Where do I go from here

[adnyp]

I like to wear womens underwear. My wife doesn't know and is very straight laced. The other night after returning from a trip I put one pair of panties (Plain, white fruit of the loom, with their logo in the waist band) in the laundry. Today I found them in my underwear drawer, washed and folded, she neveer said a thing.

Where do I go from here??

[Tina Dixon]

Wear them again I guess:thumbsup:

[Staci]

Sounds like she knew about it. Either she understands and has given them to you or she has decided that she does not want to wear them anymore so you may as well have them since you were so interested in them. Either way. It looks like she gave them to you.

[EricaCD]

I'd suggest a Lise Charmel thong, but that's just me :)

[eleyna]

I like to wear womens underwear. My wife doesn't know and is very straight laced. The other night after returning from a trip I put one pair of panties (Plain, white fruit of the loom, with their logo in the waist band) in the laundry. Today I found them in my underwear drawer, washed and folded, she neveer said a thing.

Where do I go from here??

That sounds like a statement, possibly meaning one of two things, so I would suggest you start by showing her that you still love her in all the same ways - anything that you've gotten lazy at doing since you got married. Take her to a movie. Nothing interpretable as effeminate, and nothing that says "looky, I'm still straight" or "I don't wear panties". And then leave it there. Don't change, don't become someone else. Give it a few days, maybe a week.

Then find a way to bring it up. "Huh, you put these panties in my drawer? Is there something I should know?" and be prepared to be honest when she says "They weren't mine" or "I thought they were yours". She could be thinking they indicate you have been unfaithful... :( Of course, if that was the case, you might want to get the conversation out of the way sooner rather than later. With your wife in the room, go to the drawer, fish them out and ask "These are mine?" -- asking "You know" could be disasterous if she is thinking something else.

[ColleenCD]

Let's be clear, your wife knows. She sent you a message that she knows by placing the freshly laundered panties in your drawer. In societies perfect world, she made a mistake and they don't belong there. But we know better. She's waiting for an answer to her message.

She may not say anything for a while, waiting for you to explain why they were in the laundry. At some intimate moment, she will ask you or you will find the courage to address the situation with her. Be gentle and patient and humble. Her straight laced style may become rejecting to limiting to accepting. Answer her questions straightforward and honest. Give her time to digest it, with many more conversations to come. Consider providing her some books on crossdressing which will help her understand why we do what we do.

Above all, let her know you love her, and keep us posted. Good luck

Colleen

[Ashley Helen]

You don't say who the panties belonged to in the first place. Whether you bought them for yourself or 'borrowed' your wifes would give different starting points for where to go from here.

Helen xx

[Billijo49504]

I think it's time for the conversation. That you are not gay, and you don't have a misstress. And the big one, you do still love her even more than before....BJ

[Penny]

Your wife knows one thing. Those panties were not hers. She may know about you or have her suspisions but what if she doesn't? Then this may
be eating at her something bad. What if she thinks they belonged to another woman. It is time to talk to her. If you love her, it's time to talk to her and
own up to the panties. Honesty is the best policy!

[FRANCENA F.L]

love francena xoxo

[Wendy me]

i would not look at it as a hidden message that she knows and is OK with it ... don't expect her to hook you up with a make over and a girls night out shopping and clubbing ..... what i believe might have happened is she was distracted and just going through the motions and did not notice .... sooner or latter you will need to be more careful or start to tell her about your dressing......

[dancer1]

Got ta make the morning last, are they your's or her's.
If they are yours how were they aquiered, she and you will find at a minum 100 question indepth over 1 pantie.
Where you go from here is up to the two of you, some in this forum have exstensive relationships with thier wives, where as the second life coexist. I dont thing your there yet.Best Wishes Nadeen

[Kate Simmons]

If I've learned anything at all, it's that women are smarter than you may think. It's like Aunt May. On her deathbed she told Peter she knew all along he was Spiderman. She said how could I NOT know? Your SO knows about your other self, believe me. Two people can't be so close and not know things. What she chooses to do with that information is anyone's guess. Women have memories like elephants and watch everything like a cat and KNOW what's going on even if they don't choose to say anything. Next move ,if you decide to do or say anything, is yours I guess. Ericka Kay

[Stephenie S]

Geez girls,

All this wondering and interpreting, signs and symbolic acts, does she or doesn't she, who know what and why.

You just have to TALK. that's the preferred method of communication here. And the only one where you can be reasonably certain of getting your point across, and understanding hers'.

Pick a good time and talk. What to say? I can't tell. Something like, "I noticed that you washed my panties and put them back in my drawer. Would you like to talk about that?", springs to mind. Something direct and to the point might help. Maybe, "You know, I really liked wearing those panties you put in my drawer. They were so much more comfortable than my tighty-whities."

Talk, talk, talk. It's not that hard once you get going.

Lovies,
Stephenie

[yamicd]

I think the best thing to do is be honest with yourself and your wife. I told my wife about my love of this before we were married. Good luck

[Brigett]

I agree with Billijo, but you should be asking yourself where you want to go from here. What is in your heart? How can you explain it to your wife at the appropriate time? :2c:

Brigett

[Sandra]

Bring the subject up of the pants being in your draw and see what she says, it could have just been that she put then in the wrong draw then again she could be waiting for you to say something,

[MarilynH]

That sounds like a statement, possibly meaning one of two things, so I would suggest you start by showing her that you still love her in all the same ways - anything that you've gotten lazy at doing since you got married. Take her to a movie. Nothing interpretable as effeminate, and nothing that says "looky, I'm still straight" or "I don't wear panties". And then leave it there. Don't change, don't become someone else. Give it a few days, maybe a week.

Then find a way to bring it up. "Huh, you put these panties in my drawer? Is there something I should know?" and be prepared to be honest when she says "They weren't mine" or "I thought they were yours". She could be thinking they indicate you have been unfaithful... :( Of course, if that was the case, you might want to get the conversation out of the way sooner rather than later. With your wife in the room, go to the drawer, fish them out and ask "These are mine?" -- asking "You know" could be disasterous if she is thinking something else.

I would have to agree with Eleyna, hun. You can't assume she knows you wear, but you can't assume that she doesn't think you are being unfaithful. So you certainly don't want to let the situation stay, as is. That could cause more damage, to the relationship, than any other course of action.

Good luck, and let us know how things go.

Hugs.