Dressing vs being en Femme

[wendylovescd]

I am curious how many of you approach behaviors and things such as voice and make-up when dressing. Almost 90% of the time I'm just dressing feminely, but not really femme meaning just going about my normal day in heels, hosiery, dress but no wig, makeup, "shaping", or femme behaviors. Only time I add more is when I'm taking photos. It seems that others go further than this more often. Maybe I'm a lazy cross-dresser.... :-)

[kimdl93]

I get dressed and made up completely if I happen to be venturing out, which is typically several times a week. For everyday, around the house casual, I typically do a little eyeshadow, lipstick and a wig, just so I feel a bit more complete.

[Jennifer03]

Around the house I am more casual. Shorts, t-shirt/blouse, undergarments. No wig, makeup. That is all reserved for going out.

[Natalie5004]

For me either I dress fully or forget it. The process takes about 1 hour being careful with my makeup and eyelashes and all.

[Fiona_44]

Wendy,

I go out 4-5 times per week and its usually in a skirt, top, panties, bra, forms, wig, jewelry but the only make-up I wear is lipstick and occasionally concealer to soften the bags under my eyes. I wear sunglasses when outside & tinted glasses when inside to cover my eyes.

At home it usually just bra, forms & panties during the warm weather and I add a silky robe when its cooler. I don't bother with the wig, make-up or jewelry indoors.

[Territx]

I am with Natalie on this, it is either everything or nothing . . . though I have to admit that I am apparently not as proficient with makeup, etc. as I am almost always need "1hour+" to get ready!

[Erika_M]

Being new I've been commenting I'm mostly in mom jeans lol no fancy getups 😂 but I guess it's something to aspire to

[Kerry Michaels]

All or nothing.

[Debbie Denier]

Circumstances dictate the situation for me. Non accepting wife and 2 daughters at home restricts my activity. Hence grabbed moments fully dressed but no makeup up as too risky. Every little counts and something is always better than nothing.

[Paulie Birmingham]

i dress at home though no forms or wigs or much makeup. underdress plus a bit more when outside. never en femne.

[Kris Burton]

I tend to dress situationally. Sometimes I do makeup only if I am experimenting with an idea, and if I take an early morning walk en femme in my neighborhood it is usually without makeup, as it takes about an hour to do right. I just recently started venturing outside and I have done full makeup in those situations. I must take every advantage to appear more femme! But I've got to work on the voice - I accidentally startled a cashier at WaWa by forgetting and using my regular baritone just saying "Thank you". The expression on her face was classic though!

[franlee]

I used to be in the all or nothing and a dress or skirt, after 52 years I have learned to enjoy it "period." Nothing wrong with either way as long as you are enjoying the experience. Now I do all of the previously mentioned, just to suit the mood or occasion.

[Heather76]

I have only been out of the house fully en femme on 2 occasions. I have also been completely dressed with wig and makeup on likely 10 occasions at home. However, I am dressed in stockings, panties, bra, forms, and dress, or nightie, every day/night at home. I would "go all the way" except my wife has told me she'd rather not see me with makeup & wig. I'm planning to speak with her about that soon and will ask her to reconsider that boundary.

[docrobbysherry]

U sound more like trans a, Wendy. I'm a CD and I know quite a few others. We don't need to dress all the time.:straightface:

But, when we do? It's ALL THE WAY!:battingeyelashes:

[Taylor Dame]

I need to dress fully with wig and light makeup at the very least.

[Leslie Mary S]

I where what I feel like wearing when I feel like it. I do makeup when I feel like it or when to occasion makes me think about it, which means I don't wear much make up most of the time. i do have an Air Brush set up too (I like the thinner layers of make-up it gives you). I rarely have a five o'clock shadow.

[ColletteC]

I only dress en femme when going out in public; makeup, jewelry, painted nails, the whole nine yards. Otherwise, just dressing at home, I skip the makeup.

[Geena75]

Initially I maybe mimicked femme when I dressed, just enjoying the feeling of the clothes. Now, even if I hardly do anything beyond dressing up, I get 'femme' in my walk, posture, gestures. I just feel it.

