Got hit on at Mary's last nite! Does this happen to u?

[docrobbysherry]

Hamburger Mary's is a gay club in Long Beach and last nite was their once a month T Girl Sat. Nite. Lot's of Admirers were there. However, I happen to be a a straight CD. :straightface:

As I age this happens less and less. It was memorable for a number of reasons:

He was a polite older gentleman with a cane. The oldest in memory ever to flirt with me. Maybe middle, late, 60's? Still younger than me, I'm 82. This has happened often in the past but normally it's guys in their 30's to 50's that come on to me!:o

He chatted me up outside in the smoking area first. Then, came up to me on the dance floor to flirt and offered to put some money in my boot!:eek:
I asked him not to and he left me alone after that. I watched him chatting much of the evening with the 3 pretty T dancers on stage. Giving them money, too. My T friend says he's a regular there. I think I've seen him there but we never spoke. Maybe he was desperate because so few attended last nite?:heehee:

Anyway, this made me wonder how many other T's and CD's have had unusual personal experiences with Admirers, men, etc. when out?:bs:

[Sandi Beech]

Yea I think most of those type are generally harmless, just lonely fellows. Of course some outright tell you what they want , chasers as we would put it. Then there are the very polite ones that just ask if they can buy a drink, but I have always declined as I always buy my own. I tip far better than most patrons do. A side benefit being they pay attention to me if they are smart.

So yes it has happened enough, but it has not caused me a problem to date. You do have to pay attention when leaving clubs as I had one guy try to follow me. I was laughing inside my head because he thought he was being so sly and I noticed him tailing me immediately. I took a little detour just to confirm, so I left with a group of about 8 others to have people around me just in case. It is partly because of the venues I have gone to. I mean outings to places like Taboo Masquerade Balls and what not are a bit wild to begin with so it is somewhat expected.

Of course as I think back, I was really surprised when I first started going out, and the bartender told me all my drinks were already paid for, but no one ever told me who. That was weird. Back in 2017. Fun times I had back then. The first outings like that are memorable.

Sandi

[Suzi Q]

Doc,

Back in 2011 my wife wasn't able to go with me to attend an eightieth birthday party for my sister that was a two hour drive from home. My son went with me and we had separate rooms (he doesn't know about me dressing). After the party I took him back to the hotel and I got dressed for an evening out. I talked with the night clerk and had her take some photos of me and she told me about where to go in Sedalia MO. that would be open late Saturday night.

I went to a two bars that were packed with with so many people that you couldn't even get next to the bar to order a drink and the music was too loud so I didn't stay. At the third bar I asked the bartender if there was any place in town that wasn't so crowded and noisy. While I was standing there I overheard a guy sitting at a nearby table with a girl tell his male friend standing next to him something about an Adams apple.


I walked out right after that and went straight to my car across the street. As I looked back towards the bar to pull out into the street the guy that was told to check out Adams apples had come out to the curb. He was standing there waving at me with his hand down by his side to attract MY attention without attracting too much attention. I just waved back to him as I pulled out from the curb and drove off.







It was around midnight and I was getting hungry and went to a diner to get something to eat. As I went up the steps I overheard a guy behind me descending the steps say to his female companion "Did you see HER". I hope he was talking about my height (6' + high heels).


Suzi Q

[Genifer Teal]

Don't read this the wrong way. I got hit on the very first time. I went out. It scared me back into the closet. For a year. I think it just comes with the territory. Women deal with it all the time

[Raychel]

This is definitely one of the reasons why I do not go out dressed.
If I were to go to a club and get hit on, that would give me a real creepy feeling.
I totally understand that women have to deal with this all the time.
I bet they don't like it sometimes as well. :thinking::thinking:

[chrissy111]

I've been hit on with my wife standing next to me.

[Marketa]

I've been hit on quite a few times. Mostly by men but also by 3 or 4 women. And I must say except one occasion when I felt less and less comfortable with the guy I enjoyed it every time.

With the uncomfortable guy when he went to toilet I went to a bar and joined in conversation with few people there.

But what was fun, he wasn't hitting on me at all but we spent over an hour at the bar talking about StarGate.

[Dutchess]

That's not being hit on. That's him showing appreciation for you and your total image. He doesn't know your financial status of course but he was paying you a tribute. That's not soliciting/propositioning you if that's what you meant . That was just a show of appreciation. Sometimes they get insulted a bit if you say no so I just let them. It's no big deal. I danced for allot of years before what I do now and that's common.

[docrobbysherry]

Sandi, one time a huge linebacker type guy about 30+ followed me back to my car at the far end of a parking building in Vegas at 3:00 AM. There was no one anywhere bear when he explained he REALLY wanted a BJ! I told him I wasn't interested and he let me drive away!:eek:

Raychel, I can't recall all the times I've been approached by men and T's. A few were drunk and pushy but no one was ever too physical or aggressive. Like GG women u just have to learn how to say, "No", so they get it!:sad:

Dutchess, on reflection? U may be rite! I don't know what he said to the dancers but he asked me no personal questions and didn't ask for anything for his money. Not even a dance!:straightface:

[Sallee]

I have been hit on several times usually it is just a simple no not interested and thats it. I was followed to the parking lot one night I realized stayed in a well lit area and went back to the club. Usually staff will accompany you if you ask.

