Something more (or less?) than dressing

[Cristi]

I've noticed that though I consider myself a fairly masculine guy (when not in a skirt!) I seem to have some kind of connection to women socially that most other men don't have.

I often wonder if this is cause of effect. Do I get along with women better because I am a crossdresser, or is my crossdressing a manifestation of some part of my personality that is also responsible for me getting along with women?

Tonight is an example. I was at work chatting with a few of the women I work with and one of them suggested that we go out for a bite to eat after work. Of all the men in the office (it is about 50/50), I was the only man invited along with several women.

We had a great time eating, chatting, gossiping about others at work. It wasn't until I got home that I realized that I had had a 'girls night out'. I was mentally 'crossdressed' even though I was in guy mode. :)

So what is it in my personality that makes me fit in like that? I know many women like gay guys becuase the don't feel threatening, but I'm not gay. I don't know what was/is going on, but I find it interresting...

Has anybody else felt the same way?

[Lisa B Au]

Yes I have found that I am the same. I find it easier talking with gilrs than males.

As to being metally crossdressed, I usually am wearing something nice underneath my very male clothes, but thats just me:)

[sparks]

I've always been a chick magnet! For conversations only:( Alas what can we do? I just don't get alot of male interests. I find it easier to fit into the womens conversations!

[ranma 1/2]

I prefer the company of women. I feel like I connect with them more then guys.

Ive noticed lately that some of the gals at work must see my fem side and they confide in me on subject that are off limits between men and women such as one gal told me her age. Another gal on the full figured side, even told me her weight. I didnt even have to coax the info out of them. They just came out and told me.

[Lisa Golightly]

Hmmmmm... For me they seem to fall into four categories...

1. 'Hold me' types... These see no wrong in me.
2. 'Yer such a bitch Lisa!' types... These like my cutting barbs.
3. Hate you! Hate you! types... The confidence threatened.
4. 'FREAK!' types... Am I bothered?

[sandra-leigh]

I seem to have some kind of connection to women socially that most other men don't have.

I often wonder if this is cause of effect. Do I get along with women better because I am a crossdresser, or is my crossdressing a manifestation of some part of my personality that is also responsible for me getting along with women?

I generally get along better with women. I never figured out what to say to the guys, as I have little interest in sports or cars or getting drunk, and I'm not into crude sexual remarks; and I know very little about children. Sure I can talk about computers, but I do quite enough of that already.

I'm better at developing connections with women. I'm not into knitting or celebrity gossip or most other stereotypical feminine occupations, but somehow I find things... I'm more attuned to noticing cues from women about topics they'd be willing to talk about. But I suspect I'm pretty far away from a Girls Night Out: I'm much better in very small groups.

Is this all due to some inner femininity? It doesn't feel like that to me; to me it seems more an outgrowth of the traditional socialization that guys don't talk to other guys about "soft" topics unless they know the other person fairly well.

[Marla S]

I often wonder if this is cause of effect. Do I get along with women better because I am a crossdresser, or is my crossdressing a manifestation of some part of my personality that is also responsible for me getting along with women?

My experiences tell me that it works both ways.
The personal dressing style always is a manifestation of part of the personality and the cultural, social affiliation. This is not exclusive to CDs.Times when the function of clothes has been solely to protect from coldness and rain are long ago.
The actual dressing accent this part of your personality, but it is still there even if you are not dressed fem.

On the other side are your personality, experiences, and way of thinking influenced by your dressing style.
This ranges from simple fashion questions to the annoyance or even fear of being molested.
As a non CDing man you can try as hard as you want you never will see "women's questions" more than in a rational way. Only if your lipstick once melted in your pocket you will feel the need for a purse, only if you go out dressed you will feel that you have become vulnerable.
These might not be the exact same feelings of GGs, but you come closer to it and to better understanding this way as a non CDing man ever will be able to.

Would be a wonder if this wouldn't be realized (better felt) by your coworkers even if you are not dressed

[Sally24]

I've always gotten along better with girls since I was a child. I think your style of thinking shows thru in your behavior and especially in your conversation. Since we carry many feminine characteristics around with us all the time, it shows thru to some extent. There is also something to the thought of us distancing ourselves from the masculine world. Accept it as a compliment or affirmation of you!

Sally

[Melanie R]

[QUOTE=Cristi;540030]I've noticed that though I consider myself a fairly masculine guy (when not in a skirt!) I seem to have some kind of connection to women socially that most other men don't have.

I often wonder if this is cause of effect. Do I get along with women better because I am a crossdresser, or is my crossdressing a manifestation of some part of my personality that is also responsible for me getting along with women?

In my professional career I was told many times that I was a different boss than most men. Yesterday I received an email from a woman who was my administrative assistant for 12 years. SHe had seen the show on WE and now knew about Melanie. Her response was "Now I know why I enjoyed working with you all those years. You were easy to talk to because of your femininity. I wish I would have known about Melanie sooner. I am happy that you are now free to be yourself". I have invited her for dinner to meet Melanie for the first time.

Hugs,

Melanie

[FROCKYHORROR]

I'm a little different here, i've always been excrutiatingly shy around girls,and doing this has only made it worse because of the shame i used to feel,i used to think people could read your mind, women expecially, i could be talking to them and think "God does she know,does she think i'm strange,shes gorgeous she deserve a pervy scum bag like me talking to her"....thats how my thinking was during the guilt/shame purge years, but since spending time here all that has started to change.

[NatalieH]

Of all the men in the office (it is about 50/50), I was the only man invited along with several women.

We had a great time eating, chatting, gossiping about others at work. It wasn't until I got home that I realized that I had had a 'girls night out'. I was mentally 'crossdressed' even though I was in guy mode. :)


Hi, Cristi,

Funny, I was discussing this with my wife the other day, the different styles of conversation between men and women. Very often in a bar/restaurant I'll notice a guy and a girl together, with the guy either going on about himself or explaining to the little woman how something works, showing off his expertise. Women seem to have a much more collaborative style of conversation, with more sharing of ideas, and one topic sliding into another. When I started saying this to my wife she just smiled and nodded. I realized later she was either thinking how right I was, or how forcefully I was explaining my theory to the little woman! And of course, like all generalizations....well, you know...

Natalie

[Karren H]

I actually get along with everyone, male or female, pretty much the same. Love to go out with the guys and go play some pickup hockey or hang around the coffee machine and talk with the girls!! Guess everyone has different personalities, femish, maleish or a blend..

Love Karren

[Jasmine Ellis]

I'm to shy, don't know what to talk about. people got to talk to me before I even open my mouth up let alone talk. Male or Female

[avawho]

My whole life I seem to get along best with most girls and women way more so and better than many of the guys... Sooo, yeah, I often have that type of experience. There were also times working in large offices or departments that were devoid of women, in which some of the guys would actually tease me as being the "token" gal...

I always had the last laugh and the most fun however :love:

Cheers
Ava

[fionasboots]

I too have always got along better with girls than guys and certainly I don't have any of the typical male interests such as football etc.

Generally in social situations (particularly once I get warmed up) I'm usually quite daft and totally none-threatening and usually enjoy getting everyone laughing, though I certainly don't claim to be any sort of party monster or anything.

So I'm not sure whether my ability to chat/gossip with the girlies is anything related to CDing/femme side or simply that I am just a fairly harmless and non-threatening person.

Anyway, I don't care ... I just love the attention :heehee:

... in fact would probably love it if I could go out with the girlies with me all dressed up as well :heehee: