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View Full Version : Do we all end up defensive?



Emeralddragon
07-05-2006, 01:47 PM
I was reading through Karrens thread about whether or not to take her son with her on a business trip and not dress or not take him and dress. Well i really should say her poorly executed attempt at finding out the overall feeligs of the forum on the importance of family and their lifestyle. Well it probably could have been worded in such a way to make the message clearer but to myself it was very clear. The majority of the replies led me to ask myself why did it seem that most people simply took things at face value and didnt stop to consider the real question being posed.

My final answer was that as a whole it seems that the older the member the more defensive they are about their lifestyle choices. It seems to me that some people answered quickly and harshly as they may not have known themselves whether they would have been able to put their family first. It may also have been that they simply think that if they put family first and show they are famiy "men" then they might eventually get cut some slack when they come out to their family. maybe im way off base here but its what I saw personally of the way people responded. Now one person to me seemed to be trying to rationalise not taking the kid due to the main purpose of the trip. This was possibly a way of them saying that they may have chosen to dress and make excuses.

I cant say any of this for certain its just an opinion based on what i read in the thread in question and in some threads ive been reading back through. On the whole it seems to me the older we get the more defensive we get and the lpeople that are still in the closet seem to be the worst with it. I know they still either want or need to have their other life kept a mystery but sometimes being defensive only leads to more questions. ones that cant be answered so easy.

I may be jumping the gun and being a bit full of myself with all this and if i am then i blame my rash impulsive nature aka my age. Id just like some of your thoughts and opinions on what Ive been saying.

Before anyone starts in on me lets get a few things out of the way real quick. I didnt wanna clutter up Karrens thread with off-topic stuff thats why i made this thread. i dont wanna insult people or make them feel insecure or hurt Im just expressing an opinion based on what ive seen. if anyone is offended im sorry thats not my intention. Now please in your own time discuss it with me a little.

Wendy me
07-05-2006, 02:04 PM
well to start i am a son of my mom and dad and next i am a father to my two grown sons and a husband to my wife..... after that and only after that i am a cd that is the way it is family frist ..... have i pushed Wendy aside for family yes veary much so ...and no regretts...i am a "OLDER CD 40 SOMETHING" perhaps old school but doing the right thing might not always be the thing you want to do .......but in the end you know what you give up is well worth the thing you get ..... when you show your kids that thay come frist and that family is importen thats something thay will pass down to their own kids as well ........