Let's Go Ouuuuuuut Tonight! (An outing story)

[miss_sarah]

Today For You - Tomorrow For Me!

So Wednesday my wife, a GG friend and I (as Sarah) daytripped to the windy city to see RENT! This marks the first major day out for me, and wow! What a liberating experience. I know I would never have had the self esteem/confidence to go through with it without the support of my wife and girlfriend.

The night before was a high-stress night. I honestly don't have anything male that I feel comfortable wearing and think I look nice. So I was raving about that all day. Finally I just decided if I couldn't find something suitable to wear, I was going in drag. There's more to that story, but I put in on my blog if you really want to read all that :) www.sarahcd.com

First thing, at like 4am, my wife and I make a mad dash to WalMart for shoes and a black bra, because all my shoes are very dressy and not at all comfortable for walking around downtown Chi all day. YAY! Shoe shopping!!!

We got together and had breakfast at the same local restaurant where we have breakfast just about once a week -- so I was most surely "made" there (although oddly enough, I'm finally learning to love myself to the point of not caring about being picked out of the crowd) but the girls were polite as always. Back on the road to Chicago, we make a quick drink stop at a gas station in one of our local hilljack towns before getting on the interstate. The girls decide they're going to make a bathroom stop... without telling me :straightface: leaving me stranded alone in the hicksville convenience store... After the third burly hard-labor-worker looking guy came in and stared me down, I'd had enough and scurried back to the car for safety.

Onto the interstate, 100-some miles later we had to make a stop in Woodridge to drop off some sound equipment to get repaired. I had spoken to the lady there on the phone the day prior, so she was likely expecting a man, but didn't bat an eye when I pranced through the door. From there it was on into the city - and lemme tell ya, we're small town people! The GG friend and I grew up together in a town of like 1400. Suffice it to say I'm not a fan of big metro "let's cram as many people as we can fit in" environments, nor can I understand why on earth anyone would LIKE that lifestyle! LOL Not that I haven't been in downtown Chicago before, but this was my first visit where I had the misfortune of driving. You couldn't pay me enough to live in a big city. There's NO JOB worth that mess! haha

Well, we got settled on the 40000th floor of the parking garage (ok, I'm exaggerating a bit...) and the theatre was only a block walk away, which was nice as the wife and I were both breaking in new shoes in the process. We had a little time to kill, so we cruised through a dress shop, and another shopping center before making our way to the theatre. OMG What a gorgeous place that was! Again, if you're interested in my take on the show (it was great, in a nutshell), see the blog, link above. We were 4th row center stage in the Orchestra seating - excellent seats!!! Anyway, intermission came and I've gotta pee really bad right. Not happenin. Way too many people there. I'm sure I would have enjoyed the 2nd act a whole lot more if they didn't have the air cranked way up, hair on my legs growing, and crossing my legs back and forth fighting the *urge*.

We decided being rush hour and all these shows getting out, it'd probably be a nightmarish wait trying to get into a restaurant (we WERE going to hike to Ed Debevic's...) so we just high-tailed it back to the car and out of the city in bumper to bumper rush hour traffic. Again, no salary is worth this!!! LOL

We ended up stopping at a Cracker Barrel for dinner, mainly because I HAD to stop SOMEWHERE to pee. No trouble using the ladies room here, no long lines, I think there was a lady in there as we were coming in, who was on her way out. Anyway, no problems :)

Halfway home, I decide my hair just isn't growing fast enough, because that bloody wig started itching like mad, and I know it doesn't look very "real" ( based on lack of hairline mainly, and the way the part looks). Gotta say overall a great experience! Not one single comment made to me, although I'm pretty sure there were some odd looks and some good conversations about it after we were out of earshot. I even conversed a bit with some elevator folks about the show, which my male persona would probably normally be too introverted and shy to do! YAY! Now I'm ready to go see it again (all the good seats are sold out by now though)!

[Joy Carter]

Totaly cool here Sarah a crowd like that can make a big differance in one's confidence when going out. So glad you took the time to share your adventer.

[Phyliss]

Miss_Sarah,

So nice to read your adventure, I so wish I had the ability to do something like that, (except for having to "P" so bad it hurt) How I envy you.

P.S. my friend M_ _ _ ife says "Hi"

[susiej]

Sarah,

What a perfect choice it was to go see "Rent" -- if anybody in the audience somehow disapproves of gender bending, they're going to get up and march out in about Act I scene 2, when the delicious Angel appears! By intermission, you were probably surrounded by several hundred people who now had empathy.

Hmm, maybe you could have used the powder room at intermission after all ;).

Hugs,
Susie

[Rachel Morley]

Awesome Sarah! Thanks for sharing. Your wife and GG friend sound cool :cool: I know how it feels to go out with one's wife en femme in public...it's a trip!

Bring on the next one! (how about a pic next time?) :)

[miss_sarah]

Thanks all!


