Why do I dress???????

[Jennifer Giovannetta]

Today it occured to me out of the blue. "Why do I crave wearing womens clothes?" I am a man, and I like being a man. I like man stuff. Just as I may enjoy being jennifer in public, I also enjoy being a man in public.
Is this behavior hardwired into my brain when I was in the womb, or is it learned as I experienced life? I have heard some of the theories. But I sometimes wonder why I crave something, that to society, is unacceptable.
Lately, I have been wanting to dress as a woman more and more. And this is frustrating. It appears that I may have to venture out. It is a scary proposition, but it may be for my own good. I say this because the act of going out as Jennifer, may be a release to my frustrations. It is very important to me to get out dressed.
For the first time ever, I faced my self in the mirror while dressed. (When dressed I wear a wig, undies, skirt, blouse, and heels. And an honest assesment of my ability to pass is, with a proper makeup application, and smart clothes that hide my masculine features, I would feel comfortable around other girls.
The time has come that I need to face the facts. I am a crossdresser and I do need to go out. So, if you are from central New Jersey, please e-mail me. I need some other girls help and support.


Jennifer

[angelfire]

I am similar in that I too like my male self and like being a male in public, but at the same time crave feminine things. Still haven't gone out as I don't have a complete wardrobe, or any make-up to look passable, which while is alright for some to not pass, I personally feel if I go out I want to at least pass from a distance.

[Roberta Lynn]

I found this forum looking for the answers to the same questions you're asking.
Didn't really find the answers but found a lot of good people here.
Reading their post helped me be more comfortable with myself and helped me realize the answers weren't as important as I had thought.

BTW: Did you say this was the first time you faced yourself in the mirror? +?

[Jennifer Giovannetta]

Yes Roberta. Tonite was the first time I ever faced my self fully in the mirror in drag. I brushed my hair and it was not so bad. Up until this point, I avoided looking in the mirror.

[Melinda G]

I feel the same way, and think about it a lot. I enjoy being a guy, and have no desire to actually "be" a woman. I think we have been condtioned from an early age to associate womens clothing, with sex. Items like panties, lacy bras, nylons and high heels have always been sex objects, which is why women wear them, instead of plain cotton underwear, boots, and jeans. Men have a natural curiousity about these things, and I think it is just carrying it a step further to actually put them on and wear them. We are turned on by women wearing nylons and high heels, more than women wearing jeans and boots. And we are turned on by actually wearing high heels and nylons, etc. I think there are a lot of men who think about CDing, and probably can't bring themselves to actually do it, especially the macho types. Just look at the number of lurkers viewing these posts, but never joining or posting.

[Jennifer Giovannetta]

Melinda that is a great point about the men who never do it. Thanks

[Billijo49504]

I too some time wonder about dressing. But the best I can come up with is, it makes me feel normal. I know it doesn't make sense, but that's the way I feel. I actually feel like I should be dressed. Tonight I was dressed in my undies, ala fem, a girls t shirt and LB jeans. Throw on a work shirt over all that, and that's the way I went to work tonight...BJ

[KarenSusan]

I found this forum looking for the answers to the same questions you're asking.
Didn't really find the answers but found a lot of good people here.
Reading their post helped me be more comfortable with myself and helped me realize the answers weren't as important as I had thought.

It's amazing how similar we all are. The common thread seems to be that none of us can explain why we want to do this but we all want to do this very badly and the clothes just feel natural and right.

[Khriss]

.. I hate to be "labled" but "transvestite" comes pretty close, for me...
short of being "sweet" or living in "Transylvania" eh ? hehe xx"K":eek: :D

[noname]

It is very important to me to get out dressed.

I know the feeling. Although I don't try to pass I do get that feeling. Much of me feeling indignant, as I feel I have the right to, as women wear pants. I feel the need to exercise my right, just as much as women do.

[stacylynn1]

Hi Jennfer I too like being a man and I do all the macho stuff sometimes way too far but I do know that when life stress's me too far I feel a real need to dress and you know what hon It realy does calm me and makes me feel more centered so dont worie why you do it just enjoy who you are couse life dont last long hugs stacylynn1

[noname]

I suspect many like myself have several reasons. I know a main for me is that I'm not a second class citizen and feel I should have every right a woman has.

