Clare
08-27-2006, 06:22 AM
Taken from another thread>>>
...I have only realized that I was TG since about 5 years ago...and yet I think now that I have probably been this way all of my life and just didn't realize it. I always thought that I was just a CD, but I also have known that I was in denial of Chrissie for many, many years. I guess you just finally get to a point after so many years that you just KNOW.Chrissie, you comments raise certain issues within me that I have always felt, accepted and igonored to varying degrees.
When I was younger back in my 20's, I thought I was just a periodic crossdresser who needed his 'fix'. I never knew why I had the 'need' to crossdress, but it just felt right. It was just a small secret part of my life that never interfered with my otherwise normal male lifestyle at the time.
During my early 30's, something changed. I began to recognise that my crossdressing was more than a passing activity. It suddenly became more serious - more frequent dressing for longer periods at a time and makeup became a very important aspect to the whole activity. Being able to 'present' as a woman became an obsession of sorts. At this time, I started to body shave regulary and wear panties and hose under my male clothing, but I still did not wear outer femme clothing as such. It was a period of rapid escalation in my crossdressing. I guess I had accepted that it was a part of me that would never go away.
Now, here I am in my 40's wearing androdgenous femme clothing in public and feeling totally comfortable in most situations. I have also learned to be receptive to my feminine traits and try to assimilate them in my life rather than reject them. Currently, the most important aspect for me is that I recognise that i'm more than just a crossdresser - I'm really transgender! (I know - lots of definitions for TG - but I'm in the spectrum somewhere!).
Looking back, I have evolved from an occassional crossdresser, to having limited acceptance, to full and open understanding of who I am as a TG person. Reading Chrissie's comments again, I wonder if I'll keep evolving to to the next level - as in TS? I don't think so as i've NEVER EVER had the feeling I am really a female within my soul. I'm certain that I've pretty much reached the plataue of my crossdressing lifestyle. The only thing left for me and my transgenderism is to come out to Family and friends and not be afraid to wear dresses and makeup in public as a normal everyday activity - which is my ultimate goal.
...I have only realized that I was TG since about 5 years ago...and yet I think now that I have probably been this way all of my life and just didn't realize it. I always thought that I was just a CD, but I also have known that I was in denial of Chrissie for many, many years. I guess you just finally get to a point after so many years that you just KNOW.Chrissie, you comments raise certain issues within me that I have always felt, accepted and igonored to varying degrees.
When I was younger back in my 20's, I thought I was just a periodic crossdresser who needed his 'fix'. I never knew why I had the 'need' to crossdress, but it just felt right. It was just a small secret part of my life that never interfered with my otherwise normal male lifestyle at the time.
During my early 30's, something changed. I began to recognise that my crossdressing was more than a passing activity. It suddenly became more serious - more frequent dressing for longer periods at a time and makeup became a very important aspect to the whole activity. Being able to 'present' as a woman became an obsession of sorts. At this time, I started to body shave regulary and wear panties and hose under my male clothing, but I still did not wear outer femme clothing as such. It was a period of rapid escalation in my crossdressing. I guess I had accepted that it was a part of me that would never go away.
Now, here I am in my 40's wearing androdgenous femme clothing in public and feeling totally comfortable in most situations. I have also learned to be receptive to my feminine traits and try to assimilate them in my life rather than reject them. Currently, the most important aspect for me is that I recognise that i'm more than just a crossdresser - I'm really transgender! (I know - lots of definitions for TG - but I'm in the spectrum somewhere!).
Looking back, I have evolved from an occassional crossdresser, to having limited acceptance, to full and open understanding of who I am as a TG person. Reading Chrissie's comments again, I wonder if I'll keep evolving to to the next level - as in TS? I don't think so as i've NEVER EVER had the feeling I am really a female within my soul. I'm certain that I've pretty much reached the plataue of my crossdressing lifestyle. The only thing left for me and my transgenderism is to come out to Family and friends and not be afraid to wear dresses and makeup in public as a normal everyday activity - which is my ultimate goal.