The dreaded traffic stop

[Cheryl T]

Well, it happened last night.
The biggest fear for many is to be stopped by the police while out and fully dressed. It's not my fear as I've been in other similar situations before, but it is still for many.
We decided to get Chinese takeout. I had dressed in the morning and since we go out regularly it was not even a consideration that I would change. I was wearing a black and white striped blouse, grey skirt, black pantyhose and was in my short red wig (one I hadn't worn in a long time). I got my purse and coat and off we went to get our food. I always drive and she gets the food. Well, when she came out there was no traffic but 2 vehicles about 3 blocks away. So wanting to get the food home still warm (it was about 25 degrees out) I checked traffic, pulled out of the parking slot and made a quick U-turn. It's a 25 mph zone and I was doing 23 but this black SUV came up quickly and got really close.
Then it happened.

Lights, Siren, Police.

I pulled over quickly to let him by thinking he had gotten a call, but he pulled over behind me. UH-OH, what now!
Not waiting for him I got my license from my purse and the registration and insurance card from the glove box. About a minute later he got out and did the typical police thing. He looked at the license plate, touched the tail light (I think they do this to leave fingerprints to identify the car in case things go bad). He shined his flashlight in the rear seat and checked for passengers. I already had the window down waiting. He asked if I knew why he stopped me and I politely said I had no idea. I didn't even try to disguise my voice. At this point I had raised my hand with the paperwork and he just went "Oh" in surprise that he didn't have to ask. He told me I made an illegal U-turn as it was against the law in this town. He stated there were signs at each intersection (which I have never seen, but will look for) and I said I hadn't seen them.
When he finished checking my ID's he came back and said he wasn't issuing a summons this time but that I should be more careful in the future. I thanked him and we came home to have our dinner.

Later my wife asked if my heart fluttered when he pulled us over. I told her no, he wasn't my type and we laughed. I said my first thought was "$%@# how much will this be, about $100?" Then my next was How many points on my license (I haven't had any in 40 years). Then "Insurance surcharge I bet when they find out".

He was professional, courteous and never said a word about how I was dressed. Sure it's scary the first time something like this happens to you, but it's not the end of the world.

This is how I looked.
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[Stephanie47]

You're right about the potential of the "dreaded" traffic stop. It always ran through my mind that the encounter would be with a less than professional law enforcement officer. In the past I always liked taking a drive with a evening stroll. I always made sure I had enough gasoline in the tank and all the headlamps and turn signals worked correctly. Also, everyone has to check out the driving laws in any state that you are visiting. What may be a civil infraction in my state, may still be a criminal infraction in another....off to jail if driving with a suspended license. Being put in a holding tank overnight may not be a great experience.

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Cheryl :hugs:, That went rather well, , I always like a story with a Happy Ending, >Orchid**O:daydreaming:O**

[NancySue]

Cheryl, thanks for sharing your story. Incidentally, you look very nice. Oh my, an illegal u- turn? 🙄 A slow night? I hope your insurance company overlooks it. Your experience is my/our biggest fear, along with a fender bender. We, too go out often for rides, shopping, etc.It seems like drivers are getting more aggressive, speeding, tailgating, etc. We have a lot of roundabouts in our small town. I?ve had to slam my brakes on several times as they speed into them. It?s scary. I?ve been very lucky, so far, knock on wood.

[Kitty Sue]

You are not alone. I was pulled over back in the late 90s while fully dressed. He was professional. He told me I had a light out and told me to have a goodnight.

[mykell]

glad you were left with just a warning, i was pulled over by state police in neptune after my trans meetup when i held them, i changed before i left as it was easier than later in the car, asked where i was coming from, told him from my trans support group, had my hands up when he approached the car, been 40 + since ive been in this situation, he asked why....answered to help you feel comfortable.

headlamp was out and left with a warning....

[Melani65]

Yep had a few run-ins with the police myself. Always best to just be straightforward and upfront. In my situations, the officers never escalated or even ticketed me. I'm betting they have some level of training, and unless it's a bad encounter they prefer to just leave it at a warning. Glad yours worked out in your favor.

[Cheryl T]

It's not the first time I've had something happen while driving.
Once I was going up to work on our vacation home, dressed of course and alone. As I exited one interstate and got on another the engine overheated. I called for a tow and waited. As I did a State Trooper came by and stopped to ask if I was ok. I told him yes, that I had a tow truck on the way and he nodded and left. When the tow arrived it was a young man about 26. He was professional, courteous and helpful. He told me to wait in the cab as he took car of my vehicle then he drove me to my house. I thanked him and gave him a nice tip. Then I went in, changed and figured out that the thermostat was bad so I ran off to get one and solve the problem. So much for that weekend of housework.
Each time something happened I've been lucky enough to encounter nice people. There are many out there and I think we make it more difficult on ourselves with worry that is not as dire as we suspect.

Still, it's good to be prepared.

