Ever think...

[Katie Ashe]

Have you ever thought about why you feel like a lady, and need to dress up?

I have learned much about myself, these past few weeks... That I am a woman trapped in a mans body. I accept I will never be a lady, in this life time. I also have learned that Katie is used as my safe heaven, because I dislike my past, and hate whom I am. I pushed for Katie to take over my life, simply because I wanted a fresh start. Katie has no past, no bad memories, no ill family, no problems that Bryan has. It is an over welming feeling to be Katie. But I have realized that, What I wear does not change whom I am, nor how the world has seen me. It's rare that we will get to start over, with out going to the extreme. I'm learning to live with whom I am and what I will become. I will continue to dress up, as it is my expression of how I see myself, not what I am tring to become. I am 100% out of the closet and have no regrets, except not loving myself sooner.

What is your driving force to dressing up? Be honest, it may be hard to even answer at first...

[TGMarla]

I started when I was 12, when my adolescent sexual urges were exploding and my hormones were raging. I found it to be quite a sexual thrill. This was my early driving force behind crossdressing. But as I grew up and older, those reasons changed from strictly a sexual thrill to more of a lament and a regret that I was not female, and was not allowed to wear these lovely clothes. I at times thought I was the "woman trapped in a man's body", but I never quite got to the point that I really believed it deep down. Now, I feel that while there are certainly aspects of my personality that are decidedly female, there is also much about me that is decidedly male as well. And while men aren't allowed to wear dresses and such, it being against the rules, you see, this obviously does not prevent me from doing so. I'm not enough female to actually warrant SRS, and I have concluded that I will make do as a crossdressing male.

So I guess it is the "woman in me" that drives my crossdressing....that and the fact that I just plain enjoy it.

[Tracy_Victoria]

I cross dress, purely for the fun of it, there is no underlying desires or needs to my dressing, I just like to look different, and appearing to cross the gender boundary, is as different as you can get really.

I'm a (happy) guy, who occationally enjoy's dressing as a girl, I have no desire to change, or make changes to my body that are perminant, in any way. Ie anything from Shaving my body hair, using wigs, body forms, contact lenses is okay, But taking homones, having my boobs enlarged, or even having my ears done, is not on my agenda.

I have no desire to be a female, as I said, I dress just for the fun of it!

[~Dee~]

i cd due to terminology. while i am unable to present as female 24/7, i think that it would still be catagorised as cd'ing ..
though personally, i dont see it like that at all.
i wear what i want nowadays ..
sometimes its a little more girly, other times its more subtle and subdued.

dressing hasnt ever been a sexual thing for me and its never been a retreat from my life .. i have a past that id gladly wipe clean and start again, but i tried my best to always face that as best as i could.
for me, its just who i am. i feel female. ive never been the macho muscled guy, ive always liked being the sort of person i am, even when i denied my TS side.

when i go to put on a shirt, i simply choose what i like to wear. it just happens to be more girly a lot of the times. its not out of conscious choice or decision .. its just what i like .. it suits my style.
((does that sound about right, kitty?))

its not a shift in reality or a peak in sexuality .. to me its not crossdressing .. its just me.
hmm .. does that mean that im on this site under false pretenses?

[wendy]

in my younger years, I dressed CD mainly for the sexual thrill (in my earlier years a CDing episode wouldn't last more than 30 min if that), but as I grew older I guess my views on CDing has also changed, as I've noticed a shift from that 'sexual thrill' to a feeling that it just feels so right, so comfortable. I remain dressed for as long as possible (until the mrs. comes home).

I don't CD anymore for the sexual thrill, for me now it is a part of stress relief from the work week, traffic, and life in general, and an outlet for me to explore the feminine side in me.:D

[Katie Ashe]

I'm surprized at the low reponse to this thread. I think as a default we all as kids started dressing as a sexual thing. As we got older, and self discovery grew, we became whom we are today. I dress alot for stress relieve also from life. Some of us dress for fun, some dress simply because it feels right. Some would do SRS to match out soul and our body. Dawn wore make-up the other day, for a funneral, and complained the night about it wount come off. Dressing is time consuming, and can be expensive. I have a pair of mules, for $12, and seen something similar with a brand name lable for $251. What a big difference. Most of us dress in secrecy, and live in the closet. Come on here ladies, even GG's ... what is the reason for your SO/you dressing up? Why do you remain the the closet if your a die hard transgendered person?

[Lilith Moon]

I don't know why I do it, just a couple of comments...


I'm surprized at the low reponse to this thread. I think as a default we all as kids started dressing as a sexual thing.


I beg to differ. According to a recent poll in here, many of us started at an age far too young for there to be any sexual component. At age 4 I was trying to wear bedsheets as dresses simply because it felt right. Of course, at puberty the sex kicked in with a vengance and swept my crossdressing to new levels.



As we got older, and self discovery grew, we became whom we are today.


Yes, I agree there. Now I am older my CD-ing has lost some of the sexual intensity and my motivation is tending toward "feeling right" again.

It seems that many of us have an underlying asexual proclivity toward cross dressing which can be focused and intensified by our sexual drives.

[RikkiOfLA]

Have you ever thought about why you feel like a lady, and need to dress up?

I was a post-war baby (born in 1949). My mother had miscarried before, once for sure, maybe a second time (I'm not sure). So I was born when she was 40 years old--likely to be her last chance at having a baby. Her doctor prescribed "something new" that was supposed to help prevent miscarriages. It worked, of course--I was born a healthy baby.

