It never rains but it pours.

[Philipa Jane]

Now that is an old saying and in this case it is not a bad thing.
I have been trying to make a new social circle.
If you remember any old post I lost all of my so called close friends when I transitioned.
I had made some acquaintances but no going out or seeing on a regular basis.
This week I have been messaging two ladies on a social site each night to se if I can get a contact.
Some who profess to be lonely did not even reply to say no. (I reply to anyone who contacts me) Different values.

Well last night I have had two ladies agree to meet me for coffee. I am meeting one for lunch and the other at a cafe.
Now here is the kicker they are both on the same day. Tomorrow in fact.
I did not want to put either off for another time in case they thought it was too hard to meet up.
Strike while the iron is hot and all that.
So far neither of them know I am trans . I think it will come up in conversation but to date I have yet to meet any GG who has not been OK with me.
I guess my own fear is them not meeting me if I told them outright of my story.
I work on the principle. See the person not a problem.
I shall come back and update the meetings.
Wish me luck.

[SylphDevine]

Good luck. you deserve new friends.

I don't know what I'd do if I came out and all my friends left me because of it. You're one brave woman Philipa.

[Suzie Petersen]

Fingers crossed, Philippa! How it goes well and you find some new and more true friends.

I fear the same would happen to me, although I don't have very many to lose.

Hugs
Suzie

[alwayshave]

Philipa Jane, I hope both your meetings go well.

[Frannie7]

Good luck with your meetings, Phillipa Jane

[Crissy 107]

Good luck Philipa Jane! I hope everything goes really good.
Looking forward to hearing how it goes.

[kimdl93]

Good luck! Enjoy both of these encounters!

[Jolene Robertson]

Good luck today, hope both meet ups go well. I'll be checking back to see how it goes.

[Connie D50]

Good luck more important have fun :)

[bridget thronton]

Enjoy the possibility of making new friends

[Jenn A116]

Wishing you all the best in establishing your new social circles. Hope these two dates work out and that you have more along the way.

[Marketa]

Good luck, Philipa.
I'm looking forward for your update and I wish you had a great time with both of them.

[docrobbysherry]

I'm not sure I understand? R u meeting them as Phillipa? And, if so do they know you're trans?:straightface:

[Philipa Jane]

Hi everyone. Thanks for the good thoughts.
Yes Sherry I always meet people as Philippa, my other person is gone for good.

I had lunch yesterday with Helen. She is a take charge kind of woman and I know she cannot eat a great deal (stomach band) I let her choose what we shared from the menu. After lunch I did ask her if it was OK for me to pay . I am still learning here. ?h all right then".

Today I took a little more time with my makeup and did a good job. It must have been Ok as I got complimented on it.
I met Jan at a cafe in a shopping centre and as I already had a pot of tea in front of me I asked what she would like. Jan asked if I was hungry as it was lunchtime and I was able to once again suggest I pay. My reasoning was there was a queue and for each of us to go up separately would mean we did not get our lunches at the same time.
Jan was looking very much the same as her photograph (many do not).
We had an exceptionally good time exchanging a little history. I did say within a few minutes that I was trans. I had been worried how this would go over. Absolutely no issues whatso ever. With that out of the way the next 2 hours went by so quickly. If I had not got the other meeting I would have gone shopping with her.
I know we will be meeting again.

My next meeting with Moira did not feel as comfortable and I did learn something.
Her photo did not look the same as in person so I guess it was a little time ago that it was taken. In the photo she looks like Helen Mirren. Time , stress and a few years had taken it's toll.
Still see the person.
I once again took the opportunity to suggest I pay as I had invited her to the cafe.
Once we were settled with coffee and cake she proceeded to very quietly tell me a lot of her recent issues.
I found myself nodding and smiling a great deal as I could not hear her. My hearing is still very good despite my age. After about 5 minutes I got a few words in and told her I was not what I seemed and told her I was trans. She was a little shocked as she told me she just thought I was a woman with a deep voice.
This was the lesson learned. Keep quiet with my gender.

Interestingly she worked for the government in a psychology department and was dealing with a number of transgender people at work. Any how she did most of the talking. I tried to get a few words in but it was a one sided conversation.
Her somewhat deep voice was due to smoking all her life. A turn off for me.
She was Ok to chat to on messages but all in all in all I don't think we will meet again in person.
I wished her well and came home.
I am quite exhausted. Another day and one at a time for meetings.

[docrobbysherry]

I find your dating posts quite interesting, Philippa. As someone who tried online dating for a number of years after my divorce. |

U seem to obsess a bit about who pays? I must have met at least 25 women similarly but I can't recall who paid the bill with any of them!:straightface:

[Marketa]

I'm glad you had a good time, especially with Jen.

And Moira's "I thought you're a woman with deeper voice" is great. I'm happy for you.

[Philipa Jane]

Just a little footnote for Sherry.
I think that me paying on any first date is a holdover from my masculine side.
I also think it is a nice thing to do.

I am happy to go dutch after I have been out with someone a second time.
With one date I went on the woman I was meeting insisted on paying her own way and ordered for herself.
That was OK as she asserting her independence.
As a result we ended up eating at different times (you had to go to the bar to order) and because of my own values I waited for her meal to arrive before starting mine, Which by this time was cold.