How do u tell the wife u like to crossdress?

[tootall452]

At on time my wife did catch me with some of my favorite panties in the wash one time. I was sitting in the living room watching TV, She came out of the laundry room with them an asked who's r these. I know here first thought who have I been seening. So I told her that they r mine at first she looked at me an did not understand, an she alomost made me wear them for her, but it came to be that she made me cut them up. If u would like to know I am 45 she is 58. She does not believe in men dressing up in womens clothes. I still wear pantie while I am on the road driving, I love the feel of them. I just would wish she would understand. I have tried talking to her about this an she just does not aggreee at all , plus she added I do not of any men that does these things. Only if she knew that there alot of out here in the real world that love the feel of womens clothes::happy:

[Ellaine]

Hi Toots Just a thought.... You might ask this sometime....

"Would you agree that we ALL have a male and female side to ourselves? "


Keep it slow. :)

[loki_uk]

Throwing away or binning clothes seems to be a common story, it's just how to handle the situation that seems tricky

Wish I knew the answer but I don't

[Emily1]

Just tell her ...
Just be honest with her....
Be honest to yourself....
Communicate with her....

[noname]

I was upfront from the very beginning before I even bought anything. I just told her how I was feeling and the like.

[Vicky_Scot]

Before you do anything it seems that your wife really does not accept men who crossdress. So with this in mind you really need to think about the consequences of telling her. I told my wife but knew that by doing this I was risking loosing her and the kids and my secret being exposed to anyone who would listen. Thankfully she accepts and loves me for me.

So the choice is don't tell her or tell her and risk her walking.

Sorry for being so straight to the point but you need to be willing to accept the fact that she might take it badly.

I wish you all the best on whatever descision you make.

[tootall452]

Thanks for the advise skirtlover.But at this time If she found out I may loose
her an the new house we just bought. I do love my wife very much, we moved closer to wear her parents live because they r in their mid to late 80's an she is the only daughter.

[brandie]

my wife is the same way but she dose not mind if i were panties just not to bed with her so it is not to bad and our schedules make it easy me to dress up when she is at work

[julie w]

telling the wife is always a gamble ,sometimes a necessary gamble. there is
no way you can tell what her reaction will be ( im talking from my experience)
it all depends what you want if its just dressing now and then or wearing panties, may be its not worth the risk in telling her .but if you have to dress
more for your own sanity you may have to tell her , I think its when we want
to sit with wife and watch tv dressed or go shopping with them thats when the trouble can start

[Janice Ashton]

Like many have said on this subject, 'Be very careful' I told my wife in a Big coming out statement after I couldn't stand being in the closet any longer as it was driving me crazy. She divorced me, took the lot and told everyone we knew! That was a very difficult period, However, time moves on and now life is good again living alone doing what I want do.
You really have to know your wife inside out (if possible) before you take the route of coming out to them.
It's a 'Real' problem and you spend many hours thinking how you are going to approach the subject. Good Luck hope it works out for you.

Louise
Once you let the Genie out the bottle it's hard to go back!!

[fionasboots]

Time to recycle the good advice I got:

Listen, talk, listen, listen a bit more, talk.

There isn't really much else to do short of sitting her in front of this site and saying "look I told you it wasn't just me" ... but that would probably be a *really* bad idea as there's probably, erm, a bit too much erm, "information" here - if she freaky at panties she'll explode if she reads anything here :heehee:

[Susan Johnson]

One evening when we were in bed, one of wifes nighties was on a table near the bed, I asked if I could wear it while we made love. She agreed and the rest as they say is history (or my story) that was 25 years ago and although not enthusiastic she is supportive and will buy items I like in charity shops. I realise I am very lucky.:love:

[Nigella]

My :2c:

The original question has been answered in a roundabout way, you admitted that the panties she found were yours. What you have not told her is the extent of your "cross dressing".

What is not healthy, either for you or your marriage, is to carry the lie on.

Having said that, only you can tell if she will be receptive to the news that it is not just panties that you like to wear, but have an alter ego.

Advice on this site is always forthcoming and can be confusing, people offer "what worked for me". Just remember that we don't know your situation and TBH never will, we can only liken it to our own because it sounds similar.

There is no easy answer, at the end of the day, no matter what support you receive from this site, you are on your own.

Sorry to be blunt, but that is the way the cookie crumbles.

[lucy]

i think its hard to tell .. i love her and dont wanne lose her or the kids ... somehow i think she knows but im not sure about it ... not telling is for now the best .. when i am getting caught well will see what happens

[tootall452]

:happy: Well it looks like I will have to keep it to myself for now, my clothes will remian in the truck.I know one of these days I will get caught with clothes in
the truck, but then I will have to deal with it.For the time being only two people know about it my mom an I just told my little sister.She was suprised I wore her things an my big sister clothes well mom tried to stop me but it did not work I was able to hide it better. As for mom she knows now but she has passed away with the secret that I carry until I told my little sister.
Lately I have looking at corset, waist cinnchers, nylons an bodysuites. Since I am 6'7 it is hard to find things in my size, I have so far found which pantyhose to buy ,corset an waist cinnchers I may have found a place but I would like to goto Nevada to a place to check out what they have for me if not they can order it or have it made for me.
Thanks for the help ladies I know it will be hard for know but one of these days she will betold,for now I will be :hiding: .