Still confused....what would you classify myself as?

[Ranee Daze]

1 - I dress to go out only, shopping, to concerts, movies and ballet, but never to clubs
2 - My true identity is a secret.
3 - Heterosexual and fetishistic.
4 - No interest in 24/7 dressing.
5 - No interest in transexxualism for myself.

Again, I think it would help the forum alot if we had some reliable terms posted for the general states of crossdressing.

[Bev06 GG]

Me too Ranee to all the above. So whats that make me. I wouldn't worry unduly, were all quite unique in some way or another. Personally I think your just a pretty straightforward type of a Crossdresser who knows how to have fun with it, and doesn't have any hang ups. If I were to put a label on myself I'd say bordering on the insane at times, but then I think thats quite an advantage in todays climes.
Take care
BEVxxxx

[MarinaTwelve200]

I would say you are both a fetishst (for female clothing) and a bit of a "Thrill seeker"---which is why you cross dress,--Remember CROSS DRESSING is what one DOES (for some reason or other) NOT what one IS.

You get a sexual Charge out of the cross dressing and an aditional "THRILL" out of the ocasional venture out RISKING "exposure and humiliation and other dire consequences" and getting away with it--yet another source of a RUSH

You ARE HERTO and not transsexual--(you dont feel like a woman in a mans body,)

Thats the way I see it anyway, from the info you gave me.

[Ms. Donna]

Hi Ranee,

So, I have to ask: what happened to putting this all behind you? You were pretty confident that you were able to do so and as I recall, you had a good reason. Although I can't say I surprised you're back (more like you never left.)

OK, let's see what we have:


1 - I dress to go out only, shopping, to concerts, movies and ballet, but never to clubs
But you do go out dressed... In that respect you are past the 'closet' and out in the real world as Ranee.

2 - My true identity is a secret.
Don't know what you mean by this. What is your 'true' identity?

3 - Heterosexual and fetishistic.
OK, I'll take this to mean that you are attracted to females and you get 'aroused' by dressing. Sounds like good, clean fun.

4 - No interest in 24/7 dressing.
No problem.

5 - No interest in transexxualism for myself.
Not something in which one 'has an interest'. I'll take this to mean that as a male, you identify as a 'man': you do not identify as 'a woman' or as having the 'wrong' body.


So, what does this make you? A guy who gets a kick out of dressing up now and then and going out. Sounds fine to me.

Are you looking for there to be more to it than that? ;)

Love & Stuff,
Donna

[Melissa A.]

You are an elephant. Um, no...that ain't right. You are a bowl of cream cheese. Darn. wrong again. You are a hollywood stunt man. Aaaargh! that can't be right! wait a minute, I think I'm getting warmer....

Sweetie, you are a crossdresser, of course!! But don't worry about what it's called, be you! (being "classified" can only get ya in trouble) And that's a wonderful thing.

Hugs

Melissa:happy:

[Dee 1062]

I don't know what you are but for me...I am Me...Dee

[tekla west]

I never 'classify' anyone else, nor do I allow others to do it for me - or to me.

My name is tekla, or if you know me Kat, or if that is not good enough, you will address me as Dr. West.

As John said:
"I am he as you are he as you are me and we are all together." Works for me.

So, if you put a gun to my head and told me I must, MUST choose a classification I would reluctantly choose "Human Being."

BTW

"Boy, you been a naughty girl you let your knickers down"

Hummmm? What did he mean by that?

[Ranee Daze]

My point is simply that we could communicate on this forum better if we had a common set of terms for what we do and don't do. That's all. So maybe I'll ask in a different way....

Hmmmmm

Define:

Drag as opposed to crossdressing.

Closet, closeted

Out

Transgendered

And any other term that may come to mind?

[NighttimeGirl]

its just about the individual though if you categorize then thats fine for you, you be whatever society wants to classifie you as, i myself am a little bit of guy with the main ingredient of girl who likes to dress and feel very girly one day and then sit scratchin my nads on the settee watchin the footy as kieran another day.

its easy if you wanna be tagged = a streaker = someone who runs around with no clothes on. I bet there was no such thing as a streaker before the first one was seen and the newspapers or someone else had already spoken up.

I aint nothing but me

[JMO2]

My point is simply that we could communicate on this forum better if we had a common set of terms for what we do and don't do. That's all. So maybe I'll ask in a different way....

