dressing rooms

[Dana Jones]

Hi ladies, Went shopping the other day for bargains. I was in the local mall and went into Banana Republic. I have bought stuff there before. I checked out the sales rack and found a silk cami with no price. The nice sales girl about in her early fourties came up and asked if she could help. I asked the price. She checked and it was $16. I was debating because I have so many already. It was ok, but nothing spectacular. I asked if I could try it. I have done this in this store about 3 other times. She looked at me and then said sure and called a very young girl over to open the dressing room. She asked if she would let me in a dressing room and handed me the top. This wouldn't be so bad but the young girl was already bringing a gentle men to the dressing area and I felt like like, hey look at this guy trying on womens tops!! So she led both of us in and I thanked her holding my silk cami. She then said to the gentlemen "wait lets go down here, this is the womens side" Wow I turned about 80 shades of red. I decided not to buy. When I came out the original girl asked if there was anything else? I said no I have been embaressed enough for one day and left. It was just really weird. Usually everyone is very discrete and I have no problem. This day I felt like I was announced as a crossdresser. Dana

[tekla west]

Back when I spend a couple of decades with the Grateful Dead following me around the country one of my tour buddies always said "Sometimes your going to the show, sometimes your at the show, and sometimes you ARE the show."

That is when your know the spotlight is on you - and at the risk of creating another drama queen - you take that moment as your own.

PS, I imagine that for many girls in here what happened to you is a life-long dream. So go with it, in fact, the did give you what you wanted didn't they?

[Dana Jones]

If it was a room full of women I would have been thrilled. Another guy just makes me uncomfortable admitting I dress and I have dressed since I was probably 5 years old. Now I am 41. I am getting MUCH braver and an attitude that it is MY life.

[connie rotten]

Last month I went into a dressing room to try on some jeans and there were over half a dozen lady's wear outfits sizes 10 -12 hanging up in it. None of them was anything I would buy, but I did try them all on in every combination.The size 10s were not even a bit snug :happy:

[JasmineR]

Dana Jones Posted:

If it was a room full of women I would have been thrilled. Another guy just makes me uncomfortable admitting I dress and I have dressed since I was probably 5 years old. Now I am 41. I am getting MUCH braver and an attitude that it is MY life.

I'm the same way, if men are in the store I am a little less likely to make my CDing known.

But yes in most cases associates are nice about your dressing. She was just being rude.

It is funny though, I will go to Wet Seal sometimes and try things on... maybe even purchase... and they are not bashful at all. I'll walk out and they are like, did that work out for you. Not to be rude, they just act like it's a common occurance. No one seems to care that I'm coming out of the dressing room when that happens either.

[EricaCD]

Send am E-mail to Banana Republic's customer relations department. (The link will be on the web site.) Be sure to let them know that you have bought stuff at BR before, that you appreciated their policy of friendliness to all customers, and that you were treated inexcusably by a customer service rep at ____ store on ____ date at _____ time. You should also explain that they essentially lost two customers at once, as you will not be buying from them for your male wardrobe either.

Believe me, these complaints do not just go into the circular file. Every single retail store is currently in a sales deathmatch against the big box stores and online retailers. You may get some satisfaction.

More generally, I try to make a point of emailing customer relations for any retailer at which I have a notable experience (positive or negative) in doing shopping for women's clothes. We are actually a pretty big market - given the razor thin margins of the retail business. I am not an expert on retailing but I suspect that even small numbers of comments can cause a sizable shift in retailers' attitudes.

Erica

[SherryLynn GG]

Maybe its just me, but I dont see how this girl was being that rude....I mean im sure the other man wasnt blind and could see what was being tried on

Not to mention you said she was a young girl, maybe she was new, maybe she didnt realize what she was doing when she said that....maybe she didnt figure youd mind her saying it was the womens side since in fact you were trying on womens clothing0.02

[Dana Jones]

It was the older woman that I was upset about. I was quiet and discrete and very low voiced. She is the one who held the cami up and called across the dept. If I had mens clothes it wouldn't have bothered me. I was just trying to be low keyed and discrete and maybe it was no big deal to her but it was to me.