[nancy58]

I vary my efforts depending on circumstances. During my two "home alone" weeks this year, I dressed up all the way the first day or two, and then, as the week wore on, I didn't put on makeup unless I was going out. Mentally, I compared it to what a normal woman (modeled by my wife) might do: if I'm not going to be seen by anyone, then I just want to be comfortably clothed. As for my voice, if I'm on the phone, it's with someone who only knows "Bob", but if I'm dealing with a store clerk or something, I'm going to try to sound femme. (I probably don't succeed, based on the time I was "sirred" at the Taco Bell drive-through.) :)

[Ellie52]

If Im going out it has to be perfect.
Perfect makeup and jewelry.
Clothing to match the venue - always has to be stylish no tacky stuff.

Sitting around the house or garden - Just a skirt and top and sketchers (training shoes). No wigs or forms.

Im lucky because my family and friends know about Ellie - My wife is always supportive and the neighbors are great. At the moment only one of my neighbors has seen me fully dressed but she was fantastic with it.
The other neighbors have all seen me in skirts and tops though.

My voice - is passable but I am doing voice training - I would recommend all serious outdoor CDs to try. Look for Youtube videos on Voice feminization. There are heaps of them. It makes all the difference when you understand the science behind the voice.
My only worry is if I bump into someone from work - That would be bad and hard to come to terms with.

[Rachel Anne]

In my way of thought, I absolutely could not go to the next level without getting my voice right. Everything else I think I had covered. I've always been horrible singing or doing accents, so it took me a long, long time, about 2 years, of constant practice.

Once I finally found my voice, I knew I was ready.

[wendylovescd]

Hmmm - I would not have ever thought of myself as trans. Certainly no dysphoria or thoughts to change. I feel strange that I just like to wear femme clothing some of the time, but perfectly content and happy as male self.

[Jane G]

I often feel feminine in drab. When opportunity is there I will dress to both look and feel feminine together. We are who we are. Though we are not always as we appear.

[alwayshave]

I have adult children in my home, so I don't get to dress at home. Therefore, I only dress when heading out and fully dress. I get ready at a hotel.

[GretchenM]

I rarely dress fully as I don't go out. But my normal attire and interaction behavior trends toward hints of being fairly female-like. Gentle voice, a modicum of female mannerisms and expressions, which is fairly normal for me. That said I can also be quite male-like as well. An advantage of having a very broad and adaptive identity range, but I'd rather have a narrower one on the female-like side of middle. Just not that way. So, I am mostly casual. Of course, at 77 it is very difficult to exhibit the younger woman appearance so many of you are so good at presenting, partly because you simply are younger. Don't get old!!

[Patience]

I practice with makeup at home, but when I go out, I just wear a covid mask (masks and makeup don't mix).

I like to be in full femme when I go out, but am more relaxed about it at home. Sometimes I'll do a quick errand in my home fem setup.

I don't change my voice significantly or my behavior.

[Barbara Jo]

I basically live full time as a woman at home . Keep in mind that I have no family in the area and I am now 76 years old.
I also ware panties and a bra basically 24/7, even in male mode.
So i dress more or less full time as any woman would do when just at home which includes sleeping a night gown etc.
That is my own long grey hair which I tie back in male mode.

However, the only time I do my makeup is when I go out in public as Barbara, shopping, etc.

[Stephanie47]

A long time ago I ditched the makeup when I am dressing at home. It's too much of a bother to apply and remove. If I am going out for an evening drive and stroll I will wear light makeup. As a sufferer of male pattern baldness I do wear a wig all the time. I do not use hip or butt padding. Female mannerisms come naturally now.

[Maggie3210]

Wendy, dress however your want. If it brings you joy and happiness that is all that matters. I enjoy wearing skirts, dresses, leggings, heels and flats, but not makeup and wigs. I almost exclusively wear panties, and often a bra under my drab clothes. At home i generally am in legging and flats. I enjoy the clothes, but don't really have much of a girly side. Make-up and wigs are not for me, too much work for too little reward. I do not go out in public dressed. If I did, I think i would still skip the makeup and wigs, and not try to present female, just go out being my male self in cute feminine clothing.

