Mothers

[Maria 60]

While we were having a family dinner last night, a conversation came up and joking about some siblings things my children did when they were younger and we never found out and they never told us. During this there were a few stories that my wife also held from me of things they did not to unset me.
When the family left not that it was bothering me I trusted my wife's parenting but asked why she chose to deal with some things on her own and not tell me. The things in question were some pretty nothing things but I was curious. She told me when a women becomes a mother they become there children's biggest protector, that a mother will go through any extreme to protect her children. She then asked me wasn't there things that I did when I was younger and my mother never told my dad. My dresseing came to mind, I told my wife boy was I naive when I was younger. I don't know if I just wanted to block things out of my mind for whatever reason. I started to remember I had a drawer with pantyhose that I had stolen from niebours clothes lines or when visiting my girl cousins houses. Back then I would do the dirty deed wearing only the pantyhose and leave them and the mess in my drawer and at times I would find them washed and neatly put away. I never wondered if my mother or grandmother did it but my mind seemed like it blocked it out and never questioned it. My parents would go to our summer cabin and leave me with my grandparents and I would stay up late watching TV wearing pantyhose and my mothers slip. I would fall asleep on the couch and I would wake up at two or three in the morning and there would be a blanket on me. I never questioned where the blanket came from and never acted differently the next morning in front of my grandparents, almost again blocking this out of my mind. I guess I had the best grandmother ever because as far as I know she never told anyone and took it to her grave. Again being naive when I would take chances in the house, I would sit at my desk wearing my male t-shirt and only pantyhose underneath and watch my parents and grandparents walking by me not being able to see I was only wearing the pantyhose under the desk. One time they were all out in the garden and I would walk up and down the stairs taking these risks and on the way up there was my mother stairing at me wearing pantyhose and her red skirt. She just asked what I was doing and I ran to my room and she was trying to open the door to see me. She asked me why, and I told her I didn't know. I put everything back and nothing was never said about it again. I told my wife I thought my mother was loyal like my grandmother but I won't talk about it now but years later my father confronted me about something my mother told him about the dressing that led to us not talking for 10 years.
I guess it's true about when a women becomes a mother, I'm sure my mother didn't give my father full details about the pantyhose and seeing me in her red skirt because he was old school and I think he would have physicality beat the dressing out of me. She must have given him a softer version of what she seen.
What I believe was the starting point of my crossdressing was when I was sharing room with my sister and she was a slob. One morning there was a pair of pantyhose hanging on my foot board and that was the first time I recollect I tried on pantyhose and it must have been the 4th of July because all I remember there were fireworks in my head that morning. A few weeks later I thought my sister went to school and I picked up a pair of pantyhose and starting going to town with them, all at once she came back in the room looking for those pantyhose but she must have known I was wearing her things because she instantly started asking me where her pantyhose were. She pulled off my sheets and I was fully erected wearing her pantyhose, she just stood there staring for a few moments and then left angry and told me I might as well keep them. She must have told my mother because a little while later my father built a bedroom for me in the basement and again nothing was said to me. I'm sure my father didn't know the reason why my mother suggested to make me my own room.
Well I guess my mother and grandmother protected me and I can't even amagine what they were thinking though all of this and never calling me out. My mother is in her early 90s now and for some reason a few years back I wanted to confont her about this but my wife told me maybe at her age to just leave it alone. But still at times I'm still curious what she thought and why she never confronted me about it.
Anyone else here have any mother stories

[Genifer Teal]

My mother told me she never wants to talk about it again, unless i'm giving it up. We don't talk about it.

[Ivan_1974]

I think that generally mothers know everything about their sons/daughters even if they were not told about everything concerning them. When I was in my 30s and I was left by my ex girlfriend I remember my mother was the most confortable person next to me (I lost my father when I was 14) and we talked about many things and I confessed her that I liked to crossdressed since I was 11. She said me that she knew I liked to wear her underwear, skirts and so on as she found many times dresses rummeged in her drawers but she never told me anything about this probably because she had never seen this aspect as a problem or something to be rectified.

[char GG]

I think mothers/wives know way more than kids or husbands think that they know. They pick up on tiny details without being snoopy.