Sarah,

What a perfect choice it was to go see "Rent" -- if anybody in the audience somehow disapproves of gender bending, they're going to get up and march out in about Act I scene 2, when the delicious Angel appears! By intermission, you were probably surrounded by several hundred people who now had empathy.

Hmm, maybe you could have used the powder room at intermission after all ;).

Hugs,
Susie


yeah, I knew this was the safest show to venture out to! Being a major RENThead myself, I picked up on a lot of the folks around us, just gauging comments, and I'd say most were also RENTheads and more specifically, huge fans of Angel. :D Oh lucky day! hehe

You're probably right ;) Although, I also realized there's a big difference between a cross-dresser CHARACTER up on stage whom everyone adored and one swishing her hips up in line behind you for the restroom! That's why my favorite song is La Vie Boheme. For the non-RENTheads, the song celebrates in list nearly every possible social abnormality, then turns around and says, "Let he among you without sin be the first to condemn!" or, if you came into this turning your nose up at any one of those things, take a hard look in the mirror because you likely fit one of the others we mentioned! :D Jonathan Larson went before his time, that's for sure. What an artistic genius! Oh well, I was likely fearful without adequate cause, and should have just gone. It only gets easier each time though, right??

Angel Darling - I know... We had the camera with us and everything, but nobody snapped any pics :brokenheart:

[miss_sarah]

So, I'd been expecting a call from that electronics repair shop letting me know an estimate of cost and when the repair work would be done, and today I got it, along with a rather long and candid conversation with the lady I dealt with there :eek:

Apparently, my visit sparked a little discussion between her and the main repair guy (the owner? Her husband I think, I'm not sure...) who was also there that day - naturally, both trying to figure out WHY I was dressed as I was (was it just because of the show we were seeing? etc). I almost expected a comment or question, but had no idea I was in for the sincere curiosity she had. She kept repeating "From talking to you on the phone the first time... you're such a nice young man, so polite and seem caring and easy-going..." (as if to say, so how could you possibly be a freak!?). She seemed to be coming from a Catholic-based stance in life, with little exposure to such things, and even less tolerance and understanding towards homosexuality (which was the only thing either of us could compare transgenderness to, really, as in, it's not a choice, if we weren't all so terrified of society's reaction to us then you'd see a whole lot more of us; conversely as we "get out" more, the more common it will become and the more accepted it will be as has been the case with homosexuality in recent years, etc).

Well, I explained my personal situation as best I could, and how it relates to the gender spectrum and levels of transness we'll say, as a whole, and I think she came away with a little bit better understanding of it all. She was at the very least compassionate and tolerant, but VERY inquisitive! We discussed the social pressures - whether truly social or based at least initially upon some religious foundation, and how they affect our little family with closeting, embarrassment, and (perhaps often times unjustified) fear, how family reaction influenced me, those pre-internet feelings of being alone in the world, being from a small podunk town... really just a whole bucket full of topics! Of course I realize a few phone conversations and a couple of quick visits in the shop won't entirely open up a new world for someone, but perhaps she'll do a little research on the subject now that she's been face to face with a real gender-bender :D She was, actually, WELL versed in a number of topics which we ended up veering off the track to discuss (like stem cell research, homosexuality, old testament in relation to today's world, etc), so she doesn't come across as one to idly make assumptions without some fact searching, which I'm assuming is why she confronted me directly about it in the first place! lol

She mentioned that if she were to introduce me to someone, she'd be most comfortable introducing me as a male - based solely on a couple of phone conversations and one in-person meeting dressed, which I can understand, and she noted that she thought it odd that I wasn't wearing makeup (which I was, but I'm subtle, not ****ty! ;) ). That, to me, was a somewhat small yet skewed indicator of passability - skewed because we had talked on the phone in which it was likely VERY OBVIOUS that I'm a guy, not to mention I had given her my real (male) name at that time as well. However, on an introspective self-discovery note, it didn't really bother me as much as I had thought it would. It seems I've grown comfortable enough with myself to take on the view of: See me as a man in a skirt, see me as a girl, whatever you want to see -- provided you're non-judgemental and at least tolerant, even if you can't approve, support, or understand on any level. WOW! It feels GREAT to realize that I've come so far!

As many of these first-timer conversations usually go, I thought up another half a million things I would have liked to have said AFTER hanging up DOH! But since I do have to make another trip up to pick up the now-fixed sound gear, perhaps giving both of us time to mill over our discussion today will lead to a deeper discussion then. One at a time ladies! I'm tryin! :D

And I'm going to send her a "THANK YOU" card expressing my gratitude at HER excellent handling of my appearing in their shop without any forewarning of representing a gender contrary to that which she had "met" on the phone prior. :rose: It's a day neither of us will likely forget, and I'll be eternally appreciative of her!

[Womanatheart1]

Dear Sarah,
Thank your for the post. Unbelievable!! The thrill of reading the events! Thanks for sending the gal and thank you card. Understanding souls are precious. :happy:
PS: You look great! Go in condifidence!
Love,
Stephanie

[uknowhoo]

Soo very cool Sarah, thanks for posting!!