[SherryLynn GG]

Even still, im not understanding

Alot of the CDers on this board complain because they arent accepted, well she obviously didnt care what you were trying on but you expected her to go out of her way to make you more comfortable.

The way I see it, if you dont want people to know youre trying on womens clothes then maybe you shouldnt try them on in public places.

I dont mean to sound so harsh here but I dont see why a CDer should get "special" treatment when they go into a store just because they dont want people knowing what they do. If youre wanting to be equal to women then you should know that we deal with the same things. If we're trying something on that is sexy or revealing we may not want the whole store to know but I dont expect a certain salesperson to drop what she's doing to help me when another one is going to the dressing room.

Thats just my opinion. and my 0.02

Not trying to offend anyone :)

[suspender]

Who knows, the other guy could have been a CDr as well - he may have tried on his outfit in the mens area!

[EricaCD]

Sherry, to a degree your argument is fair. This is certainly not egregious conduct - we have heard of plenty of instances on this forum where a salesperson's conduct went well past insensitive to outrageous.

That said, I disagree with your implicit assertion that the salespeople did nothing wrong. To argue by analogy, perhaps you would not mind if you were lingerie shopping and the lady held up a bra you were considering and shouted across the store to another saleslady? Maybe you wouldn't care, but hopefully you would agree that this is not good form...

Usually a sales person shouldn't do a "handoff" to another sales clerk unless one clerk is front of shop and another is for dressing rooms. In the latter case, one would think that a salesperson wishing to deal politely with a crossdresser would come up with a more discreet way of flagging down her colleague. And the younger one could probably have come up with a more discreet way of suggesting that a crossdresser would be expected to try on clothes in the men's area. Perhaps to ask the customer to hold on while she attended to the other (male) customer?

In any case, what matters is that the two salespeople managed to embarrass a customer, through several missteps that cumulatively killed a sale. (Under the circumstances I would have been mortified.) I don't think this rises to the level of demanding special treatment: it is asking sales people to use their brains at least enough to recognize that this is an instance where a modicum of discretion would be called for.

Erica

[Jodi]

I spent the afternoon shopping. I was in drab. I spent about an hour in the BCBG/Max Azaria store. I tried on about 1/2 dozen outfits in the fitting room. When I came out, two women were standing there. They looked at me and I just smiled and said--great clothes. The one woman asked what I bought, and the other woman asked me how the fit was. Sorry to sound harsh, but if you are going to be afraid of life as a cd, jump into the closet and never come out. I went next to the Ninewest store. They had all their summer shoes on sale for $19.99. I spent about 45 minutes in there trying on shoes. The store was crowded (Sunday Afternoon always is). I was asked by one woman how a certain sandal fit and felt. Another remarked positively about my nice pedicure. Here I was, A guy among women, trying on shoes, and it was no big deal. I bought four pair of shoes. I'm sorry, but I don't think Dana's situation was that big of a deal. If something that minor is going to scare and embarrass you, then maybe you need some courage training. I'm sorry, I might be harsh, but you get no sympathy from me.

Jodi

[SherryLynn GG]

Usually a sales person shouldn't do a "handoff" to another sales clerk unless one clerk is front of shop and another is for dressing rooms. In the latter case, one would think that a salesperson wishing to deal politely with a crossdresser would come up with a more discreet way of flagging down her colleague. And the younger one could probably have come up with a more discreet way of suggesting that a crossdresser would be expected to try on clothes in the men's area. Perhaps to ask the customer to hold on while she attended to the other (male) customer? Erica

So basically they should have given him special treatment because he's a CDer?? Thats what im seeing here. How do you know that the other person wasnt for dressing rooms?? I mean she was already heading that way why couldnt she take care of it?? He's already said he wouldnt have said a word if he was trying on men's clothing but expected special treatment because he chose to try on womens clothing.

If you wanna get technical how do you know that they didnt think he was a woman??? I have an aunt that gets mistaken for a man all the time, people dont know whether to call her sir or Ma'am and she's not a CDer. Maybe they thought he was a woman and didnt wanna make him uncomfortable asking??? Unless you talk to these women you dont know what was going thru their heads, but still in my opinion they did their job, they treated him as they would any other customer which is HOW HE SHOULDA BEEN TREATED!!!

Again this is only my opinion and im not trying to offend, but I still dont see why these 2 ladies should get reported for doing their job.

[Tamara Croft]

Erica, I don't agree with what you are saying about making a complaint. Dana chose a top to try on, did he ask the sales lady to be discreteful about it? or did he just expect her to? It's not up to her to make him feel comfortable, its up the customer to make things perfectly clear in the first place. What is it with some Americans, they have to sue or make complaints about minor things?? You want them both to lose their jobs just because they didn't 'mind read' and make Dana feel comfortable? Wow, you know, that's really sad!!!

Dana - It's clear that they didn't care what you tried on in the shop, they probably see it all the time. But if you were so worried about it, then it's your own fault for not saying something. It's like buying a car, you don't expect the sales person to know exactly what you want when you walk into their showroom do you eh? No, you 'tell them' exactly want you want.

BTW, you are a crossdresser and if you don't want the whole world to know, then don't go trying on womens clothing in shops.

[Katrina]

I have mixed feelings on this one. If there was "yelling" across the store, I can see how that would be embarassing - heck, I would be slightly embarassed if it happened in the men's section and I was just trying on men's clothes. It just seems a bit classless. On the other hand, in order to try stuff on in a store, you are going to need to be a bit more thick-skinned. I'm not there yet and that's why I am very discreet when I do things like try on shoes although I'm getting more bold.

[Maria2004]

What is it with some Americans, they have to sue or make complaints about minor things??


I'm shocked and dismayed. (slaps Tamara for once) :straightface:

[Dana Jones]

I just equate this with the guy in the grocery store and the cashier pages for a price check on the preperation H. I am not overly concerned but was uncomfortable being in drab on my lunch.

[Caitlintgsd]

It was the older woman that I was upset about. I was quiet and discrete and very low voiced. She is the one who held the cami up and called across the dept. If I had mens clothes it wouldn't have bothered me. I was just trying to be low keyed and discrete and maybe it was no big deal to her but it was to me.

I recall a time when I was purchasing a bra at a Lane Bryant's. I took the item up to the register and set it down on the counter. This little bimbo stood there waving the bra above her head as high as she could while she was completing the transaction. I noticed that I never saw her in there again. I'm sure that I wasn't the only person to recieve her special treatment.

[GG Vanya]

I don't see the grief in this either.

You were trying on something from the ladies department, she called the dressing room attendant back to unlock the doors. The attendant already had a guy wanting to try something on, so she directed you to the ladies dressing room, and the man to the men's dressing room.

Where's the rub?

I think if the sales clerks had given you preferential treatment, and acted all hush hush it would have created a scene.

As it was, they treated you as if it was NO BIG DEAL.

Sounds to me as if clerks can't please some CD's either way.

I'm with Tamara on this...write to the home office? Sheeeeesh, maybe if you do that they'll roll out the red carpet next time you deign to darken their doors. At least the carpet will match your face, no?

[Maria2004]

Sounds to me as if clerks can't please some CD's either way.



Sounds to me like some GG's like to bring their anti-CD and anti-American agenda to the wrong sub-forum. Glad you and Tamara are great friends :hugs: You have Tamara's "back" because you know where she's coming from, and I have Dana's back because I know where he's coming from, what's next? :straightface:

[Tamara Croft]

I'm shocked and dismayed. (slaps Tamara for once) :straightface:I said 'some' and don't you slap me, I slap harder :slap: !!!! besides, it's true what I said.

