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NewbieCD
08-05-2006, 02:31 PM
This is geting very personal and putting a lot of my self out there but it is a question i need awnsered. I will give you a little back story ever since i started this dressing I have started a diary to help me write what my feeling are. While writing in it one night about the diffrence of male and female qualities i realized that not only do i not like the male pesonality in me that i do not like the male personality in general. How many of you feel this way?

DanaJ
08-05-2006, 02:35 PM
Well, this may not be popular, but I like what makes me - me. That includes male and female traits and characteristics, without either one, I wouldn't be who I am today.

And not all males have the same characteristics and personalities, nor do females. That would really lead into stereotypes and generalizations....

Tina Dixon
08-05-2006, 02:36 PM
I don't, there's good and bad in both genders, guys can be ass holes and women can be bitch's, hell I even know some of these people that have gotten married and reproduced, now thats sad:(

Eileen
08-05-2006, 02:36 PM
Newbie I feel much the same way. Males in general are not much of an asset to society. My feelings are so feminine! Living p/t as a male is getting to be so painful!!

Eileen

Karren H
08-05-2006, 03:10 PM
Actually my love my male side and my female side. And they love each other. Not like that!! As brother and sister!!! Get your mind out gutter. Hehe

But each personal has its strengths and weaknesses. But together its the best of both genders!! :D

Love Karren

tekla west
08-05-2006, 03:21 PM
I like myself. There are no 'two sides' to it. Its all me. I can wrench and I can write. I like guns and garters. I rock and go to the opera. I'm comfortable in a LBD, a suit, in casual stuff and naked. I'm a great academic, and a very good stagehand too. Its not a matter of one or the other, its about the whole person.

Carlacd
08-05-2006, 03:27 PM
You have to like your self first. I think if you do that, then all the rest falls into place, male or female.

Jessica Brekke
08-05-2006, 05:13 PM
I the extent that I differentiate my 'guy' self from my 'girl' self (Note to both selves: start a thread on that... many, many thoughts), I'd have to say that I like large areas of my guy-ness. (Boy, that reads dirtier than I'd meant it too. Oh well, no way to go back and change it now :P).

Yes, I can be uncommunicative, closed off emotionally and angry at times, but I'm can also be very analytical, decisive, goal-oriented and protective of others... all traits that I'm very proud of.

I think the most important thing for to remember, is that it's important to work on strengthening and developing my best traits, no matter what 'gender category' they fall under, while minimizing my worst ones.

After all, isn't that what growth really is?

NighttimeGirl
08-05-2006, 07:25 PM
Ive got to be honest and say it depends what day it is,

I hate my male side most of the time especially when driving (road rage)

I love my femm side and I am totally a different person in that guise and the overwhelming abilty to be at ease with no worries.
I played the macho bull**** guy too long to to be able to like it!!!

I still like the abilty to make ppl laugh in male mode but that has always been a sort of deflector and an act to fit in?

Hey Newbie are you totally different when you aint dressed?

I know I am, but at the moment I am not dressed just got the drab attire on but when I am on here I automatically think different, its all getting academic now so I will leave it :idontknow:

:hugs:

:love:

Jennaie
08-05-2006, 10:01 PM
I see myself as one person, the male is complimented by the female. Someone once told me to listen and learn from Jennaie, that she will teach me a lot. I have learned that allowing Jennaie to be part of my personality has made me a better person.

So no, I do like my male self, but Jennaie has done much to make him a better person.

How does that song go? You'll always be a part of me? hmmm.. wonder what he was thinking?

KateW
08-05-2006, 10:24 PM
I can't really imagine myself with either my male or female characteristics taken away. Every one of them makes up who I am, and I am happy to have them.

Melanie R
08-05-2006, 10:31 PM
Well, this may not be popular, but I like what makes me - me. That includes male and female traits and characteristics, without either one, I wouldn't be who I am today.

And not all males have the same characteristics and personalities, nor do females. That would really lead into stereotypes and generalizations....

Dana, you have made a very valid point. All of us are masculine and feminine. Those who find a balance between their masculinity and femininity are the most successful as persons and in life. This applies to both men and women and to crossdressers and their wives. I have found that the women who are most successful in finding understanding and acceptance of their husband's crossdressing are those women who themselves have found a good balance between their femininity and masculinity as have their husbands.

Hugs,

Melanie

suchacutie
08-05-2006, 10:37 PM
Without a doubt both my masculine and feminine side have positive traits, but they both have some traits that I think need work.

That's why they make erasers, no?

Tina

Ardhanari
08-05-2006, 11:12 PM
People with strong egos, male or female, tend to bother me. People who are unable to see beyond the arbitrary rules of their early cultural conditioning bother me as well. When I say that they bother me, it's not that I'm intolerant of them, but rather they go out of their way to bother people different from themselves as we're apparently a threat to their egos and personal realities.

