Presenting without dressing

[Angela Marie]

I have not dressed fully in several months. Nothing major, just family issues, traveling etc. I have however been dressing more feminine. Leggings, tight top, nail polish, and this week a brow wax. I still love to dress fully, but I feel a sense of empowerment without the wigs and makeup. I feel as if isan affirmation of my female identity, which is not necessarily defined by dressing fully.

[bridget thronton]

Glad you have embraced who you are

[Rhonda Jean]

I get it. After a lengthy hiatus I'm dressing fully again, but it's not as exciting or as fulfilling as it used to be, and it's a lot of trouble. I've been having my brows waxed for decades. Mani-pedis are more sporadic than they used to be. Now I might go a few weeks or a few months between, and I wear polish until I have to go back to work (typically over a weekend or a day or so longer). Leggings and a long top are my go-to. I'll sometimes wear mascara and concealer and still feel very much in male mode, although I know my own perception of it is likely different from what others see. Several years ago I started carrying a purse when not at work. My goal was then to make that as common as picking up my keys. I've been kind of up and down on that. I sometimes still leave my purse in the car if I'm going some place where it's likely to draw unwanted attention. Still a work in progress. Kind of a barometer of mood, confidence, I don't know what. I love purses! It's a statement, I'm just not exactly sure what I'm saying (or if I'd be better off keeping it to myself!)

[Liz Jones]

Rhonda,
On this side of the pond years ago one didnt see men with handbags slung over their shoulder-- only Woman. But now its getting quite normal-- even my Son -in - law has one ! so perhaps ........

[Kris Burton]

I think that's pretty much what ciswomen do - they do not always dress to the nines either. Perhaps our biggest challenge is to appear feminine without the vast quantities of mascara, lipstick, etc.

[April Rose]

Whether or not to leave my purse in the car has been an ongoing challenge for me, too. I'm in androgynous women's clothes as my version of drab as often or more often than not. Add shoulder length hair and earrings to the mix, and Ive been addressed as she or her several times in the past year.

[docrobbysherry]

You'll fit rite in with young trans of today, AM! They all dress androgenously. It's only us old dressers that think we have to dress binary.:sad:

[Rhonda Jean]

Liz and April,
Shoulder bags and crossbody bags are common for men here, too. They tend to be more functional than pretty. When I first started carrying a purse I went directly to purses that left no doubt they were women's purses. Then I had a down period of dressing and quite carrying a purse or any other bag. As I've "recovered" I'm once again carrying a purse, but haven't completely regained full confidence. I've been stuck on a black MK tote for what seems like forever. Although I've never seen a male carrying a tote I'm tired of it and it's starting to seem manbag-ish, but I know if I carry something more feminine it'll probably stay in the car more.

[Michaela Jane]

There are many days that I don't dress fully, but many more days that I am dressed in all femme clothes. I look like society expects me to be.

[OrdinaryAverageGuy]

I've never dressed "fully", as I don't care for makeup really on anyone, and I have way too much hair to cram under a wig. But I often go out with little tells, such as a toe ring or anklet or painted toenails, I've been "caught" by delivery people in yoga shorts or colorful leggings (no comments so far), I often wear tanks or t-shirts out that are questionable, etc. I was also recently caught by my tenent who I didn't think was home wearing a miniskirt (he asked "are you wearing a kilt?" Why yes I am! (seriously, what's the difference?)

[Traci H]

I get few chances to dress fully. Like once or twice a year. But I chose to indulge in female clothes as much as possible without an angering my wife. My purse usage has been ramping up quite a bit lately. My wife doesn?t like it however, so I load it up after I get in the car. I too am guilty of leaving it in the car on occasion if I deem the venue might give me trouble. It?s all kind of a pain and I would love to up my usage to full time. If only to get my wife on board I love my female purses and would love to move to perhaps a floral purse. It all helps me get through those days of limited dressing.

[Natalie5004]

I remember when I had my long hair my wife and I went into a restaurant and we were greeted with a "Hi Ladies" from the staff. I kind of liked it. I was in boy mode.

[danniUK]

I often do the same, no wig or makeup... hell sometimes without shaving my stubble. The feeling from wearing just a few pieces of clothing is enough to make me feel feminine without going all the way.

[CDMargret]

I know and love this feeling too. I now for over a year have been dressing with no wigs, makeup etc. Just the clothing. I have attended a few event wearing my finest and had such wonderful times with many compliments on my legs. Oddly I do miss the wigs and the lovely long hair on my neck and shoulders. And I will be dolled up to the nines again soon I hope. But this going out with friends, of course in an excepting atmosphere, and being at home has just been incredible. Thank you for sharing this.