[Leslie Mary S]

Gretchen I am a lot like you. The voice doesn't like the change but my actions a totally neutral. It is the feel of the clothes that I like. I do go out about once a month over in Duluth, GA (Atlanta GA area).
Also I am now officially 79. That makes me 21. (100 - 79 = 21 years young)

[jessica33]

It's all or nothing for me either in or out of the house . For whatever the reason I just love to dressed to the 9th all the time .

[wendylovescd]

Wendy, dress however your want. If it brings you joy and happiness that is all that matters. I enjoy wearing skirts, dresses, leggings, heels and flats, but not makeup and wigs. I almost exclusively wear panties, and often a bra under my drab clothes. At home i generally am in legging and flats. I enjoy the clothes, but don't really have much of a girly side. Make-up and wigs are not for me, too much work for too little reward. I do not go out in public dressed. If I did, I think i would still skip the makeup and wigs, and not try to present female, just go out being my male self in cute feminine clothing.

Sounds like we have a similar mindset! My main reason in asking this question was probably, like many things here, is to feel like one is not alone in something :-).
I have a lot of time at home due to working from home and family going to school and working so I can mostly dress in what and how I like - unless I have to be on camera then the top is my normal male self.

[Tamroi]

"I enjoy the clothes, but don't really have much of a girly side."
Me too. I wear skirts and dresses all the time. Anywhere.
A hobby for me is my huge collection from thrift stores.

[SavannahVee]

All or nothing for me. My adult son still lives at home. He knows and is accepting, and usually sees me as I come and go. But I can't bring my self to dress around the house when he's around.

[DianeT]

I dress twice a year, at home, and I want it an experience to remember. Only full nines will cut it.

[_jenni_]

If I?m dressed it?s to be en femme?

[Jenniferr]

I was in the all or nothing group but I had the time and opportunity to do makeup and fully dress in order to go out. Then my kids have one by one moved back home after college, curtailing my dressing. Then Covid hit and my wife was working from home and we are in DADT so to avoid WW III breaking out Jennifer is back in the closet. Due to a company reorganization my wife was offered a great early retirement package so now she is here 24/7 to watch over me. My forays out of the closet now involve underdressing in bras and panties when I go out and dressing in bra, panties, and a dress with no makeup or wig after everyone has gone to bed. Not my ideal choice but just 10 minutes wearing a pair of panties will be enough to calm me, soothe me, take the edge off, calm the anxiety. It?s not as dangerous as self medicating with alcohol, other substances, gambling, etc.

[abby054]

There is a book entitled The Lazy Crossdresser. Some of its tips make it worth reading.

[April Rose]

Abby, I have that book and highly recommend it. It's good advice and just a fun read.

[Raychel]

Never dress to be en femme.
Not trying to pass for anyone, just dressing for my own comfort.
Just a guy in a pretty dress,

[OrdinaryAverageGuy]

100% MIAD, unless I'm in a skirt, then I'm MIAS, or Daisy Dukes, then I'm MIDD. I do shave first, nothing quite as non-sexy as a man with stubble in a sundress, but Stevie Wonder could see from across the street that I'm a guy.

[wendylovescd]

Nice to hear others with a similar approach. I will have to check out the book "The Lazy Crossdresser".

[Krisi]

For me, it's "Krisi" or "Homer". There is no "Kromer". I am either dressed or not. Dressed means wig, boobs, and hip padding, plus clothing, of course. I may not be wearing makeup or jewelry if I'm just at home and I don't consider heels to be a necessary part of dressing (I wear flats).

[jacques]

hello Wendy,
I love cross-dressing too! I am not trying to be female.
Lazy or not - as long as we enjoy it then it is fine.
luv J

[Bridget Ann Gilbert]

I can?t really feel fully feminine unless I have makeup and a wig, but that doesn?t mean I don?t experience a femme state of mind regardless of my state of dress. All part of being NB/gender fluid.