Finally getting out there

[jeri1973]

I?m 52 years old and I can?t keep suppressing who I really am. With that being said it?s time to finally live my life and live if with joy.

I?m kind of starting my journey for the 3rd time. I?ve been on and off HRT a couple times but due to job and mainly family I had to stop.

However my children are grown and now I?m at the point where I?m saying screw it, I?ve got to live my life.

I?ve been slowly shifting my wardrobe to more feminine clothes but ones that blend in. I work in a very conservative area where I know once I come out I?m fired immediately, it?s a religious institution so they can do that. That?s why I?m having to go slow. I?m also wearing other ladies attire on a regular basis, undergarments, jewelry, deodorant, perfume, my toenails are professionally pedicured and gel polished, ears pierced, etc.

When I?m away from work, I?m about 95% full time. I just haven?t been getting out in extremely feminine fashion when it comes to clothing. I have gone out in women?s shorts, jeans, t-shirts regularly. However, yesterday was a HUGE STEP FOR ME. I have a raw hem denim miniskirt (yes I?m 52 years old and wear a miniskirt) that hit me just below mid thigh. I put it own with a cute top, strappy sandals and headed straight for the local mall. Wow, it felt so right to be in there as myself.

My desired plan is to be full-time by January 1st and starting my ?official? RLE. However, I?ve been told by my therapist and a few others that I?m probably going to be there before January 1st.

So, I?m just hoping to be able to stay the course this time and I?m hoping you ladies who have been there can offer some encouragement and support along the way.

Thanks in advance.

Jeri

[Natalie5004]

Sounds like a plan. What do they say about plans?

I wish you the best of luck and I hope your best days are ahead of you.

[Adelaide]

Hope that the 3rd time works best for you. All the best on your journey.

[Maid_Marion]

Hi Jeri,

It may be easier to transition to full time if you obtain age appropriate clothes to wear.

Marion

[SaraLin]

Here's wishing you all the best, Jeri.

I know that the JOB issue can be a real problem. Have you figured out if/how you're going to manage when it's gone?

[Maid_Marion]

It is much easier to get a new job when you are still employed.

Marion

[Jeri Ann]

The OP asked for encouragement and support as she transitions.

Please keep in mind that this is the Transsexual Forum. Comments that would be appropriate for the Crossdressing section should be posted there. A review of the rules for this section might be helpful.

[April Rose]

52 seems young to retire. Do you have a financial plan should they fire you in January?

[Philippa Jane]

Hi Jeri.
April raises a good point around planning and finances.
It is a big step to take and if you are really set on it then your coming out will be exhilarating and scary at the same time.
One thing that I always had in mind was that I was prepared to lose friends and relatives. Even then it still came as a slap in the face when those who had been long time friends could not adjust.
I hope that those who know of Jeri will support you.
It did take me a number of months to make new connections but there are always people who will like you for who you are not what you are.
Of course you will always have friends here.

[JCDScottish]

Good luck to you, got to do whats best for you and makes you happy.

[jeri1973]

52 seems young to retire. Do you have a financial plan should they fire you in January?

I wish I could retire. I am in the process of talking with others about jobs that might be available in my career field that are affirming and accepting. I never realized that for someone in a conservative religious field that I could continue serving in a career that I love so much. I just hope that I can find something soon, though, so I can move along on my path and find something that pays close to what I am making now. With my education I have been told that I shouldn't have a problem by some others in online support groups and LGBTQ religious groups I have found.

[BustyOlivia]

Good for you Jerri! Do whatever you can to feel 100% who you know yourself to be. The dream I feel a lot of us have is to live as this part of ourselves at least once to let that side have a chance at being alive, at least for a moment (for some like me) or in your case, for who you know yourself to be. Good luck in your journey and trust your gut! Doctors have scanned trans women?s brains to show them resembling a female brain in many ways, so that?s why I trust my gut always, it?s part of my culture to do so too. So happy for you!

XoXOlivia

[Jeri Ann]

These posts remind me of when I was in Guadalajara for some procedures. I commented to Vicente, my host and caregiver at Rest and Recovery that, I must be the oldest person to ever be there. He said that he had a client that was 80 years old. She said that just one day as her authentic self would make it all worthwhile. The most difficult thing to live with is regret.