Bad Gurl

[Joy Carter]

I know I'm wrong, God I know I have upset her to no end. But all our married lives I wore her stuff instead of buying my own. Not that she would have accepted that but I think it would have been easier on her had I bought my own clothes. She told me that "I had stolen all her femininity by waring her stuff", it took her thirty years to tell me that. I know she won't buy anything nice for fear that I might try it on. That is no longer as I have bought what I want lately. But that does not heel the wounds she feels. So GG's Cd what do you think? "I'm a Baaad Gurl :o "

[brandie]

Joe
I have the same prob with my wife at first she was all for it then she went against it and has been there ever since. just wish she would make up her mind eather with me or not.

good luck with it

brandie

[Kate Simmons]

It's amazing. My wife used to say the same thing and react the same way. Are/were we bad? I don't think so, just desparate. Ericka

[Sandra]

In effect you wife has no clothes she can call her own and she has every right to be upset.

[angelfire]

Borrowing without persmission is usually called theft as far as I am concerned. I have never raided anyone's closet or drawers before.

[celtic.blue.eyes]

Gee, I've got just the opposite problem....my wife is always borrowing my things which aren't so frumpy! Maybe it's time to treat her to a trip to Victoria's Secret, with the understanding that the new items are sacred. :2c:

[Nikki Dee]

Can see her point love...I have a very supportive and accepting wife...BUT she wouldn't want me to wear her stuff.!...and I wouldn't dare.!!!LOL..She will wear my clothes though...and I don't mind that...it sort of "feminises" them even more.!!
Nikki. x

[Penny]

Here is what I think is a good way to go: What's her's is her's, what's mine is her's and what's ours is ours. This works well.

[Karren H]

Yeah. We are all bad I fear...but mine never found out I wore her things and I'm not telling!! She found my skirts and knows that I have my own clothes...And hers never fit right, back when I was larger than her, everything was too small and now that I'm smaller than she is everything she has is way too large for me!! Just can't seem to get coordinated!!

And I'd rather have my own things, since our tastes in fem clothing are 180 degrees apart!! Guess who's more fem?? Lol

Love Karren

[Roberta Lynn]

Without permission it's best not to wear her stuff, especially lingerie.
Don't know what you can do to heal the wounds, maybe replace her wardrobe and let her know you won't touch it.
Good luck. :love:

[Sasha Anne Meadows]

My wife borrows my stuff occasionally and I don't mind a bit. Sometimes at work she would get some nice compliments on her outfits from my closet. If they only knew! She wore my long dark blue dress to a friend's funeral and looked very nice. I think I actually have more girl clothes than she has.

Sasha Anne

[pinkshelly]

I really can't wear anything the s.o. wears so I got my own stuff, and alot of it. I'ts funny though the step daughter ocationally wears some of my stuff. I have even lent the step daughters best friend shoes and jewlery. I too dress more feminine than the s.o. which is kinda a bone when we go out. I'm the lipstick lesbian. COOL.
Huggs, Shelly.

[Nigella]

Here is what I think is a good way to go: What's her's is her's, what's mine is her's and what's ours is ours. This works well.

We have a similar saying in our house

"She says, I Do"

[Snookums]

:naughty Joy :spank:

[Joy Carter]

Here is what I think is a good way to go: What's her's is her's, what's mine is her's and what's ours is ours. This works well.

Penny you got it better than me " What's HER"S is HER"S, what's mine is HER'S, What's ours is HER'S." :devil: Aw don't cry for me I have it good she just want's the paycheck and I get to stay another week. It's our little arrangement. LOL:o

[Di]

Well Joy....she has told you just how she feels...so go from there...buy your own things and promise her you will not touch her things again............for me...I like to share things..but that is me.....but her telling you how she feels...is important...grow from there.....and respect her wishes.

[sparks]

Thats' right! You Bad UH HUH!

I knew from first site you were a bad apple. Couldn't fool me one bit.

[Noel Chimes]

Well for me it's just the opposite. My wife and I have this little game we play called." You Pick".:c9: The rules are simple, One of us goes and takes a shower (usually me) and the other will pick out something to wear. :love: Well my wife chose a full length (on her 3/4 on me) burgandy w/ jacket.
Well out I come looking like I'm going to work, and she says with a pout. " now that's a shame when my husband looks better in my clothes than I do.:eek: Since then I have bought my own.

