Who Knows About "Her"?

[windycissy]

Is the feminine side of your life a deep dark secret? Have you confided in someone you trust? Mingled with others en femme? Or come all the way out of the closet?

[Sharon]

I confided with my late wife, but no one since. I think I might be getting close to telling my sister though, just to have someone to talk with "face to face." Otherwise, the closet door remains closed for the time being.

[genevieve_ohara]

Nada. Haven't told a single soul.

It's so secret, I haven't even told some of the girls on this forum!

(whatever that means)

Love

G

[Rachel Elizabeth]

;)

I really, really came out about three years ago. Since I travel so much, Rachel always went on business trips with me. I would dress and go a car rides.

About 3 years ago, I decided I had to talk to someone. I called my sister around Halloween and indicated that I was going to a party and that we were on a scavenger hunt. [Sound familiar?] I stopped by; she laughed. We chatted for about an hour and I dropped the "panties." I told her that I had always wanted to be a girl. In later conversations, she told me it took her about 6 months to digest it but that she likes me better as her sister than her brother. We have sleepovers; dress up in our mothers jewelry, etc. She lets me keep my wardrobe at her house. When I see her, in almost always as Rachel.

About that same time, I stayed at the same hotel when I visit Chicago [the burbs.] I
became friends with the female night manager. I introduced Rachel to her. Since then,
I can register and check in as Rachel; I can eat the dining room; I can sit in the bar - knowing that I won't be bothered because she has passed the word on. It is really nice to be able to do that.

I did the same thing in the St. Louis burbs. Same effect.

I have become a regular at a beauty salon. They treat me just like one of the girls and I am registered in their system as Rachel.

It is so nice, that I want more!!! I want, I want! I need, I need!

Hugs.....

[Sandra H]

The only person I ever told was my late wife. She understood and helped me to buy my cloths. I now wear her cloths, most fit me and those that are a little small, I will get in after my weight loss. :) But now she is gone, nobody knows other than my friends here.

[babe4life]

Well, I have come out (spoken to) to two beautiful women. They are giving me the emotional support that I really needed and yet neither has actually seen Vicky in all her refinery :). Seen photos, but not in the flesh :p

If you can find someone you can trust, it is just so nice. I am closer now to both of them than ever before. I suppose it stands to reason - they know something about me that no one else knows (lol) and they have shared things with me too. So there is this tit for tat thing happening.

Love,
Vicky

[maidtina]

For twenty years my wife was the only one to know, and to date she's the only one to have seen me dressed.

One or two others, mainly other TV/TGs that I know have been told the basic fact.

But that's all about to change. We told a couple we know and trust a few months ago and just this weekend she checked over my dresses whilst visiting. She's told me in no uncertain terms that none of them are suitable and that we'll have to find something more appropriate for the New Years masked ball that they are taking us to.

So I have a deadline for my first public outing. I'm little apprehensive but excited. I just hope my makeup skills (I've only recently started trying makeup, but now intend to practice every night) won't let me down.

[Teddie]

My wife knows all, and sees all :D

[Cristen]

My wife knows but has only seen me in panties, hose, and sandals whice I wear daily, but I have an elderly friend, who lost his wife, who knows and he likes to have me over to visit, dressed. I would love to have someone I could share and talk with.

[Amelie]

I voted Danced out of the closet, even though I was never in the closet.
Everyone I know,,,knows I dress.
Amelie

[Rachel B.]

My wife knows. A couple of local girls I meet through the local support web site know but have not seen me "dressed" as Rachel

[StephanieCD]

5 people.

Two exes. Two shrinks. One TS friend.

Oh wait - 7, one new neuro psycologist and once I told a friend when we were wasted. He is very open minded but I think, even in our state of mind, he respected the secret and has never mentioned it again.

[Jeanette H]

At the moment, only two people who know my everyday self also know that I dress. One is a male friend - I know that he's a spanking enthusiast and collects magazines, videos etc on the subject, so there seemed no reason not to tell him what I like to do. The other is a clinical psychologist I've been seeing for a few weeks. At our last appointment I showed him some pictures of me as Jeanette.

[JennyCD]

I have no-one outside of this site that I am close enough to, or trust enough to "come out" with. Sometimes I really wish I did.

[Julie]

I have two friends, one male, one female who know about Julie and who when I visit them am able to be Julie. My female friend is great and I often come away from there with more clothes and make-up, I treasure my male friend for being so understanding and non-judgemental. When they visit me off course I'm Julie.

I also have no qualms about telling anybody if the issue arises.

JJ

[ChristineRenee]

2 therapists, my mother and my wife. My wife is the only one who has ever seen me dressed. My mother was the last one to know. She never really knew for all those years. (she is 88 years old now and in an assisted living center)


Love,
Christine Renee

[Kaye_martin]

I voted. Only my wife, a close female frend of the family and doctor know. Thinking about telling another close female friend. That's about it.

kaye-martin

[DonnaT]

My wife has known for 28~29 years. A secretary caught me dressed and was cool with it. My mom probably knows, caught once and she found my stash during my teen years. Wanted to bring it up with her recently, but my wife wouldn't let me. Planning on going enfemme to a TGEA Holiday Formal in Dec. in Northern Virginia. Will be a first.

