New Book: Life. Ch. 3

[Stephanie Brooks]

Went to the counselor today and see some resolutions ahead. They are in some ways grim, but they're also positive. I'll hang loose through the holidays and complete things in the new year. This is an issue of whether my marriage can be salvaged or not. If so, great! If not, then we break apart, live close in order to raise our daughter, and work the finances so that neither of us is screwed in the long run.

Today I saw a view of the end of The Purge. I don't know when it will end, but it's the first time in over three months. It began September 12.

It's funny. My counselor asked if I'd ever danced - and he meant real dancing. My response was no. He suggested doing it. He said I was very fluid, and have the ability to become very tense. I'd never thought of doing it. Perhaps I should.

In any case, I'm worn out from today's session. The blood flow is such that my hands are chilled - stress, definitely. Yet, for all of the grief, there is hope.

[Amelie]

Your counseler is right, dancing is very soothing. When I go to the clubs, I get on the dance floor and dance until my make-up starts to run.

I am glad things look like are getting better for you, even though you are still streesed after seeing your counsler. At the best, you are talking to someone, this counts for something, you are trying.
Hope the future gets less stressful for you.
Love Amelie

[Tristen Cox]

Went to the counselor today and see some resolutions ahead. They are in some ways grim, but they're also positive. I'll hang loose through the holidays and complete things in the new year. This is an issue of whether my marriage can be salvaged or not. If so, great! If not, then we break apart, live close in order to raise our daughter, and work the finances so that neither of us is screwed in the long run.

Today I saw a view of the end of The Purge. I don't know when it will end, but it's the first time in over three months. It began September 12.

It's funny. My counselor asked if I'd ever danced - and he meant real dancing. My response was no. He suggested doing it. He said I was very fluid, and have the ability to become very tense. I'd never thought of doing it. Perhaps I should.

In any case, I'm worn out from today's session. The blood flow is such that my hands are chilled - stress, definitely. Yet, for all of the grief, there is hope.

You're doing fine. I can't think of any better way to handle that situation. Warm those hands up and DANCE! I'm sure you'll love it, let's out alot of physical anxieties ;) Best wishes and good luck for the future.

Love
Tristen

[Stephanie Brooks]

Thanks Amelie and Tristen!!!!!!!

Actually, the dancing to which he refered was ballet and jazz. I don't know that I'll do it, but who knows? Makes me want to see the movie "Billy Elliot" again. If you haven't seen it, I recommend it. (If I do try dance, I'll need to start a poll to see if anyone can guess how many muscles I can pull in the first month!)

On stress, the stress comes from arriving at a decision point, the "final chance" for this marriage. Point is, it doesn't look good. Staying together looks worse for all of us. We'll solve it.

Thank you for being here! The people in this forum are great. :D

[Sharon]

So happy to see a bit more optimism Steph! In lieu of dancing, you could always throw in a little yoga -- very soothing and therepeutic.
Keep up with the positive thinking -- knowing that you are doing everything you can to set things right and preparing for the future, no matter how things end up working out.
Love,
Sharon

[DonnaT]

Try ballroom dancing, and take your wife!

Hope things really work out for you.

[Wendy me]

stephanie gald to here that went well yes to dance.......out in the clubs or alone to let lose just be free sounds like fun .
things i have been told by my thearepest
quit you job (i use to have to be in controll all the time)

laugh out loud

cry

be angery (know why)

be happy (know why)

be forgiveing

be open

just let things be

some time thay don't realy make seance but one step at a time thay all come to gether

sister you are a good and worth wile person
may you be safe , happy and well

so go girl crank up the tunes and dance.........

[Stephanie Brooks]

Thanks Sharon, Donna, and Wendy!!!!

[KewTnCurvy GG]

Hang in there grrly:) Big warm hugs and prayers and wishes for the best; you deserve it! And I was especially touched by what you wrote in the Ying/Yang thread I did: wow!

hugs
kew

[Stephanie Brooks]

Hang in there grrly:) Big warm hugs and prayers and wishes for the best; you deserve it! And I was especially touched by what you wrote in the Ying/Yang thread I did: wow!

hugs
kew
Thank you Kew! *HUGGLES*

[Ashleigh]

Steph, make sure you keep as much optimism as you can. If something can go your way, you will see the opportunity only if you know there is some sort of hope. Dr. Wayne Dyer wrote a book entitled "You'll See It When You Believe It" and it does work. I know you are hurting and we are here for you. Please keep trying to save the marriage if possible. It is worth it.

I also agree with DonnaT. Take your wife ballroom dancing. You'll be surprised.

Keep the faith.

By the way, this has nothing to do with this thread, but did you ever "prove" to your students that 1 did not equal 1??

[Stephanie Brooks]

Hi Ashley!!!!

Thanks! I am still trying to save the marriage.

On 1 not being equal to 1, I don't have students; I'm actually working as an engineer. I've seen proofs of the sort you described with their inherent flaws, and designed for fun!

[Christiane]

Your counseler is right, dancing is very soothing. When I go to the clubs, I get on the dance floor and dance until my make-up starts to run.

I am glad things look like are getting better for you, even though you are still streesed after seeing your counsler. At the best, you are talking to someone, this counts for something, you are trying.
Hope the future gets less stressful for you.
Love Amelie

Amelie,

I love your new avatar.

Love,
Christiane

[Jerry]

I'm so sorry for what you are going through. Trying to take stock of where you are and where you want to be is very difficult. Our particular "place" makes it more difficult sometimes. It sounds like stopping the crossdressing is the only solution that will maintain your marriage. I'm lucky not to be there yet, but the possiblities are closer that I'd like to imagine.

Who you are is not at question. You are valued. You are important. You are worthy.

But if you must give up some behavior, no matter how difficult, it must be done for your kids.

I'll pray for you. Do what you must. What is right. In the end it will all be worth it.

(Where do I get these platitudes?)

Be well. Be positive. Hugs. Jerry

[Stephanie Brooks]

Thanks Jerry!

I'm certainly considering all of my options, and am grateful for all of the support from everyone.

*HUGS*

[racquel]

Stephanie wish i had something insightfull to say,i don't.i wish you well.you say your hands are cold?isn't that a feminine trait.i hope you can be what makes you happy.huggs

[Stephanie Brooks]

Raquel,

Well wishes are as strong a medicine as insight. Thank you!

*HUGS*

[Rachel Ann]

Stephanie

As we are going through similar things, we should stay in touch as warriors in the same trench! PM me anytime!

I am sorry that I haven't got anything together yet about your post to Kew's thread. It is an absolute treasure. As we are a nation, it is a National Treasure!

Love

Rachel Ann

[Stephanie Brooks]

Stephanie

As we are going through similar things, we should stay in touch as warriors in the same trench! PM me anytime!

I am sorry that I haven't got anything together yet about your post to Kew's thread. It is an absolute treasure. As we are a nation, it is a National Treasure!

Love

Rachel Ann
Thank you Rachel Ann!

Feel free to pm me any time too! The coming months promise to be a challenge for both of us. May the New Year end better than it portends to start. :)

*HUGS*

[Wendy me]

sister stephanie glade to here your still working at the marriage takes work rember with her or by your slefe dance sister loose and silly hard to be tenced up while danceing it frees the mind

stick with it
huge hugs

[Stephanie Brooks]

sister stephanie glade to here your still working at the marriage takes work rember with her or by your slefe dance sister loose and silly hard to be tenced up while danceing it frees the mind

stick with it
huge hugs
Hi Wendy!!!!!

Thanks Lady!!!!!! *HUGS* There's much more life to be lived. We'll get through it.