[JesseVF]

I?m starting to think my mother knew about me. Although I think I was extremely careful in putting her things back I place I used them often enough that it?s likely she caught on, although never said anything. She did catch me once playing with my sisters bathing suit. I was actually with some friends and seeing if they would join me! That seems totally crazy to me now remembering that. She just told me later to stay away from those and I doubt said anything to my father.

[Monique65]

I’m fairly certain my mother knew but never said anything. Once, she came very close to catching me in my sister’s stockings and heels. I heard her coming and raced across the hall to my room leaving a heel in the hallway. When she entered my room, I was sitting on my bed with the leg that still had a stocking on it tucked under the bed. She looked at me quizzically but never mentioned it.

[susan jackson]

Two very different takes on the theme of 'Mother'

Kate Bush (from the 1985 LP 'The Hounds Of Love')


"She knows that I've been doing something wrong
But she won't say anything
She thinks that I was with my friends yesterday
But she won't mind me lying
Because
Mother stands for comfort
Mother will hide the murderer"

Pink Floyd (from the 1979 LP 'The Wall')


"Hush now, baby, baby, don't you cry
Mamma's gonna make all of your nightmares come true
Mamma's gonna put all of her fears into you
Mamma's gonna keep you right here, under her wing
She won't let you fly, but she might let you sing
Mamma's gonna keep baby cozy and warm

Ooh, babe, ooh, babe, ooh, babe
Of course Mamma's gonna help build the wall"

Luckily my mum fell into the first category

[alwayshave]

Maria, I have told this story before. About 20 years ago, I was out to dinner with my mother. We talked about a ton of stuff. At some point she asked me if I still crossdressed. I said yes. She then asked another non-related question. She never brought it up again.

[Debbie Denier]

My mother found pantyhose in my bedroom drawer as a teenager. When confronted I told her they were for a fancy dress party. I also tore her black slip. Nothing was said.

In my 20s my father found a dress , a wig, high heels and pantyhose . Hidden in a record case I forgot to lock. My mother mentioned it to me . Told me to get rid. Lied to my father that they were hers. Of course he didn?t believe her as they were size 9.Told my father it was a phase I was going through.

After my wife discovered my femme stash and forced me to purge; I confided in my mother. She allowed me to keep a wardrobe at her home. I dressed there at weekends for 10 years until she sadly passed away aged 92.

A mothers love is unconditional as proven in my case. I confessed all to my mother. She got used to me being dressed . She was fine as she thought it was helping me which it was.She even bought me tights at Christmas and on my birthday. The only thing she refused to do was call me by my femme name Debbie.

You never know Maria. If you approach your mother sensitively and honestly. She might answer your questions.Even if she cant stand CD . You can always put it down to a phase when you were younger . You could tell her you grew out of it when you married if she disapproves. I would omit the doing the dirty deeds.

[JulieC]

Maria, you have an amazing wife. I respect her opinion. However, in this case...I'm not going to say she's wrong, but you really need to think this through. Once your mother passes, that door will forever close. You will never be able to have that conversation. Consider those consequences. If you can be ok with that, then don't bring it up. If you think there's a fair chance you'll regret not talking with her, then take the opportunity while you have it. The clock is ticking.

As for my mother, she's long passed. She knew, only because she found my small stash of pantyhose when I was 13. She took them, and then gave me a loooong, harsh lecture against what I was doing. We never discussed it again. It taught me to hide my stash better. In virtually all other respects, my mother was absolutely amazing, so I really have no complaint. I just wish she had handled that differently.

[tiffyjo]

I may be reading my thoughts about what I experienced incorrectly, but I have a feeling that my mother played a huge part in my dressing. I have seen some pics of me when I was really young. Like in the 2 to 5 years old and wearing what appeared to possibly be a little skirt and a frilly top. When I was about 8-9 she had an hanging basket type thing in my upstairs bedroom closet to keep old towels, washcloths, and quite a few old cloth diapers. Just thinking about it, this hanging basket may have actually been for storing cloth diapers after they were washed. She would often tell me to go get a rag out of that hanging bag and one time I found a stack of her old panties all washed and neatly stacked in it. I grabbed one of them and sat it aside, yes it was exciting, and got a different rag and took it down to her. That night I tried those panties on and I was hooked.

