousers" and only girls and queers wear "pants." I thought it was funny because we had to wear elastic on our boots and roll up the cuffs of our trousers for that look that was called "blousing" and then the top jacket you wore was called a "blouse!" I thought a blouse was a woman's top. Anyway those boxer shorts were baggy and on long marches they wadded up and chafed you something awful, but by golly they were "Manly!" Another insane idea about clothing from the other-military-side. But why do I cross dress? Who the heck knows!? I am left handed and brown eyed, maybe it's in that mix somewhere. As always, I wish I wasn't one.

[Robin777]

I started dressing because I was attracted to the clothing when I was young. Why I dress now is because If I don't, I can't live with myself. I get real irritable and antsy when I don't dress for a while. Then when I dress my mood changes. I can live with myself again I do it to tame down something in me. Maybe my female side is pushing me to do it. I could never figure it out. All I know once I am dressed I feel better about myself. I do know I have always had thoughts that I wish I was born female. I am also left handed , Maybe that has something to do with my dressing.