Overwhelmed... (Kind of long)

[heather_nouveau]

Hi everbody!

Okay, here goes!

I had my first session with my therapist this past week; we talked about an amazing array of topics including hormones, SRS, changing my name, etc.

We also discussed how to tell my SO (mine doesn't know yet) and transitioning and the workplace. (I have a job offer with a company on the west coast which would probably be the best shot on being supportive of my transition (as opposed to my current workplace).

Taking the job would be a great step career-wise, but also entails relocating (selling my home) and uprooting myself from a place I lived nearly all my life. I'd also have to find a new GP and therapist as well.

Lots of scary, normal life stuff.

Oh yeah, then there's the whole "transition thing" on top of all this.

I left feeling somewhat overwhelmed! (Major understatement). :eek:

One of things that my therapist suggested was that I at least try to tell my SO that I'm in therapy as a "first step" towards telling her the rest of the story.

Well, I did tell my SO that I'm beginning to see a therapist (not mentioning the transitioning). She took it amazingly well! She was upset that I didn't come to her first, but was relieved that I was seeking professional help to figure things out.

I'm glad that this small step forward went well; I hope it bodes equally well for the next major revelation. (Probably not, I know).

I have a second appointment scheduled this week. Lots more to talk about!

Thank you all for listening, I hope I haven't scared anybody!

Hugs, :hugs:

Heather

[CaptLex]

I have a second appointment scheduled this week. Lots more to talk about!

Thank you all for listening, I hope I haven't scared anybody!
Wow, Heather, it sounds like you've got a lot going on all at the same time. Congratulations on getting started with it all and I hope things work out for you. Please keep us posted. :thumbup:

[~Dee~]

I think most of us at one point in time or another has felt overwhelmed ..
and from the sounds of it .. you have more than enough to feel overwhelmed about.

i dont think the feeling overwhelmed is bad .. but what you do with it makes all the difference .. dont let it get you down or eat at you ..
when i get into a situation like this .. i try to take things as one step at a time .. break it down into priorities and approach it as only having to look at the next step .. that way you dont get stuck looking too far into the future at ALL the stuff you are meant to deal with.

i dont know .. but it helps me.

but also remember that you have a perfect place here to vent and complain and whine if you even feel the need .. we are here to support each other afterall ..
just take it easy and im sure you will do great.
it sounds like youve already made a fantastic start of things .. :happy:
keep going at this rate and ill unload all my problems on you and you can go fix them up for me ;)

[heather_nouveau]

Thanks Dee & Lex for your support and advice!

I think you all know how scary and (at times) overwhelming finally acknowledging your real self can be!

I will keep you all post as things develop.

Thanks again!

Hugs,

Heather

[GypsyKaren]

Wow, you really do have a full plate! I'm glad things went well with your therapist, I know what a battle it is to find one you're comfortable with. I do agree with Dee about taking one step at a time, I don't think I'd try to accomplish so much at once. In any event, we're always here for you.

Karen

[Sarahgurl371]

Heather I hope things calm down a bit for you soon! It is very overwhelming.

You mentioned that your wife does not know about this, and that you discussed it with your therapist. Then later you mentioned how you told her of seeing a therapist and she was OK with it. Did she know that you had some issues around gender previously? I guess I am just curious at how other married couples deal with this.

[Genevieve G]

Heather,

You have my support. There's nothing easy about this. I hope your wife takes it better than mine did. I'm sure there will be a lot of questions asked, hopefully, on your SO's part. My SO and I have covered this ground numerous times and I don't think there will ever be a day when she can accept it. You've taken the important first step & you should feel proud of yourself!

Genny

[heather_nouveau]

Hi Tammy:

Although I have told my wife about seeing a therapist; I have not told her exactly why; I have told her it's nothing she's done, but am trying to work through my issues (including mild depression) by seeking professional help.

I've not discussed my gender issues with her yet; am trying to build up the courage to have "the talk" later this summer. I've taken a small step, admitting to seeing the therapist (and taking meds for mild depression); it's definitely no the whole truth, but it's a start.

I'm very apprehensive about having "the talk" with her (for obvious reasons); I know I have to do it soon.

I don't know if any of this helps, but that's the story so far...(to be continued...)

Heather

[heather_nouveau]

Thanks so much Genny!

I appreciate the support! This is the hardest thing I've ever had to do!

I'm really glad I found this site and all you wonderful folks!

Knowing that others are going through this really helps!

Heather

[Sarahgurl371]

Heather, this site has been a tremendous avenue of support for myself. Just the knowing that I am not alone is amazing.

The wife thing is difficult, but don't be discouraged. Yes there are many wives who cannot or will not accept this, mine included. But there are some who do. We here at this site are lucky enough to be graced by them. I have learned alot from reading their thoughts and concerns and although the end result thus far has not been what I had hoped, their input is very valuable. You might wish to spend some time reading them as well. Can't hurt, thats for sure.

I wish you the best.

[heather_nouveau]

Tammy:

My biggest fear is that my wife won't be accepting of this; my heart goes out to you. Thanks again for your advice; I've read some of this posts on this topic. Some are inspiring, others heartbreaking. It's comforting to know that I'm not alone out here.

Thanks so much for your support & advice; I treasure them both.

Best regards,

Heather