Lessening expectations.....

[Emma_Forbes]

Hi Girls,

Something that has been in my thoughts for a few days following things that people have said to me recently. Could it be that reluctance on the part of others to see us en femme may be partly down to their assumption that we are going to dress extravangantly (I'm being polite here!) e.g., really high heels, mini skirt, boob tube and panda makeup etc. whereas actually it's more likely to be pretty normal "occasion" wear e.g., like for going out to dinner rather than an all-night rave!

Now I appreciate that sometimes dressing more sexually is what we go for (why else would I have bought a ra-ra skirt) but for most of us I guess that is the exception rather than the rule - or am I completely out of step here?

How do we change the perceptions of people to understand that looking and feeling feminine is more important to us than looking tarty (forgive the use of the word but I can't think of anything else :))?

Your thoughts would be appreciated.

Em

[SherriePall]

Emma -- We almost have to do it one-on-one with others because if we allow the mass media to do it we all end up Jerry Springered. I know that one of our forum members (forgive me, I can't remember names) has just participated in a filming for a network here in the U.S. Hopefully, it will be presented as she feels it will. But for the most part, the mass media feels the need to sensationalize us to make it sell or to draw attention or to confirm their preconceived notions about us.

[Kate Simmons]

Looking tarty is okay, I guess Em but I prefer looking like just plain Ericka. EKR

[Byllie]

The subtitle for my handle used to read "Sensible shoes" for a good reason. When I crossdress, I like to fel comfortable. Why dress to the nines in clothing that's uncomfortable. I mean, whether your GM or GG, very high heels are very high heels, and can only be worn for so long. CD is all about expressing our feminine side, not being extroverts. Sure some of use like to dress up more than others, but that's true for GGs as well. All we want is the chance to express ourselves, through clothing and such, in the same way that GGHs have been able to for quite some time. When gays and lesbians first hit the media, they were completely effeminate and butch, respectively. Today, we know better. Someday the same will be true for CDs.:cheer:

[Byllie]

That last sentence should read "... they were seen as ...".:sad:

[Ranee Daze]

Before you all give me a blast about staying away, let me say that I am doing just fine not dressing. My goal is to retire from it in the practical sense. I know it will always be there in my mind, I am just going to keep it there...in my mind.
So in my mind, and before when I was actively dressing, a hunormous part of my fun was to try all of those clothing, hair and treatment options which are available to genetic women, and us of course. It was simply delicious to finally have my hair coloured and and cut en femme in a very femme style. I was after a more glamourous look. Part of that word being "amourous" Did I look "tarty"? Not really, because I already had in in my mind that I was wanting to avoid "drag". Where fags dress up almost in characture and, frankly, insult the feminine reality. ie: Boobs too big, lashes like brooms, bands of eyeliner etc... Did I look more glamouraous than most of the ladies helping me with all of those dresses and wigs? ...absolutely, and I think some of them were very jealous.
Again, please spare me the emails scolding me for not staying away. I am doing just fine.