[ArleneRaquel]

There are actually several reasons that I dress. I love the feel of the cloths, but the main reason is sexual.I receive a rush that is fantastic.:love: From Katrina

[BlkNYLONS]

I would ask myself millions of times why...For me the guilt was almost unbearable at times. I started at such a young age and could not share my crossdressing and fetish with anyone. Of course in school none of the guys ever talked about what I had a life long passion for. I thought many times what If any of my best friends knew their school's star baseball player wore garters, stockings and heels!! I felt so alone....no one would ever understand and I had no clue for answers myself.

[chloe_tv1]

for me its the styles and the feel of the clothes they more nicer than mens

[noname]

for me its the styles and the feel of the clothes they more nicer than mens

ditto ditto ditto.

Seems to be some rule that mens clothing must be made from unsoft fabrics with the same boring cuts that have been used for decades.

[swiss_susan]

I think a lot of us enjoy both sides. I know I could never try to either be a woman or give up all the activities I enjoy in guy mode.

I try to take it all in stride and just enjoy life

[Karen xxx]

Hi Jennifer.
I am also happy being a man but i love to dress and be all girly. Over the years the need to dress has increased and decreased without reason and feelings of guilt have caused me to ditch my clothes a few times but the need to be Karen will always exist. I have come to terms with this now and like you i am building up the courage to go out dressed.
Karen

[JoanFlores]

I have foung that when I am very stressed I need to dress up or at least put on some panties, this makes me feel a lot better. I do belive that like many of us enjoy dressing up but do not want to change into women for good, even if we can pass, I belive it has to do with our inner self.

[Vicky_Scot]

In my humble opinion this behaviour is hardwired into our brains when we are in the womb. I totally believe this is the case.

I do not wish to be a woman. I enjoy me male side and fem side (this side a little bit more) but that's who I am and I cannot change that.

:hugs:

[DAVIDA]

In my humble opinion this behaviour is hardwired into our brains when we are in the womb. I totally believe this is the case.



:hugs:

I agree! I was trying on my mother's things before I knew what sex was!

[Adrienne Heels]

I agree...it all starts when you are young, or at least for me. Wearing mom's shoes at age 5 or so.

[Stephenie S]

Relax!!

Trying to find out WHY is a typical male trait.

Let you feminine side out and just enjoy!!!

Lovies,
Steph

[Janereed]

Today it occured to me out of the blue. "Why do I crave wearing womens clothes?" I am a man, and I like being a man. I like man stuff. Just as I may enjoy being jennifer in public, I also enjoy being a man in public.
Is this behavior hardwired into my brain when I was in the womb, or is it learned as I experienced life? I

Jennifer

Oh god no no no no no. Thats right, 5 nos. Hardwired into your brain in the womb?????????????????? NO!!!!!!!!! Its a sexual fetish, nothing more, nothing less, oh sure forum members may try to convince you otherwise, you yourself may convince yourself otherwise, in fact this thread was proabably part of the self delusion.

Fact is, you have some kind of psycological disadvantage that makes you aroused by female garments. Its a common trait in men that have abnormal levels of testosterone. Get over it.

[Tree GG]

I have given up (at least temporarily) asking why. Which for me was a really big deal to let go of. I think there's as many reasons why as there are CDers and an almost infinite combination of multiple reasons. As a GG I don't pretend to understand all of them.

You're there now, so the easiest and best direction to go is through it. You may find out why on the other side but it won't matter then.

Give yourself the same respect you'd give someone else.

[Karren H]

Who cares why, Jennifer!! Even if you knew it wouldn't change a thing....so just concentrate on what you love to do....

ohhhhhh and practice, practice, practice...

Its hell playing catchup to the real girls!! Hehe

Love Karren

[Gabriellia_Cd]

I have tryied to answer this question many times, I don't think it has an answer at least one answer. All I know is that i like to dress and that is about as far as I can get with this question. I have started and stopped dressing many times, in fact I'm at a pause stage now, and I can never stop for good. I know it is because I don't really want to. Keep dressing and keep enjoying....

