Fathers Day

[Traci H]

Although we dress as women, many of us are Fathers and I suspect good ones at that. In one week Fathers Day will arrive in the US and many of us will receive gifts from our wives and children. Being a bit older now, I am very hard to shop for, I think. As sometimes happens, our spouse may ask, ?What would you like for Fathers Day?? So I wonder if this might be an opportunity for express our desire for something feminine and maybe find an open mind. I am pretty much in DADT, or worse, yet my wife is aware of my full drawer of panties and my need to dress to some degree. I am contemplating telling my wife I would like to get a pedicure with color. Seems reasonable to me. She goes often enough, why not me. Might not seem so reasonable to my wife though. Since I have less years ahead of me on this blue marble than behind, I might just push the limits a bit.

(I must advise that 30 years ago she walked into our bathroom and I was just getting into the shower. I had red toenails and she freaked. I removed the color that day.)

Do any of you have similar thoughts, or maybe you used such an opportunity in the past? I?m dreaming of sparkling purple or red toe nails that will bring joy to me each time I view them. What a gift that would be!

What would you ask for?

Traci

[Sometimes Steffi]

I figure that Father's day is as much for the family as the father. Create only positive memories for your loved ones. Don't create any negative memories. When you're in the coffin, you don't want her to think about the father's day when he asked for a pedi.

I suggest that you gift yourself. It might surprise you to find out that giving a pedi to a guy is not much more difficult than giving one to a girl, except the nail tech may need to break out the larger sized nail clippers to cut through thicker nails. And if you're open to it, you may even inform the nail tech that it's for father's day. You can be ambiguous about whether you're gifting yourself, surprising your wife or doing it at her request (or any other comforting mantra you may come up with).

I just had mine done, gifting myself. I have a regular salon, "where everyone knows my name(s)". I've often gone there in full femme.

In case you're wondering, I had mine done in sunshine yellow (think "traffic light"), and they're hidden safely under my socks.

You can do it too! If you dare!.

[kimdl93]

I may get a gift certificate from my sons, but these are usually from a big box store and get spent on various home improvement projects.

[Traci H]

Steffi, it?s not the gift of the pedi I?m looking for, it?s the gift of acceptance. Being the eternal optimist I am always hoping that my wife will become just a tad accepting someday. I have no problem walking into a shop for a pedicure. Super shiny pink, purple of red, bring it on. The only hurdle is what it would do to my wife, so getting her perhaps on board would be the greatest Fathers Day gift of all. I know, I?m a foolish girl at heart.

[Aka_Donna]

Father's day should only be traditional male gifts, unless you ask for a unisex noshow socks. There's too much negativity and unnecessary criticism in today's world. live and let others live.... Negativity can come back another day.

[docrobbysherry]

I'm with Steffi, Traci. Being a closet dresser means Father's Day is all about me and my kids!:)

Sherry has no part in my family affairs and that's just fine with me!:battingeyelashes:

They Don't Ask so I Don't Tell what she does!:devil:

[Sometimes Steffi]

I'm looking for ... the gift of acceptance. Being the eternal optimist I am always hoping that my wife will become just a tad accepting someday.

Now that's a much bigger ask.

I'm a life-long crossdresser. I didn't tell my prospective bride before we got married, because I thought marriage would cure me. Yeah, right. But based on the assumption that I was the only person in the world like this, I didn't have anyone to ask.

I'm a pessimist, and have no expectation of increased acceptance. I have what I would characterize as DADT tolerance. She knows that I crossdress, but could only speculate on the size, extent and variety of my wardrobe. She gives me permission to go "Out and About" and permission to go to the Keystone Conference.

One time I wanted to go get a makeover, with an out-of-town overnight trip. I disguised it as a business trip that was close enough to drive to.

Maybe you could consider moderating your expectations of acceptance.

[DAVIDA]

My daughter has given me gifts along the lines of dresses and shoes before, but the last few years it is mostly gift certificates for Lowe's or Bass Pro Shop.:heehee:
It really doesn't matter to me.:thumbsup:

[Michaela Jane]

Where I come from, Fathers Day was never a thing, certainly not a day on the calendar. When I married an American lady in 2002 and she moved to the UK, she brought with her these weird anniversaries, like Fathers Day. She was instrumental in us giving my Dad a Fathers Day card. By then, these things had started to appear in the shops and only advertised on banners in the shop windows. My Dad was taken aback and didn't really know how to take it. At 80yrs old, he had never, in his life been given a Fathers Day card, and I think that he was somewhat embarrassed. I certainly had never given him one, there was never any such event in our calendar requiring such a thing. Now, living in America on my own, wifey having passed 8yrs ago, the girls (my step-kids) ask me where I would like to go to eat on Fathers Day, "It's our treat", they say. I know for a fact that they will each get me a card as well, but this time, when I was asked where I would like to go and eat, I told them, "My House." This way, they are out no expense, I don't feel that I have to go for the cheapest on the menu, I get to cook for them, and we can all be ourselves. They will still give me a card, they will write something in it, it'll probably make me emotional, but at least I am at home, and can shed a tear if I need to amongst wonderful company.

