Kind of missing it

[Sandi Beech]

Well , it has been about 4 months since I had what may have been my final CD outing. I am still purging stuff and nearly done. I have to say I am missing it. It is hard for me not to notice my naturally big boobs when taking a shower etc., so even if I did not come here there will always be triggers that activate CD thoughts. I walked by the TV one day this week. The Price Is Right was on, and the model was wearing a slinky sequin mini, and I thought gee I want to look like that. Not going to happen, so I guess I will just have to dream about it now. I still have my pictures, I am not giving those up ; )

Those memories are priceless.

Sandi

[Karren H]

You had one hell of a run, girlfriend! I understand your situation but I am going to miss the stories and the photos you have shared with me over the years! Hopefully something will change and you can jump back into the game!!

[Traci H]

Sandi, I admire your resolve. I hope it continues well for you and your situation. I will say I did at one point give it up got two years, in the hopes of improving the situation between my wife and I. After two years I could take it no longer. Maybe you?ll just forget about it altogether!

Yes seeing a pretty dress or shoes can really be a big trigger however.

[Crissy 107]

Hi Sandi, There was no doubt that at some point you were going to miss it, I’m surprised it took this long. We all looked forward to your next trip and were never disappointed when you gave us the wrap up.
We can all hope that one day you hit the road again.

[docrobbysherry]

Sandi, when I first began dressing my house was filled with wife and kids. But, I so had to dress! Up dressing in the middle of the nite. In a closet at work. In motels on business trips. Even underdressed!:doh:

But, that wouldn't satisfy me now. Nor would it, u, I expect?:sad:

I don't know how u can dress to your satisfaction, but mark my words. If u don't find a way, resentment and frustration will build up and make u unhappy. Or worse!:sad:

[kimdl93]

You created some great memories and i am grateful that you chose to share some of them with us. I hope you have many new and amazing memories yet to come.

[Debs]

Sandi, I bloody told you so, we have had many a private conversation, welcome back on the road to recovery, lol love you Sandi, you dam well know how amazing you are when dressed. you put me to shame with your amazing presentation, go girl !!!

[TheHiddenMe]

Hold out that times may change. Or keep a small stash and figure out somewhere to wear something. Or sign up for Diva Las Vegas and I'll bring some of your stuff to wear for the week...just be creative.

Or as Dan Savage says, do what you have to to stay married and stay sane.

[AmyJordan]

Hi Sandi

You know we are all hoping your situation improves and the wild carefree Sandi is once again released, you are very inspirational.

Come back soon

Amy x

[Jillcder]

I know the feeling Sandi, since retiring my Crossdressing time has definitely taken a hit. Hopefully sometime in the near future your back at it wearing a little sequin mini dress and heels some things are just meant to be.

[Sandi Beech]

Thanks all. To be clear, missing it is not something new, it has been an ongoing theme in my head, but I am not going to fall apart over it. Docrobbysherry is correct though, after my past experiences , underdressing for example is just not going to do much for me.

Dee you while it is true my situation might change, I am not counting on it so there is no point of dwelling on false hopes. Besides, I suspect even an approving spouse would never approve of what I like to wear to clubs. Well maybe one exception here , Amy you listening ; )

Sandi

[CarlaWestin]

Well, I also compliment your resolve and that you still admire it and still come back here to hang out.
As Doc mentioned, there is always a work around if the desire is there.

[Natalie5004]

Sandi,

Maybe post a old photo once in a while. So we can still live vicariously through your past exploits.

[Sara Marshall]

Hey Sandi, just a thought, why not do a makeover service every once in a while to satisfy those needs. I know you like to go all out, so you could use all of their clothes, wigs accessories that you would need and then go out from there. I hate that I missed getting to hang out with you and crazy times going out.

[NancySue]

Hi Sandi, I, too, join those who admire your resolve and grit. I couldn?t do it. I think of you often hoping, someday some compromise can be reached. Thinking of you makes me more appreciative for what I have. Good luck.

[Sandi Beech]

Interesting idea Sara, but I do not see a way around my limitations since I am rarely going anywhere for work any more.

I think you would have had a blast if you could have worn your steampunk outfit to my fav club in FL. Your outings look great anyhow though. Keep em coming ; )

Sandi

[alwayshave]

Sandi, I understand your predicament, but we all knew you were going to miss it. I hope you find an outlet for your dressing needs.

[Stephanie47]

Please let us know how the lack of self expression is affecting your relationship with those around you. From what I have read on this forum over the years I get the impression a wife may have won and tamped down or eliminated her husband's self expression, but at what cost? I've said many times I can see no logical reason a male would emulate a woman when society casts down such negativity and rejection. I firmly concur with my PTSD counselor for ware related PTSD that each man and woman has some dna of the opposite sex within the dna chain. In some, it is more than others. I suppose, if a husband and wife fall on the societal norm of extremes everything is fine. However, when a wife is on one extreme of all things female, but her husband is not the polar opposite,conflict will arise.

[Maria 60]

If it makes you feel any better I could only dream of what you wore and what you did. Consider that a huge achievement in your life and hold these memories close. Life changes fast and you know the phrase “never say never”. You just never know what’s around the next corner for us. In the mean time I’m so happy your still here with us.

[Sandi Beech]

Thanks Maria, you stated exactly how I feel about it now.

I mostly joined this site to share my experiences after going out for a couple of years. That was about 6 years ago. Now that I do not have any new experiences, there is less to post about, but I do still like reading about others experiences.

Sandi

[Christie ann]

I can relate, our place in life has changed to where there isn’t any time for anything girlish with a non accepting spouse. No more work trips and the grand kids are now big enough that grandma isn’t on call anymore. It’s been a touch over two years since my last time out. Watch out for what doc said, sometimes I feel resentment bubbling up. I have to keep in mind the few adventures I did have, nothing compared to yours, but still fun for me.

I would imagine that there are more than a few of us in this particular demographic.

[Debbie Denier]

You always were going to miss it Sandi. Maybe small chances in the future. I do sympathise. My wife is thinking of partial retirement in October with a view to fully retiring next year.Looks like game over for me too.