[MissSixties]

Every single time i wear my 5" spike heel stilettos ..... i love ther attention but never more than kissing and oh that other time whoa

[Debs]

When in Blackpool, always get hit on, not a problem, they are always respectful, buy be a drink, always say , dont bother buying me one back, they are lovely, I suppose it the places you go

[docrobbysherry]

Every single time i wear my 5" spike heel stilettos ..... i love ther attention but never more than kissing and oh that other time whoa

I don't ever let them get that physical or let them buy me drinks. Because I know what men want and I don't want to owe them anything or lead them on!:o

Men r NOT satisfied with a kiss. I know how women have teased me and I didn't like it so I won't do that!:sad:

[TheHiddenMe]

I was at a casino in Southern Missouri. We had a Monday/Tuesday guys golf outing so I snuck out late and there was the casino about 20 minutes away.

I was skinnier at the time and fit into a dress (that I actually gave my wife years ago but she didn't want it anymore) and it only fits when I am lighter than usual. I thought I was looking pretty decent.

I was leaving about 1:15 AM (we got rained out the next day so I didn't have to worry about getting up early for golf) and a black guy asked me if I worked out and I answered "a lot". He then asked "are you into black guys?" and I answered "No. Not into guys." He took that answer and he went to his car and I went to mine.

Now I'm going to look up my post from the time and see how good my memory was...and I'll edit this and link it.

https://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?274416-More-than-a-golf-trip&highlight=

[alwayshave]

I have been hit on at a gay bar here in DC. A polite no took care of the issue. I did have my posterior grabbed at CD/trans meetup in Virginia while talking to a group of girls.

[docrobbysherry]

That happens to me all the time when I'm out among our regular T group and at big T events. They know I can't feel it even if they slap me hard!:tongueout

[Snide_lobster]

Somewhat often but not crazy. Had a few people offer to buy me drinks (and yes they were being flirty about it, but still very polite), but I usually decline (I just don’t drink much to begin with and was getting ready to head out). Some guys have directly propositioned me, and I respectfully declined. Only one guy has made me uncomfortable doing a side by feel of my tush, my reaction was a little silly though because I’m a fairly athletic young man even if my looks may otherwise be deceiving. I find it funny that it’s not uncommon for men to insult their own masculinity when I turn them down, a fair number of “well yours is probably bigger than mine anyways” or “you could probably take me out/beat me up anyways” kinda weird trend I guess.

I only know for certain one girl was actively flirting with me, boy do I wish I had played along with that a little more but ngl her directness kinda scared me, oh well I guess. Otherwise plenty of women have complimented me but I see no reason it’s anything more than, “you rock that skirt sister”.

[SaraLin]

I've been "hit on" twice. Both times when I was with a GG companion.

First time - it was a Halloween outing with first wife and her son. After trick or treat, we went to a pizza place. A worker there said he liked my costume and that he'd never been kissed by a witch and wanted one from me. NOT HAPPENING KID!

Second time - a outing with a GG friend at a gay bar (I was still too timid to mix in the general public). This guy was flirting real heavily with me and it would have been flattering if he hadn't kept insisting that he had a thing for drag queens, which was NOT the look I was going for.
Had he been willing to treat me as a woman, or better yet, a lady, who knows how the evening might have gone? But since everything he said reaffirmed that he was seeing a man wearing a dress, he immediately struck out. It's just as well, I guess. What he was looking for wasn't going to happen anyway.

[docrobbysherry]

Now that u mention it, SaraLin? I think that's all every single guy that hit on me wanted; me to kiss them. But, NOT on their cheek!:o

[Genifer Teal]

It's normal to some extent. It's also fair to have your boundaries respected. Women learn how to control these situations. Most of us have no experience. It's an eye opening experience to see what they go through.

[RachelR]

I have been hit on by men a few times while out at local gay bars. I have had good experiences and some not so good experiences. Typically there are a group of us girls so we will look out for each other.

[docrobbysherry]

Why, Rachel? Were u some place u felt threatened?:sad:

That happened to me in a Vegas parking building at 2 AM. We were out of sight of anyone and he was twice my size and less than 1/2 my age! Good thing he took "no" for an answer!:thumbsup:

[Cheryl T]

I can't say that I've ever been hit on while out.
I suppose it's a double edged sword. I don't know how I would have reacted.

[Amelie]

Yes, I get hit on by guys. How else would I meet a nice guy, A lady doesn't go up to a man.

I never got hit on in a gay bar. Seemed like they were never interested in me. I went to gay bars when a friend was performing there.

I use to go to trans bars where half or more of the customers were admirers. It was expected that guys would want to talk to some of the trans girls. I met some OK guys in these bars but most of the guys were sleezy. Also most of the guys went with the working girls.

When I went to dance clubs I'd always get hit on. But I don't really know if I would use the phrase "hit on". It was more like people who were having fun just talking to each other and if there was a spark between me and the other person then all the better. Never met an admirer in a dance club. Also one would have a better chance of meeting a guy with similar tastes in a dance club than at a trans bar.

Use to get hit on in the streets by either guys walking or guys cruising in their cars. I use to do a lot of walking and most bars and clubs back then were on dark lonely streets.

Nowadays I just run into the occasional bear or coyote, they are much nicer than an admirer.

[docrobbysherry]

U bring up an enteresting point, Amelie. Most of the T's I know who date men also date trans. And, I've been approached by as many T's as by men! However, there have only been 2 of the many I've met that seemed fem enuff to attract me. And, no, I didn't go there because "parts is parts"!:sad:
If they had been post op things mite have worked out different!:o