DonnaT

[JoannaDees]

My two daughters know and my therapist. That's about it, unless I've been careless and the neighbors have seen me ... careless or just trying to get caught.

And who knows, maybe all of DC by now ..... GEN!

[Rachelle A]

Everybody!!!!!!!!

[crispy]

I voted nobody except my friends in this forum, but my wife found out. I did not confide in her. She does not approve. I'll bet there are many in that situation.

[Elinor]

Only people on the net know about Elinor and its mostlikely to stay that way.


Do your own thing girlfriend ! :)

[Sweet Susan]

I had a hard time with the vote choices; none of them really fit me, but two were close. I have told my ex-wife, whom I dressed in front of, and my current wife, whom I dress around whenever I have the "balls" to do it, which is more often all of the time. My ex wife, I am sure, told everybody, my current wife has told no one.

[joann]

My SO knows,so do the girls in my beauty salon and hotel in Amsterdam.Thats it.
joann

[Lucy Coleman]

I have only ever told one person - and they no longer talk to me. Luckily I've made lots of friends on-line.

[AnnaMaria]

No one really knows about anna except you girls. I think that my wife has an idea due to the fact that she knows that I wear lingerie and nightgowns. But no one has ever seen me dressed. I have been trying to figure out exactly how to tell my wife about anna but every time I think I have come up with a way she makes a comment about something that puts anothe3r idea in the scrap pile.
She is a very religious woman and she keeps reminding me about it with little comments about the bible or church or other stuff like that. So I am still trying to find just the right way and time to tell her.

anna

[Wendy me]

the girls at jc pennys, the ups man, my next door nabor ,my thearepest,and of corse "he" knows i think my youngest son 22 knows my wife dosent know??????? working on that one

[Wendy me]

the girls at jc pennys, the ups man, my next door nabor ,my thearepest,and of corse "he" knows i think my youngest son 22 knows my wife dosent know??????? working on that one


i am pretty shure anyone with a coumpter that wants to know knows

[BobbieG]

You can't hide it very well when you are going through transformation, it's pretty hard to conceal 38 Cs even in a sweat shirt. My whole family knows and also close friends.
I have the utmost support from all of them.
My parents God rest there soul are gone and I have only one sister and she was always for this as I have always been small I only stand 5'2" in my western boots and weigh 128 at the moment. I finally found the person of my dreams in my life and that is my So what a great person.
Love to all
Bobbie :)

[Nikki A.]

Wife knows refuses to talk about it but lets me shop and get first shot at some of the stuff she buys and then decides to return. Not really happy with it.
Told a lesbian friend, she told me about some others in town who are in the lifestyle but since then she has been very stand offish when I run into her.
therapist, after spending too much money with him, his advise was if it feels good do it.
AND FINALLY, THIS FORUM you are the best most supportive group. I've divulged more to you all than even my wife. I stay up much too late to talk and read and post but I can't help myself. So much to say so little time

[Sharon]

Your wife doesn't sound all that opposed to your dressing if she shops for you. Maybe you should buy her something -- something just for her!

[Renecd]

My wife knew but I didn't tell her for a very long time. I did tell me ex SO before we started a relationship because I didn't want to start off a new relationship with any type of lies. I have also told 2 GG friends and 3 on line GG's. Then everyone here also. Wow, didn't realise I even told that many LOL

Hugs,
Rene

[windycissy]

Here is my analysis of the poll I started:

Based on our sampling, about one third of all crossdressers do it in total secrecy. That means that this forum (and others like it) is the only outlet they have for sharing their experiences. This is a fantastic thing - before this site came along, how many of us never had the opportunity to bare our souls to anyone?

Another significant fact: groups like Tri-Ess are only scratching the surface of potential members, with barely 5% of the respondents. This is a huge positive for such sororities: they have an enormous untapped market to appeal to.

I wonder if the overall results suggest that there are more crossdressers in the generall population than previously indicated? Ask Windy (http://snurl.com/askwindy)

[jennifer michelle]

The list of those who know of my cd'ing has been deliberately kept small. My wife, of course, knows everything. My parents & siblings "suspected" when I was growing up, but only my sister knows for sure. I've opened up fully to 2 counsellors (ladies), to a Tri-Ess group I once belonged to and to other cd's. Over the years, I've developed trusting relationships with certain lady employees (ages from 20 to 60) at women's clothing stores & shops as well as cosmetics boutiques that I frequent. I place great value on their friendliness & guidance. However, not once have I opened up to a "regular " male friend or relative nor to female co-workers and friends because I see no advantage or good reason in doing so.

[wilma]

I recently became single and with my new situation I may be more apt to tell a new close friend. Thank god for this forum, at present my only support and outlet.

