Experience with tri-ess or support for CDs?

[StephanieCD]

I noticed in a recent poll that not many said they were in a support group...

I'm curious about Tri-Ess and other CD groups. I've done that format of meeting before but I'm afraid sitting in a room of CDs might make me feel a bit uncomfortable... or something.

A local activist I wrote to invited me out with them, the local tri-ess chapter, but I chickened and stopped writing... I can't imagine they're discrete about things.

What is your experience with support groups? I imagine it'd be reassuring to find other CDs in the area but... I don't know - any input?

What I'd love to do is meet some other CDs in drab at a bar or something and hang out, you know, see that we're all just people - and THEN talk about stuff... maybe I should start a secret club! Contact the local chapters and invite them out, in drab, to welcome the timid... or something. *sigh*

[Sharon]

Stephanie:
Tri-ees, or another organization, might be just the thing for you, but only you can know that. It might be worth a shot just to see what it's all about and whether it's what you're looking for.
Me? The written support I get in these forums are all I need for now.
Sharon

[clarissa3d]

I have been to one Sigma Epsilon meeting and it was great. I have not been back only because of current work and home issues.

It is a great group and is definatly worth the time. I walked in in Drab but brought my femme things in a bag. I changed in the bathroom and felt as if I where with freinds I have known for years.
I will startup again when situations permit.

Try it out in drab if anything. You will find warm open arms!

:)

[StephanieCD]

Sigma Epsilon is a Tri-Ess chapter, I take it?

What's the meeting like?

[Jen_TGCD]

Stephanie~
I joined our local TG Support Group... and it was the best, most incredible experience of my life. This was about five or six years ago when very few sites like this one even existed. I was totally isolated and only had a few online friends that I could talk to. I went to the first meeting in drab and found that most were also in drab as they didn't have time to go home and change after work. They also had an online forum, similar to this one, that kept us all in touch with each other and more indepth discussions and socializing could be done between the meetings.

I don't go to many meetings anymore (it's an hours drive for me) but I keep in touch through their list-serve.

It ended up being the perfect place to meet all the local TGs and since they were members, you already knew something about them. It was safe and comfortable.

Our group is an "open" group so total anonymity is not guaranteed but there is an unspoken rule that everyone's right to privacy was honored.

So... yes, I'm an advocate for TG Support Groups. Yup!!! http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/images/icons/icon14.gif

[StephanieCD]

I wonder... what would I ever do if I met someone I already knew at one?

When I was a kid my friends would get pissed about shopping at K-mart, saying "what if someone saw me?" and I'd remind them "they're there too, dipshit" but - it would be wild to see a face I knew at a meeting... I see a lot of local faces in my day job - and if anyone knew it might ruin my career.

I wonder if any of the people I know dress?

[clarissa3d]

SE is a part of Tri ess. A chapter if you wish.

http://www.sigmaepsilonatlanta.org/

They have a schedule of the meeting over the weekend. From Friday to Sunday.

I really enjoyed meeting other girls. The different walks of life is so neat.

Take the time even if it is just to contact them to let them know you are there.

[Chrissycd]

is a group I found out about by reading the biography of a cd who is a leading figure in the organization, but I can't remember the name of the book or the author (sigh...) Anyway, I contacted my local chapter about a year ago and IM'd w/ the girl who was their new member contact. Finally, after alot of waffling on my part, I finally met with her at a local Caribou Coffee.
We spent an hour, maybe more, just talking (in drab). It was sort of like a very low key interview. She was very thoughtful and we talked about whether they would be right for me (b/c they attempt to maintain that they are heterosexual only). She showed me pix of her at chapter events etc., and we had a nice conversation. I don't plan to join b/c I consider myself bi, even though I haven't, you know, been w/ a boy before...hehehe :p
But, it sounds like they are confidential, as much as possible. They meet monthly, but some come regularly, while other don't. There is a fee to join but, it isn't extreme. They have mtngs. for cds and friends, family, and then they have them just for members, and then they have special events, speakers, parties and things like that.
I'd join if I fit their "guidelines", but I don't.
I'd encourage you to go if you can. Good luck!
Chrissy

[StephanieCD]

I'm nervous that people would know... maybe I'll contact that local person again and see if he'll go out in drab with me. That'd be cool.

[Chrissycd]

she didn't offer to do that to begin with, honey. My local won't let you come to a meeting until you've been "interviewed". It's something they do to make sure you are sincere and not trouble in the making.

[DonnaT]

Stephanie, have you visted their web site at http://www.tri-ess.org/?

Check out the bylaws and policies. Note that if you run into someone you know, they are in the same boat with you.

I'm thinking of joining a local chapter or another group (TGEA), not for me, but for my wife to associate with other SOs. She's still up in the air about it though.

[StephanieCD]

Been there. Participated in forums. My SO at the time did. You can tell yours I said mine found it very helpful - especially because it's off limits to the cds. She said there's a lot of catty "girl talk" there that really helped her accept her feelings.

I've yet to attend a meeting, though. I guess it'd be a form of acceptance and that's scary. Kew, you tell me ;)

[KewTnCurvy GG]

You're nervous, Stephanie, the way I was nervous when I sought counseling through the GLBT services office. I thought everyone knew that I was confused about my sexuality at the time (which I was a bit) and that they knew I was going there and why. I also thought that if I spoke with her or saw her in the hallway, everyone would know--I was gay, bi whatever. Moral of this story. My fears/paranoia were a result of my own inner turmoil and fear of what would ppl think. (I need to say that the counselor was a grad student in my social work program, so we crossed paths occassionally). You more than likely, far less transparent than you think. And I agree, most members and chapters will naturally honor your privacy.

hugs
kew

[Sharon]

I'm nervous that people would know... maybe I'll contact that local person again and see if he'll go out in drab with me. That'd be cool.

This sounds like a good idea Stephanie. Start off slow and get used to the idea, then try going out fem if you want. Later on, as you grow more comfortable, maybe attend some meetings of an organization or find out which clubs or bars in your area are open to CD's. If you do the latter, go with a friend!