Tell my brother?

[StephanieCD]

I've been thinking a lot about telling someone lately - mostly because you ladies ;)

My brother would no doubt be understanding - he might well be freaked out for a minute but he'd be cool with it. He's more open-minded than I am, really.

I don't know though. He kind of looks up to me now, always has, and I'm terrified of losing that. I fear what he'd think of me - even though I secretly think he might have a history of dressing himself... just MAYBE.

What have you gained from telling a family member, personally? Is it just a selfish need to get it out or did it bring you closer? What's the best way to tell? I fancy myself good with a written word but my mouth doesn't work as well.

I don't know - just been thinkin' is all. Any input on how or why one should tell a family member when there's no real reason?

[Tristen Cox]

Honestly if there's no real need then why do you want to tell him? I can say that my 'outing' did infact bring me closer to my mother and it's much better being able to show my whole self rather than a part. But weigh your decision wisely before making that step. It's of course your choice and I wish you the best whatever you decide.

Love
Tristen

[Sharon]

Stephanie,
I only just came out to my sister last week! And in two days, I'll be confiding my secret to my other sister.
I have managed to keep Sharon from them for three decades, and for all but the past couple years, I have been glad to keep them in the dark. But as I have evolved and developed and begun to stand on my own two feet (so to speak), I simply couldn't keep it from them any longer. And yes, I too was afraid of losing their respect. It just got to the point that I felt I had no choice.
You need to follow what your heart tells you. Ask yourself why you want to confide in your brother. If you like the answer, then you must do it!
Good luck, no matter which decision you make.
Love,
Sharon

[Amelie]

Like the others have said before me here, is there a need to tell him?
Although I was never close to my brothers and sisters, but because of my dressing it has made us further apart. This is a choice I made, I accept this situation.
You have to take into consideration that this could be your outcome if you tell him.
From what I read in your post, you do have a good relationship with your bro, so it could have a happier outcome than mine.
Love Amelie

[StephanieCD]

He'd accept me - hell, I wouldn't believe it if he didn't rib me about it once in a while... besides, as an actor, he owned wigs before I did and we used to pick on him about the stubble on his legs... SO - I'm thinking he'd be ok with it.

As for reasons to tell him... perhaps just because he has told me that he feels sometimes I'm distant, like he doesn't know the real me - no one knows me as well as him, except that. Perhaps I want to tell him out of respect, to let him truly in. I have no personal desire to share or release myself - it's primarily sexual for me so why'd I want to share with my bro? I'm wondering if that'd be a case of "too much information" however... I probably will never tell him unless we happen by a big bottle and several hours alone, ya know?

[Wenda]

You have to do what you have to do, but, as the others have said, don't do it unless you have thought it through. In a thread some time ago, I described telling my daughter, by email. She was ok with it, and advised that her older brother, my oldest son, also was into dressing.
She and he are close, and in the last week or two, she shared the information with him. He emailed me a few days ago, and we have e-chatted. He told me how one girlfriend, who was bisexual, who encouraged it. Then a second girlfriend, who, mine son says, got to enjoy it too much, so much that it became a problem in their relationship.
We have echatted extensively. We have always been pretty close, and I feel better about the secret being lifted. For me and my family, sharing the secret has been positive. good luck, wenda.

[Vallari]

Well in my expierence of telling my parents about my CD'ing I can say it's brought us closer. But I've heard horror stories from many others though. I dont know what your situation is but I guess if you feel he is a good safe person to tell this too then go for it - just be careful. They say gurls take this kind of news better then guys do in general, and from my dealings with friends in the past concerning CD'ing, it still seems to hold true. But if u say hes cool with it then I would go for it - just b careful!