we are not so different in love

[wilma]

My mascara is running, my lipstick is dull, my hose has a run in them. My ex is ruining my life. My love life is on the rocks, These words have been spoken by every type of person in the world. We are no different. Please tell me how we get through these times of grief without thoes we trust. For me I turn to my girl friends. Yes you! Please give me words of incouragement to make it through the tough times. I am battered in sole and in need of incouragement to make it through a lenghty divorce. I've been lacking in love and support and asking the question, How do we get through the tough times of love when things don't work out with the one you thought you would spend the rest of your life with? I may wear a skirt on the weekends but I Still need a shoulder to cry on. The wine bottle is getting emptied. LOL wilma

[Tristen Cox]

*hug* Wilma, here's a shoulder, you can cry all you want. Your friends are here for you. We always will be ;)

Love
Tristen

[wilma]

Thanks for the support

[Sharon]

Wilma,
All you can do is give yourself the time necessary to find your next path.

[wilma]

I can only hope my next path is truthful to myself and the one I connect with. Good Advise Sharon.

[Sharon]

I apologize for the quick reply to you Wilma. Too much time on the IM tonight.
I just mean to say that you need time to grieve. There's no set amount of time that it's going to last, but just be sure you don't close off all attempts by others to reach out to you.
I grieved over a death for about two years before I felt ready to move on. Many others do it much quicker. And many never let themselves get over it.
What you're feeling must be similar to grieving over a death -- the finality of it all I mean.
Just take care, and don't let yourself depend on the wine too much. Been there, doesn't help.
Love,
Sharon

[Fallen Angel]

Hi wilma, ive been in the same boat,first your hurt, then you will become angry and then you will develope a o-well attitude,and I know that every bodys worlds are different and every bodys addvice is different too! take on step at a time you have to crawl before you can walk. as a wise old china man said there nothing wrong with looking back as long as you dont live there. make peace with your self pick up the pieces and go on theres a reason for every thing and know body knows what lies in the future but the new year is upon us and it will be better it always is we learn by our mistakes we will loose freinds and gain new ones and you'l always have support by us all so call upon us at anytime we will always be here and our hearts and ears will be open

[DonnaT]

I know this is a difficult and painful time, and I wish you all the compassion and support you deserve.

[wilma]

all advise given in love is good advise. I take your advise to heart. LOL Wilma, Sharon,Im comming down from the wine, thanks.

[Nikki A.]

It's tough and it does hurt, I know been there. Thankfully you've found this site where you always have friends who understand and will listen, I wish this was available for me when I went through my divorce. Alcohol really is not the answer in that it brings you down more and clouds your judgement. Please, when it seems that the walls are falling all around you give us a shout. I'm sure there will always be someone to listen.

[Sweet Susan]

It's actually not true. We don't get through anything. We just drift into the next day, and then we start all over again. The best we can do is suck it up and go on. You know, "suck it up! Be a man." Yepper Depper, and his dog spot!

[AnnaMaria]

Wilma,

I know how you must be feeling I went throught the same thing in "01. Left my first wife in 2000 and and filed for divorce in "01 and had to fight for an entire year before I finally got the papers that said that it was over. And while I was the one that left and the one that filed, it still hurt because I felt like my life was ending. But through it all I kept hearing the voice of my maternal grandmother saying to me that God has a plan for all of us and that even though we don't know what it is doesn't mean that it's not there. Nor does it mean that he is not there for us.
I have always tried to live my life with the notion that even though our destiny is not set God already knows how things are going to turn out and it's up to us to simply live the life that we are given to the best of our ability and always be looking forward. Thats not to say that we shouldn't remember the past because that is how we learn but we should us the past to our advantage and try not to let the same thing happen again.

My heart goes out to you in this time of need and I hope that in the coming life you will be better for what has happened. Just remember that we are always here for you anytime you need to talk or just a shoulder to cry on.

huggs and prayers
anna