gay bars

[hillary_lng]

i was wondering if all or at least most of the gay bars except transgendered people.i want to go out badly ,i just want to go somewhere where they except you for who you are.thanks hillary

[Kieron Andrew]

where are you located hillary? as most if not all the gay bars i have been accept Trans within their establishments!

[Carroll]

The Common Ground in Ithaca, NY is....come to think of it...the city doesnt bat an eye at LGBT people:happy:

http://cafeutne.org/towns/ithaca.html
Carroll

[Rachel Morley]

OK, there are gay bars and there are gay bars. However, speaking personally, every single gay bar (bar one - excuse the pun) in my life has seemed accepting of us. Of the ones I've been in, there were lots of GGs..presumably lesbians. Go for it, after all we are the "T" in GBLT.

[mskilmer]

This is a really interesting topic for me. Maybe I'm just weird, but I've never been to a gay bar. I LOVE going out, but I always just go to a nice "regular" bar or restaurant. I especially like brew pubs, because I'm really into beer. I sit at the bar usually, and just mind my own business. I think it's great fun, but I'm a bit of a loner at heart. Is the benefit of gay bars that it's easier to interact with others while there? Please don't think I'm trying to be obtuse. My personality just may not be the gay bar type.

[nicki]

Most do except t gurls..if your not sure make a phone call . They would be more than glad to explain

[tekla west]

never had a problem in a gay bar, I've only been doing it for a few decades and coast to coast, so maybe I don't get out much.

[Calliope]

This is a really interesting topic for me. Maybe I'm just weird, but I've never been to a gay bar. I LOVE going out, but I always just go to a nice "regular" bar or restaurant. I especially like brew pubs, because I'm really into beer. I sit at the bar usually, and just mind my own business. I think it's great fun, but I'm a bit of a loner at heart.

Ditto, I'd rather have lots of GGs around, plus I like things quiet and without the sexual vibe. Of course, I'm ancient!

[Mitzi]

Don't know whether it's still like that, but back in the 80's I went into a gay bar in San Francisco's Castro en femme. Nothing but guys, and they seemed very uneasy with my presence. So I left.

Another time, I went dressed to a gay bar in downtown San Francisco. Again all guys, but less unease, more like "does she realize where she is" sorta feel.

I kinda think they thought I was GG (I hope). The bartender was a bit tentative at first, but then realized I was CD, and treated me very nicely, almost as if to let the others know I was okay.

On the other hand, girl bars, if not welcoming, just didn't seem to care.

Mitzi

[trannie T]

When I go out it is usually to a gay bar because I know that I will be safe and not harrassed. A few leather bars have not been real friendly but every other place I've been has been accepting and welcoming. Amazingly on two occasions I've met women in gay bars while I've been en femme. Nothing much developed but it does make things a bit easier, never have to make that talk, "Honey, I like to wear panties."

[Carroll]

Most do except t gurls..if your not sure make a phone call . They would be more than glad to explain
except=Accept :happy:

[judyw9]

..you will find some clubs that are TG friendly or even TG owned. That to me at least seems safer.

[JoannaDees]

I don't know. Gay bars are so ..... gay! Go to Hooters. Give 'em hell baby!

Seriously, gay bars are OK. They'll ignore you. Go to bars frequented by TV's. Sony, Mitsubishi and the like. Go widescreen though.

[Joy Carter]

I have heard that one known gay bar in Toledo had beaten up on a CD who stumbled in there establishment unawares. So don't just take the bartenders word for it go in drab first to make sure.

[typical_guy]

Well, I went to a gay club with a gay friend of mine. I went in drab the first time to get a feel for it so I totally agree with Joy. Go in drab and you can see if there are many other CDers and you can get an idea of what they're wearing. The place I went to - pretty much anything went. It's great fun to be able to go out dressed. There's a lot of gay guys there but there's some GGs, usually there with their gay male friends. The club I've gone to is:
http://www.chaosdc.com/

If you're ever in the DC area and want to go out on a Friday or Saturday dressed, I'd recommend that place. They have a drag show on the weekends too. Make sure you bring some $1 bills. You can give them to the people you like in the show. They come over and take them from you, it's a lot of fun.