[Robyn n TN]

My experience with law enforcement, while in Robyn mode, has aways gone well. I have never had a dealing with local police but many encounters with TSA and Customs agents. Most of them have seen it all and are very professional. Glad you got off with only a warning... Great story..

[Glenda58]

I got stopped crossing the broader to Canada. Pull me over for a car inspection. Called me madam. Check the car my passport. Wanted to know where I was going. Coming back to the States had to do it again.

[GracieRose]

I was rear-ended once while dressed. We pulled over and called the police. The woman that hit me said her husband would be mad at her and asked me how my husband would react. When exchanging info, I gave her my real name and she was confused. She continued to refer to me as 'her' and 'she'. When the policeman looked at my driver's license, he wrote down the info without batting an eye or showing any surprise. They've seen it all, and this is mild in comparison to what they have to deal with on a regular basis.

[bridget thronton]

Thanks for sharing - glad the traffic stop was a non-event

[Andrea Renea]

Reading your story I remembered the Andy Griffith episode where Gomer chases Barney yelling "citizens arrest" after Barney made a illegal U turn.

Glad you only got a warning.

[kimdl93]

I guess it happens at least once. Hope your heart rate has settled down!

[Cheryl T]

Kim,
My heart rate never moved. I was more concerned with the potential expense and a bit mad at myself for getting caught...LOL.

Andrea,
I never saw that episode or at least I don't remember it. I'll have to find it and show it to my wife. She'll get a laugh out of it. Now if Barney had only been in drag.

[MsEva]

Hi Cheryl, that would be one of my most dreadful encounters. So glad you were able to have some peace about it. It is so nice that you had your loving wife along. I have travelled quite a few times from VA to PA dressed. Thankfully nothing as traumatic (to me) ever happened. It does give one pause and gives a path to an acceptable outcome.

[OrdinaryAverageGuy]

I was stopped for a U-turn in Illinois in the middle of the night recently. Wasn't really "dressed", but I was wearing a pair of rather short yoga shorts and a women's top for the comfort. He didn't care about my clothes, really just wanted to see if I was drunk so it was also a non-event.

[Connie D50]

You look so nice I'm sure he wasn't going to couse a seen. With my luck I would be handcuffed on the trunk of the car lol.

[Philipa Jane]

As yet this has not happened to me. It is always a possibility that I could get stopped for a random breath test. We have a few busses set up for that purpose and often two or three police cars will set and test everyone who passes by.
My only issue would be that I am not always dressed in a wig but just a little makeup. My details are all in my female name.

[Sallee]

been there done that and I did get a ticket and had to go to traffic school. I made a left hand turn where I wasn't suppose to. All in all it was no big deal I was in the gay neighborhood so I am sure it didn't surprise the cop. I don't think he even commented on it.

[alwayshave]

Cheryl, My heart definitely would have fluttered. I'm glad you got off with just the warning.

[Kandi Robbins]

Pulled over four times (over ten years). Never an issue regarding my attire. Ate one ticket. Talked my way out of another. Went to traffic court twice (always dressed). I am two for two as my own counsel. I am far from a lawyer. Just wanted to avoid the points and was successful both times. Ladies, if you own it, you will should never have an issue.

[Nancy44]

Could have been a lot worse. You could have been in stillettos and asked to walk a sobriety line. 😊. Glad it worked out.

[Jillcder]

Great story Cheryl, you looked lovely in your blouse and skirt I must say Im very envious of how your Crossdressing is such a normal part of your life your wife is a sweetheart for sure.

[Cheryl T]

Kandi,
I'll keep you in mind if I ever need representation in traffic court. We'd make quite the pair before the judge I'm sure.

Nancy44,
I wish! Had foot surgery a dozen years ago and can't wear my beloved stilettos any longer. But I would have given him a show walking that line for sure. Probably end up on an episode of Ru Paul's Drag Race. Ask me to walk the line will you!

Jillcder,
Thank you. I'm very lucky to have her and her wonderful acceptance. It's been such a relief from all the hiding and sneaking I did in my youth.

[JulieC]

Nancy44; WELCOME TO THE FORUM! :)

To the point of being pulled over; I get that it's really stressful. I remember seeing a COPS episode from many, many years ago and the cops were ridiculing someone who was crossdressed. Really unprofessional.

On the flip side; if the 'worst' thing a cop encounters in any given year is someone crossdressed, they've had an incredibly good/lucky year. They're probably thankful it was so easy to work with you.

There are things you can do to make a cop's life easier, and thus likely make it easier for you. I'm not an expert, but these are things I've learned to do and have done:

If you're on a busy road, and there's a very nearby not busy road to pull off onto and pull over, slow down to get there and take it. Pull over immediately after making the turn. A less busy road is less dangerous for a cop.
Turn off your car, put your hazards on. An off car isn't going to suddenly peel off.
Have your window rolled down when they approach.
Keep your hands in plain sight. Standard position on the steering wheel (10 and 2 o'clock) or on the door/out the window both work well. It's less scary for a cop if they can see your hands.
If it's nighttime, turn on your interior lights so the cop can easily see into the car. Otherwise, they can be more on edge wondering if there's a weapon.
Be polite and agreeable. You never have to admit to anything or talk with them much (more on that in a moment) but you can be very polite.