I could take this further and say that it's really my (and other's) primate nature that I don't like, but I doubt many here would be interested in discussing guerilla ontology.

And yes, the typical macho male who is too tough to cry, too afraid to admit to his doctor that he can't get it up, and has to bully feminine men in order to soothe his psychopathological compensatory narcissistic impairments, ad nauseum, makes me want to overthrow our male dominated society and bring back a matriarchical state simply for the influence it will have on the perceptions of the masses.

Our society needs to make the next step in evolutation and gain a sympathetic and respectful understanding of cultural relativism. A human culture that refuses to embrace individualism is little more than a somewhat-evolved hierarchy of chimps.

btw, I'm new here. Hi! I promise not to go off on many more rants.. :heehee:

noname
08-06-2006, 12:47 AM
I know for me, men generally over all are an embarrassment. I see them everyday with unkept hair, wrinkled clothes, dirty finger nails, and more. But, that is just the surface. Many of them seem pretty clueless in general. Everything from what's going on around, to how be behave. ( Please sir, don't pick your nose in the grocery store. ) While this is not all men, it seems to me a good portion of them are. Soooo embarrassing.

Jasmine Ellis
08-06-2006, 06:41 AM
You have to like your self first. I think if you do that, then all the rest falls into place, male or female.

I'm with Carla

Charleen
08-06-2006, 06:51 AM
There is good and bad in everybody. There are things about me I don't like and am always trying to correct them. I'm pretty much integrated and do not assign my faults to either Lily, or Charlie. I am the product of my life experiences. The thing for me is to learn from my mistakes to make a better person regardless of how I'm dressed. I've said it before, I have to get comfortable in my own skin or I will never know peace. Love and xxxx, Lily

NighttimeGirl
08-06-2006, 07:38 AM
I know for me, men generally over all are an embarrassment. I see them everyday with unkept hair, wrinkled clothes, dirty finger nails, and more. But, that is just the surface. Many of them seem pretty clueless in general. Everything from what's going on around, to how be behave. ( Please sir, don't pick your nose in the grocery store. ) While this is not all men, it seems to me a good portion of them are. Soooo embarrassing.

wow, I seen a few embaressing women in my time, more than i care to remember, particularly round were i grew up, it was enough to put you off crossdressing!!

:heehee:

on a whole we are all individual there are clean men and clean women and dirty men and dirty women, the way in which we are shaped has very little to do with how we turn out especially if you are strong minded, ok if your not it can affect you big time, but thats a whole new ball game.

It is about the individual not ppl on a general scale

Marla S
08-06-2006, 09:51 AM
While writing in it one night about the diffrence of male and female qualities i realized that not only do i not like the male pesonality in me that i do not like the male personality in general. How many of you feel this way?
In general I agree with you, knowing that a generalization most of the time isn't the best choice.
Thinking about sterotypical male traits there isn't much exciting to find, though there are some men that I salut ... but they are not suitable as a role model for me.

As I am a male and was rised as a male, one thing I like the most among being a TG is that my more male aspects learn from my more female ones and the other way round (most of my characteristics I can't assign to one side anyway). I see this as an experience and chance to become a more balanced individual that neither "real men" nor "real women" are able to get.

Casey Morgan
08-07-2006, 10:40 AM
I guess you'd have to define "male personality". I think the problem is too many people (men and women) believe they have to be caricatures. This goes beyond just being men and women. Quick: how writers, musicians, janitors, and computer programmers supposed to think, act, and dress? Odds are for each one you actually came up with a caricature. I don't know very many caricatures. I know a lot of people though.

Here's a thought for you: I'll bet that when the cameras were turned off, even Ward Cleaver (and I don't mean the actor) wasn't Ward Cleaver.

Lisa Golightly
08-07-2006, 10:52 AM
Errr... I'm just me really... I have Lisa traits :)

Scotty
08-07-2006, 10:58 AM
AS I said before, took me a long time but my male and female side are balanced....and that is the key to happiness, at least my own!!

JenniferPaul
08-07-2006, 03:15 PM
Here is an analogy to express my views
Think of three makeup shades groups blended into each other. Neutrals, reds and blues. Reds represent feminine traits, blues masculine traits. Neutrals are all those thiing that are neither male or female. The deeper colors are those determined by biology and genetics etc. The social cultural defined traits are represented by lighter shades. Our make up is made up of a blending together from all areas, A large part if not most is from the neutral area, this is blended into either the blue(male) or red(female) area, but with a few colors from the oppisite area. A lot of the blending is with the lighter shades and social and cultural defined traits which may shift according to trends, fads, or whatevers. The blending means there is no sharp contrast between the masculine and feminine areas of makeup or our personality.

Jennifer