The WHY ?

[Marla S]

The WHY-question obviously is a very fundamental question concerning CDing. We spend a lot of time to find an answer.
But the answer "Because it is a part of your personality" seems not to be very satisfying and the search goes on.

Instead pseudo-scientific gender tests, roumors that it could be due to a close relation to the mother, weakly significant statistics being the xth male child, hypotheses about some hormone splash in the womb etc., digit ratios with a very broad overlap for the genders, and the like seem to be more "believable", though non is even close to be proven.

What would be the difference or consequence if you would know for sure why you crossdress, and why is "part of your personality" not enough?
What would change ?

[Jenna1561]

"Part of my personality" may be enough for me. I do not sit around researching why I am who I am. I am Me.

It doesn't matter to me if it was a hormone wash in utero, learned behaviour, genetic predisposition, 1st child syndrome, or whatever. If I never know, that's O.K. with me.


Jenna

[brina_cd]

I'm wondering if for some people it's a form of escape from the stresses of their male existence. It can be so relaxing to "put on" a female alterego and temporarily forget the stresses of being husband, father, primary breadwinner, etc. I'm thinking this because My desire to dress waxes and wanes with my stress levels.

[Amelie]

Why???

Because I am insane.

[Lisa Golightly]

I don't do the why thing... It's not of any interest to me.

Why do I like sprouts but loathe cabbage? Hmmmmmmm....

[Shelly Preston]

Why I do it- because I enjoy it

Why did I start - curiosity

[tekla west]

"Why" is of no interest anymore, wasted time thinking about it once, got nowhere, because there is no answer to that. "HOW" is a much better course of thought.

[Marla S]

Thanks Ladies for your replys so far.

Don't get me wrong, I don't want to know why you crossdress (though I admit insanity is a striking reason ;)), but what has changed since you know or what do you expect to change if you would know.

EDIT: For myself I am going with Lisa and Tekla. If there is a relevant question it's the HOW. But as one often reads "If I only would know why (or similar) .... I am interested in the what-if part.

[DonnaT]

Why???

Because I am insane.

I can see it in your eyes. Hi Amelie. :)

Why? I already know why, but the answer isn't as important to me for me as it is for me to explain it to my wife.

Born this way, and can't change it.

[Raychel]

I tried it and became addicted. I don't smoke, no drugs, no other real bad vices. So if this is the worst thing that I am addicted to. I guess I am doing pretty good. Not hurting myself or anyone else for that matter. So all is Good.

[karentvca]

Today, I just prefer the way I look as a female. Don't like the male look... it doesn't suit me.

And that's how it started... I remember being jealous of the girls in my grade 3 class because they looked pretty every day. And they always seemed to be treated better than the boys. Everyone was so gentle with them. I liked that. I wanted to be treated like that.

I hated it when people expected me to "be a man" about everything. Sometimes, I just wanted to cry when I was upset. I am still that way today.

It's frustrating.

[chantelle]

The why of the question is not that which drives us, but the need to be ourselves and not feel guilty about what we do in our lives. Let me be the one to tell everyone that they have more to gain by just being themselve than walk around hating not being who they are. Besides it is a closed question that WHY. It should be how do we feel about it.

Love all
chantelle

[Dana Carlton]

Because we got the wrong chromosome. That's Y!!!!:heehee:

[Sandygal]

Shelly.....I couldn't say it any better, because we like it!.....Sandy

[Karren H]

Don't really know why and really don't care either. By knowing why could I stop or change? Don't think so but then I'll never know!!


So if you know for sure why...don't tell me please!! <Hands over my ears> Laa laa laa laa laa!! I can't hear you!! Hehe


Love Karren

[Marla S]

Ok Ladies, I know it but won't tell it ..... ( one should not lie :slap: ):blushing:

DonnaT gave a good answer. The womb thing is pretty usfull to de-scare SOs and friends. If this could be scientificaly proven, this answer bears a lot of elegance and could make our life a bit more easy (society wise). I don't think that will happen soon, though.

Other than that, IMO the answer would make sense only, if a cure could be derived from it ... but I don't want to be "cured" ... the patient sits elswhere.

[FROCKYHORROR]

If you'd asked the average person in the street, they might say "Its cos you're a kinky pervert".....I hate to think of myself like that and so strive to find a more flattering reason, and one that takes the blame from me,like saying "its a part of what/who i am" or genetics, and the above view is just from bigots that don't understand...trouble is i torment myself with this one little nagging thought "what if they're right?". What if their simplistic opinion is the truth,and its that truth we can't face,so we look for other reasons, anything but that killer label "kinky pervert" and the horrible connatations that go with it.I realy don't want that to be the "why" ,cos i'm a lovely person, wouldn't harm an ant,even get guilty putting bleach down the toilet for all the germs i'd kill,yet my morals collapse to oblivion when i get all dressed up, or thats what i'm supposed to think...nope i'm not having it..this is who i am, its just a part of me, it fills the void in my life,its a buetifull escape from reality,its entertainment, its relaxing,its exciting, and it makes life seem that little less dull and mundane. In the film "Tin Man" theres a quote similar to this "Sometimes you have to lose control, in order to have it"...not sure if thats right but its something like that...As for the bigots let em think what they want about us,

[ClaireJ]

because it feels right, and it sure as hell is a lot more comfortable. :happy:

[sterling12]

"Why-oh, why-oh, why-oh, did I ever leave Ohio!" Actually I'm not from Ohio but I seem to remember that old song form somewhere.

I've discussed it with my Gurlfriends in my groups about a million times. Also with the SO's who seem to always require an answer. Short and sweet...."We don't know why". I can give you some vague answer about a gnawing desire for femininity, but you would get something completely different from another CD. There are probably just about as many "why's" as the number of CDs that inhabit our planet. So, lets go with one scenario of an almost infinite number of whys.