[kimmjacoby]

Until I Came Out Two Decades Ago, Only My Wife, Best Friend(male) And Women That I Was In A Relationship With Knew. All Of Which Only Tolerated It. Eventually, The Emotional Pain Of Keeping This Secret From Others Became So Great That I Became Depressed And Suicidal. I Then Found An Understanding Therapist And Joined The First In Person Tg Support Group, Then The Second, Then The Third, Etc... Going To The Support Groups Allowed Me To Become Comfortable Out In Public Le Femme. This Is When All The Walls Came Down And Started To Go Anywhere I Chose, Le Femme.
I Told All Of My Friends, Neighbors And Anyone I Met Usually Within The First Hour Of Conversation. Even When Out In Drab, I Show Everyone My Le Femme Photo Id. (driv. Lic.) In The Streight Clubs I Hang In, My Nickname, Given To Me By My Gg Friends Is "leggs". After Coming Out, I Did Lose One 20 Year Friendship. But I've Made Many More Friends Who Are Much Closer To Me.
Since I Am An Out Of The Closet P/t Streight Crossdresser, (when Out In Drag, A Lesbian) I Have Been Shocked Over How Many Guys Have Confided In Me About Their Private Crossdressing Habits And Women Who Are Turned On By It.

Hugs,
Kimm

[Charlotte Elizabeth]

Nobody I currently count among my friends knows. A couple of people were told, but-thanks to my drinking and general stupidity-I dont see them anymore.

[Katiegirl]

My ex wife knows as she divorced me because of it and no doubt told her friends in great detail about it. However that was 20 years ago and I haven't told anyone since that time. I have never discussed it with my kids as they live a distance away, my ex may have told them if she has its never been mentioned by them

I would like to tell some of my women friends but I'm not sure their reaction and they are good friends so I don't want to loose their friendship.

I have therefore voted no one (except for you girls)

Glad I found this forum its great!!!!!

[Rhonda Callahan]

My ex-wife, because she "let" me dress with her a couple of times and was jealous, so after the divorce, she probably told all our friends, because I don't have them anymore,probably all her family, my 2 sisters know, so probably their kids too, one close female friend who has seen the videos, and all you ladies ! I don't really care that much anymore, because I've absorbed the psychological impacts in my mind, so it couldn't make any difference anymore, and besides, no one would dare say anything to my face, I have a large handicap, my irish !

[rachel_jean]

Only my wife knows and that works for me, for now.

Rachel Jean

[Donna Louise]

I came out to my wife about 6 years ago. It was getting to hard to hide. Oh, she knew I was wearing panties, panty hose, and ladies jeans.

I was out of town one time, she went into my closet and got a sports coat to wear. She found a bra in the inner pocket. That was a little hard to explain. She thought it was a keepsake from an affair. :eek:

After I told her it was very hard to get dressed completely and come down the stairs for her to see me. Of course she had comments. That wig looks terrible, that dress is all wrong, your boobs are too small for your frame. :confused:

I did join the local chapter of Tri Ess for a year. I had a wonderful time. Money got tight and I had to drop out. Now she thinks it is a waist of time. Of course she never went to a meeting with me or never even talked to some of the other wives.

Have a great day
Donna Louise :p

[Paula A]

I have not really come right out and told anyone yet - Im a coward. Im scared to death to loose my wife whom I adore and admire. However she has her suspisions. I had on clear nail polich and have been wearing clear nail polich on and off since about the end of october. Wednesday night dhe started the conversation about my nail polish and I chickened out! I Can't believe it! what a coward. then the usual questions.
Do you want to be a girl? are you a TS or a TG? Are you a CD? Are you Gay? I told her honestly, Im not gay. she said are you confused? I said I don't know, I just like it (the nail polish) - they look nice and I like it. I should have told her. But I don't want to loose her.

My wife and her male husband (the other me) have recently in the past year or so have been questioning to ourselves the gender of our son. One day my son came into the kitchen and said something - Oh yeah I remember, he had a couple of small balloons up under his shirt, He uses them to practice his soccer juggeling in the house, any-hoo he comes into the kitchen and start prancing around with his new boobs, my wife asked him do you want to be a girl? son says "no" My wife asked him about the way he carries on about the house because it's OK if you want to be a girl. my son says " I just like it that's all" I also think he was embaressed as well and might of hid his true feelings.

she wasn't upset or mad or anything just matter of factly and motherly with my son. I don't know why I chickend out, I just did.

so to answer the poll - I keep it a secret but my wife knows something up and I should tell her.

[Katiegirl]

Thanks Jenny for your thoughts regarding how my friends would react , you may well be right. After the drama with my ex I am very cautious about caming out. but it would be great if Katie could be friends with them also.

Hope you will soon be over you your troubles

[DonnaT]

Yes Paula, I do believe the time is ripe. Especially if your son has the gift also, as you have a lot of valuable information to pass on to both your wife and your son about being transgendered.

I suspect she knows, as you do, but is waiting for you to bring it up when you're more comfortable. Otherwise, she would have objected to the polish, and she would have told your son that boys don't have boobs.

Sounds like you have a winner there. Good luck!

[Paula A]

Donna;
Thanks for the encouragement and your vote of confidence. we are planning on going shopping just the two of us. lets see what happens. I have never thought of it as a gift, more like a burden / cross to bear however that attitude is changing. I'll let you know on monday.