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StephanieCD
05-25-2023, 04:23 PM
Recently a lovely dear friend of my wife's has had some heart to heart conversations with my wife especially, and occasionally myself. It seemed to her that my wife and I had the perfect relationship. We do have an amazing wonderful relationship but as our friend knew nothing of my crossdressing it was a false impression she had. My wife is so understanding of my dressing and supportive. But as we all know 100% acceptance of crossdressing in a marriage is quite rare, the subject often causing problems. It did not sit well with me that our friend pictured our relationship as she did. I started to feel a fraud, like I was living a lie. The subject came up between my wife and I. Should I tell her who I really am. What if it spoilt the lovely friendship the girls had, I would be devastated. Should I ? Shouldn't I ? I had been torn for weeks.
The three of us were sat down last week talking. I made the decision to bring up the subject of complicated relationships stating that was the case in our marriage. Our friend replied we had a happy marriage. Yes we do, but not as normal as you think. This brought some strange and puzzled looks to her face. I looked at my wife who held my hand. I said I'm going to tell her and the wife said ok. I told our friend I was going to tell her something that I hope would not spoil things. I was so nervous.....but said I am a crossdresser. It took a few seconds for her to process what I said then she said. WOW......of course it changes nothing. Thank you for trusting me enough to tell me it makes me feel proud and honoured. It felt like a great weight had been lifted of my shoulders. Once again my dear wife had supported me. Lots of hugs for the three of us. Very emotional. Our friend asked if she could ask questions which were answer both by my wife and I. It became lighthearted after a few minutes. What a huge relief it was out. She wants to meet Stephanie, look at my wardrobe to see my style and what I like lol. Wants to go girly shopping with us. What a blessing to have friends like this, and it has brought us closer. There are still some lovely people out there.
I had admired her toenail polish a few days earlier, bless her the following day she gave me a new one she had. I remembered you liked mine. She has since told me the conversation that day has actually helped her to accept some things in her life getting them into perspective.
This was a huge step for me to take, Stephanie now has the support of three amazing people. My wife, my stepdaughter ( who is more like my daughter) and now this friend. I know how lucky I am. My heart goes out to the girls who are not so lucky. But we do stick together and support eachother here.
Finally I hope I have not rattled on too long or been boring. But it was a milestone on my journey.
Thanks for taking the time to read this.

Di
05-25-2023, 05:13 PM
Happy it went well and your wife was included.
Great thread a happy post.

ShawnaL
05-25-2023, 05:22 PM
Wonderful events like this are never boring, and you certainly weren't "rattling on" in my opinion. Thank you for sharing this with us!

Natalie5004
05-25-2023, 06:20 PM
I too get almost to the point of sharing my hobby with a female friend of ours. Time will tell.

Thank you for a great post.

Diane P
05-25-2023, 07:27 PM
Stephanie I'm glad to hear things went so well with revealing yourself to your wife's friend. Yuor wife and her friend are two very specail people to accept you as Stephanie.

Maria 60
05-25-2023, 08:00 PM
This isn't boring and it sounds very exciting and I'm more then sure you trust her with this. A few years back I was in the same situation. My wife's friend got divorced and my wife would invite her everywhere with us because the kids were the same age. We were always together the weekends and during the week and after hours and hours of relentless talking like 3 women. She also would tell us what an amazing relationship we have and just like yourself I suggested to my wife that we could trust her and maybe it will add to our relationship. My wife didn't want to share this and wanted to be selfish and keep it as our secret. Thank goddess I listened to her because a few months later we found out her friend was talking trash about us. What a kick in the rear, we did so much for her.
Don't take it like I'm scarying you because I'm sure and it sounds like already you have an amazing bond with your friend. Keep us in the loop and let us know how everything is going and it sounds exciting.

docrobbysherry
05-25-2023, 08:05 PM
I'm sorry, Steph, but unless you're plannng on coming out? Telling folks puts a burden of secrecy on them to keep your secret!:doh:

My ex went thru this with me just this week. A number of times she wanted to tell folks about Sherry. And, I told ner NO!:thumbsdn:

Because I'm a closet dresser and she would simply be passing her burden to them! And, something happened recently with one of her friends that made her understand I was rite not to let her tell others!:thumbsup:

Crissy 107
05-25-2023, 08:49 PM
Stephanie, What a great post. You and your wife trusted your instincts and now a good friend is in the loop. You are a very lucky girl.

