I'm confused

[Jennaie]

Well, I'm not confused any more.

[RenaCD]

Jennaine my Friend you are looking with your eyes and your mind and not your Heart as your best friend is.
I can hear that you are worried for your friend,be carful that you are not worrying for him enstead as a friend but as the other Women in his life, was I reading too much into what you said in your Post?

Your Friend Rena :hugs:

[Maria D]

Shocked with mixed feelings? Perhaps you are learning about yourself too.

As to the situation, what you see as an outsider isn't what your friend is seeing. I think my fiancee is an absolute stunner of a GG but others might not. She thinks I'm a beauty too, but I don't. Indeed I avoided going out tonight to a gig because I feel too s**t about myself today.
So, your friend is indeed seeing a beautiful stunner, because that's what love does, and if he sees that, then it is so. Eye of the beholder and all that.
As to whether she's a transexual, you'll expect me to say this: does it matter? Look-wise she could just be a butch looking woman (it might even upset her) or yes, she could be TS. Your friend might already know that if she's open about her past, or he may not if she prefers to keep it secret. Frankly, though I'm of the 'open' type, I fully understand and support any TS who desires stealth, and from my point of view she's a woman whether GG or not, so don't see any problem with your friends situation, either way. She has the right to 'be' the woman she is, if that's what she wants, without being seen negatively because she was born with a male body and the pain that went with that.

That's just my opinion and I'm not confused about it, but I'm interested in why you are. In no way do I criticise you for your feelings, I assume it's because you care for your friend. Does some confusion arise because you feel negative about TS issues at all, and you fear your friend will be hurt if he finds out because he will see her being TS as a bad thing?

Of course, all that hinges on whether this lady is TS or not, and you may never find out.

Take care :)

[btmgrl6]

You said that you are attracted to your friend. Is it possible that that the "the little green monster " might be poking it's head out?
Is or was the attraction two ways?

Steph

[Kristen Kelly]

One thing I do while out is to look at the GG's and how they dress and carry themselves, what I see as a beauty you might see as a over made up floozy. Some women have a natural beauty and others its deep within, many beauties loose it with age while their inner beauty grows. It was said more than once,"Beauty is in the eye of the beholder"

There is someone out there for each and everyone.:hugs: :love:

[Joy Carter]

A nice name for a nice person, you do show compassion here for your friend and for his new girl I totally understand. My experience with getting hit on by a gay guy just shocked the heck out of me. I have no real idea how I would feel if I fell in love with someone who turned out to be male. I do support gender variant people but I can understand where you are coming from.

[FionaAlexis]

Hi Jennaie,

As my granny used to say - don't jump to confusions. I think I've been in a couple of situations where I've assumed something was out of the ordinary amiss only to feel embarrassed when I was wrong. So I'd tread warily - in fact don't interfere. Just be there if it all goes pear shaped.

I think there is a possibility that you still harbour some feelings towards you friend and there is a bit of 'OMG if he likes her - maybe if I'd been more open about myself....' What do you think?

Fiona xx

[Toyah]

All I can say is dont go there, beauty is definatly in the eye of the beholder to quote an old cliche. What you see is not what your friend see's I have many friends who love their wifes and while I like them I cannot see the spark. I think this is definatly a case of dont jump to conclusions

[purple_spider GG]

Hi
First of all you need to bear in mind the old saying "Beauty is in the eye of the beholder" and what is attractive to you is not the same as what is attractive another. Love and attraction are subjective and one person's floor is another person's ceiling there are no absolutes.

Secondly I can understand that you are concerned your friend may be lead astray into embarking on a relationship with a TS who is stealth but surely this is her perogative? You should not be the one to out her but perhaps you should talk to her and suggest that deceit is not the best course of action. On the other hand do you know for certain she is TS? What if she is a genuine GG but because you do not see her as attractive and feminine you have two and two together and come up with seven?

You do not have evidence to proceed with any outing and even if you did you cannot be the one to do it. I would leave it and let events unfold of their own accord.

Hugs
debs
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

[btmgrl6]

I agree with fiona ........let the chips fall where they may, just be there if he falls.

Steph

[FionaAlexis]

I have saved his life more than once and he has done the same for me. I think this is the reason I feel so close to him.

Ok! I can understand why you have such a tight bond and feel more protective.

Fiona xx

[RenaCD]

Jenniae Dear Your Heart is Showing!! :hugs: