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Maria 60
04-29-2023, 09:46 AM
It really blows me away how the mind works. Im watching TV dressed in a nighty and I'm going to shower and then bring my mother to a appointment. I have no plans of dressing this afternoon but my friend called and told me he's coming to drop something off that he borrowed later in the day. My mind automatically went to asking him what time more less is he coming and this feeling of disappointment that I can't dress until he comes. But the part that really has me stumped is, I wasn't planning on dressing anyway. I'm going to take a guess and believe the mind always wants the opportunity door always open.
Anyone else have any input on this.

Stephanie47
04-29-2023, 09:54 AM
With me it has always been the reverse. My wife is not accepting of my desire to wear women's clothing. When her social events out of the home are on the calendar and things are canceled at the last minute it is a blow. Mentally, I would have been preparing; which dress to wear, etc. Then, "poof" it's gone.

docrobbysherry
04-29-2023, 10:36 AM
Yes. Dressing as mostly mind over matter. If u don't mind? It doesn't matter, Maria!:heehee:

OrdinaryAverageGuy
04-29-2023, 12:14 PM
LOL to Doc! To Maria, Yes I'll do the same thing, what time do you think you'll be over? Or better yet Call me when you're on you way so I can make sure I'm home (to some better friends I'll say so I can put some pants on, let them assume I might be naked when I'm really in a skirt and cami)

As to having no plans to dress, I never have plans, I have opportunities. :)

Karren H
04-29-2023, 03:41 PM
With me it has always been the reverse. My wife is not accepting of my desire to wear women's clothing. When her social events out of the home are on the calendar and things are canceled at the last minute it is a blow. Mentally, I would have been preparing; which dress to wear, etc. Then, "poof" it's gone.

I used to be like you, Stephanie. Now days I just assume that I can not dress and if something comes up that changes that, big time bonus. If that goes away, then Oh Well, not big deal.

BLUE ORCHID
04-29-2023, 07:41 PM
Hi Maria:hugs:, Some times Life just Gets in the Way,

nancy58
04-29-2023, 11:08 PM
It was like that for me, too. I've found that making time for Nancy helps a lot. Also, after i managed a couple of multi-day periods when I spent every waking and sleeping hour as Nancy altered my perspective. It usually isn't worth dressing up unless I'm going to be able to go all the way.

bridget thronton
04-30-2023, 01:04 AM
No input other than it sounds like you are hoping for more dressing time each week. I suspect my planning behavior is similar.

alwayshave
04-30-2023, 05:31 AM
Maria, I have rescheduled appointments to make sure I have time to dress. I'm not surprised you think the way you do.

GretchenM
04-30-2023, 06:45 AM
Maria, in a sense you are correct about the brain. But it is open to whatever you experience and how it reacts depends on how it's operation has been defined by previous experiences, memory and learning. Thus it is always changing and adapting to whatever comes your way. The brain loves to solve problems but it does not like high degrees of conflict even though it is fully capable of dealing with that as well. Changes in expectations take a little while to work out and readjust. It is always looking for the method and approach that produces the smoothest operation. However, the brain can get messed up in a vast number of ways and when it does it can come up with solutions that do create feelings of stress, disappointment, and depression. All of this is what is called brain plasticity which is an adaptation to allow us to deal with all the tremendous variety we have in our lives. Brain plasticity is perhaps the most marvelous characteristic of this incredible organ.

The main point is it does not know what is the perfectly correct way to do anything. It essentially determines those things that produce the smoothest and what, in the context of what it has learned, is the operation that kind of tries to find the way to let all possibilities be available but only some that are implemented. All decisions and choices are made in those parts of the brain you are not aware of through your consciousness. What appears to be conscious choices is not; it is just that your brain makes it look like that has happened. Your consciousness is only made aware of the decisions that were made elsewhere, but the rest of your brain makes it look and feel like it was a conscious decision.

The bottom line is that our consciousness is a tiny part of the entire brain even though it seems to be the heart and soul of everything. Sadly it is not.

CDMargret
04-30-2023, 07:38 AM
I feel exactly the same way. In case of unannounced visitors I installed a driveway alarm. Has had me jump a few times giving me the time to change. Mostly the squirrels set it off.

Jane G
05-08-2023, 01:06 PM
Maria, though I usually wake dressed. I seldom have a plan to dress further that day. Often I'm off doing doing something external and I stopped dressing out doors years ago. But not surprisingly, as I'm retired, I sometimes find myself home and simply decide, in the moment, to dress for the day. I love the normality of that. It's just no big deal any more.

JennCurious
05-08-2023, 01:50 PM
Maria, that has happened to me a bunch of times. Or being at home relaxing and dressed up only then to be called about future plans that have changed so you have to go now. It's a mindset for sure.