Veronica Lacey
05-25-2023, 08:56 PM
That's a great story, Stephanie.
Your bold disclosure in stepping out of your comfort zone unexpectedly enriched that woman's life, relieved some personal tension and deepened the relationship amongst the three of you.
Thanks for sharing.

bridget thronton
05-26-2023, 02:58 AM
Glad things went so well for the three of who and thanks for sharing you story

Emily in the south
05-26-2023, 04:57 AM
Thanks for sharing your great and happy experience Stephanie.
You have a terrific wife and now, an even more treasured friend. You are indeed a lucky girl.

Emily

kimdl93
05-26-2023, 05:49 AM
I tried to imagine myself as part of similar conversation. It too a lot of courage and trust to make in happen and speaks well of your friend, your wife and you.

Sandi Beech
05-26-2023, 06:00 AM
It is really cool that it turned out the way it did. It definitely has its risks coming out like that so it definitely takes courage to do so. I am happy for you.

Sandi

alwayshave
05-26-2023, 06:40 AM
Stephanie, I love stories of acceptance. Thank you for sharing.

GretchenM
05-26-2023, 06:52 AM
So excellent a post. Telling your friend the truth is like opening a door to a new world that is a bit more glorious than the world where secrecy ruled the roost. Opening that door and thus wiping out the secrecy by sharing the real substance of who you are liberates all who are affected. Perhaps you should allow your friend to get acquainted with Stephanie and see the total picture of who you are.

Sherry does have a point about potentially placing a secrecy pact on your friend, but perhaps the real problem was the secrecy in the first place. The world has matured some about the subject of gender, in spite of those who think very differently and wish to maintain a false narrative about the traditional and stereotypical world we have lived in for hundreds and hundreds of years. Time for a change? That seems to be happening and opening minds to see a hidden reality about each of us that is far more complex and also far more beautiful. Let your friend do with this knowledge what she wishes as that also frees you from the secrecy burden.

StephanieCD
05-27-2023, 03:48 AM
Thank you for all the nice comments to my post. I do trust this friend 100% we have know her for many years, and she has worked though some major issues. We do really have a close bond above a normal friendship. That said, I have recently started to really accept who I am. I am a really nice person that likes to wear dresses. It may be weird to some, but it really is not a crime. I am who I am, I am what I am. Should I ever be outted, well how many people would care. I'd be embarrassed but live through it lol.
It was scary and wonderful coming out to this friend. I will not regret it, what ever happens.

Connie D50
05-31-2023, 05:59 AM
What a great post thank you for sharing. I know how lucky is a understatement. So happy for you.

Heather76
05-31-2023, 07:47 PM
Your story is so wonderful and inspiring. It demonstrates that there is always hope for each step of this journey.

CDMargret
06-02-2023, 08:10 AM
Wonderful story. Thank you for sharing. My wife is very accepting of my dressing. Our last outing she was showing me purses because I mentioned I would like a bigger one. It's truly amazing to be accepted and supported.

Tabitha Storm
06-02-2023, 09:41 AM
It feels so much like a ton of bricks off your shoulders. Great story. My wife is accepting and I am so glad you are having the same support

Fiona_44
06-02-2023, 04:01 PM
Stephanie,

Thank you for posting this heart warming story. You are indeed blessed to have such women in your life. I can relate to how you felt afterwards because I have told a number of friends about Fiona and their reactions have all been very positive and accepting. In fact when I told one lady who I have known for for 25+ years, her reaction was so positive, heartfelt, sincere and supportive that my eyes welled up with tears of joy as I listened to her. I was on cloud 9 for days afterwards.

Hugs,
Fiona

Simple pleasures
06-03-2023, 03:59 PM
This is a great outcome for you all and opens the door for fun and good times ahead for you all.

Paige