[Megan72]

I think she is definitly suffering from an invasion of her privacy.

She has expressed to you that she does not want you in her clothes, that is understandable to me. Look at it like friends. Most men would be pretty upset if their SO became one of the guys and became better friends with their football budies than they are. It is more an issue of you taking something of hers.

Most of us are probably guilty of this at one time or another. A sign of our own selfishness probably. Take things slowly and work through the issues with her, making sure not to be in male thought patterns when you do it. To her this is much deeper than a male is willing to give credit. Either privacy, self-esteem, vanity, or many other ideas; she needs you to try and understand her needs and desires.

[Joy Carter]

Borrowing without permission is usually called theft as far as I am concerned. I have never raided anyone's closet or drawers before.

Theft is when you take without permission but her clothes were never far from the hangar. Another element to theft would be to deprive that person of their property again the stuff never left the bedroom. But then again in my state things owned by a married couple are called "community property" so it hardly amounts to a theft Angle. Invasion of privacy ? I totally agree and I have apologized to her. So now she is having to deal with "the other woman's" clothes in the closet. Something that she is having a hard time dealing with.:o

[Emeralddragon]

I see an easy and fun solution. You take all her clothes and simply buy her new ones to replace them. That way you have lots of stuff and she not only has stuff she can feel comfortable in but its all new and best of all you get to do lots of shopping in order to get the plan to work.

[Angie G]

My wife and I share dresses skirts tops but not lingerie and can't fit each others shoes :hugs:
Angie

[Ellaine]

I've just been reading how so many women are crazy for not wanting a crossdressing hubby.
Well for those that get into the habit of secret "borrowing", which really amounts to pulling out of shape, creasing, adding a new odour, and maybe a hair or two to her garments, I'd have to say; who want's such insensitivity in a partner?


Authorised sharing, is a beautiful thing :)

[Stephenie S]

Stay out of other peoples closets. Keep your hands off their stuff. This is so impolite. And pretty gross, too. What GG wants to find tread marks on their panties?

My drawers and closet space are mine and I don't want others snooping around. I can imagine other people feel the same way too, especially about intimates. Get your own. It's soooo much nicer. And fun to shop too. Then you won't be stretching and dirtying and messing up someone elses clothes.

Really, it's much more fun to have your own. You will love it. And, you will respect yourself in the morning too. (lol)

Lovies,
Steph

[Joy Carter]

God I'm such a Schmuck ! And Sparks Ya Hockey Puck I'll get ya ! LOL:devil:

[Cassy11]

"Am I a Bad Girl?", "clothes are community property", "Shame on me". You are really making lite of this. You may never know how deeply hurt she is.

Now she is the one with a problem because there are other womens clothes in the closet.

[Bernice]

Well Joy, I consider you a friend, so please remember this when I say I think you are rationalizing.

At the same time, I know your self esteem is particularly fragile. You are not a schmuck, or any of those other extreme terms you used. But you should try harder to see this situation from your SO's persepective. It's hard enough for her to deal with your crossdressing. It is even harder for her to feel as though she has no clothes of her own.

Imagine you were called (professionally) to a domestic dispute, and you found out one partner was wearing the other partner's clothing without permission? Would you declare it "domestic property" under those circumstances? Food for thought.

[Joy Carter]

"Am I a Bad Girl?", "clothes are community property", "Shame on me". You are really making lite of this. You may never know how deeply hurt she is.

Now she is the one with a problem because there are other womens clothes in the closet.

No Cassy I'm more in tune with this than you know. It's just my way of dealing with the situation. The "borrowing" of her stuff has not taken place for sometime. I have an undying love for her and I know I have hurt her. She is always first in our relationship. I was on a selfish trip when I did borrow her things and I should have just come out an told her I wanted my own things. But her reaction to this whole CD thing is to not talk about it, which has caused her and myself much stress. Several years ago I bought my own stuff and her reaction was less than negative. That was my only purge. Well and Bernice in legal terms it is "community property" but in real terms it's deeply personal and that I know all to well. So now where am I on this ? I'm here on CD.com talking about one of the most deeply personal subject that has affected the lives of an otherwise happy couple. Where do I fit in with the CDing ? I just know in my mind that I can't accept myself fully till she even acknowledges that I'm cross gendered. It just doesn't exist in her world, and I'm her world. Yeah SCHMUCK that's me.