This young sales girl, what if...... I said 'if' so take notes now ;) what if, she is a one parent family, struggling to make ends meet, then along comes a guy who didn't get preferencial treatment to try on a 'womans' top in the 'womans' department!!!!!! complains that he didn't get treated right and she gets sacked. How nice is that..... all because she actually treated Dana like just another customer and didn't really care what he was trying on.

Can you not see how all this looks? Just because you are a crossdressers, does not mean you should get special treatment in shops. You are no different to any other person trying on clothes, whatever it is you're trying on.

[tekla west]

No, I should not get special treatment because I'm a CD. I should get special treatment because I'm just so darn wonderful.

[Maria2004]

Can you not see how all this looks? Just because you are a crossdressers, does not mean you should get special treatment in shops. You are no different to any other person trying on clothes, whatever it is you're trying on.

Totally agreed Tamara, but it's takes a CD time to learn this, and it's a "human" condition, not a country of origin condition. I saw your reply to the ignorent post about WWII, I agreed with your reply, it happened twice WWI too :happy: I read UK news, I'm aware of the 7-7 bombings rememberence and "blame" = USA . Seems you were kinda sensitive about "Americans" in this reply to what is a common thread. Your an "Admin" and slap "hard" :love:

[GG Vanya]

Sounds to me like some GG's like to bring their anti-CD and anti-American agenda to the wrong sub-forum. Glad you and Tamara are great friends :hugs: You have Tamara's "back" because you know where she's coming from, and I have Dana's back because I know where he's coming from, what's next? :straightface:


ROFLMAO PIMP even...anti CD? My dear ill informed friend...I am married to a CD because I chose to marry one! I didn't find out after marriage like some SO's here did. Obviously you haven't bothered to check out my previous posts LOL....I absolutely LOVE the fact that my husband is a CD...

Anti AMERICAN? Again my dear ill informed friend...I am 1/2 Cherokee..you know...the ORIGINAL Americans???

And just because I happen to agree with Tamara on something does not mean we're "great friends", but if we are, is there something wrong with that?

Now, got any more flaming arrows you care to sling my way?? If so, make sure you don't go off half cocked and totally miss. :tongueout

BTW, I'm sorry someone pooped in your Post Toasties today...t'wasn't me so give it a rest already.

[Karren H]

Exactually why I like stores with unassisted dressing rooms. No one really needs to know what I'm trying on.. Kohl's is my favorite... There the sales clerks usually compliment me on my taste in womens clothing when I check out!! :D

If I were you I'd shop somewhere else and write a letter and tell the company why!!

Love Karren

[Nike]

both Vanya and Tamara.

"Sounds to me as if clerks can't please some CD's either way."

"What is it with some Americans, they have to sue or make complaints about minor things??"

Now here's why.

First, SOME of the CD's here are stuck in adolescence and haven't taken personal responsibility for their actions. As a result, they feel they are victims of the RE-actions of others to their acts. As Vanya said, the clerk treated it as if it were no big deal. That Dana was embarassed is the product of her own surprise that the other MAN was not also a CD and the casual nature of acceptance of the clerk. Indeed, as if it were no big deal at all.

About the anti-American sentiment, I don't believe it was such. I do agree that the victim society which is being forced upon the masses in North America is no different than any other society hell bent for election of a so-called politically correct, socialist society.

Perhaps the moral to this story (I know morals aren't very PC anymore, but I'm old and hold dearly to the values which have created GREAT societies) is that the old sage was right when they said;

"Sometimes, discretion IS the better part of Valor".

[DanielleAnne]

Hello, Dana's experience reminds me when at a Meijer checkout lane the cashier Felt It Neccessary to hang up HIGH the bras I was buying for everybody to see. So to Dana's detractors should i have just said "Hey everybody I am buying bras for myself holding them up high see yeah there for me yeah me! As I am sure Dana was shooting for less confrontation as possible. That is my oppinion.

Danielle Anne

[Tamara Croft]

This should not have happened and you should complain to the store manager and to upper management via web site.