I've done some research and learned that what she was given was diethylstilbestrol (DES), a synthetic female hormone. It had lots of side effects on the baby which were not discovered until much later. Male babies were sometimes born transgendered. Even more common is that sexual climax is very painful (I have that too). The side effects are even more severe on some female babies--misformed genital tissue and breasts.

But today I don't blame DES for my transgenderedness. I rather enjoy being this way, and without it, I might have ended up a miscarriage! I'm glad to be alive.

Before I understood the cause, I used to feel ashamed, guilty, and fearful of discovery, just like so many have written. So understanding why I am this way has been very helpful; it's helped me to understand there is a reason for this; it's biochemical in origin.

Another thing that has helped a lot has been to find positive things I can do with my transgenderedness. I am a Christian and an ordained minister. I pastor the New American Christian Church, which has a special outreach to transgenders, to other GLBT folks, to people dealing with cancer and their families, to children of addicts and alcoholics, and to people with emotional and physical handicaps. We share the message that God loves all of us. God doesn't make junk; we are all made in the image of God and are inherently worthwhile. Lots of people are feeling better about themselves because of our work.

I live full time as an openly transgendered woman and have for the past eight and a half years. I am happily married; my wife fully accepts this about me. I try to dress passably and respectfully every day. I go everywhere dressed as a woman (the supermarket, for walks around the neighborhood, to get my hair and nails done, out to dinner with my spouse, etc.) and I'm the president of our condo association.

And even though I'm full time, I don't take hormones. I tried herbal hormones briefly; they made the DES effects even worse. So it's become a mark of pride for me to be hormone free, to say that my femininity comes from within, not from a bottle.

Do I get aroused seeing myself in the mirror? Like most others, I used to, but with time this has diminished. Today, it's something that I can do, and I love to share those experiences with my wife, who sees it as a gift that I bring to the marriage bed and share with her. She's wonderful, and I tell her that about 40 zillion times a day! :love:

I wake up in the morning and ask myself if this wonderful, feminine lifestyle could really be happening. And then I put on a pretty skirt, or maybe some nice, tight women's pants, and a feminine top, for the day, and I know. It's true!

I love being me! :mrgreen:

[Gurly]

Why we crossdress is the $64,000 question, isn't it? I started very young (age 4) and gave up wondering as to why I did it years ago. I am what I am and can't change that. Personally for me CDing is a sexual thing but less so as I get older. For some reason it just feels "right". However, I've never wanted to change sex permanently and certainly do not think I am trapped in the wrong body. At the risk of opening a can of worms, although it seems that most people who have the surgery to change their sex started out crossdressing I think that it is different from those who dress because they like the "illusion" of looking like a women. I don't think we'll ever really know the reasons why we crossdress.

As for why some of us stay in the closet....well, I believe that society (for the most part) doesn't accept a man in a dress. Yes, times are a little more accepting but overall people either (a) make fun of us or (b) question our sexuality. So, you either hide in the closet (like me) or embrace your other self and tell the whole world to buzz off. I envy those girls that do come out and get to live life as they want.

[Shelly Preston]

I think everyone has a male and a female side to them.
It's not quite as simple as that but you get the idea.

I know I dont want surgery or hormones I am happy being a crossdresser
There have been times in the past where i did seriously consider the possibility, that I may want surgery.
The answer is really that the reason for dressing is to express my female side.

[Sandygal]

When I was around 6 to 8, I would sneek into my mom's room and put on her petticoat and dance around. Sometimes I would check out her pantie drawer . I knew nothing about sex then, But I knew I loved wearing and feeling womans clothes. As I came into my teens, I would love to check out my aunts underclothes. It was so taboo. In my 20's and 30's, it all died down for awhile. When we played board games or video games, I usually picked the girls piece or picked the girl role in video games. Don't get me wrong, I would still get a sexual rush in my younger years. But the rush was bigger when I imagined myself dressed up with a girl. Now I am in my late 40's and there are times its sexual, but mostly I go through a very calming time when I get dressed. It wasn't until last year that all the pieces started coming together. I'm happy with who I am now. If my s.o. would accept me, life would be great. My only wish is that I was 5'8" instead of 6'3". No matter how dressed down I would get, I would stick out in a crowd. Passing would be wonderfull. Oh well, time to work.
Sandy

[Katie Ashe]

... I don't think we'll ever really know the reasons why we crossdress...
Here is the thing. There is no right or wrong answer. I was challenged on why I dress and took some time to find out why. Thank you all for sharing, keep them coming. I started dressing when I was between 3-4 years old too. Everyone dresses for similar reasons at one point or another. This thread is an example of: we are all human, and all have feelings, and each of us is unique. So the more we learn about ourselfs, the more we can help others, like Cheery GG. She is a very nice honest person, whom gave us (Transgender) a chance. Over time we will be able to live in the open. The fact is no one is 100% male or female. So love ourselfs and celebrate life. :Party2:

[EricaCD]

My inclination lies pretty close to Tracy Victoria's.

As far as "why" I am compelled to do it? Simple answer: I don't know, and I am ok with not knowing.

Erica

[sierracd6]

I agree with ShellyP. We are all both sides of the coin. I do not understand it myself, but evryone, male and female, has the duel feelings. It is just that some of us can be realastic about it and express our true colors