[Jane G]

Any thing received for fathers day will be a bonus on life. My beautiful wife will be on holiday in the Canary islands. Our son lives 11800 miles away and I don't expect him to notice. Best chance is our daughter. I'm fairly sur I will receive a bar of chocolate and a cup of tea from her as she lives across the road from us.:)

[Sometimes Steffi]

I'd love to see what I could be made up to look like. But I'm too embarrassed to ask her.


My profile pic (not my avatar) is one of the many pics from my makeover. It was well worth everything I spent on it and the deception that was required to get it done.

There used to be a lady in Atlanta (Phoebe, maybe) who did MtF makeovers, but I think she retired.

Most of the retail cosmetic stores, e.g., MAC, Sephora and Ulta will do makeovers for those of us brave enough to ask. I've asked at MAC.

[Michaela Jane]

Jane G. my own "English" kids don't recognise Fathers Day, one lives in Canada and one in New Zealand. I fully expect not to hear from either of them. LOL

[Jane G]

Our son lives in Wellington. May I ask if where your son resides.

[Sometimes Steffi]

I'd love to see what I could be made up to look like. But I'm too embarrassed to ask her.

Just another thought. Your profiles says you're from SE United States. The Atlanta Comfort [Transgender] Conference is being held August 14-18 2024, in Atlanta, GA naturally. If the CC is anything like the Keystone Conference, the hotel will be swarming with Makeup Artists. I've gone to Keystone Conference 12 times and have gotten makeovers many times, sometimes more than once over the 4-day conference. Nothing like getting a makeover and having a chance to take it for a spin with other like-minded girls.

Just make sure any plans are approved by your SO.

[OrdinaryAverageGuy]

My daughter took me for a pedi once for fathers day. I know, this has nothing to do with the acceptance you're hoping for, but I hope you get that too. Life is too short to not be able to embrace pretty toenails.

[GracieRose]

I look at the targeted Father's Day ads, and generally don't see anything that I am interested in. (A stupid tie??? A cute blouse would be so much nicer. But, my wife doesn't want them to know that much about me.) I tell my kids not to get me anything, but they feel like that have to. I've suggested making a donation to a deserving organization in my name, but they feel like they can fulfill their obligation better by handing me a gift. I had the idea to suggest that they make a donation to the local Trans support group. However, making a suggestion like that would be like outing myself, and that would upset my wife. Perhaps steer them away from 'manly' gifts that you have no use for, but instead of the direction that you'd like them to look, suggest something that you like to eat. In my case, dark chocolates are always welcome.

[alwayshave]

Traci, Father's Day is not the best off days. It reminds me I haven't seen my children in close to fifteen years. With regards to gifts, I always tell my wife the best gift is nothing at all. That way I avoid disappointment.

[Aka_Donna]

bummer. Usually uncomfortable with father's day as the boys being typical boys don't want much to do with dad. I just wanted the day to be about celebrating a special day for handling as best as possible the topsy turvey world of current expectations of fathers and some acknowledgement of doing the best I could bouncing off the flippers of life. I didn't respond to the post about getting old and things were harder. One major item I had been putting off was cutting nails as it's more difficult to see, to flex to get in the right position and especially not to cut off too much. So feeling embarrassed, I finally did my nails. It took 2 days, but did them. But, but talk about bad timing. My wife had noticed my nails were way way way too long and she knew I dreamed of a pedicure. So she suggested I go and get a pedicure. Opps, now have to wait 4 to 6 weeks, but looking forward to it. It will make for a memorable father's day, just did not anticipate I would wreck the timing. Yep, life is interesting....

[SylphDevine]

Father's Day is a major holiday in our relationship. The kids are all grown and gone, but I get a long newsy friendly call from each of them. My wife serves me coffee and breakfast in bed, and later in the day we go out for a nice dinner somewhere.

Sylph also gets to come out to play and I am encouraged to be en femme as I like while we're in the house. I love to dress up and dance with her in the living room which always gets me terribly distracted because she likes to cuddle and slow dance when Sylph is around.

No presents, just great connection and company. The kids always like to tell me stories of all the cool things I did with them when they were growing up, and they are very friendly and loving when they call.

Considering my rather dark history of abuse from my family of origin, I have come a long way to love and acceptance from the family I created.

So, Father's Day to me is a reminder of that blessing. I delivered two of the kids at our home births, and getting married changed my life as I learned what it was like and what it took to be a Father.

[CynthiaD]

Į got some dangly earrings, a necklace, and a nail polish collection. And a steam punk walking stick.

I also had a nice visit with two of my daughters and two of my grandchildren. The visit was the best part.