I told one of my friends...

[jenny_cheerleader]

Hey ladies, i could use some of your insight. I told one of my friends who is gay (so i figured he woud accept me ) about me dressing. and he had the following responce.

"Honestly though, cross dressing is typically a gay thing.....and I've neer heard of straight guys doing it. Not to toss a wrench into your thoughts, but you might wanna look at that." (I'm not gay)

Now I know thats not true, but im not quite sure what to tell him. please give me your thoughts on what i should tell him. Thanks.

[Caitlintgsd]

CD'ing has nothing to do with sexual orientation. You'll find straight, bi and gay cds. Same goes for Ts' as well. Not everybody wants a guy in their life. Gender and orientation aren't linked.

[Rachael Warren]

As far as I know the incidence of gay people among crossdressers is the same as it is for all males.

[Marla S]

Now I know thats not true, but im not quite sure what to tell him. please give me your thoughts on what i should tell him. Thanks.

Talk about what it means/feels to be gay.

[Tracy_Victoria]

Tell him as there are str8 guy's, there are gay Guys, as the are Str8 Tv's there are also gay ones. it maybe that most of the contacts he has had with TV's has been with gay ones. Hence his view has been slightly clouded by the circles he moves in. (nothing strange in that. if you spoke to the avarage guy in the street (hetro) he'd probably draw the same conclution due to his knowledge of the subject!)

[Julia Cross]

It's time to educate him. It's that simple. If he refuses to believe you, you may want to ask yourself if he is hoping you are gay and simply denying what you say for that reason.

Julia

[trannie T]

Crossdressing is pretty much a hetero thing. Drag is a gay thing. I hate labels like this but the truth is that most men who wear women's clothing are hetero.

[Katrina]

Wow, it just goes to show you that _ANYBODY_ can be misinformed!

[az_azeel]

hi
i agree with tannie T... it takes a man to wear a dress.... cross dressing is not a gay thing... in fact recent survey's say that its 70% of men at some time in their life crossdress.......

[gennee]

Most men who crossdress are heterosexual with wives and children. Some Cd's are gay, bi, trans, and genderqueer too. Gender and sexuality are two different topics. There's plenty of info on the internet to back this up. Your friend may need to be educated about this.

Gennee

[SherriePall]

Who said being a CD was easy? Even the others who fall under the GLBT banner don't understand what CD's are about. I,too, like Rachael, have read that the percentage of gays within the CD community is about the same percentage as gays within the male community. Shows we have a lot of teaching to do yet.

[jenny_cheerleader]

Thanks for all your help, I talked to him and encouraged hin to check out this site if he wishes too.

[Kate Simmons]

hi
i agree with tannie T... it takes a man to wear a dress.... cross dressing is not a gay thing... in fact recent survey's say that its 70% of men at some time in their life crossdress.......
True enough Angel but women crossdress ever so much more than men do, it's just not looked at so much when they do. Ericka

[Alicia_lynn419]

just goes to show you we are as misunderstood in the gay/lesbian community as we are in the wider population in general... It is still far more acceptable to be gay in this day and age than to be a CD....

[sierracd6]

Tell him how ya feel....just be honest...and prove him wrong if you are not gay. I am not gay, but am bicurious when I dress. If he is a friend, he will listen

[Dixie Darling]

Jenny,

Sorry, but your gay friend is misinfomed. Think about this - If you consider the fact that male homosexuals are sexually attracted to the SAME sex (as a sexual partner), it just doesn’t make sense or doesn’t add up that a crossdresser is attempting to attract a male partner by dressing as a woman. Since male homosexuals are only interested in MALE partners, why would they be attracted to a woman (or what the percieved to BE a woman) in the first place?

While it's true that there ARE gay crossdressers, as others have mentioned already, these are almost always drag queens and there's a world of difference between a drag queen and a heterosexual crossdresser.

Dixie -- http://www.geocities.com/senorita_cd

[Tina Dixon]

Sounds like just another person that knows it all.

[KELLYANN]

I THINK MOST OF US CD'S ARE HETRO. JUST LOVE TO BE FEMME. :hugs:

[Teresa Amina]

Just shows how most people of all orientations and lifestyles need to have convenient catagories to place people in. Cd/Tg doesn't fit their view of the universe. We're everywhere and nowhere at the same time.

[chantal67]

I'm female married to a CD, he's bi-sexual. And I get off watching him w/another man.

[Eugenie]

just goes to show you we are as misunderstood in the gay/lesbian community as we are in the wider population in general... It is still far more acceptable to be gay in this day and age than to be a CD....
Indeed, I've observed that greater discrimination on X-dressers than on gays and lesbians. And I think that X-dressers are even more subject of discriminations than transsexuals, but this may be only an impression.

Some Gays don't accept us very well. They think we give a image of "grande folles" like in "la cage aux folles" which is not the image they want to give of themselves.
However, in the Lesbian and Gay advocacy organisations, our problems of discrimination are starting to be better known. I hope some of you will have already seen the great commercial ILGA (International Lesbian and Gays Association) has paid for and which is bein aired these days to commemorate the WHO decision to take homosexuality from the list of mental illnesses.

Yours sincerely.

Eugenie

[Jillian310]

One example of the gay/CD 'line of demarcatation' is my experience at the Blue Moon in Pgh Pa. There is a main room with the bar there which seems to be the turf of gay men. A smaller back room seems to be the turf of the CDs. The two groups do come into contact mostly when you go to the bar to get a drink, and there is no surface tension. In fact, the Blue Moon is considered CD friendly, and I have found that to be so. But I have not seen any real interaction between the groups. BTW, while not an issue in this thread, while the girls there tend toward short skirts etc (Including me), I have seen one guy in the larger room on a Saturday night in low rider hot pants and a thong that was totally exposed above the waistline! Tell the truth, he was very cute and had a great bod!

[Toni Panties]

Hi, I am a newbie here so other than my introduction this is my first post. I am a bi sexual crossdresser. My experience with gay men has been mixed. One or two liked me in panties but not full dress. Several others were totally turned off by anything feminine and would not touch me unless I was in drab including tighty whitey's. In talking to the few that were ok with limited female dressing, they said that most gay's enjoy drag shows but those that like drag queens were a minority. Most gays want nothing to do with anything female. Not all but most. Most CD's that I have met with are straight and from reading on the subject I think this is true. I would guess that if he hangs out in exclusive gay circles then the only crossdressers that he has met are gay. Any way just my two cents. Bi the way Chantal57, you would be my dream girl.

Toni

[Bridget]

Well, especially in the Bay Area, where being GLTB isn't as big of a deal as elsewhere, people tend to become more centered on the group they are in. Gays tend to focus on gays, lesbians on lesbians, so there's plenty room for ignorance on TG and crossdressers. There's a big gap between the GLB and T, party because the T isn't well or fully understood, and this can be magnified by the lack of a need for soldiarity among the LGBT community.

My gay friend, on the other hand, completely knew that CDing isn't necessarily gay. It varies, I suppose.