In the company policy they state that they do not discriminate
against anyone and one case is too many. If you complain you will
be taken very seriously.Uhm, excuse me but, there was NO discrimination here and certainly NOTHING to warrant a complaint. The girl simply took Dana to the dressing room and showed him where the mens room was. What was so WRONG about that?

I said it twice now and I'll say it again, why do 'some' (I said 'some' not 'all' there is a difference) Americans always have to take the sodding high moral ground about something so trivial. It really is pathetic.

How do you know the other guy wasn't a CD? He never said anything did he? Quit bloody complaining about such trivial things and grow up already. :thumbsdn: :thumbsdn: :thumbsdn: :thumbsdn: :thumbsdn: :thumbsdn: :thumbsdn: :thumbsdn:

[Nike]

"This day I felt like I was announced as a crossdresser" Dana

Hello.. is anybody home??? YOU went into a public retail store, a VERY popular one at that, asked to try on an article of WOMENS clothing and you feel that THEY outted YOU?

"the cashier Felt It Neccessary to hang up HIGH the bras I was buying for everybody to see" Danielle Anne

Did she climb a step ladder? Probably not, it was just a place that stores have to place HANGING garments. A man buying a bra is no big deal, I've done it both for myself AND for my wife. First, NOBODY CARES. They're too busy with the stresses and duties of their own lives. If one is too unimiginative to simply say to anyone who might inquire, "they're for my wife/girlfriend", then you probably shouldn't be out unsupervised anyway, you might get hurt.

[SherryLynn GG]

I am Andrea, and happen to work for Banana Republic in VA.
I am a TS and work there as a lady, I am out to all employees
and management. Some customers know some do not. I am one
of very few TG employees nation wide for BR. This should not
have happened and you should complain to the store manager
and to upper management via web site.
In my store all fitting rooms are unisex, no womens or mens side.
Men can be next to women, all rooms have locking doors. We have
had very gay males next to straight males next to women both
young and old. If asked we say the fitting rooms are all unisex
and none have complained. The customers seem to like me and I
work the womens side of the store 95% of the time. I have been
there 7 years, hired as a TS and have been the #1 salesperson
every year. I think it is a case of "trans eye for the straight woman".
In the company policy they state that they do not discriminate
against anyone and one case is too many. If you complain you will
be taken very seriously. you may be the one who helps create a
policy about dealing with CDs and TGs for BR. Banana Republic is
owned by Gap, if you were not aware

As we all know alot of stores vary from state to state so why would the girl said there was a men's side if there wasnt???

And im sure they dont discriminate against anyone, as most stores dont...BUT as someone said before this wasnt discrimination.

And im curious as to why a store should have a specific policy for handling CDers?? Why shouldnt they be treated just like anyone else??

And as far as reporting this?? what is there to report?? What is he gonna say?? Im a man, I wanted to try on womens clothing and they were gonna let me but then I got embarrassed and left?? How in the world is that the stores fault???

I agree with what someone else said, if something this small is gonna embarrass you then maybe you shouldnt try on the clothes in public. And I certainly do not think a store should have a policy for handling CDers. They are people just like I am and should be treated just like I am when I go into a store.

I swear this thread amazes me :rolleyes:

[princessmichelle]

Hi,
It's funny: my own experience is that if a clerk is rude when I'm buying men's clothes I get over it, but I am far more sensitive to quality of customer service when trying on women's clothes.

Maybe it's fear.

princessmichelle

[HaleyPink2000]

:D OK, my take on this is, it's your choice where you shop. If you don't like the place, don't go back! It's why we live under the red white and blue, to give you your choice. It's really most likely just human, when things like that happen. I'd not get my panties in a wad over it. :happy:

I go try on at many stores and sometimes I'm using the Men's side to try on dresses. I came there in drab and they are just treating me like any other Man. But when I come en femme I'm sent to the female rooms to try on clothing. I don't care if the people around me know I am shopping for femme clothing. I guess some do, get over it. :rolleyes: Most people don't care that you are shopping for female clothing.:heehee:


