new reaction

[brandie]

my so came home today i was wearing jeans and a tshit (bra and inhansers in tow) and she said not a word. maybe a new door is opening, proff is in the pudding.
I just wont her to let me be my self at home, but after 6 kids it may be hard for her to let me be my self. we were the best friends for so long.
After one of our twin boys died at 10 months old we had a hard time at it.
but i think it made us closer. we still had 6 children to raise, no time for self pitty but now that the last won has moved out i think she is starting to look back. not sure about that .
i hop i am not boring you with my life but i belive it is why i am soft and gental. just dont make me mad after 5 boys, and my own gun shop i have no pationts for jurks, but i know there are not any of them here. after looking through most of the threads i see nothing but love and carring for all no matter who or what they are or wont to be.
Just wonted to let you all know how and where i come from maby a little rough around the edges cant spell for crap (sorry for the slang) just a nother cd with a misson to be the best girl i know.


love brandie

[Tina Dixon]

Weel heck its good to spill your beans to the girls at times:hugs:

[brandie]

thanks for your support. just wont to find my self, life can be a bitch but only if you let it. and i plan on winning this battle for my self (god willing)
brandie

[GG Vanya]

Brandie,

Six kids.....sheesh God bless ya both! I raised three sons, and Lawdy Lawdy Ms Clawdie that was a job!

You mentioned that the last child has now moved out and it seems your wife is "looking back". Just as an FYI, Moms go through something called the "empty nest syndrome" when the last child moves out. This can leave her with a sense of loss of direction. Being Mom is such an all consuming "job" (for lack of a better word) that when that job is completed, they feel lost.

Now is a good time to "re romance" your wife. Now you two can do all the things you put off while the kids were growing up. She needs assurance that she is still needed, and very much loved as your wife, lover, lifemate and best friend.

You didn't mention how long you've been out to your wife, so I really can't respond to her new reaction. One thing is certain though, now that the nest is empty, you have more freedom to "be yourself at home" if she is, or can be, accepting of that.

The phrase has been said SO many times, but it's still imperative that you take baby steps with her and communicate. Keep in mind the things I said above and hopefully you two (or three including Brandie) will have much love, intimacy and fun in your "golden years"!

[paulaN]

You sound way too much like me except for the six kids part. Wow two was more than I could handle. still have one at home.

[brandie]

I have been out too her for about eight months.
some days are better then others and some day just suck


brandie

[Carroll]

it takes time for some wifes to accept a hubby that wears womens clothing. One piece of advice I can give you, and will be reflected by most people here, is when she agrees to let you dress in the house, is not to go overboard. I did that and my wife shut me down real quick. It took a year before I was permitted to dress when she was home. Now I dress when I please and dont if she ask me not to...communication is the key. I would also like to say that I am very sorry for your loss.

Carroll

[Angie G]

Hi Brandie sorry for the loss of you child,
I hope you so is going to be more excepting of Brandie support of a loved one is a great help I thank God for my wife. :hugs:
Angie

[Sheila]

I have been out too her for about eight months.
some days are better then others and some day just suck
brandie
brandie,
my DH has only been out to me for 2 months and yes for both of you some days will be better than others and yes some days just plain suck.

As others have said real baby steps and if you can talk talk and talk some more, then listen to what she is saying and I really mean listen don't just hear. You won't be able to tell her everything she needs or wants to know, she may ask the same question several hundred times (or it will feel like that to you).

Please remember you have known for a long time, she is having to take this all in in one go, she will have many of the normal fears of other SO's, for you for her and for your relationship and unfortunately probably no local support system (by that I mean friends and family), has she visited any of the forums?

I wish you both well and as Vanya said reaffirm your love for her and her position in your life.

Jess(SO)

[Paula Thomas]

Brandie - You may want to send your wife a big bouquet of flowers with a card that tells her how much you love her and for putting up with all of your faults.

:love:

[brandie]

thanks bought her flowers today.
she said how are you and what did you do with my husband. but i know she loved them.
LIKE YOU ALL SAID BABY STEPS.

BRANDIE