Don't make any moves, especially with your hands, without them directing you to do so (such as being asked for your license and registration).



On a more serious note; DO NOT TALK TO THE POLICE beyond what is necessary. Don't believe me? Watch (video quality is low, but it's the audio content that matters): https://youtu.be/d-7o9xYp7eE?si=N1TNtxD4_0AVqpV0

[Heather76]

Kim,
My heart rate never moved. I was more concerned with the potential expense and a bit mad at myself for getting caught...LOL.

Andrea,
I never saw that episode or at least I don't remember it. I'll have to find it and show it to my wife. She'll get a laugh out of it. Now if Barney had only been in drag.

Season 4, Episode 11. Citizen's Arrest. My wife and I watch reruns regularly. And, of course, Barney cross dresses in many episodes. I've often thought of asking my wife why most people get a kick out of characters on TV or the big screen cross dressing yet are critical of those of us who do so in real life. But, common sense takes over and I never ask the question.

[danniUK]

I think my head knows that if I had any interactions with the police while dressed then they'd behave professionally (in the UK). My heart however would definitely be pounding the first time!
Love to read stories of where everything went well!

[Fiona_44]

I have not been pulled over yet but have interacted with cops 3 or 4 times in asking for directions or about parking rules. I have never had a problem, the police here in the NY metro area have seen it all and talking to a trans woman is no big deal.

[Kitty S]

One advantage of where I live is you have to really try to get a ticket around here. We have 2 stop signs on Main Street and the nearest traffic light is a 45 minute drive. Another advantage is I can walk in the forest en femme without leaving my property!

[Desiree2bababe]

I learned my lesson that it's best just to pull over at the early age of 17 when I stupidly tried to shed the femineity I was in whilst slowly ignoring the blue lights. That did not end well at all and even further outed my transvestism at school. Since that lesson I've been pulled over three and two times I was left with a warning, the last time I was told I shouldn't be driving and if I did I would end up in jail where I knew what would happen to me dressed like I was. A very nice Vietnamese girl working at the gas station I'd been pulled over at talked her sister into following us to my home while she drove my truck home. She did this kind gesture in pouring down rain. She was very accepting of my crossdressing but said it was strictly forbidden in her home town. I regret not pursuing her as a girlfriend as she was so nice and beautiful beyond description. I went back weeks later and found out she'd been deported for not having the proper documentation. I often wonder how my life would have been had she became Mrs. Desiree.

[Ann Simpson]

We were in a town that had signs that said "NO J TURNS" I think it means what???
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[Helen_Highwater]

In my early days when my clothes were all rescued from the jumble sale bag so nt the best of fits and usually a bit out of fashion, I'd go for drives under the cover of darkness.

One such time I got pulled over and I don't mind admitting that I was scared witless. Rabbit in headlights sort of thing. However the cop was polite, just wanted to know what I was doing out that time of night, that sort of thing, all good and sent on my way.

Now years later, having gained a much better wardrobe and certainly a huge amount of confidence from my time out and about, in some ways I'd like to be stopped while enfemme to see just how I'd be dealt with all these years later. Look, I'm not going to drive like a loon or drink drive to attract attention but I know from my side, any interaction would be calmer and far less fraught.

I also suspect from the old bill's side, it'd be pretty much a routine non event. I think the only thing that would faze me is if it turned out to be one of those where the cops were being filmed for one of those chase me, catch me reality TV shows. I don't think I'm that ready for my 15 minutes of fame while enfemme just yet. Certainly face pixilated out would be the order of the day.

[Cheryl T]

Never heard the term J-turn but did find this.
I don't think I will be trying this anytime soon, especially in town.

A J-turn is a driving maneuver in which a reversing vehicle is spun 180 degrees and continues, facing forward, without changing direction of travel. The J-turn is also called a "moonshiner's turn" (from the evasive driving tactics used by bootleggers), a "reverse 180", a reverse flick, a "Rockford Turn", a "Rockford Spin",

[Maria 60]

If I was dressed like you were and looked like you do I don't think I would have had a problem, you were dressed very conservative and well put together. I only had a few experiences and they were both spot checks, the problem with the first time was I was only dressed from the waist down, I remember when it happened I had just joined this community and was starting to gain signs of confidence. When the policeman looked down and was just frozen there for a second, for the first time in my life I told him that I was a crossdresser. I was more nervous and scared only because I was dressed only from the waist down almost looking like a pervert, stockings out and trying so hard to pull down that mini skirt down. He told me there was a missing child and they were checking all the cars and told me to have a nice day. The second time was a spot check for drunk drivers, I did see a little awkward look on the officers face when he approached me, but then was very professional and just asked me if I was drinking and sent me on my way. I was much more calm then because I was fully dressed.