Just My0.02 LOLO:D

[kristytv]

i am a total mutt , but i am part american indian too , my grandfather is almost full ottwa

[Lady Jayne]

Hi ladies, Went shopping the other day for bargains. I was in the local mall and went into Banana Republic. I have bought stuff there before. I checked out the sales rack and found a silk cami with no price. The nice sales girl about in her early fourties came up and asked if she could help. I asked the price. She checked and it was $16. I was debating because I have so many already. It was ok, but nothing spectacular. I asked if I could try it. I have done this in this store about 3 other times. She looked at me and then said sure and called a very young girl over to open the dressing room. She asked if she would let me in a dressing room and handed me the top. This wouldn't be so bad but the young girl was already bringing a gentle men to the dressing area and I felt like like, hey look at this guy trying on womens tops!! So she led both of us in and I thanked her holding my silk cami. She then said to the gentlemen "wait lets go down here, this is the womens side" Wow I turned about 80 shades of red. I decided not to buy. When I came out the original girl asked if there was anything else? I said no I have been embaressed enough for one day and left. It was just really weird. Usually everyone is very discrete and I have no problem. This day I felt like I was announced as a crossdresser. Dana

I have read and re-read this post my feelings are you should indeed write to the head office, first I would congratulate them on their policy of acceptance towards CD's secondly I would ask them to pass on my thanks to the two sales assistants who obviously took my enquiry totaly in their stride by treating me as they would any other coustomer, I would then describe what happened as you did in your post and explain that you ended up bieng embarressed because of the presence of the other coustomer and that although the sales assistants are obviously completly at ease and used to dealing with the CD community some of us are still very nervouse and it may be worth briefing out to all employees that this should be rememberd and employees should try to be as discreet as possible when dealing with them.

I think they did nothing wrong but with a little awarness and training they could have been a bit more discreet.

[Rickie]

I think maybe Dana should go back to the store and talk to the SA. Tell her how she embarasses her. And do it in a kind and caring way. I think that would do more good in the public relation department.

Also I believe if you look deep everyone is right in some small way.

[Priscilla Ann]

Again this is only my opinion and im not trying to offend, but I still dont see why these 2 ladies should get reported for doing their job.

Unless things have changed, customer satisfaction is one of the jobs of a salesperson. By writing and explaining what his problem was would he not provide the ladies with insight as to how to do their job better in the future should a similiar situation occur? Happy customers equals more sales.

If in fact they did do their jobs in accordance with company policy, this letter or e-mail will not be seen as a compliant but as a compliment. It will show that the ladies did what they were supposed to do.

[SherryLynn GG]

I do not know if this person was discriminated against, too few details.
I do think someone left the store because they were made to feel embarassed. the situation could have been handled with a bit more finesse
and care. this could have been aided by some employee training. when we have handicapped customers, there is a large fitting room if they need it. ladies with baby carriages can use it. families can use it anyone who wants the big room can use them. we try to accomadate all customers. should i treat a lady with a stroller or a person in a wheelchair just like everyone else or should i make their shopping experiance a bit easier by doing what it takes to help them. many people have never had any problems due to their lifestyle
and seem unwilling to understand and accept that others in fact do. So maybe ease up and try to understand what life may be like for the worlds minorities.
take care all

A person in a wheelchair or pushing a baby carriage is a totally different situation than a CDer....A person in a wheelchair DOESNT HAVE A CHOICE!! They cant fit in a smaller dressing room so of course they should be given a bigger dressing room. Same thing as a woman with a baby carriage.

We're talking about a man that chose to try on womens clothing in a public store, WHY should he be treated any differently than a man trying on mens clothing or a woman trying on womens clothing?? He's a man NOT a minority. Im sorry but youre not gonna change my view on this. CDers do NOT deserve special treatment in a store.

I was talking to my husband about this last night and he said if he ever wanted to try on clothes in a store that he would wanna be treated just the same as I would if I was trying them on since in fact he's wanting to feel like a woman NOT a minority or a "special" customer.

