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View Full Version : question for the ftm's about dateing



CharlaineCadence
05-11-2006, 10:57 PM
I wanted to ask you boys something.

I have a gg friend who just ended a relationship with a ftm who seemed really nice when she met him. It was after two weeks of them dating that he told her he was ftm. But he changed about a week ago when it seemed like their relationship was going to get serious. He got real well sterotypical male on her. I mean as in the whole patting her on the bottem in frount of friends, Trying to control her, and calling her the b word and other colourfull words at times as his terms of endearment, kept wanting to know when she was going to let him hit it! ( you know what he ment) and even tried to make her do his chores and stuff. Finally she had enough and told him to get out of her life.

My question is this.
Is this this how some ftm's react to their fears of being accepted as a man. Was it him just trying to be manly? or was this ftm just a really bad apple and i'm worried for my friend over nothing.

also Is it like the cindarella syndrom we mtf get when we are treated like a real woman for the first time? I honestly can not say i met this person because this happened in baltamore and I only learned this today through yahoo messenger.

thanks for your input. i'm just worried about my friend

Abraxas
05-11-2006, 11:25 PM
Well, I can't speak for other guys of course, but I think you're probably right-- this guy probably was either just a manipulative jerk to begin with, or finally being treated like a man went to his head (of course, that would also make him a jerk, just not a manipulative one).
I'm gonna go with bad seed on this one.

CharlaineCadence
05-11-2006, 11:34 PM
thanks reall calmed me down alot i was kind of worried.

btw Abraxas any one tell you how what a good looking man you are

Abraxas
05-12-2006, 03:26 AM
No problem.
And, *blushes* thanks :)

mistunderstood
05-12-2006, 06:23 AM
I think the guys being a jerk. Domestic abuse is high in Gay lesban and transgendered community.

CharlaineCadence
05-12-2006, 08:18 AM
ok that i honestly did not know

CaptLex
05-12-2006, 09:14 AM
IMy question is this. Is this this how some ftm's react to their fears of being accepted as a man. Was it him just trying to be manly? or was this ftm just a really bad apple and i'm worried for my friend over nothing.
This burns me because guys like this can give us all a bad name. :Angry3: As the others pointed out, the guy is just a jerk. Maybe he had negative male role models in his life growing up and really has no clue what a real man is supposed to be, but I would say he's the exception and not the rule (thank God!).

There are men like this and so I suppose there are transmen (or FtMs) like this. There are just always going to be a**holes in the world, male or female, gay or straight, trans or non-trans. It takes all kinds. Hope things work out for your friend, Charlaine.

Adam
05-12-2006, 11:19 AM
he sounds to me like he lacs respect maybe its his own way of makeing himself feels beeter and stand out as a guy more but its still very wrong and not on i think she did the right thing getting away from him maybe now he will learn to respect and treat his next girlfreind the way he should have from the start

sorry had to say the above as its uppsetting to hear about guys like that :mad:

CharlaineCadence
05-15-2006, 02:15 AM
I allowed my friend to read this thried ( hope you dont mind ) last night while she was in state for a viset. It made her feel so much better knowing that not every ftm was like that and she hopes to meet another someday. She hasn't seen hide or hair of him since she told him to leave. and she sends her thanks to all of you.
kiss kiss
char

Oh and by the way not going to name all the names but she also says that many of you are really hot looking fellas.

CaptLex
05-15-2006, 08:55 AM
she sends her thanks to all of you.
Happy to help, Char. :)