Still a Little Awkward or Embarrassing

[Katherine L.]

If you have an accepting spouse or significant other, do you still sometimes find it a little awkward or embarrassing to dress in front of her?

[NancySue]

As one of the fortunate ones with a helpful, supportive wife, I do not get dressed or undressed in front of her, but I do dress every day?definitely underneath and I?m free to spend the day in an outfit of my choice. No, I?m never embarrassed or feel awkward. Occasionally, she will comment on my attire, which I appreciate. Even though she?s offered, I enjoy doing my own laundry.

[joanstickley1956]

Funny timing. I'm sitting here in my office wearing nothing but bra, panties, and forms, with my wife walking by from time to time. I am very comfortable dressing in front of her, to the point where today I was starting to annoy her, but only because I was interrupting her TV watching by asking her opinion of a bunch of new (to me) clothes that my friend gave me. She gives me honest advice on outfits. I have put on underwear and tights, changed into and out of multiple outfits, and anything else you can imagine. She just sees it as my clothes. As I've said on this forum before, I'm extremely lucky in the wife department.

[chrissy111]

Not since the first time I ever dressed in front of her. We were young when we met and she has always made me feel comfortable.

[VS Fan]

definitely do... particularly since I don't bother with a wig or makeup at home... and frankly I probably look ridiculous.

[Jillcder]

I hope to someday find out the thought of being dolled up in front of my wife would cause both embarrassment and excitement.

[Kris Burton]

I often do, but it is diminishing with time. I do not dress 24/7 nor desire to, but she has helped me taking pictures, always wants to see my new outfits, helped me and tutored me in the dark art of makeup, and has seen me on a number of occasions if I am going out and about. Sounds good, but I do seek her approval on my presentation. So far, so good.

[Krea]

Just on rare occasions.
I guess, despite my increased confidence and her loving acceptance, there is still a little shame/insecurity buried deep down inside me.

[JocelynJames]

I find it awkward only when I get obsessed with a particular thing ( silhouette or makeup , for example).

[Maria 60]

For myself it's been years dressing in front of her and some times I do feel a little embarrassed that she's looking at her husband dressed as a woman. I wrote a while ago that my wife gave me the lingerie set she wore on our wedding night. It didn't fit her anymore and she gave it to me. It was a long white gown with a sheer white cover and when I put it on i couldn't show her, it was just to feminine and I was embarrassed. I ended up wearing it to bed one night without the sheer cover, it felt amazing but don't know why just don't like her seeing me wearing that.

[EmilyShy]

Yes 🫣

My SO is accepting but only tolerates it, she hates it and rather i didn't. I do underdress occasionally in front of her and very occasionally fully dress. She never says a word about it and jusr ignores me. Other than that my dressing is behind closed doors.

But I do get very embarrassed when dressing.

Emily xx

[Jessica G.]

I like a few others come from a similar situation where I have an extremely accepting wife. She does not mind what I do and how often I do it. But there are times where I want to just wear clothing and forms and not have to do my makeup or hair and while she says she is okay with the way I look I sometimes question it. Its something that I need to stop and just accept that she does not care what I look like. I feel it's more of accepting it myself which is something I would like to do going into 2024. Otherwise I change in front of her, do makeup together, pretty much everything and there's never an issue with awkwardness.

[MeshelleCD]

Not sure that it I get embarrassed, but sometimes I do prefer to get dressed without her in the room. I do underdress every day, so it is not an infrequent thing for her to see me getting dressed.

[JulieC]

It's weird, but I don't feel awkward or embarrassed being dressed in front of my wife (who is completely accepting). I just spent a few minutes chatting with her about the upcoming week, and I'm dressed in a grey skirt, pink sweater, low pumps, pantyhose, bra, and forms. I felt fine. I don't feel awkward getting undressed in front of her. I do feel a bit awkward getting dressed in front of her.

And yeah VS Fan, I too feel ridiculous when I see myself in a mirror. :/

[alwayshave]

Katherine, My wife is accepting, even encouraging. But I often feel like I let her down when I dress. She tells me I don't, but I still worry.

[Bianca Fay]

My GF encourages me to wear pantyhose. She likes how excited I get so she enjoys those moments as well. However, I realize that it's my turn-on not hers.
Because of that fact I have no problems wearing them (or taking them off) in front of her, but I get extremely self-conscious and embarrassed putting pantyhose ON in her presence.

[Bea_]

In my case, it's not so much awkward or embarrassing as it is limited by her unspoken boundaries. She rarely comments on my dressing but has made it clear over the years that certain things are turnoffs for her. Bras and makeup are the primary gag points for her. I still indulge and she is aware, but I stay mostly discrete in those areas.

[Davinnia]

This is day 11 of my dressing fully from mid afternoon until bed time, nearly all day on Christmas Day in my best dressy outfit.My wife totally accepting which is wonderful. Nails painted & wearing a bra 24/7 even while in male mode. Luckily it's unlikely friends or neighbours would call during the festive break which makes for a more relaxing time & no worry of a quick change.

[Karren H]

Well, lucky for me my wife is not accepting so I will never have to experience that! But, I know I would feel very awkward and slightly embarrassed if I did have to dress in front of her.

[JesseVF]

Yes - embarrassing to the point it limits me regarding dressing, despite wife?s proclamations ?it?s your house too - dress how you want?, ?live your life? etc? she never comments when I do, and subtly reinforces male drab when I don?t. Leaves me kind of in a no win situation. Still better than others I know so shouldn?t complain.

