girlfriend problems

[chloe]

Hi, everyone. Its been a long time, but I’ve a little problem. Last time I came here it was to tell you all that I’d came out to my girlfriend ( fiancé now) , and that she was completely accepting. She even took me on numerous shopping sprees and would spend hours on my make up ect. That was fantastic. The problem is now she hates Chloe and wont let me dress at all  I kind of want to dress all the time and now, I’ve gone back to my secretive past. Anyone else had this problem?? Chloe xxxx

[kimmigir1]

is there a certain reason or incident that sparked her change of view ?

[michellecd9999]

I have not had that problem since I stayed in the closet. Since she accepted this before I think you need to talk to her to see why the change.
Michelle

[Billijo49504]

Could it be because you want to dress all the time???? Could that be the reason she wants to stop the monster she created, by giving you some encouragement???? JMHO>>>BJ

[emachine39]

I told my girlfriend and she was also accepting right away, but then she got uncomfortable with the whole thing. So I stopped talking about it for a while and then decided that we had to take it slowly. I was pressing the issue too much so now that I'm taking it easy with it everything is better.

[Joy Carter]

It's called baby steps it takes a while for some one to begin to accept you put the fear in her when you did it full time. Much to read on acceptance look it up Hun.

0.02

[Tanya K]

Hello all I just came out to my wife last night and I don't really plan to do it with her (maybe 1 day 1 thing at a time) I just want to go slow I don't want it in her face I think I would be wrong it's hard enough knowing I told my wife cause I like doing make up and if I ever leave some on I just don't want her to think I am cheating and if she ever walks in on me so It's not like What the * * * * :eek: I will let U know later how I feel It has not set in what I have done yet lol I feel things like this sould not be put in some1s face It just takes time Good luck Sweety

[Nikki Dee]

Hi. Love...I think it's quite common to experience this...and it's often OUR fault.!!...we go through that initial "pants on fire" period...want to dress 24/7..and what was initial acceptance seems to turn to resentment to some degree. Take things slowly love...be patient..communicate..and try to understand her point of view. You have had a really good start...be a shame to mess that up wouldn't it.?...All the best.!
Love Nikki. x

[tullyxxx]

Hi, everyone. Its been a long time, but I’ve a little problem. Last time I came here it was to tell you all that I’d came out to my girlfriend ( fiancé now) , and that she was completely accepting. She even took me on numerous shopping sprees and would spend hours on my make up ect. That was fantastic. The problem is now she hates Chloe and wont let me dress at all  I kind of want to dress all the time and now, I’ve gone back to my secretive past. Anyone else had this problem?? Chloe xxxx
yes love nearly all have problems in this area i mean just supposed she had told you she was now harry and wanted to be the man of the house and dress as one might be a bit up set . i think you have to take it slowly not to fast dress now and again ask her for her advice on make up and such ask her if you could try on of her bras or some of her clothes on or if she would like to dress you i found that if you talk about ladies stuff to her i breaks the ice and soon she gets used to talking to you about ladies stuff . maybe she feels threatned by chloe and thinks she is losing you all toughter try and assure her that you still lve her see maybe she might feel that if you get really nice when dressed that she might lose you my wife and i live now as sisters she works i am at home doing all the house chores that means all and it works great so good luck i am sure if you assure her of your love it will work out love grace

[lostmyhubby GG]

ever heard the expression "alot goes a long way" sometimes we just yearn for the man we fell in love with.

[caffine]

just take your time and dont push the subject. the so will come around.if not then sit down and talk .[undressed] explain your feelings.
the damage is done and its time 2 make up and fix it.

[Carroll]

I ran in to this problem also. My wife and I talked about it and set some ground rules. An example is I was allowed to dress three time a week while my kids are and school, and whenever the mood hits me after the kids go to bed. If she feels I have dressed to much in the evening she just say's "not tonight please" and that is it. Makes for a happy home :D

[DonnaT]

Hi, everyone. Its been a long time, but I’ve a little problem. Last time I came here it was to tell you all that I’d came out to my girlfriend ( fiancé now) , and that she was completely accepting. She even took me on numerous shopping sprees and would spend hours on my make up ect. That was fantastic. The problem is now she hates Chloe and wont let me dress at all  I kind of want to dress all the time and now, I’ve gone back to my secretive past. Anyone else had this problem?? Chloe xxxx
I had that problem with my wife. At first, 30 yrs ago, she was fine with it and even gave me a wig to wear. Later she wasn't. Now she's mostly ok with it, but would rather I not.