Hmmmmm

Define:

Drag as opposed to crossdressing.

Closet, closeted

Out

Transgendered

And any other term that may come to mind?


You couldn't say it any better than I could. Definitions on this forum get all blurred and I just kind of skim over the words not understanding which word they are trying to elaborate on.
I find all those words kind of blurred in so many ways with no definite definiton except to say that Transgendered does refer to crossdressing as well as to someone having a sex-change.
Thank you for bringing up this topic......
JMO

[Tracy Lynn]

We are all different to a degree. I think you would have so many definitions that it wouldn't matter anyway. We are all unique.

[Charleen]

To paraphrase an old movie quote, " Labels? We don't need no stinkin' labels!" This whole way of life can be confusing enough for most without trying to figure out what small pidgeon hole to fit into. As Linda said quite well, I'm me. Love and xxxx, Lily

[Melissa A.]

Ok, dear, I'll try and give ya a quick glossary, nothing wrong with wanting to know.

A drag queen is usually a gay male who dresses(usually flamboyantly) as a woman for theatrical purposes or because it's fun or because it feels natural to him. (I guess some gay men must like drag queens, which kinda confuses me). He is not trying to "pass" or fool anyone-especially his peers.(ie.-other gay men)

A crossdresser is strictly defined as one who experiences sexual or emotional gratification from wearing the clothes of the opposite sex. I'm a crossdresser, and I define crossdressing as "being a female". The crossdresser standing next to me would probably say I'm full O' hooey. I'm afraid that you will find almost as many personal definitions as there are crossdressers. Sorry, hon.

Closet, closeted, No offense, sweetie, but if you need this defined, you DO need a glossary! C'mon, you are kidding, right? OK, maybe I'm being mean. I apologise. I told you I would do this. It means to keep something (being gay, being a crossdresser, liking red meat) a secret from the world at large. That means mostly everyone.

Out-I think you're having fun with me ranee, ya better not be! I have a reputation here! On the other hand, it could use some improving. See CLOSETED. Think OPPOSITE, k?

Transgendered- Now THIS is a legitimate one. As I understand it, it falls somewhere between crossdresser and transexual. Someone who lives much of the time as the opposits sex, in public and private, but who is not planning to have gender reassignment surgery.(a sex change). On the other hand, there are some who say we are ALL transgendered to some degree and that it's kinda an umbrella term.

I hope this helps, Ranee. If you want to know more, well I did my part. Your'e on a COMPUTER!!! THE KNOWLEDGE OF THE AGES IS AT YOUR FINGERTIPS! As someone with a baseball cap on once said, "You could look it up." Please do. I know ya can do it, sweetie!

Hugs,

Melissa:happy:

[SherryLynn GG]

Ya know im confused as to why anyone even needs a label...You are You & I am me...who cares what other people call you as long as you know who you are

With that being said, everyone is different therefore there would be no way to have a "certain" set of terms to use on this forum so everyone understands...because honestly even then im sure somebody would get confused somewhere....the way I see it, if you have a question about what somebody means, just ask :)

[jai.says]

brava, melissa. Great little glossary.

Ranee,

Although I resist labels now, I did find them useful as I was beginning to figure out where I "fit it." It's kind of like finding the phylum before you can name the species --- or finding your tribe before finding your blood family. In the end, no label will fit exactly --- and i thank the gods for that!

[Caitlintgsd]

Does it really matter? As long as you're comfortable and can accept yourself it's all good. Probably not a TS otherwise you'd be following a different path (and that path can be a real pain at times, trust me). I'll make an uneducated guess......*sticking my finger in the air to determine the wind direction*.....Crossdresser. But does anybody real care? About labels anyway?

[GINA-CD]

I can understand that people needs labels sometimes... there's a theory in philosophy that says that if you are able to name something, then you are able to understand it, to comprehend it... and maybe that's what you're looking forward, to understand your situation because it's apparently different from the average or "normal" behaviour.

Keep looking for answers, but don't expect everybody to follow your approach since not everyone has the same needs at the same time... I bet a lot of girls in here already passed that stage...

