The Day Ahead

[Traci H]

Finally, it looks like I might have several hours to myself today to do as I wish. My wife will be gone to gathering with friends. Of course, for the last several days my mind has contemplated this luxury as my wife is not accepting of my cding at all.

The problem is I can?t decide what to do! Of course I would like to dress, but the issue could be I don?t know how long this window will last. It?s not like she will be out of town. So the risks are higher of being caught.

I might just dress with simpler things like leggings, top and underwear garments. Things that can be removed fast or won?t provoke a really negative response. I even contemplated working on my panty drawer as it has become kind of messy. Same with my sock and bra drawer. I also thought about working on my stash places as I need to firm those up so they work better for the future. Easier to do when the wife is not here and an investment in future dressing.

Or maybe just get all dolled up sans makeup and wig, but then have to figure out when to take most of it all off and that?s a risk.

I don?t want to waste an opportunity, yet with an unaccepting wife who gets upset with my hobby, there are risks involved. We have been together a long time, but the friction of this situation has not changed much. Sometimes the potential for a fight over it takes the joy out of it. How I envy those of you with even some acceptance.

I?m curious how others have wrestled with this dressing opportunity.

[Debbie Denier]

My wife is also not accepting at all. I usually arrange to provide taxi services to and from the gathering. Then no worries of being caught, gives time to get changed and gets me into her good books.

[kimdl93]

I would be a poor role model. I wrestled with it rather unsuccessfully until I finally felt compelled to press the issue directly. That worked in the short term, but we ended up separating some 18 months later.

[Mercedes]

Hello Traci, when I have limited time, because I am not sure when my adult children, who are still at home will be heading home is, I monitor the Find my iPhone App, as we all share the location with each other. I am not sure this will work for your situation but it does give me some comfort on when I need to change. My wife knows and is ok seeing me dressed but the kids do not know so I keep an eye on their location when I know they should be on their way. So far so good.

[Taylor Dame]

Since my wife and I travel together often, we have "Find My Phone" connecting our phones. I use that to keep track of when she is returning. She knows I dress, but doesn't want to see it.

[Philippa Jane]

My wife used to call me and let me know she was on her way home.
She knew about my CD side at the time but did not want to see it.
Worked for both of us.

[_jenni_]

That phone call about heading home makes it so much easier? if you don?t have your phone on silent.

[Raychel]

when I first told my wife at the time.
She absolutely did not want to see me dressed.
Overtime she knew I would be dressing when she went out,
she would take the kids to give me some private time.
She would call when she was on the way home to give me a chance to change
and keep the secret under cover.
Later on as time went by she eventually did learn to accept my appearance when dressed
and the hiding was no longer an issue.

So even though she is not accepting. It sounds like she is aware.
Let her know you will be dressing while she is out.
And if she does not want to see it, then it would be great if she could give you a call before she came home.
Just my thoughts.

[DianeT]

You need to discuss an arrangement with your wife. Since you're not going to stop, the two of you need to come to terms with it, together, as two adults. Ignoring your needs on her end and ignoring the risk on yours can only end up in more suffering, and I don't think any of you wants the other one to be miserable.