QuestIon

[Kirchein]

sorry if i say sth wrong

the question is

when should a person NOT "change her/his sex"? u know cos sometimes ppl change it and then they wanna be again what they were before de CRS...

(oh my god i dont know how to make questions in negative with should and must!) (sigh)

ANYWAY IM BAACK!!!!

[CaptLex]

Hey, Kirchein:

I agree with everything Lex said, and I want to add that for a lot of people a therapist can help to find the answers. Some have said that one should not transition unless you feel you absolutely have to.

Here's a link that may help you answer the question (thanks Marlena for turning me on to Raven Kaldera):

http://www.cauldronfarm.com/writing/wouldbeletter.html

Good luck! :thumbsup:

[Kirchein]

an just another question,

do u guys "hate" ur female body or u just accept it? have u though of having CRS and testosterone etc etc? since when?

cos u know this year I´ve started to think about it although I dont hate my body...i just hate that Im not socially allowed to wear ties and suits. maybe i need to be a boy for a while to see how it works

[JenniferMint]

i just hate that Im not socially allowed to wear ties and suits.

Really? Personally I think girls look just fine in ties and suits. I wasn't aware there's a social rule against it. Maybe things are different in Spain, I don't know.

[Kate Simmons]

offhand, I'd say when a person enjoys both sides of themselves like I do. I recently considered it but decided against it as I would really miss my Richard half and all of my other various aspects. Being JUST a man or JUST a woman wouldn't work in my case as it would require total dedication and attention--something I cannot do by my very nature. :happy: Ericka Kay

[CaptLex]

an just another question,

do u guys "hate" ur female body or u just accept it? have u though of having CRS and testosterone etc etc? since when?

cos u know this year I´ve started to think about it although I dont hate my body...i just hate that Im not socially allowed to wear ties and suits. maybe i need to be a boy for a while to see how it works
You'll probably get different responses to this question because everyone is different and I think it's all about how a person relates to their body. Some transguys I know totally disconnect from their bodies mentally and some are fine with their mixed-gendered bodies and celebrate the differences.

Personally, I have some days that I feel parts of my body are just an annoyance I have to put up with, and some days where I really can't stand to look in the mirror. It goes back and forth depending on my mood and other factors. I've often said I don't mind being partially female, I just mind looking like one because I don't feel like one.

If you could dress however you want to, whenever you want to, you might then be able to figure out what you most like to wear, whether it's boys' clothes, girls' clothes, a combination of both, etc., and you may decide that transitioning is not for you and dressing is enough. I know your family gives you a hard time about the dressing, so I hope you can figure it out.

[CaptLex]

Really? Personally I think girls look just fine in ties and suits. I wasn't aware there's a social rule against it. Maybe things are different in Spain, I don't know.
Jennifer,

Kerchein is young so I believe in this case (correct me if I'm wrong, Kerchein), it's a matter of disapproval from parents and not because of social rules in Spain (although I don't know anything about Spanish society anyway).

[Kirchein]

(correct me if I'm wrong, Kerchein),

please captlex its KIRCHEEEIN!! with I !!! lol:p

and well actually its because parents presure, although they usually dont say a word about how i dress when i go shopping its hard to go and take a good boy´s shirt or sweater . . .

BTW today my grammy told me that one of my cousins (i have 21 (XD) ) is about to get married on july, that means I´ll have to wear again skirts, dresses makes up etc and deal with i hope u know what kind of feelings im talking about. OOh men it would be so great to wear a MAN´s suit

and again BTW thanks for the answers

[Kimberley]

please captlex its KIRCHEEEIN!! with I !!! lol:p

and well actually its because parents presure, although they usually dont say a word about how i dress when i go shopping its hard to go and take a good boy´s shirt or sweater . . .

BTW today my grammy told me that one of my cousins (i have 21 (XD) ) is about to get married on july, that means I´ll have to wear again skirts, dresses makes up etc and deal with i hope u know what kind of feelings im talking about. OOh men it would be so great to wear a MAN´s suit

and again BTW thanks for the answers

******************
Sorry to hear about the wedding. I think everyone on this site can relate to that problem. You'll be fine.

As to transition, that is such an open ended subject that there is no real answer. Find a therapist who specializes in gender and see what happens. Sometimes our feelings are buried beneath our rational minds and it takes time to find them.

Kimberley.

[Sandra]

I´ll have to wear again skirts, dresses makes up etc

Hope you don't mind me butting in, but if you don't want to wear a skirt or dress why not wear trousers and jacket, I know that they will possibly be female cut but if you're not happy in a skirt or dress surely this would feel better, sorry if I'm waffling on here.:happy:

[Kirchein]

again ppl thx for ur answers, u r sooo quickly lol

this time i just gotta say 2 things

1- to kimberley: yep i think its a good idea to go toa therapist, cos i dont hate my "sex" just my "gender"....and sometimes i think i exagerate too much

2- to Sandra gg. yeaah i know that there are """"suits"""" for woman, but u know i prefer a REAL ONE! (XD)

have a nice day and dont drink too much coffee

byes

[Kate Simmons]

Just wanted to add Kirchein that it depends on my mood what I will wear and what I will look like. Like Cap said, you may want to try a combination of guy and girl clothes. I do that a lot and don't feel weird at all because of the two aspects of my nature. Hope we helped a little. I know it isn't easy no matter what side of the "fence" you are on. Ericka Kay