Gabby

[Marissa Mae]

There are actually several reasons that I dress. I love the feel of the cloths, but the main reason is sexual.I receive a rush that is fantastic.:love: From Katrina


Same here :o I get a total sexual rush from knowing I am dressed in women's clothing, seeing myself in the mirror, and the feel of my feet in heels and the satin on my skin. Its just a major turn on.

What I wonder most about is "why" the sensation goes away after.. release... you know? After that, I feel like I have to take the clothing off as soon as possible and return to male clothing.. but the feeling returns after a while. And if I stay in the clothing afterwards or don't release, I am constantly feeling that rush. Why is this?

[Melissa A.]

I stopped caring about why a while ago. Theories abound, and I neither have the time, energy, or even the curiousity any more to spend years on the couch trying to discern which fits me. The only thing I will say is that I believe that for most, or at least for me, there may not be a reason. At least not a psychological one. I think (knowing I could very well be wrong) that Gender Dysphoria stars before birth and has something to do with a mix-up regarding the X's and Y's. Depending on how severe the mix up, you end up with a transexual, a full crossdresser, or an occasional panty wearer. I understand that many regard cding as a fetish, which would most likely make it a result of environment. I am skeptical, as being Melissa is largely not sexual for me, although I admit that sometimes there is sexual gratification involved. It mostly makes me feel like a very real part of me has been permitted to surface, and now that I am long past the guilt, shame, and embarrasment that most cd's experience as they mature, it feels nothing but right. I like being a guy, too. But I really enjoy being a girl, frequently.

Why? Really don't care.

Hugs,

Melissa:happy:

[Erika34]

Same here :o I get a total sexual rush from knowing I am dressed in women's clothing, seeing myself in the mirror, and the feel of my feet in heels and the satin on my skin. Its just a major turn on.

What I wonder most about is "why" the sensation goes away after.. release... you know? After that, I feel like I have to take the clothing off as soon as possible and return to male clothing.. but the feeling returns after a while. And if I stay in the clothing afterwards or don't release, I am constantly feeling that rush. Why is this?

Wow, you hit that right on the head....at least where I am concerned. Melinda too. That feeling to get the clothes off right away always confounded me when I just had the most pleasurable experience in them. And I like looking at them in the mirror too! But that feeling to dress, never goes away. Go figure.

Erika

[BlkNYLONS]

Total fetish and passion since I was a very very young boy.

[Victoria Anne]

:love: when I dress it helps me to bring out that feminine side of me that is victoria anne and in a strange since I feel that I am who I was meant to be though I have no desire to be a women ,if that makes any sence. I adore being dressed and I do so as often as possible,at work it can be risky but I do dress there as much as is possible .I even gain some degree of support from my wife.

[julie w]

It has to be hard wired if like me you started cd ing at a very young age
then you do all the man things ,like the military getting married children
and as you get older the pressure cooker kicks in and you are not content
to have a quick dress up when nobodys around , then you go out dressed and
the high and peaceful feeling you get takes over

[Karen Johnson]

That is the question that has been driving me crazy all my life. The great obsession and the great taboo.
For one thing, I like the feel of the clothes on my skin. I love to run my hands over my body while dressed.
When I am dressed as a woman I feel whole. It is the real me.
Also, I love women and feminine things. I complain (jokingly) to my wife as to how unfair it is that I'd be looked upon as odd for chosing to wear a nice skirt instead of trousers. Really, what difference does it make?
And as to the sexual part -- WOW! You girls know what I mean. Sometimes my wife and I have sex while I'm in character and there is nothing more intense than that.
But as to why, figure that out and you're in line for a Nobel Prize.

[Sophia Rearen]

AH, been there, done that. You certainly are on the road to self acceptance. Saying truthfully to yourself "I am a CDer" is the first step. Then, having said that, you feel confined, why should "I" be forced into staying in, "am I a societal prisoner"? Next step, tell somebody you are a cder. Enjoy the journey, it's a long road.

[Lisa Golightly]

Today it occured to me out of the blue. "Why do I crave wearing womens clothes?" I am a man, and I like being a man. I like man stuff. Just as I may enjoy being jennifer in public, I also enjoy being a man in public.

What is this man stuff? I do people stuff.