[Debs]

My wife always has to inspect me before I go out shopping or going away for a few days, because I always leave the house dressed. Sometimes my skirt or dress is a little short for afternoon shopping and she requests that I get changed into something a little more appropiate for the afternoon and save the short stuff for the night out.

[Monique65]

Now that I’m assured of my wife’s acceptance, I feel quite comfortable dressing in her presence. My favorite moment is when she helps me adjust my bra straps and band, and I do the same for her.

[FeliCD]

I have slowly ?conditioned? my wife over the years to seeing me dressed. So she has seen it all. I usually let her know in advance that it?s going to be a FeliCD day (she thought up my username) . She has caught me mid-dressed between male and female mode at times (I?m an all or nothing dresser so it?s a process) and given me a wtf look . But she loves coming in the room and seeing the final presentation because it?s Soo dramatic compared to my male presentation that it catches her off guard. She will give me feedback on presentation later on (good and bad) and we both laugh about it.

[Maid_Marion]

One issue to keep in mind is that spouses often have body image issues of their own.
Be careful that you aren't triggering their personal issues.
Places like Victoria's Secret can be very upsetting if they can't wear anything VS sells!

[Cheryl T]

The very first time I dressed fully for her that was the case.
I was embarrassed and felt very nervous, mostly because I was expecting disapproval. Once we got passed that and she became accepting it was still awkward. Not dressing in front of her but being partially dressed. For the longest time I only wanted her to see me fully dressed or not at all. I didn't want her to witness the process. It took time to realize she wasn't going to "drop the hammer" and now it's just two gals getting ready.
She sees me in all states of undress, doing my makeup, standing in the closet in my lingerie deciding what to wear and it all feels natural now. The awkwardness is gone for good. It just takes time.

[Robbiegirl]

Oh Yes ! LOL She is accepting but doesn't really want to see it

I am always blushing the few times she sees me, also because she usually just teases me and laughs and walks away

Last month she caught me in a vintage babydoll nightie and just couldn't stop giggling about how much fun the lesbian girls on her softball team would have if they knew I was wearing such girly attire

The worst was about 7 years ago when she caught me standing in front of the mirror wearing a really cute bra and panty set she had thrown out ! Her respons was " Well don't you look just adorable ! Maybe you can try and get a job as a lingerie model, do you want me to take pictures ! oh lets go outside as she started pulling me toward the front door ! Ugh ! I try to be careful !

She is wonderful but I don't want to push my luck !

[kimdl93]

Kinda wish my former wife had been more accepting. I mistook tolerance for acceptance. Not long before we parted company, she acknowledged that the image of me fully dressed was burned into her memory. Even now, many years later, I feel the guilt and regret for causing her such discomfort. At the same time, I also understand that her reaction may have in part a been a reflection of her own self-image and rooted in life experiences and attitudes that predated our relationship.

[AndreaOTK]

My wife accepts it but i feel so embarrased i have never dressed in front of her.

[Davina4587]

Hi
My wife has been supportive and has known for about the last 5 years. The trouble is we have been married for 20 years and i still feel guilty for that period she didn't know. I think the fact my dressing was a secret for so long makes it both embarrassing and awkward, even though she helps me to shop and gives advice

[Aaron Zwidling]

Absolutely, but it's my issue, not my wife's. I'm older than most here and grew up in a more repressive time. Growing up dressing was either done for comedy or it was shameful and not something males should do, and even though I have become more comfortable with dressing over the years those attitudes from my childhood continue to stick with me to this day even though much diminished versus what they used to be.

[Davina4587]

Hi Aaron, judging by your response we are of similar age and I totally get where you are coming from. I have spent many hours with a counsellor discussing my own prejudices against myself caused by the type of comedy and television shows that were around in my formative years. Still have Good days and bad days with who I am but getting there to

[Jessica Secret]

Not at all for me - I have a boyfriend and I wear romantic lingerie to bed which is an incredible adrenaline rush every time. Zero awkwardness, just pure excitement especially if we're about to make love.

[Elizabeth Marie]

When I was married, my ex-wife was supportive, but she never wanted to see me as a woman. She moved back to the Twin Cities this fall, and stayed with me for 6 weeks while waiting for her new apartment to be ready. She did see me dressed as a woman multiple times, voluntarily. The first time was quite awkward for both of us, but after the first time, it was just my normal way of dressing. I could never get he to call me Beth, though. She said she was afraid she would get too used to it, and call me Beth in front of the grandkids even if I dressed as a man.

[Dannigirl]

I don't feel awkward with just wearing clothes but when it comes to full makeup and such I do feel awkward. She couldn't care one way or another but I still feel strange. My issue, not hers.

[Bluesman]

Most definitely! Even though my wife, after a long process, accepts my dressing and I freely dress around her when I have the desire, I still know that she's not totally comfortable with it, so that makes me a little uncomfortable and embarrassed when I'm dressed around her. I'm trying to get past that by dressing for longer periods of time when we're at home together, even staying dressed past the point where I'm ready to change back to 'boy mode.' Right now, at 6 pm, I've been fully dressed (dress, panties, bra with forms, light makeup, jewelry, wedge sandals) since I got up this morning at 9:00. I'm debating with myself whether to change before we begin our evening routine of cocktails and dinner, which I almost always do. I'll probably wait til the last minute, then go upstairs to change and hoping that she will stop me and say, "You don't have to change." And even though I'm actually ready to change, I'll stay dressed because "she told me to." Curious, no?