PDA

View Full Version : talking to my little brother?



bi_weird
08-14-2006, 01:46 PM
Well I've been nosing about on the ftm side of this site for a while, enjoying all of that, but I have something applicable for this side of the wall also.
Back when I still lived at home (I'm three years into college now) occasionally some of my clothing went missing. Now I'm the only girl with three brothers, so it wasn't a sister borrowing my clothes. Eventually I figured out that it was my younger brother. Mostly I just ignored it, not really knowing what to do, and figured out when to go into his room to retrieve things I needed. The closest I ever came to confronting him was after I found a dress stretched out. I left a note on my dresses, without naming him, asking him to please stop wearing them because he was damaging them.
Of course, now I live away from home. I don't keep track of what I left at my parents place, so I have no idea if he's still borrowing my stuff. I honestly haven't even thought about it much since moving out, until I started poking around the mtf forum for kicks while avoiding work.
Should I try to approach him about it? Maybe by talking to him about my identity issues? He's kinda a moody kid, seeing as how he's seventeen and male and weeks away from college stuck at home with his parents, so talking to him about anything is already a challenge, but I wonder if I should say something. I know how great it is to have someone accept you, but I don't want to get in his space, especially if it was a phase or if he's gonna get mad at me or somethign like that.
I dunno. I guess I can continue the status quo, but I wonder if I could be a better big sister by talking to him about it. Any advice would be welcome.

Sharoncd
08-14-2006, 02:13 PM
Boy I wished that I had a sister that would share. When I was 17 I was still wondering what was happing to me. Why did I have these feelings? Was I doing everything right? Did I have my make-up on right?

My suggestion is when your alone and everything is going well between you and him, ask the question. Watch what you say and keep any negative tone out of you voice and out of your queston. You do not want to put him on the defensive. After the inital shock to your brother I believe that he will start asking question and maybe the two of you will even shop together. Would that be fun.

Janelle Young
08-14-2006, 02:15 PM
I would think that talking to him in a very gentle manner would be a good thing. You may want to start out by telling him about you first. Also that you are aware that there are a lot of M T F dressers out in the world. I say talk to him. Good luck and if you do talk to him please let us know how it went.

Teresa Amina
08-14-2006, 02:24 PM
Well, it seems you're FtM, right? Try confiding a little about that with him and see if he opens up about his own feelings. But a direct confrontation would be horrible. I was "borrowing" my elder sisters stuff at that age and it would have done me in to be challenged over it. Maybe you could get some stuff that fits him and leave it around like it's yours.

Jasmine Ellis
08-14-2006, 02:25 PM
I would think that talking to him in a very gentle manner would be a good thing. You may want to start out by telling him about you first. Also that you are aware that there are a lot of M T F dressers out in the world. I say talk to him. Good luck and if you do talk to him please let us know how it went.

couldn't of put it better

Karren H
08-14-2006, 02:42 PM
Yeah!! I'd approach him and see if he's willing to discuss it! But he may be too embarased to talk to you. I think we all would have love an accepting relative when we were younger.

And you could even offer to help him too...you have had way more practice than he has!! Maybe even crossdressing outing out together.. Could lead to a really neat brother - sister (or is that sister - brother?) Bond!! Hehe

Love Karren

Calliope
08-14-2006, 02:47 PM
Well, it seems you're FtM, right? Try confiding a little about that with him and see if he opens up about his own feelings. But a direct confrontation would be horrible. I was "borrowing" my elder sisters stuff at that age and it would have done me in to be challenged over it. Maybe you could get some stuff that fits him and leave it around like it's yours.

(Above) is the path I would take.

Or maybe a little note (without his name on it) - just saying, 'I'm here to talk if ya wanna.'

No further - 17 is a bizarre age.