She would have me take clean laundry into my parents bedroom and instructed me where to place the items and I was always seeing panties, bras, girdles and nylon hose. Many times there would be a bra laying on the back of a chair and panties on the arm of the chair. I didn't realize it then, but thinking about it now, I really have to wonder. I can remember her sending me up to that hanging basket thing in my upstairs closet many times, even into when I was in high school and a couple of times I found some of her old nighties.

She has been gone for about 20 years and she now would have been in her early 80's. I think if she were still alive I would ask her if she planned it and if it was her intention to cause that in me. We had a great relationship and I think she wouldn't judge me for wearing panties and a bra almost everyday now.

[Rachel05]

When I was younger with no money to buy my own clothes, it was my mum and sister who were the donors of my lingerie, of course they didn't know, or so I thought and for years I was naive enough to think that my mum didn't know, I am not sure my sister ever knew, if she did she hasn't ever said anything
There came a day when my mum had been shopping and she showed me the lingerie she had bought and to be fair she used to buy very nice and pretty things, I wondered why she was showing me and at the same time thinking oh boy, I can't wait to try them, she asked me if I liked them and I was a bit shy, but said, yes of course I liked them, then the penny dropped, of course she knew, how did I ever think she wouldn't and that was her way of letting me know she knew and actually she was okay with it
As time went past, the family came along and I never told my wife, we were due to move house and my mum rang me one day to tell me to be careful when moving and make sure "my things" were kept out of sight, I think that qualifies for a mum looking after her boy

[sara66]

I am certain that my mother knew. I am also certain she never told my dad, while he would have never flew off the handle, he would have had a "talk" with me.
I discussed this with a friend of mine, she also thought my mother would have been very supportive. This thread really makes me miss my mom. I wish I could have had a conversation with my mom. Sometimes I wonder if my mom thought I was gay. I was a very late bloomer. I have only date 2 women and the first one I was 28 and the second time I was 38 (she is now my wife).
Sara :battingeyelashes:

[SaraLin]

Well, I've told all these stories before, but since they fit so well with this thread, here goes...

One Halloween, my mom dressed me up as a girl. I was thrilled, but it was just that once.

Another time, she found some of my sister's things hidden in my bed. Not a big deal, she just said not to do that.

Later on ln life, while visiting, I forgot and left a nightie behind. Next visit, I found it cleaned and folded on the bed.

Even later in life, I finally 'came out' to her about always wanting to be female. Her response was just "Oh. I thought you were going to say you were gay." That was it. No drama, no fireworks. It was about as big a deal as if I'd told her that I liked pizza.

So yes, she knew and still loved me.
For a whole host of reasons, she never met (or even saw) me as Sara - but I believe she would have been OK with it.
She's gone now, so I'll never know for sure.

[Bea_]

I didn't dress until my fifties. My mother would not have been supportive or understanding. My dad would have been worse. Oddly, my father was never particularly manly, but had hard lines on certain cultural things. In the seventies, he actually thought that men with long hair were gay. I let my hair grow to waist length in my late teens early twenties and I think it was much just to prove him wrong. I cut my hair to a regular man's haircut later and kept it short until my fifties. I haven't had hair shorter than my shoulders since 2006.

One thing I have to say is that my mom, nor my sister, ever wore anything that I'd have been jealous of. After I married, I admired my wife's wardrobe immensely. I did try on a few things over the first few decades out of curiosity, but never with a desire to wear those things long term.

[kimdl93]

I know my mother found at least one item I had though I had cleverly hidden under my pillow. She never said a word about it.

[susan2010]

I think my mother knew I regularly wore her slips and other items. She caught me once when I was very young with my sister's petticoat. She had to notice her slips and pettipants were moved around and worn, but she never said anything. If she had told my father, I would have been beaten.