[kateyliz]

I gave up wondering or even caring a long time ago. My earliest memories include some kind of TG feeling and I just can't worry about it anymore. I just settle for realizing that on the gender spectrum, I am somewhere more to the femme side than the average man. Whatever that is. Hugs, Kathy

[secrets]

"why do I dress"
That is the question!
My best guess based on my experiences are that I relax better if I am wearing something I like (obvious really).
Although I am happy as a man, I cannot understand mens fashion and will only wear something if someone tells me they like it. On the other hand, I know what I like in womens clothing and if I see a beautiful girl wearing something nice, my immediate need is to dress the same. If I see something sexy, I feel like I would be sexy in it, in reality that is probably not the case! so I reckon I am just a man with a womans fashion sense.

[JimLovesHotPink]

Just chiming in with my 2 cents here. I , too, am happy to be here on this earth as a Male and would never want to be a woman full-time . But I also enjoy crossdressing when time allows. For me, I enjoy the feeling of wearing womens clothing, especially during tough times as many here have stated to the fact it is a stress reliever for them to crossdress. Also, if I happen to see an attractive woman out in public somewhere and she is dressed in heels and stockings etc. , that will also get me going and want to dress.

[MarinaTwelve200]

Same here :o I get a total sexual rush from knowing I am dressed in women's clothing, seeing myself in the mirror, and the feel of my feet in heels and the satin on my skin. Its just a major turn on.

What I wonder most about is "why" the sensation goes away after.. release... you know? After that, I feel like I have to take the clothing off as soon as possible and return to male clothing.. but the feeling returns after a while. And if I stay in the clothing afterwards or don't release, I am constantly feeling that rush. Why is this?


I have EXACTLY the same experience---I cant disrobe and "dissasemble" fast enough after my "release"---And I am good for a week or two, B4 the urge hits again.

This suggests a purely "sexual/sensual" root in this case--once we "get off" , we "come back to their senses".

CDing is not a "condition" in itself, but a reaction in response to something deeper---And a VARIETY of underlying causes ARE involved---just as a VARIETY of unrelated underlying causes can cause a fever or cough---same symptom, but a different cause. This is why it is so hard for many of us to figgure out why we CD.-----We may be only aware of two or three reasons for CDing--and none of them fit.----So confusuion and puzzlement results.

I have identified at least EIGHT reasons for CDing . These include a (puzzling) reaction to being Homosexual (Sexual attraction to other men), A reaction to being Transsexual (a female brain in a male body), Fetish for clothing of women, The THRILL of violating social taboos, The THRILL of violating brain barriers concerning self preservation and/or IDENTITY, The RUSH of SM humiliation, STRESS RELEIF by assuming another IDENTITY, or simply because its FUN. Note that only a couple of these involve "sexuality"---the other reasons are either sexuality neutral or hetrosexual, if anything.

Often there are two of these factors in play. I CD for stress releif by escaping my male identity, but also note a bit of a fetish influence too.

The MORE you know about what can cause CDing , the easier it is to finally find out what the cause of it is in YOU ---- That can be a comfort, as it might eliminate certian fears in some people that they nay be (Gasp!) "homosexual", and be able to relax more about it, but Even though you may KNOW the real reason you CD, does not really mean you can do much about it.---its just how YOU naturally react, so enjoy it.

[june58]

I am like the rest of you. I like being a man and doing man things but I also like dressing up in womens clothing. I don't know why and I used to question it but I just accept and enjoy it now. I luv all the different styles, colors and fabrics. There is so much to choose from and it is so much fun. I wouldn't give it up.

[Sejd]

Hi Jennifer
I will try to give you the answer my sexologist gave me, and it is not going to cost you a fortune.
You have bee born with a strong Female sexual template, which mean that you are a man but with a strong female identity. You will never be able to just ignore the fact that you like your femme self. You better embrace it and become a happy girl. I have done just that. I go to work as a male, when I come home, I change into Sejd and then I am a happy girl. My wife love that I have found this true self. why? because I am happy and tolerating and not controlling anymore. You should explore your femnine self and make it a part of your everyday life. Only then will you become a liberated human being. Trust me, it's all worth it. good luck to you my girl
Sejd:love: