progress made !

[michelle19845]

tonight i was asked by mom,"what do you think of these pants?" i said they look great you'll have to get me some for my birthday"she said you're going gay on me".i said "you'd still love me right?........" she said "well...i guess i'd have to". those words made me feel so much better and that there is hope.she then asked me which one of her bracelets went well with her outfit and i told her the tear drop one cause the colors stood out more with the color of her outfit better than the other which was too dark.i felt so good.there is hope especially as long as i take small steps like i am.
as for step father,he heard the comment about me asking for capris pants and gave a very dirty look.he later on was making jokes about gays at dinner.he is a homophobe as far as i am concerned,he understands that they are born the way they are and it's not a choice.he drives me crazy.atleast i'm getting progress it feels so good to know there's hope!


michelle19845

[Alison Michelle]

Hi Michelle,

Some times it's the little things that make all the difference in your day.:happy:

[Clare]

Michelle, I think you're doing the right thing with your Mom. It seems like she's starting to see you as someone who understands a women's view and perhaps as a sort of girlfriend she can confide in and discuss things like dressing options for herself - StepDad wouldn't have this type of discussion with Mom would he?

Keep at it with small steps - just be honest and sincere with her and I think you will find she will gradually understand where you're 'coming from' so to speak.

Glad to hear things are more settled between the two of you.

[Natasha Anne]

That's just so good for a person. Little moments. Be sure to put them all in a diary. One day you will value them so much. They're such an amazing reminder of who was there for you from the beginning, and how much you're thinking may have changed.

As for the homophobe. Maybe he needs to get through his denial, so give him time. Many homophobes who heard about my transition we terrible to me, but in time as they've started to realise I'm still me, have come around and are ven happy to go to the pub with me now! This takes patience, and an immediate response from a potential homophobe should not be seen as that. Otherwise you're judging them as quickly as they're judging you... remember your Mom may have suspected something for ages, he probably hasn't.

My brother is and remains a homophobe, but now he always hugs me when I see him, and has even got me involved in a joint business venture with him and his friends and colleagues and is happy to visit with me and go out with me. He just needed time. I value him even more, because he worked through his issues, which was tough for him (or anyone for that matter) just so he could maintain the wonderful friendship we have.