[Karren H]

Hi,
It's funny: my own experience is that if a clerk is rude when I'm buying men's clothes I get over it, but I am far more sensitive to quality of customer service when trying on women's clothes.

Maybe it's fear.

princessmichelle

Rude is rude no matter what I'm buying. So I vote with my feet and my purse!! And I don't hold a gruge more than a couple decades or so!! Most of the stores that I will never go into again have gone out of business!! Coincidence? I think not...

So don't get mad.....get even! Hehehe

Love Karren

[tekla west]

I'm a bear of very little brain, and when I want to buy food, I go to a grocery store. When I want to buy clothes, I go to a clothing store. And so on. I like having people serving me who have some idea of what they are doing. I like having sales persons who know their merch, and help with suggestions. I like shopping in stores where I can talk to the owner and higher management (Macy's notwithstanding). I like buying clothes from women who look good in what they are wearing. I like being a repeat customer, so I can get that special service I desire.

When the Macy's sales staff went out on strike a few years ago myself, and a few others I know, made a point of going up to the picket line, telling the clerks they had our total support and that there was NO WAY, we would was cross their line untill they settled the strike. (As a journeyman AFL/CIO member, from a union family, there is no way I would ever cross a picket line, and my kids would not either. I did try to raise them right and all.) I wound up having a few interesting conversations with the sales girls doing that. Do those ladies remember me? Damn skippy they do. Do they serve me? You bet, and they are great to me and the girls I shop with. They remember that I supported them, so they support me. Easy as that. Its also Macy's corporate policy not to discriminate against transgender shoppers. Goodwill likewise has a similar corporate policy, and I support them what supports me. If I can't try it on, then I obviously can't buy it.

And I thought all shopping was supposed to be like that. I have couple of neighborhood bars I frequent Drag and Drab,makes no difference to me or to them. Either way, I tip heavy. Does it make a difference? Well, there are nights when I can't buy a drink in there because they are all comped for me by Melissa or Sean. I tip REAL heavy for those, as you are supposed to. And even when I'm not getting them on the house, no matter how busy they are, no matter how many tourists are in there (I live in a big tourist neighborhood - North Beach) my drink is there before I even get to the counter. It's like Cheers, except my name is not Norm.

The point is - and I think our Euro sisters know it much better than we do, despite our absolute manic mania for material consumption for the sake of consumption - that the real root of the buyer/seller transaction is not the money or the goods, its about the relationship. And I try to only shop in places that understand that.

[HaleyPink2000]

Rude is rude no matter what I'm buying. So I vote with my feet and my purse!! And I don't hold a gruge more than a couple decades or so!! Most of the stores that I will never go into again have gone out of business!! Coincidence? I think not...

So don't get mad.....get even! Hehehe

Love Karren

0.02 Like I said earlier in this thred. The American way is to just stop buying there. After they piss enough people off " Like Karren indicated " they won't be in business. :D

[Tamara Croft]

:OMG: Listen to some of you, it's like listening to a child having a tantrum..... 'write and complain' 'shouldn't have been treated like that'... blah blah blah..... 'oh woe is me' sheesh.... get a grip, it's not the end of the world is it!?!?! The staff aren't MIND READERS, the staff DON'T ALWAYS KNOW, the customers AREN'T ALWAYS RIGHT EITHER!!!!!

I can imagine all the poor souls you have complained about for not giving you special treatment because you're a CD.... and then you wonder why you're not accepted in places, what the hell do you expect with a lame ass attitude like that eh? :loser:

[Kimberly]

If it was a room full of women I would have been thrilled. Another guy just makes me uncomfortable admitting I dress and I have dressed since I was probably 5 years old. Now I am 41. I am getting MUCH braver and an attitude that it is MY life.
Shame?

Let's not be shameful of what makes you, you.