0.02

[joaniieann]

I would think of you as a crossdresser. What is the real questions is how do you define yourself?:happy:

[Khriss]

... are inadiquate in true description , allways ! (generaly) ...hehe
...when forced , I'd admitt the term "tranvestite" (MtF) may have negative conotations ..but may descibe me best,in those simple ,clinical terms some poeple require to feel comfortable,self justified ,or often ..superior ?
...there may be possitive reasons for labling each other in terms of understanding each other or awareness, ...while, outside that context, I often find such terms offensive .... like the way people use the "N" word in talking about a race of people or even parts of society that fall under preconcieved
notions ?? (or worse ,engrained belief ?) ohhh well ..just my -0.02 xx"K"

[Joy Carter]

Can't put a label on it Hun your'e who you belive you are nothing more.:hugs:

[Lisa Golightly]

My label? Hmmmmmmmm... Priceless :)

[older not wiser]

Hi Ranee, just reading all the responses to your post I have to go with Melissa on this one. I feel that she said it best and really straight forward also. Sometimes we all look for the truth but want it sugar coated as well, the truth when taken as said will set you free (or something like that). Self acceptance is difficult enough without the need to hang a damn label on it.

Love; BonnieAnne:GE:

[bgirl]

[QUOTE=Remember CROSS DRESSING is what one DOES (for some reason or other) NOT what one IS.

.[/QUOTE]

I would disagree. I think of this as part of Who I AM not just something I do.
I'm a little confused myself. It seems that there as many different kinds of crossdressers as there are crossdressers on this site. Who do you think you might be? Hi I'm Beth and I have a foot in two worlds.

[Phoebe Reece]

Some of you might want to look at this old thread: http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?t=16532&highlight=transvestite
My post there attempted to put a little humor into this question of classification.

[Casey Morgan]

The problem with defining many of the labels is that each person identifies as something or not largely on how they feel and how they perceive themselves. Which is why it's a bad idea, I'd even go so far as to call it rude, to label somebody for them. Invariably your definition of a label will include some who don't wish to be included and exclude some who feel they have a legitimate right to identify as such. (I'm not saying they don't have the right to identify as such. I'm saying that based upon the preponderance of their own personal evidence they identify as that label, and who are we to say they're wrong for doing so?)

Let's take transgendered as an example. I subscribe to the idea that transgendered encompasses all MTFs and FTMs since either our gender or our gender expression is not necessarily what society says is "normal" for males and females. We transgress society's accepted rules. But even using the umbrella definition there are those who do not see themselves as transgendered and do not want to be labelled as such.

Some of us also use transgendered as a narrower identity. But even there we do not use transgendered the same way. One member uses it instead of non-op transsexual since she does not see herself as a transsexual the way she understands transsexual to be. Fair enough. I use it in more of a "differently gendered" meaning since I've known for years that I'm not really a man and I'm not really a woman either. Fair enough. The question is, are you going to tell one of us that we're not really transgendered, that we're using it incorrectly? I'm sure in both cases the reply would run along the lines of "by your definition maybe". Which is a polite way of telling you where you can stick your definition.

I'm not even sure we all think "female side" has the same definition. I don't see myself as schizophrenic or anything but I know what it means when I use that term. And I get the sneaky suspicion that it means something a little different to some people here.

In a community where (I'm pretty sure anyway) we can see that the idea of one set of naughty bits equals man while another set of naughty bits equals woman is at best not always right, how can we think that label definitions are going to be black and white? Most dictionaries may define the word "generally" but use it in their definitions as little as possible. In this community it almost (generally? :D ) has to be a part of your vocabulary.

Ranee, I very recently started identifying as genderqueer after not doing so even though the definition everybody points to for it fits me perfectly (as I see it). My hesitation was mainly because I'm not a carbon copy of one person I know of who self-identifies as genderqueer so I've been (unfoundedly) afraid that person is going to say "you're not, you stupid freaking moron". Never mind that I posted how I feel shortly after joining this site and someone said that a number of peopole they know who feel like that identify as genderqueer. Never mind that the person who identifies as genderqueer would never call me a stupid freaking moron for identifying as genderqueer but would helpfully point out another identity I might consider if they thought it described me better from what I've posted. Never mind that people here understand that our perceptions of ourselves change and so what we identify as might change over time too, and they wouldn't think less of someone for saying "I used to call myself this but now that is a better description of me".

So call yourself what you understand yourself to be based on your understanding of that identity, and what you're comfortable calling yourself. Heck, I started out calling myself a crossdresser. And in terms of it being an action I still do. Then when I found out it didn't cover how I feel inside, I started with "human" and just kind of went from there. After years of self-loathing, human was actually a nice place to start.