I went through that rollercoaster ride for 30 years, because she was my wife and I love her deeply. However, I've told her I'm never going back in the closet.

If she had been just a girlfriend I wouldn't have taken that ride. She could take me as I was, the whole package, or break up.

[kathy gg]

HI Chloe,

I would say you guys need to talk this out. You both need to reach a compromise. I mean let's be rael here, any marriage that starts out on secrets and half truths will have big problems later. I mean see how well hiding and secrecy works out for most on here. The proof is all around us.

I think what it sounds like it is pulled a crossdressing overdoes on her. Your gf sounded like she was possibly going beyond her own limitations and then decided to back off, because she was possibly feeling taken for granted or who knows what. Just trying to figure out since we don't have a longer post to go by.

Chloe, I looked for a crossdresser. But I did not look for a transexual. I did not look for a female. I looked for a guy who enjoyed balancing both male and female interests. You will find even the most "enthused" of gg's still enjoys a fair amount of 'guy time" with her guy. I love the dressing and truly would not have wanted a relationship with a non-cd guy. But that is just it, a part time crossdresser...not a full time make up artists assistant/personal shopper/therapist/ or all the time cd. I did not want to be someone's "accessory" or constant helper.

I think if you plan on marrying this woman you really need to have a serious sit down heart-to-heart talk.

best of luck

[Sherri Taylor]

Kathy, I agree with you all the way. My SO is very supportive and I could do what ever I wanted when ever I wanted. I may go weeks with out it, or a may do it every day for a week. When I found this site, I was so excited, and became obsessed with it. I wasn't dressing anymore than usual, but all my time and thoughts were focused on reading and exploring this site. All my conversations with my SO related to what I had found or read here. It got to be too much for her. She, (we) hit a wall with my CDing (and the subject) that I thought I would never hit with her. Everyone has their limits. So I have backed off a bit, and got back more to where we were before joining this site. And now, things are back to normal.

I hope all that made sense,

Sherri

[Andrea's Lynne]

I think Kathy GG hit the nail on the head.......compromise!

Best of luck!!!

[Rachel Morley]

You will find even the most "enthused" of gg's still enjoys a fair amount of 'guy time" with her guy.
Yep, Marla's the same. She wouldn't like it if I was en femme all the time. She likes to see me girly but she likes to see the guy part of me visable too. I actually spend a lot less time en femme than people probabaly think I do.

[Angie G]

My wife finds it hard to get close when I derss she feels shes more with a woman I backed off and she is better about it.
Your GG need her man to not just a girlfrend so chill a bit.
Angie G

[Angie G]

Good luck girl I wish you well.
Angie G

[purple_spider GG]

Hi

In some ways by imposing rules on what you can and cannot do about some thing that is a fundemental part of your nature; the way you were born; a natural part of who you are then all this is doing is forcing you to be someone she wants and not someone you really are. It makes you both unhappy because she will know that her partner is only stopping CDing to keep her happy and not because you genuninely believe she is right. Living a lie will hurt you and it will hurt her. She probably knows you are doing it in secret and the deception must hurt more. You cannot possibly contemplate a married life together full of secrecy and friction.

You need to sit down and talk to her. It sounds like she tried to accept you but something has changed all that. Why has she changed her mind? You need to ask her what she wants from this? Tell her all your plans even if it is something she is going to hate you for, and then give her the choice of staying with you for who you truely are, or walking away to find someone who meets her expectations and ambitions.

Hugs
Debs
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[Tina Dixon]

Your 30years old, if you get married thats the way it will be, so it's time to s**t or get off the pot, don't let her make all the rules.