Historically, I started dressing when I was way too young to even have an inkling of why I did it. Personally, I've never been too distressed about the Why part. However, before we could communicate like this, I often felt isolated and somewhat unique. Now I find it comforting to have so many friends and peers.

Wait a second! On second thought, I might be able to tell you "why" today! Let me clarify it a bit further, how about "why" this minute. Here goes...."Cause I freakin' like it!" "Makes me feel good and I'll probably continue until the day I die."

I reckon that is sufficient!

Peace and Love, Joanie

[coral_s]

WHY am I sitting here wearing knickers, tights, short skirt, padded bra, vest top, high heels, wig, jewelry and perfume?

It's a question that I have tried to answer for over 40 years and failed. After a couple of close calls with the grim reaper, I no longer look for answers, but just accept that that that is the way things are and do my best to enjoy it. Life is too short to over-analyse anything.

I anyone does find the answer (NOT 42 - HHGTTG). please let me know.

[Lil Miss Bekkah]

I dress because it feels RIGHT, it satisfies some deep need inside of me that I never even knew was there til I first tried it. It's a part of me that just needs to be expressed.

[melissacd]

I am less concerned with the why rather than the why not.

I am starting to come in touch with my femme self and regret that I did not make this connection sooner. We have a finite life and the sooner that we can realize that this is just a part of who we are the sooner we can get to the part where we start enjoying this wonderful piece of ourselves.

The why does not matter, the how does.

My 2 cents

[Kate Simmons]

It's because this is who I am and this is who I will always be. Ericka

[melissacd]

You are absolutely right Erica.

[Lanore]

I agree with DonnaT. I'm me and have always been me. Trying to explain why, takes up much more time than I want to spend on it. I've always liked who I am. Besides, I'm different in everything I do. Why center on one part of me.

Lanore

[Myst]

Why?

Because it feels good! And if it feels good girls, then do it! Yeah! :p

[MarinaTwelve200]

I'm wondering if for some people it's a form of escape from the stresses of their male existence. It can be so relaxing to "put on" a female alterego and temporarily forget the stresses of being husband, father, primary breadwinner, etc. I'm thinking this because My desire to dress waxes and wanes with my stress levels.

This is EXACTLY why I CD myself.

What makes the "WHY" of why we CD so hard to fathom is that we tend to focus on the CD itself and not the underlying motivations that drive us to CDing---in the first place. CDing is an ACT we in response to a condition and not a condition in itself.

We may CD to releive stress, get a rush, get a sexual response, satisfy a "fem side" need, because we may feel like a female, or for social/attraction reasoins associated with Transsexuality of homosexuality.----most people are not aware of ALL the underlying motivations save for the last ones , so they are very puzzled as they know they are not TS or gay.

[JustMe21]

I think why also and that reason is because I'm new to this I've been curious for awhile but you get caught into the society says a man should be a man and a woman should be a woman. And I'm still struggling with the thought that I have more of a feminine side and now I see just because you have more of a feminine side you'r not gay. This forumn has been a big help to me and I know a lot girls on here are very comfortable with themselves but me still in the phase on wow I'm a cd kinda have questions on why am I the way I am. Not trying to stir anything up just my 2 cents

[Stephenie S]

Trying to find out "why" is a very masculine trait.

Give in to your feminine side and just feel good about it.

We can waste a lot of time trying to answer the "why" question. MHO? Why bother?

Stephie

[Lisa B Au]

Interesting question for which, for me, I have three basic reasons

1. To transform into Lisa and that enables me to escape the day to day stresses of my very male business life. I love the whole process of the transformation. I basically become a different person.

2. I love the feeling of the softer female clothes. I undersdress a majority of the time. Love the way the fem cothes fit and hug me.

3. Rarely but i have dressed for a sexual reason

Hugs

Lisa

[ArleneRaquel]

I feel sexy. I do no harm to others. Also I like to "strutt my stuff " .:love:

[ranma 1/2]

[QUOTE=Marla S;541469]Thanks Ladies for your replys so far.

Don't get me wrong, I don't want to know why you crossdress (though I admit insanity is a striking reason ;)), but what has changed since you know or what do you expect to change if you would know.

what changed for me is since i have accepted my crossdressing is that i can be more my self.

Im so out going at work i surprise myself.

its great not being so guarded anymore and be my real self.

[Elena Ambasce]

Because we got the wrong chromosome. That's Y!!!!:heehee:

Actually, knowing Y (or Y-nought) is neither necessary nor sufficient; you'd really need to go back and know your ex too, which is a lot of work--and enough to fully define both women (XX) and men (XY). Kinda overkill.

Knowing the difference between men and women (XY-XX) isn't enough either.

You really need to divide men from women (XX/XY = X/Y). Then:

XY * X/Y = XX

Transformation complete!

Back to the clown room now...

[Krystal Lee]

Why?

I like Frocky's answer. It's because I am a pervert and it all started at three years old.

Or are you all going to say you wern't perverts at three and I was the only one?

Hugs Krystal.

[ReallyDana]

Why not?:D

[Marla S]

Or are you all going to say you wern't perverts at three and I was the only one?

Exactly !

Going through a brainwash from the very moment I was born, concerning the roles the genders have to play in our society, I also was perverted from that very moment. If the society needs perverts to feel normal, be it.
From my point of view I am none and never have been one, but they almost convinced me to see myself as one, too.

[Angie G]

The only why I'm interested in is why I don' t have more time and money to dress I do love it so! :hugs:
Angie G.

[gennee]

I dress up because I love it.

Gennee

:be: :gorgeous: :GE: