Passing for you or others?

[Georgina]

If you want to pass in public is this because you want to or because you need to to blend in or feel safe? Georgina.

[sue ellan]

both i guess but i never will pass as a girl. so i guess it is to just feel save.
sue ellan

[Kate Simmons]

Nah, I'm myself for myself. Don't give a hoot what others think really. Ericka Kay

[Karren H]

Both....I dress to look the best I can and where I go out in public typically is out in the coal fields...very back waterish, very conservative..very religous...

So it's either stay home, pass, or die trying. Hehehe

Love Karren

[Kate Simmons]

Both....I dress to look the best I can and where I go out in public typically is out in the coal fields...very back waterish, very conservative..very religous...

So it's either stay home, pass, or die trying. Hehehe

Love KarrenI admire your fortitude Karren. You have a lot more gusto than most.:happy: Ericka Kay

[Jenna1561]

Because I want to pass.


Jenna

[Penny]

If you want to pass in public is this because you want to or because you need to to blend in or feel safe? Georgina.

I don't consider a step out in public as having to pass at all. Psyschologically, trying to pass also means that the posibility exists that one could fail and failure is a hard pill to swollow. In addition, passing as a female may imply that an attempt is made to be deceptive and may spawn guilt. I have no guilt about crossdressing. The great thing about crossdressing is that it affords me the opportunity to look, or attempt to look, as I feel. That
means sometimes sophistacated (conservative), powerful (red), fragile (pink) ect.. While it's true that for the most part I do, as most would put it, "pass", that is not my goal; it is my constitutional right to express myself ( not at the expense of others) in anyway I choose and that means dressing as I please regardless what others may think. No matter how I may look, my DNA and fingerprints have not changed; I'm still me.

[JoAnnDallas]

I'm not sure about passing, but I do want to blend in when I am out. Even if they do notice, as long as they are polite and don't make a Scene, I am satisfied.

[Lawren]

I don't consider myself passable in any way. I think it is more an issue of wearing fem clothes properly and showing that clothing does not make the person. After all, clothing, at it's basic level, is just a protective covering. With that thought in mind, why should it be "genderized" at all?

[Calliope]

If you want to pass in public is this because you want to or because you need to to blend in or feel safe? Georgina.

Rich question, really. Seeking safety is one angle, seeking validation is another. These two are certainly compatible desires. Myself, I think validation is more rewarding if it comes from within and safety is best achieved by not trying to 'fool' men (who resent feeling gay - if for only an instant). Big philosophic line on this issue. (Also, some CDs are more 'organic,' i.e. no breastforms & padding, than others.)

[Lindahexi]

If you want to pass in public is this because you want to or because you need to to blend in or feel safe? Georgina.

I'd love to go out in public and pass as a female, it would give me a lot of pleasure and self satisfaction, but alas I know I'm not good enough to pass, so I can only dream about it.:sad:

[KarenSusan]

I think if I could blend in, then to a large degree I have passed.

[pinkshelly]

To me, passing means i'm doing it right. It means I've chosen the right out fit, the right shoes and done the make-up well. Passing is more of a compliment to myself that i'm being the best woman I can be. It never has been about playing anyone for a fool by deception. If I can go into public and not out myself till I speak (deep voice), it feels like i'm doing justice to woman. Thats the way I see the whole "passing" thing.
Hugg, Shelly.

[Nigella]

What is this fixation with passing or not?

If you are still in the closet, then it don't matter, no-one is going to see you to pass a comment.

If you are out in the big wide world occasionally, then you try to do the best you can and ignore the comments if any

If you are out in the big wide world 24/7, you have got past the point of caring what others think, you are being you.

[princessmichelle]

Hi,

I don't usually cd in public, and the main reason is fear: at this stage there is no way I could pass, and if I cant pass I open myself up to legal problems ("there's a _____ in the wrong bathroom"). Failure to pass also leads to insults or even to assault.

When I think about passing I think about it reducing my fear for my legal and physical safety.

princess (?) Michelle

[Calliope]

To me, passing means i'm doing it right.

[...] but alas I know I'm not good enough to pass, so I can only dream about it.:sad:

What a heartbreaker!!!

Right way, wrong way. Left, right, forward march.

Just like the stupid straight world.


Hi,
When I think about passing I think about it reducing my fear for my legal and physical safety.

I could understand this if you lived in Podunk Utah but you're in NYC.

!!!!

The severest prisons are the ones we build for ourselves.

[LouiseCassell]

If you want to pass in public is this because you want to or because you need to to blend in or feel safe? Georgina.

all the above reasons I would guess

[Marla S]

Passing would definitely be interesting and fun, but because this won't happen it is hard to tell what it would give me.

Sometimes I wish I could pass, because of safety conciderstions.
1.) I could try a lot of different fashion styles.
2.) Despite all the violence and mokking on the streets, women still have kind of a safty bonus, that men in dress don't have.

[Sky]

If you want to pass in public is this because you want to or because you need to to blend in or feel safe? Georgina.

Because I want to look good and want people to think (at least from a minimum distance) that I'm an attractive woman. Call me shallow if you want. But don't call me Shirley. :D

[Cheryl T]

I don't think of it as "passing" although that used to be my dream.
I just want to be able to go out and do whatever... shop, dine, shop, movies, shop... well you get the idea.
My first time out was with my spouse and we went to a large mall. Soon after we arrived (I was sooo nervous about being "read") we used the elevator and were there with a couple. I ignored them but my spouse told me the wife kept checking me out. For a little while I would surreptitiously watch the masses as we shopped to see who was watching me. To my surprise ... no one was. They were all too busy with their lives to worry about lil (6') ole me.
Another time I went to the movies with some girls from my Tri-Ess chapter. Our president had gotten too many tickets and as she went to return them we stood off to the side. As she got the refund she overheard two young girls standing next to her talking about the "guy/girls" over there. She commented ... they're just out to have fun. The girls went... "whatever"... and walked away not knowing the older woman they just talked to was one of us.
Sometimes you never know....
Most times... no one cares.

[tekla west]

If you really do 100%, if no one can tell you are male, that everyone would see you as female - and if given that you feel SAFE, then you are not paying attention. Women are at much higher risk of attack then men are.

[Sandra]

The more you worry about it the less likley you are to pass or blend in, if you go about your own buisness and not looking for problems while out you will find it a lot eaiser. People are not out looking for Cds they do have their own buisness to go do, yes if they spot one they will have a good look and comment and yes I do know sometimes the comments aren't nice but if you just ignore it then all the better.

[Nigella]

The more you worry about it the less likley you are to pass or blend in, if you go about your own buisness and not looking for problems while out you will find it a lot eaiser. People are not out looking for Cds they do have their own buisness to go do, yes if they spot one they will have a good look and comment and yes I do know sometimes the comments aren't nice but if you just ignore it then all the better.

:lol: :lol2: Sez she who will punch out the lights of anyone who passes a bad comment about me

[Sandra]

:lol: :lol2: Sez she who will punch out the lights of anyone who passes a bad comment about me


Last time I stick up for you :rolleyes:

[Kieron Andrew]

Last time I stick up for you :rolleyes:geez is she being mean over here too lol

[Sandra]

geez is she being mean over here too lol

Look I've been on holiday for a week with her what do you expect.

Sorry Georgina going a bit of topic here, back to it now.:hugs:

[julie w]

I try to be as believable as possible but wear a skirt most of the time
I know Its easyer In jeans and t shirt but I can do that as a guy

[Carol A]

I find all the replys very interesting, as for me I guess it is both. The wife and I used to go out together when we were members of Tri-Ess but since we moved to a small rual town she saids no. But to get back to the question I want to pass and if you pass you feel much safer and much more comfortable.