I'm mulling it over

[Heather76]

Now that the cat is out of the bag and there is no turning back, I'll be looking for opportunities to go out dressed. I take a controlled med for ADD. Because it is an amphetamine and could be addictive, I have to meet with a mental health professional at the VA on a somewhat regular basis. Basically, I see her every 4 - 5 months. She is a psychiatrist and knows I CD. The first time we met, I was underdressed with panties and a lace bralette with A/B cup inserts. She asked if I had a preferred name other than my male name. I told her I really didn't. Here's what I'm thinking about doing. My next appointment is on January 11th. I'm considering sending her a message and asking if she would have an issue with me arriving for the appointment en femme. Of course, I expect she will reply that would be fine. Since her appointment book will show my male name, I'll ask her to make a notation to call me by "Heather" when she comes to the lobby to get me. I'm afraid if Heather responds to my male name, some of the older vets in the waiting room might have strokes, or worse. lol. Anyway, I figure by January I will have had several more outings and won't be quite so timid about showing my feminine side.

[Valerie Louise]

So you?ll use the opportunity to talk about your cross dressing? I mean, if you are dressed, and clearly male, that has to come up. It has to become the main topic, right?

[Heather76]

Valerie, not at all. She already knows I crossdress. The purpose of the visit is for her to assess 2 things. First, however she makes judgements thru the "interview" process, she needs to be relatively certain I'm not addicted. The VA hates to prescribe meds to someone who is dependent upon them. The other thing she needs to feel comfortable with is that I'm not selling this drug on the streets. When it comes to drugs, I'm so straight I'd have no idea where, or how, to do that. I'm also so straight that, including 18 months in Vietnam and aboard ship, I've never ever even been offered drugs of any kind - including weed. Yep, smoked for 36 years and gave all my smoking money to Winston and Marlboro - never for any wacky weed. Un til I started to CD, I must have really been boring. Now, at each of my previous visits she has asked how everything is going for me. I'm fairly certain she really asking about my wife's acceptance of my crossdressing. So far my answer has always been "fine" and we move on. If I show up en femme, she may ask how things are with my wife in a more pointed manner; but, the answer will be the same. Anyway, my CDing will likely not be the main topic. I would trust my physical health will be.

[Crissy 107]

Heather, Interesting, it sounds like everything should be fine. Please do not cause some in the waiting room to stroke out. :)

[NancyJ]

Heather, Having worked in healthcare, I would say: Do not do it. On that day, for that appointment, tone down your femme appearance. Your psychiatrist’s job is to evaluate your ADHD meds, not discuss your crossdressing (which although she is a psychiatrist, she may know very little about and has nothing to do with the purpose of your visit). Keep her out of it, and for your own privacy, unless you plan to transition, keep your crossdressing out of your medical records. Once something is in your medical record, it travels with you everywhere and can be read by a wide variety of medical personnel. What would be gained by this MD seeing you en femme? I suggest that you keep her out of it. Her role in your life has nothing to do with crossdressing. Would showing her simply be catering to an exhibitionistic part of yourself? Just my opinion, Nancy

[kimdl93]

I am under the impression that you are seeking to expand the amount of you life spend presenting as a woman. If that is correct, I do not think there is any problem with appearing for the appointment in casual womens attire. A call ahead of time would help the clinic prepare, but I would guess that your VA psychiatrist has already made a note in your file pertaining to your preferred name. Did you plan to identify yourself as transgender? That will be put in the medical record.

I decided to present as female for my first and subsequent in person VA appointments. It was really a straightforward and respectful experience.

[Heather76]

Nancy, thanks for your perspective. I'm going to think long and hard about what you wrote. I have to agree that even though she's well aware I CD, and it is a part of my medical records, that is not the purpose of my visits. I probably do not need to distract from why I visit her.