[danielle_from_cal]

I don't know where you live. It may be that the only place you can go is a gay bar. I have lived in a few different cities , and travel to many more, and have found that you can go to almost all places "dressed up". I would go to a gay bar if I was looking for a man (and I would go as a man). Otherwise, just enjoy being the girl you want to be and go to any bar or other establishment and feel like you. Crossdressing has nothing to do with being gay anyway. If I wanted to go to a bar now, I would rather go to a lesbian place than hang around with a bunch of men! But, really, I would rather just go to a "normal" place, like a neighbourhood bar.

[connie rotten]

Most gay dance clubs welcome us with open arms. As far as bars go alot of them can be for a certan sciene like the leather crowd or Lesbians only. I wouldn't prance into just any gay bar all dolled up. Like I said dance clubs are the best bet. Be sure to find out what bathroom you can use. Some of my lesbian friends are totally against us using their womans bathroom. Other places no one cares what bathroom we use.
Be sure to have a purse that goes with your shoes to carry your ID,your keys, some money, and for just in case you meet some one condoms.
Have fun:happy:

[sterling12]

Hi everybody:

Here are some of my humble experiences. Other's will probably disagree, but I've been into more than a few Gay Bars with my Sista's and the consensus is:

1.)Gay people are pretty accepting of alternative lifestyles, why shouldn't they be, they happen to be "alternative" themselves.

2.) Most of them really don't quite understand us. They figure if you are dressed and in a Gay Club you are "trolling". It really throws them when they strike up a conversation and you let them know that you are straight, if that's the case. If your in a Gay Bar,they rightly assume that you are like some DQ's and actively looking. If you are candid and tell them upfront, you can often make a new friend. However, after you come around a few times and people begin to get used to you, the folks in Gay Bars tend to "thaw out" and you will get plenty of questions and conversation. Do expect to be "hit on", usually gently....but it will happen.

3.) All of the above information kind of gets thrown out if you are in a place that has a mixture of everyone from The GLBT Community. In these Clubs they already know most of the above information and the rules change. In these types of clubs, you will be dealing with guys who are attracted to TG Girls and you will have to deal with that.

4.) If you go to a Gay Club that has lot's of our Lesbian Sisters, be discreet and wait for them to make contact. The "Lipstick Variety" is usually somewhat sympathetic and they understand a craving for femininity. However, be aware that your actions can be misconstrued by The "Other" Variety. Who may take offense, if you are talking to their "squeeze". They could perceive you as a competitor and could react in a similar manner to a Territorial male.

It gets complicated doesn't it? Take heart, these are my experiences and yours will probably be different. Go out have fun, be careful, don't go home with anybody that you just met. If you can find CD companions, it gets a lot easier. We will see you at the Club. If your in The Clearwater, Florida Area just ask around, they know where they can find us on a Saturday Night.

Peace and Love, Joanie

[Kate Simmons]

Some gay bars can be quite cliqueish, Hon. Fortunately, the one I go to isn't. I suggest you go as your guy self first, even if not for a long while and ask the bartender if CD's are welcome. If it's positive, then go next time as your femme self. Ericka

[Tina Dixon]

There's Gigi's in Detroit if your in the area.

[allisonrn06]

I have never been to a gay bar but have chatted with cd'ers online who have.More than one has told me that bars that they have gone too have not been accepting of cd's- they said that most gay men are not looking for cd's and lesbians feel threatened by them(competition).These people told me that they go to clubs that are specifically cd oriented.

[Kate Simmons]

I have never been to a gay bar but have chatted with cd'ers online who have.More than one has told me that bars that they have gone too have not been accepting of cd's- they said that most gay men are not looking for cd's and lesbians feel threatened by them(competition).These people told me that they go to clubs that are specifically cd oriented.
Most of the gay guys won't give me the time of day as Ericka but as Richard, it's a different story. Still, some of them are pretty nice and they are my friends regardless. A few of them love dancing with me as Ericka but you have to be careful and selective as I said before. Ericka

[Deidra Cowen]

I've been to tons of gay bars in a lot of cities. 99% of the time I find that I am accepted and have no troubles. Matter of fact I have fun. The only thing to watch out for are the leather bars...they for sure do like CDs at those joints! :eek: Also be very careful at a 100% lesbian bar...but I find lesbian bars that also have a few gay guys at are always kewl. For example the Red Chair in Atlanta.