[Jodi]

As Tekla said about getting to know the SA's, I too have said in other posts about the importance of building a rapport with a store and with SA's. THis is not done overnight. This takes time, effort and repeated shopping in the same store with the same SA's. I have over a dozen stores that I have done this. Shopping is not only easy, but it is fun. The managers and SA's know me and expect me to take time and visit with them while I'm there. There are 6 stores that I can think of right now that call me at home to inform me of any special sales. When some of the stores know I'm looking for a specific item, they will call me when it comes in, and will lay it back and hold it for me. You don't get this kind of service from shopping in a store once and then complaining about service. You get this from shopping often, being friendly and honest, being courteous, and, at least, buying something if an SA has taken a lot of time with you.

Jodi

[Dana Jones]

Man My first thread and This is not worth the fighting. I will just be more careful so I don't put myself in an uncomfortable situation for MY comfort level. I am not going to write and complain. It was my problem obviously! I was told that loud and clear and fine. We are supposed to stick together and I feel I started a war. I am truely sorry and will try to keep my post non-contriversial. Thanks for the support and for the comments weather for or against I will learn from all. Dana

[HaleyPink2000]

Your not going to post so the rest of us can rant? Hmmm? Where is the fun in that? Thanks for the thred! :D

[Toni]

I have never had the bottle to go into a shop and ask to try on ladies clothes but if I ever did I would be really chuffed to be treated the way Dana was. I don't think we want special treatment we just want to be treated normally as was the case here. I just can't see where the embarrasment came in and I totally agree with everything Tamara has said, especially about the complaining culture of you people on the other side of the pond. By the way just for the yanks chuffed means delighted.

[GG Vanya]

Quite a few of us on "this side of the pond" agreed with Tamara as well. Hell I even got accused of "having Tamara's back" <smirk>

Yes, there does seem to be the contingent of perpetual complainers, but I dare say it's no more prevalent here than any other part of the big blue marble.

Yes, Americans are spoiled, and perhaps some take that phrase "land of the free, and the home of the brave" to mean they have the right to be more vocal about things that displease them.

We have this little thing called Freedom of Speech here, and I'm all for it. But, as is true with all freedoms, your right should end at exactly the point at which it infringes on the rights of another. A very simplistic example: You have every right to swing your fists in the air until you pass out from exhaustion, but when and if said fist makes contact with my nose, your rights just ended.

The woman was just doing her job. I think she did it, from the story we got, very well. To have her job threatened because someone felt they had a right to privacy and discretion in a PUBLIC store, is just WRONG.

[lisa68]

That's why there's a difference between a mature women and alittle girl. RESPECT!

[CHRISTINA_CD_TX]

You May Also Have A State Or Local Law Issue. Here In Texas Its Against The Law To Use The Opposite Sex Restroom Or Dressing Room. Doing So Can Get You Arrested And In Some Cases Put In The Same Catagory As A Sexual Preditor With Mandatory Registration. Your Best To Use A Dressing Room Such As Ave And Others That Have Single Dressing Rooms. Ones That Have Defined Male And Female Rooms Will Fall Under That States Laws For Use.

[Maria2004]

ROFLMAO PIMP even...anti CD? My dear ill informed friend...I am married to a CD because I chose to marry one! I didn't find out after marriage like some SO's here did. Obviously you haven't bothered to check out my previous posts LOL....I absolutely LOVE the fact that my husband is a CD...

Anti AMERICAN? Again my dear ill informed friend...I am 1/2 Cherokee..you know...the ORIGINAL Americans???

And just because I happen to agree with Tamara on something does not mean we're "great friends", but if we are, is there something wrong with that?

Now, got any more flaming arrows you care to sling my way?? If so, make sure you don't go off half cocked and totally miss. :tongueout

BTW, I'm sorry someone pooped in your Post Toasties today...t'wasn't me so give it a rest already.

Sorry about that Vanya, I wasn't trying to pick on you, I had read your previous posts. I was trying to engage someone much more intersting (Tamara). you were kinda like a "dupe". I was a llama once myself, stick around a decade or 2, you may learn how to enjoy internet diversity :hugs: