What should I do, I've got 30mins to decide

[KellyT]

At the moment I am dressed in brown tights and boots and a long maroon skirt, with a black fluffy v neck jumper on top. I got the skirt from my wife the other day, I spotted it in a box of stuff she was gonna give to a charity shop. I spent the morning dying to ask if I could have it. When I did she said "yes, I'm glad you spotted that, I like it too and it seems a shame to give it away, although I never wear it now". My wife is accepting of me wearing items of womens clothing, but she has never seen me wearing all this stuff togother. She is supportive and loving and I am very keen to not overload her with my crossdressing. My dilemma is, my wife is at yoga and gets back in half an hour. Do I stay dressed and probably give her a big shock, or do I get back into my jeans and trainers and go back to the "easy does it approach" and thank myself that she is so accepting already. My heart tells me to stay dressed but I'm nervous as hell. She won't get angry, but I don't want to ruin all the good PR I've built up re my cross dressing over the last few months

I'd welcome any comments/ suggestions

[tekla west]

Talk to her first, let her decide if and when.

[Ellie]

Can you call/IM/Text her and let her know that Kelly is feeling like comming over?

This should give her enough warning to not hurt the trust you have built up so far.

If she has never seen you dressed then it might be too much of a shock.

:2c:

[KellyT]

Can you call/IM/Text her and let her know that Kelly is feeling like comming over?

This should give her enough warning to not hurt the trust you have built up so far.

If she has never seen you dressed then it might be too much of a shock.

:2c:

I've thought of sending her a text. I just don't know if i'm brave enough. I wish I was more confident in myself.

[Jean GG]

I would NOT jeopardize a relationship that seems to work...talk to her first...otherwise she could end up doing a 360 degree on you...:) jean

[BethCD]

Kelly, I realize that I'm probably past your deadline.....but I vote for "ask her first" how she feels about it. She is already accepting, don't burn that bridge.
Hope it went well. Please keep us posted.

Beth:D :hugs:

[dazzed]

Ask first she may be stressed out over somthing else,and not in the mood

[Bev06 GG]

I've thought of sending her a text. I just don't know if i'm brave enough. I wish I was more confident in myself.

Well its not as brave as staying dressed and finding out the hard way what your both made of. Just text her and ask her if she minds if you stay dressed and see what she says. It would be abit of a shock if she just turned up and found you in all your glory, specially if she fetches a friend home with her.
Take care
BEVxxxx

[KellyT]

Thanks everyone,
I did text her first and she replied with " Go ahead". When she came in I had changed anyway as I chickened out and she asked why I wasn't dressed . I went and got my skirt on again and she said she was fine with it, although she felt the style didn't suit me. All that worry for nothing. I still feel very strange and self concious though, but very very happy.

Thanks

[Shelly67]

This is a subject very close to home for me .....Last weekend I told my partner of my dressing .....thank god she took it all so well .She said , she,d known for years , but because i never confided in her , she found it to my personel choice to keep it private . To break the ice , I asked her if she minded meeting Michelle ( me ), in the situation of me cleaning the house dressed - it was all I could think of at the time . She agreed . So last friday , I wore a maids outfit , tons of make up and prepared to meet her at home , after work . My god , was I nervous.??!! After a few stiff drinks , my nerves calmed till i heard the front door open ..."well this is it " i thought and emerged to confront my biggest fear ....a possible bout of scorn and laughter . It didnt happen . Bless her she looked me up and down smiled , told me i was attractive .I was the ordered to NEVER leave the house in dress without her , and to stay away from strange men ..!! Three times she asked was it her husband beneath the gloss and shadow , and kept staring at me ..i made the mistake then of having a few more drinks to break the ice .... my cleaning / maid duties went from bad to worse , and was threatened with the sack .!!

If anyone is about to do the same , as in showing yourself for the first time , do yourself a big , big favour ...try to arrange something with both parties knowing what will commence . And give her plenty of notice ....for one i wouldnt advise letting her catch you .....be brave , be open and honest , because in the end of things honesty is our only excuse .


Oh and - leave the booze in the bottle ....lol....
kind regards Michelle..xx

[Melissa A.]

So ya both accomodated the other, a bit. Awwww, that's just so sweet! I see a future for you two kids!

Hugs,

Melissa:happy:

[KateW]

I agree with the others, definately give her the choice of seeing you dressed, as opposed to just springing it on her. I think it'll work out better in the long run.

[Wendy me]

ok it's like almost 4 hours from when you started this thread ..... sooooooo what did you do???? what did she do???? well just don't leve us hanging.....

[Wenda]

I would NOT jeopardize a relationship that seems to work...talk to her first...otherwise she could end up doing a 360 degree on you...:) jean
360 gets you back to the same direction you started with. Would that be 180?


Sounds like it well, up until the surplus whiskey..... so, how did it turn out?

[Dee 1062]

30 min. is up...so what happen?

[Jacqueline]

would love to know what happened also

[KellyT]

Thanks everyone,
I did text her first and she replied with " Go ahead". When she came in I had changed anyway as I chickened out and she asked why I wasn't dressed . I went and got my skirt on again and she said she was fine with it, although she felt the style didn't suit me. All that worry for nothing. I still feel very strange and self concious though, but very very happy.

Thanks

Further to my last post above where she said she was fine with it but the style didn't suit me... I was standing washing the dishes, loving the way I felt and the feel of the long skirt against my legs. My wife came up behind me, putting her hand on my shoulder and said "I know this means a lot to you but I just don't like you wearing that skirt with everything else. It makes you look too feminine. My heart sank. Despite being grateful she was being honest in a nice way, I felt that the courage I had built up (what little of it there was) had been whipped away. I just said "okay, i'll go and get changed". She said she preferred me in a sarong style dress she had given me and I could put this on if I wanted. She felt this wasn't too feminine. I, probably stupidly, said no it's okay, and went and changed into my jeans and trainers. I know I should be so happy that my wife is so accepting and grateful because I am very aware of how lucky I am, but I still can't help feeling really down about this

X

[Lisa Golightly]

I just said "okay, i'll go and get changed". She said she preferred me in a sarong style dress she had given me and I could put this on if I wanted. She felt this wasn't too feminine. I, probably stupidly, said no it's okay, and went and changed into my jeans and trainers. I know I should be so happy that my wife is so accepting and grateful because I am very aware of how lucky I am, but I still can't help feeling really down about this

To be honest, I would have felt the same.

[gerdaberlin]

AS I am not nearly so courageous in opening myself to my wife (asian), I would just advise you to TAKE TIME! Things develop more smooothly over time, a little piece of dress here, a little trace there..
KellyT, keep it up and dont overrun your partner..

[KellyT]

The following photos are of the blue sarong, which I really like and my wife is happy for me to wear, and the maroon skirt which she said is too feminine. Apologies for the quality as they were hastily taken and I don't have my face included as I've stubble and no makeup and it's not a pretty site. I'm also wearing brown fur trimmed knee length boots with the maroon skirt

[KellyT]

Thanks for all your advice and help, and I think slowly does it is the best way forward. x

[Charleen]

The following photos are of the blue sarong, which I really like and my wife is happy for me to wear, and the maroon skirt which she said is too feminine. Apologies for the quality as they were hastily taken and I don't have my face included as I've stubble and no makeup and it's not a pretty site. I'm also wearing brown fur trimmed knee length boots with the maroon skirt

Oh, and those tops, along with what they're covering,(very nice BTW) are not too femme? I know some GGs that would kill for a chest like that! Love all the outfits. I agree with the other girls, give her time. It's like getting into a hot bath, slow and steady, than enjoy:happy: . Too fast, and it ain't no fun:eek: . Love and xxxx, Lily

[Jasmine Ellis]

She Gave You Some Of Her Clothes, So I Would Sit With Her And Have A Nice Chat. With A Bottle Of Wine

[Shelly67]

Strange is,nt it .....coming clean and telling youre loved one the truth? Mine says she understands , but just cant get her head round it all totally ...this too has left me feeling somewhat confused and a little down . But , it certainly has me feeling free and totally at ease with myself , as I felt not telling her was untruthful and deceptive . This weekend I,m gonna try to make things even more easier ...a meal , a movie ( at home ) and hopefully a girlie cuddle on the couch .....

As for anyone else reading this about to confront his partner with the truth , I,ll wager they are probably aware of something going on ...speshly if you wear make up...mine did . And the fib i used .." dust in my eyes from work " certainly did,nt persuade here for the reason of dark eyelashes instead of blond !!
i spoke to a cd friend online about this subject ...she told me she,d read of wifes / partners not fully accepting their husbands dress due to the fact of being prettier than themselves .....make you wonder does,nt it ....?

[KellyT]

OMG! Is that purple skirt silk by any chance? I believe I have that one - and it's my absolute favorite!


Yeah it is silk and reversible with a black and white flower print on the other side

[Bev06 GG]

Awww Kelly,
I know it could have been worse and I think your wife is very supportive, but I couldn't help but sense your disappointment. Im so sorry, but atleast youve got something very positive to build on. Have a Big HUGG from me.
BTW youve got a really nice bottom I think you'de really suite something tighter and more tailored but please dont tell your wife I said that, I dont want to cause her any offence.
Take care
BEVxxxxx

[KellyT]

Strange is,nt it .....coming clean and telling youre loved one the truth? Mine says she understands , but just cant get her head round it all totally ...this too has left me feeling somewhat confused and a little down . But , it certainly has me feeling free and totally at ease with myself , as I felt not telling her was untruthful and deceptive . .

That is also why I told my wife. I love her to bits and didn't want to lie to her. Since telling her it has been a huge weight of my shoulders. I think the 45kilos or so that still sits there is a lot of my own personal hang ups about my crossdressing.

As I said before, I feel very lucky to be in this position, but can't help feeling a bit down about it. I was thinking about it today and it crossed my mind that what bothered me was her saying the purple skirt looked too feminine, when this is exactly what I want. I think it is hard to see how she will progress from that to being more accepting. Maybe she never will be and i'll just have to deal with that, but then again, this time last year I never thought she'd be giving me some of her clothes and giving me tips on leg hair removal. x

[KellyT]

Awww Kelly,
Have a Big HUGG from me.
BTW youve got a really nice bottom I think you'de really suite something tighter and more tailored but please dont tell your wife I said that, I dont want to cause her any offence.
Take care
BEVxxxxx

Thanks. The bottom is probably due to cycling about 200miles aweek and thanks for the clothes tip.

PS. I might be really dim here but what does BTW mean. I know it's gonna be something really obvious, but if you don't know, then you don't know

[Shelly Preston]

BTW

By The Way

[KellyT]

I knew it'd be something really obvious :happy:

[Dee 1062]

Hey your wife is giving half way, why don't you give half, It's a 50/50 marriage...she has already given, by being ok with her hubby wearing womens cloths...so what's the big deal over a dress, besides from what I see you need to cut them in half and go with a shorter style:)

[KellyT]

Hey your wife is giving half way, why don't you give half, It's a 50/50 marriage...she has already given, by being ok with her hubby wearing womens cloths...so what's the big deal over a dress, besides from what I see you need to cut them in half and go with a shorter style:)


You've obviously missed my point.

Regard to the length. I like my skrts long... Each to their own, it'd be so boring if we were all the same

[vickinetmoor]

Discard everything, but leave the skirt on. She may be expecting that and then she will do the rest. (experience!!)

[Lotte L]

Just say to her "will I show the dress to see its ok and suits me"

Love,
Lotte

[Lisa B Au]

I think from my experience I would take things very slowly and let her set the boundries. I made the big mistake of going too fast and blew it all. I have now started again but under my SO's boundries

[KellyT]

Just say to her "will I show the dress to see its ok and suits me"

Love,
Lotte

Cheers. That's really the tact that i'm using, and I do value her opinion on what looks good, so if she says it doesn't suit me, and she's the one who's got to look at me the most, then i've got to respect her point. Slowly is the best option. I think, at the time, i'd got so excited and then the "doesn't suit me" comment brought me back down to earth. On reflection, it was a totally fair comment and I over reacted by being down about it. She only said it cos she loves me, and I love her for that.

Thanks for all your comments and advice.