[DAVIDA]

Maria, my mother did not know....until I told her.
My daughter and I had been shopping, and I bought a skirt that wasn't as short as I liked.
My mother was a whiz with a sewing machine, so I took it over and told her about my crossdressing.
After telling her, I asked her to shorten the skirt.:heehee:
The only thing she said was not to make it a habit. The sewing thing, not the crossdressing.
We actually went shopping together when she wanted me to take her to a favorite store.:)
She looked for her things, and I looked for my things.
I helped her find a bra in a Walmart once too.
I never told my father, but I believe he was the very first person to know.
When I lived at home, theirs, I had my own phone in my bedroom.
I was taking a shower one morning and when I went back to my room, I saw that my white high heels that were on the bed, was half covered with the sheet.
My phone had rung while was showering, and he answered it, why I don't know.:straightface:
Nothing was ever said about it, but I think he wanted me to know that he knew.

[Raychel]

My mother found a stash I had when I was younger.
I was firmly told to return the items. That was mostly the end of of discussion.
Until many years later. I was having a discussion with her and we got on the topic of crossdressing my brother in law and my uncle were both Cross-Dressers. That is when I took her to a more private setting. (We were in a cafeteria of a hospital)
At that point I told her about myself. She said "I thought is was you brother"
That all made me wonder about my brother's.
At that point my wife knew so the cat was mostly out of the bag.

So over the years she knew and it really was not a big deal at all for her.
To the best of my knowledge she never actually saw me dressed.
I am sure she would have been accepted if she had seen me

[Diedre]

My mother used me as a dress dummy for her sewing business. When I started leaving the supporting under garments on a little too long after the fitting, I was replaced by a dress form she got from a second hand shop. So, yes, she definitely suspected I had those inclinations.

[JennniferMcC]

Looking back, I think it's impossible that my mother didn't know. But she never said a word. I kind of wish she had. I know she would have been accepting. Maybe I would have come out of my shell. Too late now.

[OrdinaryAverageGuy]

I'm positive my mother never had a clue, or I would have been bounced between a shrink and a pastor. Even in jest, the idea of a male wearing female clothes sickens her. A friend's older brother took us trick or treating one year and wore a dress etc, my mother thought it was sick, demented, gross, and anything else you can think of, almost didn't let me go with them. So no, she doesn't know and I'll never tell her.

[Crissy 107]

I am pretty close to sure my Mom did not know as I think she would have not liked it and definitely said something

[HollyGreene]

My mother didn't like anything that didn't fit into her very Victorian conventions. If she had known that I was a crossdresser, I would have been completely disowned. I know this because of her reactions to other things in my life:
At university I had an Indian girlfriend. When my mother found out, I was told that I was not to bring her home.
My first wife had a son from a previous marriage. I was asked "Why are you bringing up somebody else's kid? Where's his real father?" My response soon shut her up; "He died when the boy was 2 years old".
One of my mother's friends had a daughter who started dating a black guy. I thought my mother was going to explode. Her friend, who had similar attitudes, was in tears over it.

[kimmy p]

My mother started me in dresses at 5 years old, as punishment. If she had ever figured out that I grew to like dresses she would have had a cow.

[Stephanie47]

"Anyone else here have any mother stories?"

My parents were homophobic to the core. Once, when sitting in the back seat of the family car on the way to my grandparents' home the car in front of us had the male driver and male passenger sitting on the bench style seat (remember those?) with the passenger's arm around the drivers shoulder. Ugly words. That being said I know my parents suspected I was trying on my mother's clothes because I snapped the strap to her one and only black bra. I put it back and waited for the axe to fall. I was never confronted but they tried to catch me in the act. They almost did. I am positive if I was caught I would tossed out of the house. My mother did make the comment once that her can of hair stray seemed to be getting empty too fast. I learned early that one does not poke the bear, if one wants to fly under the radar. Don't mess with a woman's clothes, get your own.

[Charlotte Sparkle]

I was very close to my Mum but sadly I never got to tell her about my alter ego as she died in her early forties.
She did know about my high heel collection though, I was about 18 when I told her about it and I'm sure she probably knew there and then that I was different.

[jjjjohanne]

My mom is still around. I have seriously considered talking to her about it ever since I read where Stana from femulate.org talked about wishing that she had talked with her mom...

[Sabine7]

I am quite sure my mother had to have a lot to do with evolving my female side. For the whole period of my childhood and puberty we were very close to each other. I guess she unintentionally impressed me and influenced me such a way that I subconciously decided to be like her.