But indeed let us know where you are at. Somebody might be able to clue you in on where to go.

[Patty]

I went to my first gay bar last night. Both female and male and some sister CD's. There was no dance floor just a pool table. Everyone was friendly - will go back.

[Sky]

i was wondering if all or at least most of the gay bars except transgendered people.i want to go out badly ,i just want to go somewhere where they except you for who you are.thanks hillary

"Most" maybe, "all" absolutely not.

Always check before making assumptions. If you're planning to go to a bar, gay or not, check it in drab first, look around, talk to the regulars, and if you're still not sure what kind of crowd they welcome ask the bartender, plain and simple.

I remember going to a gay bar with a friend who told me great things about the joint. Well, that was because he wasn't a cd. :sad: While nothing truly bad happened, the regulars made sure I knew I was not welcome. So don't assume things or take somebody else's advice blindly: always check yourself first.

[Jessica Brekke]

Always check before making assumptions. If you're planning to go to a bar, gay or not, check it in drab first, look around, talk to the regulars, and if you're still not sure what kind of crowd they welcome ask the bartender, plain and simple.


I actually did this last night. I went and checked out a bar in the L.A. area that was supposed to be very TG friendly, and gosh darned if it wasn't! Unfortunately for me, it reminded me of just how much I hated bars when I was younger... Apparently, that hasn't changed, I left after a half an hour. :rolleyes: But, it's nice to know that there are places out there to mingle should I ever get the urge.

[tekla west]

Perhaps its only my delusion, my own personal bit of tekla exceptionalism , but I have forever thought - and not matter how I'm dressed - that people's reaction to me was largely dependent on me. Upon how I acted, reacted and interacted with the people there.

Ya know, ya come in (sort of eased in, your not all that comfortable and it shows) you lurk around the edges, almost hiding. Your wig is pulled low on your forehead to help hide your face in case you saw anyone on the way over. Your sitting all covered and Miss Modest, because you don't have enough public practice (and hence are not in touch with) how you REALLY WEAR those clothes and let the girl shine through. So, hunched, hiding and obviously uncomfortable on the periphery and not in the middle of things, who be a predator would WANT to come and talk to you?

OR ----- You come in sunshine and roses trailing clouds of glory and start giving big a "HI" to all you see, each one lit up with a smile - I mean you OWN that room. You go to where the people are gathered, glide up on that barstool and cross your legs and fix your skirt and order a drink, and its a whole different world.

You want to be the girl, you have to sell it baby.

[tekla west]

Re-reading that post above - the same works for shopping too.

[nicki]

I have been to both types of bars for many years. I have good times at both i must say, but i tend to lean more towards cd clubs,,like other's have said before,,it tends to be more relaxed and anything goes. As far as being hit on,, hey. thats comes with it and its alright by me.

[DonnaT]

Some are, some aren't, and some that are aren't as much as some others that are. :D

If they have drag shows every once in a while, chances are that it is one of the more accepting.

And even that's not always the case. One of two gay bars in Richmond VA not far apart has a better accepting atmosphere than the other, but both have drag performances. The better one even has a special night for TGs.

[Dee 1062]

I find most will,but a few all male bars, won't throw you out,they just won't make you feel real welcome..
http://www.somewhereelseclub.com/

[Deidra Cowen]

Heatherhose we got our own place to go its called the Stage Door and its in the Atlanta area! You should come by on Saturday night and check it out. I promise you its totally friendly and while we don't makeup the majority of the crowd unless its a really huge turnout we rule the roost regardless there!

Everyone from the Bar Owner, Bartenders, staff like Kelly! and other patrons love us and we just about run da joint! Now get that bootie to da Stage Door!!! :tongueout

[Dee 1062]

Check this thread...http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?t=34148