Nameless For Now
05-15-2006, 07:12 AM
My experience
(new so please excuse any misuse of terms).
Yesterday was the first time I had considered searching for CD sites, and I'm quite pleased I did.
Now, in my early 30's I am coming to terms with certain aspects of my life, and had a bit of a revelation yesterday. I know it will be helpful for myself to get my thoughts out and written down I thought others may also be interested. It's long and hopefully not too boring, but it is sincere and heartfelt.
I don't know if I would be classified as a man-in-a-dress or a (very) partial CD, but wearing women's clothes is something I've enjoyed occasionally over a number of years, though much less so recently, for reasons I will go into.
I was alone yesterday, and had a strong feeling to dress, something I haven't done in over a year. I was at home, alone, as fully dressed as I get, listening to music, and feeling very comfortable, and wondering 'Is this really so bad' - ('No' of course).
My experience of CD issues / life is closely linked to heterosexual-relationships with girlfriends.
(I had experimented very fleetingly wearing a female swimming costume as a teenager , but that was all).
I consider myself to be fairly sensitive and open-minded, and have never like 'laddish / macho' male behaviour or attitudes towards women, (or anti-TV/TS or homophobic behaviour etc) , etc. As a person I do have some sensitive (considered feminine) character traits, but my normal appearance is very masculine.
I bought my own first dress at a music festival, amongst close friends of both sexes and with a girl who I had some feelings for, she had bought one and suggested I to try it on. I did, and everyone said how good it looked, so I brought one. Matching but in a different colour scheme, it is a detailed indian pattern slip dress with thin shoulder straps, which though subtle in daylight glows brightly under ultra-violet lights. (So was very visible in the dance music events I would go to).
I am naturally a shy person, and am very interested in alter-egos, and the way putting one's self out there in a different mode off dress can alter the invidual's behaviour and the way other react / interact.
I would wear the dress to clubs and house parties, (sometimes we'd go in our matching dresses), sometime with trousers underneath, sometime bared legged, very much 'a man in a dress'. I later bought a choker, but never really considered makeups, wigs or underwear.
The response was pretty much very positive, and any occasional sniggers or questions as to my sexulaity were very easy to ignore, with (at times) a number of very attractive girls fussing over me. There were those who thought I was gay, but that didn't bother me, and I don't take being called 'gay ' to be an insult, just their ignorance.
My circle of friends (which included a number of bi-people & lesbians and a cultural diverse group) was very supportive, and these were very positive times, with girls lending me outerwear, and discussing possible looks.
I also found many woman to find the 'man-in-a-dress' look very attractive.
I was wearing my dress in a busy public, mixed club the night I met my present girlfriend, who after 7 happy years together is very much my life partner, and I know my wearing a dress helped the initial attraction (she could see the open-minded aspects, etc). She has bi-tendencies, but has not had any involvement with women, since we have been together, and finds me very sensitive, and has said that she hadn't imagined finding a man who could fulfil her sensitive female needs.
When I am wearing the dress (I would say I wear a dress and some accessories rather than cross dress per se, there is no attempt to be convincing or rarely to wear a full outfit), she does sometimes call me her 'special girl', and does sometime apply a little bit of make up, and some lipstick and we kiss, which is a very warm experience. I did also have a long blue wig, but I don't feel comfortable going 'half way'.
While I would be interested to have a proper makeover, my eyebrows are thick and and chin stubbly, I am a very particular person with a high level of attention to detail and appearance. I personally wouldn't want to be 'unconvincing', and don't have the time, or the inclination to go to those lengths. There are some convincing CDs who I do find extremely attractive, perhaps some of which is to do with the amount of effort, and attention to detail, and often simple good dress sense…
I don't really desire meeting up with CDs, as it's a personal shared little thing with my girlfriend, and something she knew about from our first meeting, never a secret. I don't feel I have to go anywhere to dress. I could walk around the house in my dress anyday and she wouldn't mind. Although CD is not a large part of my life, I know I am lucky to have her and her support. (I did have a girlfriend in the past who was shocked to see me wearing nail polish).
I had one other dress, and I have some worn my girlfriends underwear and shoes around the house, usually in her presence. Apart from going to clubs and house parties, I feel no desire for public Cding or to walk down the road cross-dressed, but do have admiration for those who do, and those who choose to live cross dressed.
Grayson Perry, the Turner Prize winning artist has been quite an inspiration to me.
I actually became quite self conscious for a time, unrelated to CD, when I had a facial piercing, and short cut hair and would frequently get abuse in the street, often of a homophobic nature. The area I live in is racially diverse, sadly most of the abusive comments / homophobic insults came from West Indian men.
I now really only wear womens clothes when we have returned from going to clubs or parties, unwinding in the comfort of our own home, in tender moments, and moments which can be sexual charged.
My old friends know, because they have seen me wearing dresses, it's no secret to new friends or anyone else really. I tend not to associate with narrow-minded people.
I have also tried on my mother's clothes, without her knowledge, my old bedroom at my parents is full of them so it's very easy to do, and she has some many very nice tasteful dresses that I feel suit my built 'in the female'. I am slim and muscular an am happy with my physique, both 'male' and in the dresses I choose and try on.
I do love glamorous women, and stocking and heels, I like feminity, and have also wondered about the fascination for '****ty' CD ing.
I may write more later, and have enjoyed reading the threads on this forum!
(new so please excuse any misuse of terms).
Yesterday was the first time I had considered searching for CD sites, and I'm quite pleased I did.
Now, in my early 30's I am coming to terms with certain aspects of my life, and had a bit of a revelation yesterday. I know it will be helpful for myself to get my thoughts out and written down I thought others may also be interested. It's long and hopefully not too boring, but it is sincere and heartfelt.
I don't know if I would be classified as a man-in-a-dress or a (very) partial CD, but wearing women's clothes is something I've enjoyed occasionally over a number of years, though much less so recently, for reasons I will go into.
I was alone yesterday, and had a strong feeling to dress, something I haven't done in over a year. I was at home, alone, as fully dressed as I get, listening to music, and feeling very comfortable, and wondering 'Is this really so bad' - ('No' of course).
My experience of CD issues / life is closely linked to heterosexual-relationships with girlfriends.
(I had experimented very fleetingly wearing a female swimming costume as a teenager , but that was all).
I consider myself to be fairly sensitive and open-minded, and have never like 'laddish / macho' male behaviour or attitudes towards women, (or anti-TV/TS or homophobic behaviour etc) , etc. As a person I do have some sensitive (considered feminine) character traits, but my normal appearance is very masculine.
I bought my own first dress at a music festival, amongst close friends of both sexes and with a girl who I had some feelings for, she had bought one and suggested I to try it on. I did, and everyone said how good it looked, so I brought one. Matching but in a different colour scheme, it is a detailed indian pattern slip dress with thin shoulder straps, which though subtle in daylight glows brightly under ultra-violet lights. (So was very visible in the dance music events I would go to).
I am naturally a shy person, and am very interested in alter-egos, and the way putting one's self out there in a different mode off dress can alter the invidual's behaviour and the way other react / interact.
I would wear the dress to clubs and house parties, (sometimes we'd go in our matching dresses), sometime with trousers underneath, sometime bared legged, very much 'a man in a dress'. I later bought a choker, but never really considered makeups, wigs or underwear.
The response was pretty much very positive, and any occasional sniggers or questions as to my sexulaity were very easy to ignore, with (at times) a number of very attractive girls fussing over me. There were those who thought I was gay, but that didn't bother me, and I don't take being called 'gay ' to be an insult, just their ignorance.
My circle of friends (which included a number of bi-people & lesbians and a cultural diverse group) was very supportive, and these were very positive times, with girls lending me outerwear, and discussing possible looks.
I also found many woman to find the 'man-in-a-dress' look very attractive.
I was wearing my dress in a busy public, mixed club the night I met my present girlfriend, who after 7 happy years together is very much my life partner, and I know my wearing a dress helped the initial attraction (she could see the open-minded aspects, etc). She has bi-tendencies, but has not had any involvement with women, since we have been together, and finds me very sensitive, and has said that she hadn't imagined finding a man who could fulfil her sensitive female needs.
When I am wearing the dress (I would say I wear a dress and some accessories rather than cross dress per se, there is no attempt to be convincing or rarely to wear a full outfit), she does sometimes call me her 'special girl', and does sometime apply a little bit of make up, and some lipstick and we kiss, which is a very warm experience. I did also have a long blue wig, but I don't feel comfortable going 'half way'.
While I would be interested to have a proper makeover, my eyebrows are thick and and chin stubbly, I am a very particular person with a high level of attention to detail and appearance. I personally wouldn't want to be 'unconvincing', and don't have the time, or the inclination to go to those lengths. There are some convincing CDs who I do find extremely attractive, perhaps some of which is to do with the amount of effort, and attention to detail, and often simple good dress sense…
I don't really desire meeting up with CDs, as it's a personal shared little thing with my girlfriend, and something she knew about from our first meeting, never a secret. I don't feel I have to go anywhere to dress. I could walk around the house in my dress anyday and she wouldn't mind. Although CD is not a large part of my life, I know I am lucky to have her and her support. (I did have a girlfriend in the past who was shocked to see me wearing nail polish).
I had one other dress, and I have some worn my girlfriends underwear and shoes around the house, usually in her presence. Apart from going to clubs and house parties, I feel no desire for public Cding or to walk down the road cross-dressed, but do have admiration for those who do, and those who choose to live cross dressed.
Grayson Perry, the Turner Prize winning artist has been quite an inspiration to me.
I actually became quite self conscious for a time, unrelated to CD, when I had a facial piercing, and short cut hair and would frequently get abuse in the street, often of a homophobic nature. The area I live in is racially diverse, sadly most of the abusive comments / homophobic insults came from West Indian men.
I now really only wear womens clothes when we have returned from going to clubs or parties, unwinding in the comfort of our own home, in tender moments, and moments which can be sexual charged.
My old friends know, because they have seen me wearing dresses, it's no secret to new friends or anyone else really. I tend not to associate with narrow-minded people.
I have also tried on my mother's clothes, without her knowledge, my old bedroom at my parents is full of them so it's very easy to do, and she has some many very nice tasteful dresses that I feel suit my built 'in the female'. I am slim and muscular an am happy with my physique, both 'male' and in the dresses I choose and try on.
I do love glamorous women, and stocking and heels, I like feminity, and have also wondered about the fascination for '****ty' CD ing.
I may write more later, and have enjoyed reading the threads on this forum!